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Help displaying - 4/19/2009 6:34:52 PM   
ncbabe


Posts: 1060
Joined: 4/19/2009
Status: offline 		My new owner does not live close to me and requires me to display for him via webcam.  I have not done this before and am worried because a) I am very shy and b) I do not really know what I am supposed to do.  I have talked to my owner about this but he has not given me any specific instructions and says he just wants to see first of all how I choose to present myself to him.  He is very patient and tells me not to worry, but I do not want to look foolish in front of him when he sees me do this for the first time.  Does anyone have any advice? Thank you!
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: Help displaying - 4/19/2009 6:41:24 PM   
AquaticSub


Posts: 14867
Joined: 12/27/2005
Status: offline 		Take a deep breath. Have you ever met this man? Talked on the phone with him? Ask him what he means by present yourself. Are you presenting yourself to stimulate him sexually or as you would if he was taking you to meet his parents. Without some sort of guideline, I'd be relucant to present myself to judgement as well but if I was going to do it, I would present myself as I would for a blind date in a nice resturant. Bit of cleavage, nothing too much and nice make-up.

_____________________________

Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

Member:Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair

(in reply to ncbabe)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: Help displaying - 4/19/2009 6:49:29 PM   
ncbabe


Posts: 1060
Joined: 4/19/2009
Status: offline 		He means sexually.  We have seen each other on cam (clothed) and he has seen pics of my body but he now wants to see it on cam.  I'm okay with what he wants, I just don't know how to go about doing it.  We have not met in person yet, but we have talked on the phone for endless hours.

(in reply to AquaticSub)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: Help displaying - 4/19/2009 6:59:32 PM   
Fitznicely


Posts: 1597
Joined: 10/18/2006
Status: offline 		I suggest research. A couple of wellknown dating sites have member's cam areas where you can watch and gather some ideas.

_____________________________

I tell you this: No eternal reward will forgive us now for wasting the dawn
Proud Owner of Darkmoonkat. Such a good girl!

(in reply to ncbabe)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: Help displaying - 4/19/2009 7:09:35 PM   
CarrieO


Posts: 2432
Joined: 1/27/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ncbabe

He means sexually.  We have seen each other on cam (clothed) and he has seen pics of my body but he now wants to see it on cam.  I'm okay with what he wants, I just don't know how to go about doing it. 

Is there some reason why he isn't willing to offer you guidance with this?
 
 

I have talked to my owner about this but he has not given me any specific instructions and says he just wants to see first of all how I choose to present myself to him.


If all he wants is for you to present yourself as you choose then you need to do what you think is right and what is comfortable for you.  He's not offering any guidance so I don't see how he would be able to claim disappointment if he is allowing you to make this choice. 



We have not met in person yet, but we have talked on the phone for endless hours.


Endless hours over what time period?  Days, weeks, months? 


< Message edited by CarrieO -- 4/19/2009 7:10:21 PM >

_____________________________

"No matter what happens in the kitchen, never apologize"~Julia Child~


(in reply to ncbabe)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: Help displaying - 4/19/2009 7:10:11 PM   
MsDDom


Posts: 368
Joined: 1/1/2009
From: GA
Status: offline
quote:

He means sexually.


...if u know it is sexually, then ask specifics so u know what he wants. u said he is patient w/ u, so surely he will not mind u inquiring b/c u want to do it correctly.  we can't tell u what he wants to see...


_____________________________

...:: MsDDom ::...
... live Life honestly ...

(in reply to ncbabe)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: Help displaying - 4/19/2009 7:17:01 PM   
catize


Posts: 3020
Joined: 3/7/2006
Status: offline 		He “owns” you but you have never met.  I wouldn’t agree to be owned by someone I’ve never seen in person.  I certainly would not display myself sexually on cam at this juncture.
He needs to be willing to meet you in real life.  Sorry, but your scenario makes me think he is just looking to get off on cam.
Trust, but verify…..and if he doesn’t like it, big indication he has no intentions of moving this to real time.

_____________________________

"Power is real. But it's a lot less real if it's not perceived as power."
Robert Parker, Stranger in Paradise

(in reply to ncbabe)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: Help displaying - 4/19/2009 7:18:22 PM   
lovingpet


Posts: 4270
Joined: 6/19/2005
Status: offline 		I have no real advice here except that I just wouldn't. Not no way, not no how. If the distance is too much to even meet face to face for the first time, then I would be lacking that real flesh and blood aspect I desire. If someone I had met and even played with before wanted me to do this, that would be something entirely different. It's not something I am into, don't even own a webcam, but I might for someone I shared a real time connection with.

As for what to show him? I wouldn't show him anything you don't want displayed all over the web. That is the reality of what can happen with this, so guard yourself against it. If you are happy with it all being out there to the public, then I guess you can give him whatever show you'd like. Nudity and masturbation are usually good choices for sexual displays of the real time variety and I can't imagine they would be turned down in the cyber world either. Judgement is your best friend with this.

lovingpet

(in reply to MsDDom)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: Help displaying - 4/19/2009 7:29:51 PM   
ncbabe


Posts: 1060
Joined: 4/19/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: CarrieO

quote:

ORIGINAL: ncbabe

He means sexually.  We have seen each other on cam (clothed) and he has seen pics of my body but he now wants to see it on cam.  I'm okay with what he wants, I just don't know how to go about doing it. 

