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RE: respect/trust - - 5/2/2007 1:45:05 PM

WhiplashSmile

Posts: 1472
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Give the same level of trust and repect as you would to complete stranger. From there on out trust and respect should be earned and built based on interaction.

In my opinion, any Dom/me that does not know the meaning of building and earning trust and respect is not living in reality.

Trust and respect is a two way street by the way.

(in reply to marylynn)

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RE: respect/trust - - 5/2/2007 1:47:39 PM

KnightofMists

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quote:

ORIGINAL: marylynn

Do you feel that trust should be given freely? if so, why..
Do you feel that respect should be automatically given? if so, why..

My answer to both is. .NO

simply stated.. what is given cheaply is cheaply valued.

I expect to earn a person's trust and their respect. As I expect them to earn my trust and respect.

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An Optimal relationship is achieved when the individuals do what is best for themselves and their relationship.

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Post #: 42

RE: respect/trust - - 5/2/2007 2:01:13 PM

aSlavesLife

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Joined: 12/1/2006
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quote:

ORIGINAL: MrDiscipline44

I give some modicum of trust to people until the show they are not worth it anymore. As they show the trust was well placed then I'll trust them with more.

Now respect is different, in my eyes. I don't give anyone respect until I see that they are really worth respecting. I'll show them courtesy, but not out and out respect.

I don't think I could have said it any better.

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Post #: 43

RE: respect/trust - - 5/3/2007 6:22:22 AM

m0rgan

Posts: 403
Joined: 3/19/2007
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quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

I thought about this one for a little while, since I seem to be looking at it from a different view.

On both counts (trust and respect) there are different levels within the path of the relationship with another. There's a big difference between where those levels sit between meeting for the first time and after getting to know someone for a while. As was mentioned, it would be foolish to trust someone with your life that you've only known for five minutes, but many of us have people in our lives that W/we have known for lengths of time that this wouldn't be a far stretch.

Having said that, trust, to some level, is given to a small point when I meet someone. Afterall, at first meeting, they haven't given Me a reason to distrust them. Over the course of time, different events will show if that trust should increase. Are they a person of their word? Do they do the things they say they are going to? Are they prone to gossip? How is their honesty level? I think those examples illustrate the point.

Respect is another matter. I happen to make the distinction between respect and common courtesy, since they are really two different things. Almost everyone, in My eyes, deserves common courtesy, until they prove otherwise. Respect is more something that is given over time as I find admirable traits within a person's character. Are they knowledgable, skilled, devoted, loyal, honest, trustworthy..... on and on? In other words, why do they earn My respect? On that, I definitely say respect is earned.

Edited for a spelling error, though there was probably more than one.

ex-fucking-actly, my sentiments entirely, courtesy is a separate but intertwined thing, but probably without starting with that (courtesy), maybe the other two (trust and respect) just don't happen, and the others build on that, sort of a series of steps, broken somewhere within the series is always going to create problems that are difficult, but not impossible, to repair?

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Post #: 44

RE: respect/trust - - 5/3/2007 10:54:58 PM

LadyPact

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Thank you. I was a little concerned when I wrote that post that the response may have been rather long winded for, what appears to be, a simple question.

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Post #: 45

RE: respect/trust - - 5/4/2007 7:09:39 AM

velvetears

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Joined: 6/19/2006
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i have only read the original OP so if i repeat what others have said forgive me. Trust should always be a process that develops over time. To trust someone automatically would be dangerous in my opinion.

As far as respect, there are levels of respect we have for different people. i respect all people untill they prove to me they don't deserve any level of respect from me through their actions. Obviously this is a different level of respect from the respect i would have by knowing someone and understanding their character and values were worth a good measure of respect from me.

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Post #: 46

RE: respect/trust - - 5/4/2007 7:59:42 AM

FemMiss

Posts: 51
Joined: 5/4/2007
From: Egypt
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trust shouldnt be given instantly, but respect is a must for any relationship even at the very beginning.. generally we should respect each other, so why dont respect doms too?!

i like to respect slaves too, i humiliate just when they ask for, i dont like humiliation, but i do it for them...

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Post #: 47