RE: Really, Really Bad Advice

RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (Full Version)

All Forums >> [Casual Banter] >> Polls and Other Random Stupidity

Message

CalliopePurple -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (12/12/2006 12:31:50 AM)
Borrow someone else's car. I recently moved and my clothes are still in my duffel bags. How can I motivate myself to unpack?

ShreveportMaster -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (12/12/2006 1:43:39 AM)
Do a tribute to "The naked guy" through the entire month of Dec. I find Myself incredibly attracted to a much older woman, how do I cure this?

unownedredhead -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (12/12/2006 1:53:25 AM)
Electrolysis! trust me one a week for a year of a needle stabbing your pubic area over and over and you will never complain of a headache again. I have been invited to a gorean party as a free range slave. should I get really drunk first?

Kittykit -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (12/12/2006 2:30:34 AM)
Yes but make sure you don't wear underwear How can I get ink stains out of a shirt?

denika -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (12/12/2006 3:31:40 AM)
You can throw a little bleach on it or just cut out the ink stain part and sew in a patch...Or even better wear the shirt with the ink stain but don't wear any pants, everyone will be to distracted looking at a naked tush to notice the ink stain. There is a racoon in my living room, what should I do? denika

LadyEllen -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (12/12/2006 3:33:27 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Kittykit How can I get ink stains out of a shirt? Take it to SMP's older woman; the wisdom of age encompasses all - including the removal of ink stains. Meanwhile, this will also solve SMP's problem with his attraction to her, as she will be much too busy removing the ink stain to worry about his attentions. There are not enough sexual puns in this thread of late. What question can I ask which will result in more examples of this classic British artform? E

LadyEllen -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (12/12/2006 3:36:47 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: denika There is a racoon in my living room, what should I do? A racoon? Why not a cat or a beaver? Racoons make for poor sexual innuendo. Feed it and play with it, and remember to wipe the rabid froth from its mouth as this will result in more stains. Should I grow a handlebar moustache? Its meant to look distinguished you know? And I fancy a few kinky Victorian style games, for which such a moustache is an obvious accessory. E

petdave -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (12/12/2006 6:07:22 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LadyEllen Should I grow a handlebar moustache? Its meant to look distinguished you know? And I fancy a few kinky Victorian style games, for which such a moustache is an obvious accessory. E It depends on the quality of your diabolical cackle. If that's your "go-to" mating call, then a handlebar moustache to twirl around your finger is an absolute necessity. Otherwise, handlebars are really only useful accessories on submissives. i discovered a serious problem on my way home from shopping last night. i bought a fresh, tasty loaf of sliced bread, then cleverly placed a case of soda on top of it, reducing it to a mere 1-1/2" in height. How can i restore its previously proud, plump profile?

Petruchio -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (12/12/2006 9:05:45 AM)
quote: i discovered a serious problem on my way home from shopping last night. i bought a fresh, tasty loaf of sliced bread, then cleverly placed a case of soda on top of it, reducing it to a mere 1-1/2" in height. How can i restore its previously proud, plump profile? It's simply a matter of physics, reducing the surroundings to a near-vacuum causing the air in trapped in the bread to puff out again. The simplest technique is to send the bread up in the space shuttle and ask them to set loaf outside but positioned where the sun or shuttle vents can keep it from freezing. Of course you have to eat it there too, or it will partially collapse again upon return. Er, Daved has left the planet. How can we help him continue to communicate on CM?

pinkkeith -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (12/12/2006 9:50:21 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Petruchio Er, Daved has left the planet. How can we help him continue to communicate on CM? Watch Star Trek and soon you will learn how to make a sub-space communicator. Build one send it out to him so that he can connect to the internet and talk on CM. I need a good joke to say or do before giving my big speech at the company party. What should I say or do?

CalliopePurple -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (12/12/2006 12:25:34 PM)
I'm sure one of Murphy's Laws says that you'll hurt yourself in some amusing way before the speech. So all you have to do for humor is tell the story. I can't stay warm, no matter what the temperature in the apartment is. How can I fix this?

PALittleGirl -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (12/12/2006 1:14:07 PM)
Get a dozen cats and make them all sleep on your bed, the combined body heat will keep you warm. How do I tell CalliopePurple that I thinkwe have a mutual aquaintance without being all creepy stalkerlike about it?

jblack -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (12/12/2006 3:36:57 PM)
Post a message on a board and . . . wait a minute, you were just . . . I feel so used. So terribly dirty and used. Do it again! Nearly all of my condoms expire within a week (it's been a dry year for me, people). How can I put them to the best use?

Kittykit -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (12/12/2006 8:00:30 PM)
Give them to your grandmother.. My ex is a crazy stalker what should I do

Lorelei115 -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (12/12/2006 8:52:57 PM)
Stalk them back. It will freak the hell out of them. I want to redecorate my apartment, but am low on cash. Help?

DiurnalVampire -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (12/12/2006 9:00:52 PM)
Fingerpaints. Everything will look WAY different. Just get used to the crunch once it dries. I have too much stuff and not enough room... what should I do?

jblack -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (12/12/2006 9:13:10 PM)
Burn down your house and everything in it (except you and your darlings, of course). You'll end up with no stuff, and your new ceilings will be sky-high. On another note, I miss puns, too, LadyEllen. My nephew needs to get a flu shot, but he's too scared of the needle. How do I convince him that there's nothing to fear from a little prick?

Petruchio -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (12/12/2006 9:36:56 PM)
quote: My nephew needs to get a flu shot, but he's too scared of the needle. How do I convince him that there's nothing to fear from a little prick? For a little prick, might I suggest a penile implant? Black's nephew is getting a penile implant. What kind of get-well card should we get him?

DiamondOrchid -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (12/12/2006 11:02:58 PM)
A well endowed one. I'm tired, cranky and bitchy. And I don't want to go to bed. Any advice?

Mikal -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (12/12/2006 11:11:22 PM)
Advice: Don't wear a white suit when riding in an open jeep through a mud puddle. I'm tired of writing exams and just want to hibernate. What should I do?

Page: << < prev 141 142 [143] 144 145 next > >>

Collarchat.com © 2025

Terms of Service

0.125