RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (Full Version)

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Fitznicely -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (11/2/2006 1:11:39 AM)

Arm a friend with a hammer and tell them the same story.

I want to be an astronaut! What's the first step?



LadyOunce -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (11/2/2006 1:16:10 AM)

Drive your car as fast as you can and then, sudddenly, slam on the breaks and yank the wheel to one side.

My kidlet keeps waking up at 3 in the morning, what do I do?




Fitznicely -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (11/2/2006 1:21:28 AM)

Bourbon comforter. worked for my two.

My rabbit doesn't love me [:o] Help!



LadyOunce -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (11/2/2006 1:25:29 AM)

Skin it. The stew will warm your stomach and the way to a man's heart is through the stomach so the love will always be with you. Make a muff from the fur. <insert muff joke here>

I want to have my septum pierced but I can't afford it. What should I do?



Fitznicely -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (11/2/2006 1:28:47 AM)

I have a nailgun you can borrow

Anyone know a surefire way of curing chocolate cravings when on a low carb diet?



LadyEllen -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (11/2/2006 3:20:56 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Fitznicely
Anyone know a surefire way of curing chocolate cravings when on a low carb diet?



Eat some chocolate.

How do I stop the voices in my head? The symptoms are always the same - the phone rings and I answer, and then I hear voices telling me to send the purchase order or something. What can be done to solve this distressing situation?

E



SohCahToa -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (11/4/2006 4:24:11 AM)

Wrap foil around your head and only answer the phone in the shower. If the voices say for you to pay me money though I think you should consider their advice maybe.

I want to start a journal on collarme but after reading some of the other journals I’ve come to realise that not enough interesting things happen in my life for that, what should I do? I’m low on journal material as they say.



LadyEllen -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (11/4/2006 8:08:58 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: SohCahToa

I want to start a journal on collarme but after reading some of the other journals I’ve come to realise that not enough interesting things happen in my life for that, what should I do? I’m low on journal material as they say.


Join Al Quaeda and begin a plot to bring down western civilisation. This will get you out of the house, and give you the opportunity to meet lots of interesting people and do exciting things, which you can then tell us about in your journal.

I've spent too long playing Grand Theft Auto, and now firmly believe I'm a well built black guy living in the ghetto and engaged on a criminal quest to dominate the city. How can I cure myself of this obsession, before I kill again?

E



Yang4yin -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (11/6/2006 11:35:22 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyEllen
I've spent too long playing Grand Theft Auto, and now firmly believe I'm a well built black guy living in the ghetto and engaged on a criminal quest to dominate the city. How can I cure myself of this obsession, before I kill again?

E


Grab your "Johnson" and brag to the other homies about how hung you are, and then drop your pants and show it to them. That ought to slow you down for a while.

I'm fed up with the inability to post quickly here. What should I do?



LadySeraphina -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (11/7/2006 12:44:55 AM)

Add 'of poop to the end of everything, then giggle hysterically. Works for me.

I have a strange obsession with adding 'of poop' to the end of my staements (of poop). Do you have any suggestions (of poop)?



RubberWitch -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (11/7/2006 1:11:54 AM)

well, after careful consideration of the problem, your attitudes, and the society we live in, I'm really of the opinion that the best course of action is...
GROW UP!

I have more lego than can be held in one 40ltr storage tub. what should I do?

J



LadySeraphina -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (11/7/2006 1:14:19 AM)

Build a larger storage tub out of lego.

I wanna snake and my houseboy objects. How do I choose between the snake and the houseboy?



LadyEllen -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (11/7/2006 1:39:43 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadySeraphina
.

I wanna snake and my houseboy objects. How do I choose between the snake and the houseboy?


Get the snake regardless and then let them fight it out for you.

I cant be bothered. Any ideas?

E



RubberWitch -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (11/7/2006 3:21:55 AM)

adopt benji, he'll find a way.

Few of my friends understand the wonders of pocky. how do I explain it to them without actually sharing?

J



LadyEllen -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (11/7/2006 5:25:30 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: RubberWitch

Few of my friends understand the wonders of pocky. how do I explain it to them without actually sharing?

J



Tell them to go and get pocked. Direct experience is the only way.

I had no idea what pocky was, but looked it up and apparently its some Japanese foodstuff? Where can I try this in the UK?

E



RubberWitch -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (11/7/2006 6:06:37 AM)

attend IMAF this weekend, and claim your free pack form the cosplay desk!
alternatively order it from tokyotoys.com, or check out any local chinese supermarket

I need another week before saturday? any partical physicists want to have a go?



LadySeraphina -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (11/7/2006 10:44:32 AM)

Say 'to hell with it' and fly away - I have it on good authority you can do so by throwing yourself at the ground and missing.

I keep throwing myself at the ground, but can't seem to miss. What am I doing wrong?



Fitznicely -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (11/7/2006 11:39:23 AM)

I believe there are places you can hire someone to distract you just before the moment of impact...

I seem to have lost my towel. Am I still hoopy?



RubberWitch -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (11/7/2006 12:28:02 PM)

you are still hoopy, but no longer a frood

I'm a geek. help



mnottertail -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (11/7/2006 12:35:44 PM)

There is no help for geeks..........(sorry)

I need a break from the humdrum, what do you suggest?

Ron




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