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RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 6/29/2006 10:30:50 PM   
Gauge


Posts: 5689
Joined: 6/17/2005
Status: offline
quote:

Now that I am getting my voice back it appear that my career as a 1-900 operator is over since the raw, throaty appeal was bringing in the callers.  Whatever should I do?


Gargle with large amounts of Draino. This should restore the raw throaty appeal to your voice... plus it will help with constipation.


I am beginning to feel like anxiety is getting the best of me. Is there a good way to relax?




_____________________________

"For there is no folly of the beast of the earth which is not infinitely outdone by the madness of men." Herman Melville - Moby Dick

I'm wearing my chicken suit and humming La Marseillaise.

(in reply to Vendaval)
Profile   Post #: 1281
RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 6/30/2006 5:16:26 AM   
wandersalone


Posts: 4666
Joined: 11/21/2005
Status: offline 		When I am feeling anxious I use lavender (in a bath, oil burner and a few drops sprinkled around me), meditation and I think about people I know who have lives and problems way crappier than mine and I spend some 'me' time gloating

I have caught Vendeval's cold ... is there some way to make her pay and how?

(in reply to Gauge)
Profile   Post #: 1282
RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 6/30/2006 10:14:36 AM   
Vendaval


Posts: 10297
Joined: 1/15/2005
Status: offline 		Sure, mail yourself to me C.O.D.
 
Most of the cold has gone away, now all I wanna do is play! 
 

quote:

ORIGINAL: wandersalone
I have caught Vendeval's cold ... is there some way to make her pay and how?


_____________________________

"Beware, the woods at night, beware the lunar light.
So in this gray haze we'll be meating again, and on that
great day, I will tease you all the same."
"WOLF MOON", OCTOBER RUST, TYPE O NEGATIVE


http://KinkMeet.co.uk

(in reply to wandersalone)
Profile   Post #: 1283
RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 6/30/2006 4:30:57 PM   
Gauge


Posts: 5689
Joined: 6/17/2005
Status: offline
quote:

Most of the cold has gone away, now all I wanna do is play! 


Well then, go get a sand box, some sand, a bucket and shovel and have a blast!


I keep having to take small naps during the day because I get so tired. Is there something I can do to remedy this?

_____________________________

"For there is no folly of the beast of the earth which is not infinitely outdone by the madness of men." Herman Melville - Moby Dick

I'm wearing my chicken suit and humming La Marseillaise.

(in reply to Vendaval)
Profile   Post #: 1284
RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 6/30/2006 4:56:33 PM   
Vendaval


Posts: 10297
Joined: 1/15/2005
Status: offline 		Most definately, get some pussy.  I mean adopt a kitty cat.
Whenever you want to sleep the cat will pester you for attention
and take over the pillow, blissfully sinking her/his claws into your
inner thigh and batting the tail into your eyes, as the fur wafts
upwards through the afternoon light.
I even have a sandbox to offer as a starter.  
 

So I am all ready to go to the beach and play but there are
too many tourists from the Central Valley on the Coast.
What should I do?


 
 
 
 


quote:

ORIGINAL: Gauge
I keep having to take small naps during the day because I get so tired. Is there something I can do to remedy this?


_____________________________

"Beware, the woods at night, beware the lunar light.
So in this gray haze we'll be meating again, and on that
great day, I will tease you all the same."
"WOLF MOON", OCTOBER RUST, TYPE O NEGATIVE


http://KinkMeet.co.uk

(in reply to Gauge)
Profile   Post #: 1285
RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 7/1/2006 10:00:21 AM   
wandersalone


Posts: 4666
Joined: 11/21/2005
Status: offline
  • use makeup to paint open weeping pus-filled sores on your face,arms and legs
  • wear a white pair of bathers and draw a big unsightly brown patch over your butt
  • when you get to your favourite spot at the beach play some death metal on your stereo really loudly and sing along (badly)
  • burp and fart loudly and often
  • as you are walking to the waters edge exclain loudly that you are so glad that the doctor said that your herpes isn't infectious anymore

I am pretty sure that you will soon find that those pesky tourists have conveniently left

I am starting to obsess about other people on here being much funnier than me, given that acknowledging this is not an option due to my competitive nature do you have any other suggestions?


So I am all ready to go to the beach and play but there are
too many tourists from the Central Valley on the Coast.
What should I do?




(in reply to Vendaval)
Profile   Post #: 1286
RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 7/1/2006 11:57:39 PM   
Vendaval


Posts: 10297
Joined: 1/15/2005
Status: offline 		Head out to the nearest Open Mic night and try a new career
as a stand-up comic.
 
I cannot decide between pancakes or french toast for brunch.
What should I do?


quote:

ORIGINAL: wandersalone

I am starting to obsess about other people on here being much funnier than me, given that acknowledging this is not an option due to my competitive nature do you have any other suggestions?



