RE: Really, Really Bad Advice

RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (Full Version)

All Forums >> [Casual Banter] >> Polls and Other Random Stupidity

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Evanesce -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (7/27/2006 4:18:07 PM)
Borrow 80,000 ants from WWS at the picnic. They can carry 1000 times their own body weight (or something close to that). Train the ants to carry the bags for you. It's storming, and I need to go to the store. I hate carrying umbrellas, though, so how do I get from car to store without getting soaked?

WayWardSoul -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (7/27/2006 5:40:32 PM)
Get yourself one of those umbrellas hats not only will you stay dry but it will make you sexier, and as sexy as you are thats hard to do. I really want to bring my Jar of fire ants to the picnic but I'm not into having a flyswatter used on me. So how can I bring the ants and not have to worry about the flyswatter?

Gauge -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (7/27/2006 8:26:29 PM)
quote: I really want to bring my Jar of fire ants to the picnic but I'm not into having a flyswatter used on me. So how can I bring the ants and not have to worry about the flyswatter? This is so easy that I am shocked you didn't think of it. You dress up as a fire ant queen. You shove all the fire ants up your ass. When you get to the picnic you just "lay your brood" and no one will attack you with a flyswatter. OK, I called 1-800-DIAL -A- NERD and they told me to go soak my head. Will this really fix my computer?

WayWardSoul -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (7/27/2006 8:33:03 PM)
quote: OK, I called 1-800-DIAL -A- NERD and they told me to go soak my head. Will this really fix my computer? Since you was told to CAll 1-800-GeekSquad No it will not Fix your computer it will just make you Lord of the nerds. I need to go to bed so I can get up at 5:30 and I really do need the beauty sleep, but I don't feel like it. what should I do?

SavageFaerie -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (7/27/2006 8:37:18 PM)
Stay up and dont look in the mirror in the morning.. My head is to small for adult size headphones, what should I do to keep them on?

Evanesce -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (7/27/2006 8:38:53 PM)
quote: I need to go to bed so I can get up at 5:30 and I really do need the beauty sleep, but I don't feel like it. what should I do? You should stay on the CM forums for another seven hours, then run six miles, hit the shower and load up on fourteen cups of Starbucks coffee. Who needs sleep? quote: My head is to small for adult size headphones, what should I do to keep them on? Easy... duct tape. I hear orange is a good color for duct tape, too. Find a Schneider driver and ask him to give you some. I took WWS's advice and wore the umbrella hat to the grocery store. However, he told me it would make me sexier, but all it did was make me look like a giant dork. How should I punish him for talking me into wearing that stupid hat?

Gauge -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (7/27/2006 8:46:05 PM)
quote: I took WWS's advice and wore the umbrella hat to the grocery store. However, he told me it would make me sexier, but all it did was make me look like a giant dork. How should I punish him for talking me into wearing that stupid hat? Giant dorks can be sexy... in a giant, dorky kind of way... sort of. But if you feel that you must punish him, then when he shoves the fire ants up his ass, Krazy Glue his ass cheeks together. OK... I called 1-800-GeekSquad and they told me to go soak my head. I told them that I did and that I was now Lord of the Nerds. They hung up on me and my computer is still not fixed. Now what should I do?

mstrj69 -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (7/27/2006 8:48:40 PM)
Who wore the stupid hat and who really needs or wants to be punished?

SavageFaerie -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (7/27/2006 8:56:51 PM)
Get a small Dominant hamster and send it in fully cocked and loaded....those missing sub files may just need some dicipline. I tried the ant trick on moving the cemented bags....didnt work..how do I grow muscles over night so I can carry them to the truck to take them to the dump tomorrow?

Evanesce -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (7/27/2006 9:00:42 PM)
quote: I tried the ant trick on moving the cemented bags....didnt work..how do I grow muscles over night so I can carry them to the truck to take them to the dump tomorrow? Flirt really heavily with all the guys on the CM forum. Their muscles will grow, and they'll do the lifting for you. [;)] How should I explain to that guy above you that he's not playing the game right, and still remain appropriately (cough, cough) "submissive?" hehehehe

WayWardSoul -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (7/27/2006 9:04:33 PM)
quote: How should I explain to that guy above you that he's not playing the game right, and still remain appropriately (cough, cough) "submissive?" hehehehe No need to be nice just hit switch mode and tell him to read how it works and not play the fool. I'm going to bed and will be out of the loop tomorrow when I get up. how do I sleep and stay in the loop?

VandalHeart -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (7/27/2006 9:17:01 PM)
Plug an ethernet cable into your ear while you sleep. Hey, osmosis works for high school students, it might work for you. I want to talk to chantrea, but she doesn't seem to be posting. How do I get her attention?

LaMalinche -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (7/27/2006 9:28:48 PM)
Send her an email with lots and lots of dancing bananas. Everyone around here likes the dancing bananas, expecially Qguage. Actually, come to think of it, when you send her the daning bananas, send him some too. Everyone needs a best friend, and he will want to be yours for that act of thoughtfullness. I can't seem to behave today, and I keep getting in trouble, what should I do?

SavageFaerie -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (7/27/2006 10:13:26 PM)
Why go skinny dipping of course....who cares after that? I just blew the previous advise on getting the concrete moved by flirting with Cm males...what the hell do I do now?

Gauge -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (7/28/2006 12:26:02 PM)
quote: I just blew the previous advise on getting the concrete moved by flirting with Cm males...what the hell do I do now? Well, what you do is you dig around the bags of concrete, then you push the bags into the holes and fill up the holes. If that doesn't work, then take the paper off of the bags and leave them there and tell them that you spent $50,000 to have a French sculpter named Pierre make them for you. It breaks your heart but they must be left with the house. Don't forget to remind them that they are worth $50,000 and that you are GIVING away this fine artwork. It is raining off and on today. I really need something to entertain myself. Thoughts?

SavageFaerie -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (7/28/2006 1:36:51 PM)
I dug the whole and fell in so went to plan B, just showed the house and it was a hit Thanks!!!! Get out in the rain....and go through all the alleys looking for the cat with no name...once found take said raggedy cat and go up to NYC and have Breakfest at Tiffanys and get an engaved diamond collar with no name on it. This should wile away the afternoon. If this isnt an option put your finger on a name in the phone book, call and tell them you are bored and need to discuss your need to pull a woman by the hair and beat the chit out of her...this should keep you busy for a while....and might introduce someone into the lifestyle as well. Okay the next showing is not until 11am tomorrow what should I do till then?

WayWardSoul -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (7/28/2006 1:50:41 PM)
Invite everyone you know for a party, call all the radio stations and have them help spread the word on the party also. I would like to give this sexyfaerie here on CM a flogging, but I don't feel she wants anything to do with that from me what should I do?

ArtimisBlack -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (7/29/2006 12:30:57 PM)
Tie her down and flog her anyway. Then if she's pissed off, let her tie you up and flog you. My car was towed by mistake but they may still make me pay the $300 towing fee and whatever other fees they can come up with. I don't have that kind of money (broke college student in nyc syndrome) so what do I do?

gooddogbenji -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (7/29/2006 12:34:07 PM)
Do a plea bargain - you'll report 10 other cars they can tow within 2 weeks if they give you yours for free. I'm addicted to CM. How do I break the addiction? Yours, benji

ArtimisBlack -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (7/29/2006 12:37:45 PM)
Pee on your computer until it shorts out then go play fetch with your modem. I want to make more money, but to do so I would need to change jobs. I love my job and the people I work for, but they can't afford to give me the raise I would need. What do I do?

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