RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (Full Version)

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sissifytoserve -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (11/15/2006 6:17:42 PM)

She is already making ME her slave and maid.....thats why.


Ithink I have a pinched nerve in my shoulder blade...how do i make it heal faster?



gooddogbenji -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (11/15/2006 6:23:28 PM)

Dude, listen.  Your heel has nothing to do with your shoulder.  One is near your feet, one is near your head.

Well the heel bone's not connected to the shoulder,
the heel bone's not connected to the shoulder,
the heel bone's not connected to the shoulder,
This is such a stupid post.

I, apparently, have no life, as I've been told. 

How do I kill the people who say this without making it obvious?

Yours,


benji



Mikal -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (11/15/2006 9:22:44 PM)

Help them have an 'accident'...
 
How do I properly thank Wandersalone for reposting my post?



LadySeraphina -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (11/16/2006 2:21:04 AM)

Give her the sex you deny to benji, and tell him all about it (you're welcome, benji).

I have a perverse crush on a puppydog, but he won't return my flirts, what should I do?



gooddogbenji -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (11/16/2006 2:28:05 AM)

Puppies like being kicked.  If that doesn't work, kick him again.

It's 5:30 am, I haven't had a day off in weeks, and I want to shoot myself.

How do I overcome my tiredness enough to do this?

Yours,


benji



mistoferin -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (11/16/2006 2:40:03 AM)

Luckily you don't have to. Just come to Michigan and walk in the woods. Right now there are a lot of guys out there who will shoot the first thing that moves.

I'm trying to decide if it's worth my time to go hunting today. It's pouring rain and the winds are gusting up to 25 miles an hour. What should I do?



wandersalone -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (11/16/2006 2:47:49 AM)

Fly to Toronto and hunt Benji - I have heard the weather is always lovely and hunting season never ends in Canada.

By the time I finish writing my really really funny and helpful advice other people have already answered the questions, how can I prevent others from replying before me?



Fitznicely -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (11/16/2006 3:01:45 AM)

Take an umbrella

I'm bored and rapidly running out of tobacco. What can I do??



Gauge -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (11/16/2006 1:24:49 PM)

quote:

By the time I finish writing my really really funny and helpful advice other people have already answered the questions, how can I prevent others from replying before me?


Easy... sit down at your computer and type out every possible 'really funny and helpful' bit of advice that you can think of. Then, once you see a post that you want to respond to, you just cut and paste the answer.

It is raining and windy and there is a tornado watch tonight. What should I do if a tornado does hit?



mnottertail -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (11/16/2006 2:03:27 PM)

Guage,

Lay your birth certificate under the stairs  in the basement or other tornado safehaven near you so the coroner can find it and fill out your death certificate quickly. (and use as a guide to mispell your name properly, of course)

Fitz,

Rapidly sashay your ass out and buy some more.



Winter comes again to minnesota, and here I am, what should I do on the shut-in snow and wind howling nights.



LadySeraphina -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (11/16/2006 2:20:34 PM)

Spend all your time naked, playing and/or having sex. That's what I do.

I have a rule about not kicking doggies, how do I get past it for benji's sake? :D



Fitznicely -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (11/16/2006 3:00:38 PM)

Make benji your doggie and kick him instead.

I've run out of things to write about on my blog and I need inspiration. Can anyone help?



Mikal -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (11/16/2006 3:23:13 PM)

Lurk around other people's blogs & rip off the really good bits...
 
benji won't stop trying to hump my leg. How do I get him to stop?



darchChylde -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (11/16/2006 3:25:19 PM)

turn slightly and hump his face, it may occupy him in something else

i just thought of humping benji's face and it aroused me a little... does this make me gay?

i'm afeared



Gauge -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (11/16/2006 3:32:28 PM)

quote:

i just thought of humping benji's face and it aroused me a little... does this make me gay?


No. What it does make you is a sick freak for wanting to wave your naughty bits into a dog's face. I suggest you hang out on a BDSM website and post in the forums. This should cure you.

I just went and took my garbage to the dumpster. It is pouring rain outside. I mean, it is raining sideways. How am I supposed to tell if the Earth has not shifted upon its axis and we are, right now, hurtling toward our destruction?



LadySeraphina -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (11/16/2006 3:35:17 PM)

Because hurtling toward our destruction would be more fun, and involve guys in robes riding skeletal horses. And Death of Rats.

I have a shameless addiction to Discworld, how do I get myself a Luggage?



mnottertail -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (11/16/2006 4:05:15 PM)

Lose on Wheel of Fortune or Price is Right, their parting gifts are often luggage.





Gauge -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (11/16/2006 7:29:46 PM)

Ron... don't make me have to come over there and smack you. You must post another question or you may not have your ice cream. How many times must I have to tell you this? Did you eat paint chips as a child?

I have computers in my apartment. I mean... a lot of computers. I think they are breeding. How can I tell if they are breeding? Also, how can I determine the sex of a computer so I can keep the males in one room and the females in another?



LadySeraphina -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (11/16/2006 7:50:29 PM)

Computers breed much like the leftovers in the refrigerator. Yes, they are breeding, but computers don't have genders so you might as well give up now.

My spider plants keep making babies, and I don't have the heart to get rid of any of them. How do I turn my house into a spider-plant jungle?



gooddogbenji -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (11/16/2006 7:59:00 PM)

Go outside, find some spiders, plant them, and wait.

I have no question.

Yours,


benji



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