_____________________________

"Beware, the woods at night, beware the lunar light.
So in this gray haze we'll be meating again, and on that
great day, I will tease you all the same."
"WOLF MOON", OCTOBER RUST, TYPE O NEGATIVE


http://KinkMeet.co.uk

(in reply to wandersalone)
Profile   Post #: 1287
RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 7/2/2006 8:22:25 AM   
missgiveNTake


Posts: 673
Joined: 3/22/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Vendaval

I cannot decide between pancakes or french toast for brunch.
What should I do?



Have both, Layer them alternating so you get a bit of each in every bite.

The little humidity we get makes it hard to breathe. How can I make it easier to breathe?

_____________________________

I am a very good girl, very good at all I do.

Highly intelligent with a generous pinch of the absurd! (Thank you Crouchingtigress)

(in reply to Vendaval)
Profile   Post #: 1288
RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 7/2/2006 11:25:47 AM   
ArtimisBlack


Posts: 154
Joined: 6/13/2006
Status: offline 		Buy a large spray bottle and fill it with water. Continuously spray in front of you wherever you go and please don't worry about getting other people wet. They will enjoy it. This is especially effective around live electricity.
 
I want to furnish my new apartment, but even though I work full time, I can’t afford to. What should I do to make a lot of money, fast?
 

_____________________________

I wanted to put in my 2 cents but I only have a dollar. Do you have change?

The pain is free. Do not pick the scab.

(in reply to missgiveNTake)
Profile   Post #: 1289
RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 7/2/2006 1:50:03 PM   
LTRsubNW


Posts: 1604
Joined: 5/6/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Gauge
I want to get rust stains out of my toilet... how do I do that?


Home depot.  New toilet.




(in reply to Gauge)
Profile   Post #: 1290
RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 7/2/2006 1:51:11 PM   
LTRsubNW


Posts: 1604
Joined: 5/6/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Thanatosian

go get a can of rust colored paint that is good for use on porcelain and paint the entire toilet rust colored - voila! no more unsightly rust stains visible


Now THAT's good advice!

"When everyone else zigs....zag".

(in reply to Thanatosian)
Profile   Post #: 1291
RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 7/2/2006 1:53:50 PM   
LTRsubNW


Posts: 1604
Joined: 5/6/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: BitaTruble
I want to hang up a bird feeder, what kind should I use?


Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha.

(Now....does anyone know how to get a full mouthfull of Pepsi off my monitor?)


(in reply to BitaTruble)
Profile   Post #: 1292
RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 7/2/2006 1:55:33 PM   
LTRsubNW


Posts: 1604
Joined: 5/6/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: BitaTruble

quote:



How do I get doms to stay away from Mine?



STD's



ROFLMFFAO (three times!)

Okay....now does anyone know how to stop a persistant cough caused from laughing my fucking ass off?

(in reply to BitaTruble)
Profile   Post #: 1293
RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 7/2/2006 1:56:57 PM   
LTRsubNW


Posts: 1604
Joined: 5/6/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: maybemaybenot
How do  I make iced tea from scratch?


(You don't...that's gross...and I'm never eating at your house again!)

(in reply to maybemaybenot)
Profile   Post #: 1294
RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 7/2/2006 1:58:50 PM   
LTRsubNW


Posts: 1604
Joined: 5/6/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Mistrix

hehe...I would see the doc about the abortion.....

I wished for a penis for a day but it hasn't happened.  What should I do??


I have one I could loan you. 

(Hey...I'm a giver, what can I say?)

(in reply to Mistrix)
Profile   Post #: 1295
RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 7/2/2006 2:02:41 PM   
LTRsubNW


Posts: 1604
Joined: 5/6/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Oumae

I want a holiday where should I go? 


(I've always had a personal fondness for Seattle...but that's just me)

(in reply to Oumae)
Profile   Post #: 1296
RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 7/2/2006 2:06:14 PM   
LTRsubNW


Posts: 1604
Joined: 5/6/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Gauge

I have a blood stain on my carpet, how do I get rid of it?


Contact your local CSI.  They'll have several ideas.

(in reply to Gauge)
Profile   Post #: 1297
RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 7/2/2006 2:09:33 PM   
LTRsubNW


Posts: 1604
Joined: 5/6/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: BitaTruble
If you are only spotting, you need to cut deeper for a more uniform flow.

The snow season is now over. What should I do with my snow blower?


(Could this answer somehow be connected to the problem with the neighbors dog?)

(in reply to BitaTruble)
Profile   Post #: 1298
RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 7/2/2006 2:13:14 PM   
LTRsubNW


Posts: 1604
Joined: 5/6/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MyCaptainsPet
What should i do to get over my fear of the dark?



Easy:  Move to Alaska for 6 months, then Antarctica for the other.

(in reply to MyCaptainsPet)
Profile   Post #: 1299
RE: Really, Really Bad Advice - 7/2/2006 2:14:24 PM   
LTRsubNW


Posts: 1604
Joined: 5/6/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Evanesce

Should I muzzle my dog to stop her incessant barking at the cars going by my house all night?


No.

Two words:  Spike Strips.

(in reply to Evanesce)
Profile   Post #: 1300
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