RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (Full Version)

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LadySeraphina -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (11/16/2006 8:00:21 PM)

I have no answer.

Why do people keep watching Survivor, season after season?



Mikal -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (11/16/2006 10:18:12 PM)

Because they have no life & their brain cells have atrophied.
 
Why to I keep getting emails from guys I don't know wanting to know very personal questions about me?



RubberWitch -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (11/17/2006 12:05:37 AM)

You're female, have a pulse, and are on collarme.

I've got no time between now and my birthday (Dec 8), to play with our doll. Any way I can "freeze" her so she doesn't get any funny ideas over the next couple of weeks?



gooddogbenji -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (11/17/2006 8:27:59 AM)

Are you serious?  How is that even a question?  I mean, you have a fucking freezer in your kitchen, don't you?

One kind of fish in my tank just made babies, and another is moving quickly towards it.  How do I keep my fish from doing the nasty in the water?

Yours,


benji



mnottertail -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (11/17/2006 8:33:14 AM)

you need to get the gt3000 (guppy torture 3000) by ron popiel.

I loathe thanksgiving, but am all for stuffing my breadhole, so how do I appear like anything that goes on is interesting, other than the sacred oath "Time to throw the feedbag on guys!!!!"
 



theRose4U -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (11/17/2006 8:35:44 AM)

quote:

How do I keep my fish from doing the nasty in the water?

Get them a nice room at Embassy Suites?

By the way he's trying  to run her off so he can EAT the babies, not make more.



gooddogbenji -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (11/17/2006 8:35:58 AM)

Toothpick the eyes open, tilt your head and staple in place, and replace your neck with a bobble head joint.

I need to get my passport renewed, but I'm too lazy.  What can I do?

Yours,


benji



miaschiavaNY -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (11/17/2006 8:38:16 AM)

stick the male in the freezer
do the fry really need two parents?
I  made a terrible mistake once,I fed frozen brine shrimp to a mother Dempsy
surrounded by newly hatched fry.
Ooops.

Does blood really stain knives?



Fitznicely -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (11/17/2006 8:52:04 AM)

I have a nice sharp cleaver here if you have half an hour and a toe to spare so we can find out.

I'm addicted to downloading spanking porn. Is there a cure?



miaschiavaNY -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (11/17/2006 9:24:42 AM)

mm Hostle was pretty hot..
you only need a cure if its an illness..
"I declare you well" said in my best "wizard of Oz"
(actually it comes out more Darth Vaderish )

can bleach remove all traces of blood from a cleaver?



Fitznicely -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (11/17/2006 9:52:15 AM)

I'll let you know if a few minutes....*KA--THUNK*

Um..is an amputation wound supposed to bleed that much?



Mikal -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (11/17/2006 11:12:41 AM)

Probably not... light the stub on fire to cauterize the wound. If that doesn't work, call in the local Vamps.
 
My housemate is feaking out 'cause I brought home monkey bones... how can I calm him down & keep the bones?



Fitznicely -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (11/17/2006 12:22:27 PM)

Use the monkey bones to read his fortune. He'll be so impressed, he'll let you keep them.

I don't actually need anymore advice. Anyone want a game of chess?



LadyEllen -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (11/17/2006 1:49:35 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Fitznicely

I don't actually need anymore advice. Anyone want a game of chess?



No thanks. Too busy toKnight - have Pawn on. Lots of Bishops getting bashed and there's some Queen in the background moving all over the place.

If a train leaves London for Glasgow at 1530hrs, travelling at 70mph, and a second train leaves Edinburgh for London at 1520hrs, travelling at 65mph. Where will they collide and at what time? (my friend Osama asked me)

E



gooddogbenji -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (11/17/2006 2:48:21 PM)

Tell Osama that the British use the metric system.

Hours are to measured in 10s.

I'm going out to the clubs tonight, and I don't want to.  How do I keep from going without looking like I don't want to?

Yours,


benji



Aileen68 -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (11/17/2006 2:52:52 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: gooddogbenji

I'm going out to the clubs tonight, and I don't want to.  How do I keep from going without looking like I don't want to?

Yours,


benji


Tell them that your favorite male prostitute from Georgia suddenly decided to make a road trip.
I'm having a ton of cravings.  What do I do about them?



gooddogbenji -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (11/17/2006 3:01:54 PM)

Indulge.  The indulge again.  And again, until you are so sick of everything, you never crave again.

That, and are fat, liverless, and stretched big enough for a pringles can.

If I laugh at certain comments, certain people will throw certain fits, and certain mes will get certain [awaiting approval] tags for a certain time.

How do I keep this from happening?

Yours,


benji



Aileen68 -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (11/17/2006 3:04:56 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: gooddogbenji

If I laugh at certain comments, certain people will throw certain fits, and certain mes will get certain [awaiting approval] tags for a certain time.

How do I keep this from happening?

Yours,


benji

Laugh backwards...the mods are slow and will never catch on.
Example...ahahahahahahahahah
or lol
or eeheeh.
I long for pringles cans. How can I get over this desire?



Mikal -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (11/17/2006 3:07:30 PM)

Be certainly certain that you certainly don't want those certain peoples certain tags. Certainly you know this! *smaks a certain dog's certainly almost cute behind*
 
Aileen: I long for pringles cans. How can I get over this desire?
 
Line the pringles cans up in a row, and jump over them. You will have then gotten over your desire. ;)

I don't want to put monkey bones together, but I have to... how do I enjoy this task?

Edited 'cause Aileen is certainly a faster poster than I.



gooddogbenji -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (11/17/2006 3:14:00 PM)

Get yourself a few "no limits slaves."  They're all over, so this should take about 5 minutes.

Put one in a monkey suit.

Take him apart, piece by piece, slowly, deliberately, and painfully.

Then, if you really want, have another slave put him back together.  Or not.  Whatever.

Yours,


benji

Edited to add:  How can I become smarter so I'm not constantly editing?



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