RE: Really, Really Bad Advice

RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (Full Version)

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pinkkeith -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (12/8/2006 2:04:37 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Aileen68 quote: ORIGINAL: pinkkeith How can I keep track of the birthdays of my family and friends? I keep forgetting when they are. Just kill em all. Then you won't have to remember all of those pesky dates. Does it make me a sadist if I laughed at this? [:D] quote: ORIGINAL: Aileen68 I'm starting to not feel well. What should I do? Since feeling well is all in your head just chant over and over again "I am healthy". Your body will soon improve and you won't feel sick. This also works for weight loss. Every morning when you wake up just say "I'm going to loss weight today" and you will. Its the power of the mind! I would love to learn Japanese. What is the quickest way to learn the language?

Dragonskiss72 -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (12/8/2006 4:04:44 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: pinkkeith quote: ORIGINAL: Aileen68 quote: ORIGINAL: pinkkeith How can I keep track of the birthdays of my family and friends? I keep forgetting when they are. Just kill em all. Then you won't have to remember all of those pesky dates. Does it make me a sadist if I laughed at this? [:D] quote: ORIGINAL: Aileen68 I'm starting to not feel well. What should I do? Since feeling well is all in your head just chant over and over again "I am healthy". Your body will soon improve and you won't feel sick. This also works for weight loss. Every morning when you wake up just say "I'm going to loss weight today" and you will. Its the power of the mind! I would love to learn Japanese. What is the quickest way to learn the language? Take up French - it's easier where do I hide the bodies of the people I've killed to avoid remembering pesky dates?

Mikal -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (12/8/2006 4:17:51 PM)
Buy a really really big dog (ie Mastiff, Irish Wolfhound) that eats a lot. Your 'hiding place' will be solved, and you won't go bankrupt feeding the pooch! Where would I find someone who can make a decent pot of chicken noodle soup? My Mom's not available.

CalliopePurple -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (12/8/2006 6:56:15 PM)
Ask your friends' moms. One of them is sure to know how to make a good pot of it. I love caffeine, but it makes my stomach very upset. How should I deal?

Sinergy -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (12/8/2006 7:14:15 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: pinkkeith I would love to learn Japanese. What is the quickest way to learn the language? Fly to Japan one way. Go into a brothel / geisha house. Apply for a job. People call me on the phone and ask questions. They want answers. What do I do?

CalliopePurple -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (12/8/2006 8:37:34 PM)
Pretend you know the answers, even when you don't. I live in Seattle, but Starbuck's is overpriced. What should I do for my mocha fix?

jblack -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (12/9/2006 12:15:03 AM)
Hey, I live in Seattle, too. Round up all the other Seattlites and stage a protest of Starbucks; we'll demand free coffee since, after all, we put Starbucks on the map! If it weren't for us, they wouldn't be perfectly poised to take over the world. Heck, they OWE us coffee! After shouting "free coffee" for a few hours, they're bound to give in and hand you a mocha. I'm dealing with a Dom who is obsessed with scanning pictures so he can email them to me. How do I let him know that it would be better if I didn't have so much visual information?

jblack -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (12/9/2006 12:18:23 AM)
Oh, how embarassing. One of my prepositional phrases is dangling. I know that very few people care, but I feel compelled to apologize for the sake of grammer. Poor grammer. It's ever so abused.

ElectraGlide -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (12/9/2006 12:20:42 AM)
I can buy a twelve pack of beer cheaper than one cup of Starbucks Coffie. I see the half wits in he mall lined up at Starbucks they are just bandwagon jumpers trying to do the in thing and feel high and mighty with their Starbucks Coffie..

jblack -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (12/9/2006 12:21:35 AM)
Yikes! I mean, grammar. Poor, poor grammar. I think I need to get some sleep. Actually, I think I need a lot of sleep. My question about the photo-obsessed Dom remains for those of you who are still awake enough to offer some bad advice.

ElectraGlide -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (12/9/2006 12:28:27 AM)
Why do you not want so much information about the photo obsessed dom.

Sinergy -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (12/9/2006 1:28:52 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: jblack Oh, how embarassing. One of my prepositional phrases is dangling. I know that very few people care, but I feel compelled to apologize for the sake of grammer. Poor grammer. It's ever so abused. :Problems with dangling participles? Speak in binary. My parents think the ex-wife I gave my house to, who continually tries to sue me, and egregiously violates the divorce orders, is a saint. What should I do?

LadyEllen -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (12/9/2006 3:01:57 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Sinergy My parents think the ex-wife I gave my house to, who continually tries to sue me, and egregiously violates the divorce orders, is a saint. What should I do? She could well be a saint - therefore it would be better if her beneficient influence could be extended far and wide by way of her relics. Beatify her to death, dismember the corpse and distribute via Greyhound bus all over the US. If the cops catch up with you, you have a great insanity plea going too. I simply cant be bothered. How do I reacquire my botherability? E

Aileen68 -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (12/9/2006 10:49:12 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LadyEllen I simply cant be bothered. How do I reacquire my botherability? E Become a politician. My feet are freezing even with socks on. What should I do?

Sinergy -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (12/9/2006 10:56:34 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: jblack Oh, how embarassing. One of my prepositional phrases is dangling. I know that very few people care, but I feel compelled to apologize for the sake of grammer. Poor grammer. It's ever so abused. Neuter your prepositional phrases so they no longer dangle. I am working a job where I am crawling around on multi-ton 40 foot iron pipes and hook them up to the crane sling to be lifted out. If the sling breaks and this falls into the hold, how do I avoid being a grease spot? Sinergy

Aileen68 -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (12/9/2006 11:00:53 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Sinergy I am working a job where I am crawling around on multi-ton 40 foot iron pipes and hook them up to the crane sling to be lifted out. If the sling breaks and this falls into the hold, how do I avoid being a grease spot? Sinergy Scream like a little girl and wait for Superman to wisk you out of harms way. And my feet are still friggin cold. What do I do about that?

Mikal -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (12/9/2006 11:36:08 AM)
Shove them up benji's butt. And get him to bring you some Starbucks while he's on his way over. Just sniff carefully before you drink.... [:D] I sliced my hand really bad, but the Prof still wants me to write my exam. What should I do?

Aileen68 -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (12/9/2006 11:38:35 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Mikal I sliced my hand really bad, but the Prof still wants me to write my exam. What should I do? Drop something really heavy on your toe...you'll forget about the pain in your hand. I have the need for some anal/foot lube, but alas, I am without some. What shall I use?

Petruchio -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (12/9/2006 12:55:09 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Aileen68 I have the need for some anal/foot lube, but alas, I am without some. What shall I use? Someone want's to put their foot in your ass? Well, to each her own. However, I highly recommend John Deere crankcase lube. It's high quality and refined in this country, not the Middle East. Help: My friend Aileen keeps leaving heavy black smears everywhere she sits. Any ideas how she can attend formal functions without the embarrassment of greasy black ass?

pinkkeith -> RE: Really, Really Bad Advice (12/9/2006 2:29:41 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Petruchio Help: My friend Aileen keeps leaving heavy black smears everywhere she sits. Any ideas how she can attend formal functions without the embarrassment of greasy black ass? Buy a white dress, put it on the floor and play sit-and-spin. Soon the dress will match the colors that she leaves behind and no one will notice. I finally found the key to the safe that contains all of my Dom's equipment. He told me never to touch them. How can I avoid the temptation?

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