Is there some reason why he isn't willing to offer you guidance with this?
 
I think he just wants to see how I do on my own.



I have talked to my owner about this but he has not given me any specific instructions and says he just wants to see first of all how I choose to present myself to him.


If all he wants is for you to present yourself as you choose then you need to do what you think is right and what is comfortable for you.  He's not offering any guidance so I don't see how he would be able to claim disappointment if he is allowing you to make this choice. 


He has told me that he will not be disappointed in me and that I should relax and just do what I feel comfortable with.  But I feel so self conscious I'm not sure I can relax.  I'm not used to showing my body on cam, but I do want to.  I guess my question should be more along the lines of is there anything I can do to make this easier for me?



We have not met in person yet, but we have talked on the phone for endless hours.


Endless hours over what time period?  Days, weeks, months? 

4 weeks.  I know that's not long but we are in touch online every day and talk on the phone every other day or so.

(in reply to CarrieO)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: Help displaying - 4/19/2009 7:31:15 PM   
Kirata


Posts: 15477
Joined: 2/11/2006
From: USA
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ncbabe

I'm okay with what he wants, I just don't know how to go about doing it.

Accepting everything else without comment, you have stated the problem rather precisely. He's not telling you. You are willing, you are ready to obey, and he's not guiding you, he's not instructing you, he isn't doing fucking anything.

How good are you at math?
 
K.


(in reply to ncbabe)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: Help displaying - 4/19/2009 7:36:38 PM   
JstAnotherSub


Posts: 6174
Status: offline 		dont do anything you dont want plastered all over the net.....thats my advice

_____________________________

yep

(in reply to ncbabe)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: Help displaying - 4/19/2009 7:38:20 PM   
ncbabe


Posts: 1060
Joined: 4/19/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: lovingpet

I have no real advice here except that I just wouldn't. Not no way, not no how. If the distance is too much to even meet face to face for the first time, then I would be lacking that real flesh and blood aspect I desire. If someone I had met and even played with before wanted me to do this, that would be something entirely different. It's not something I am into, don't even own a webcam, but I might for someone I shared a real time connection with.

As for what to show him? I wouldn't show him anything you don't want displayed all over the web. That is the reality of what can happen with this, so guard yourself against it. If you are happy with it all being out there to the public, then I guess you can give him whatever show you'd like. Nudity and masturbation are usually good choices for sexual displays of the real time variety and I can't imagine they would be turned down in the cyber world either. Judgement is your best friend with this.

lovingpet

 
I will not be showing my face on cam when I do it and he knows this.

(in reply to lovingpet)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: Help displaying - 4/19/2009 7:59:10 PM   
DarkSteven


Posts: 28072
Joined: 5/2/2008
Status: offline 		Hey, guys, she's saying that she hasn't done it yet and he hasn't given her guidance.  This isn't a big issue - he'll guide her during the camshow.  She's just getting worried beforehand.

_____________________________

"You women....

The small-breasted ones want larger breasts. The large-breasted ones want smaller ones. The straight-haired ones curl their hair, and the curly-haired ones straighten theirs...

Quit fretting. We men love you."

(in reply to ncbabe)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: Help displaying - 4/19/2009 8:08:56 PM   
NihilusZero


Posts: 4036
Joined: 9/10/2008
From: Nashville, TN
Status: offline 		This is rather...odd, and I'm not sure how much of it is cold feet and/or unfamiliarity with naughty camming and how much is utter lack of reassuring communication. Also, I'm kind of confused how, at some point (if there's this much intimacy already), it didn't accidentally escalate into something naughty/playful when you both were camming 'normally'....but...

quote:

ORIGINAL: ncbabe

I'm okay with what he wants, I just don't know how to go about doing it.

Um...how would you dress to impress/seduce/arouse someone courting you if they were to arrive at your door for a private dinner?


_____________________________

"I know it's all a game
I know they're all insane
I know it's all in vain
I know that I'm to blame."
~Siouxsie & the Banshees

NihilusZero.com

CM Sex God du Jour
CM Hall Monitor

(in reply to ncbabe)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: Help displaying - 4/19/2009 8:16:21 PM   
catize


Posts: 3020
Joined: 3/7/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: DarkSteven

Hey, guys, she's saying that she hasn't done it yet and he hasn't given her guidance.  This isn't a big issue - he'll guide her during the camshow.  She's just getting worried beforehand.


Well, she said this:
quote:

   he has not given me any specific instructions and says he just wants to see first of all how I choose to present myself to him. 

This could be benign, but he knows she is unsure what would please him.  I would think he could put a little effort into being specific!


_____________________________

"Power is real. But it's a lot less real if it's not perceived as power."
Robert Parker, Stranger in Paradise

(in reply to DarkSteven)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: Help displaying - 4/19/2009 8:29:53 PM   
chamberqueen


Posts: 1597
Joined: 10/25/2007
From: Kalamazoo, MI
Status: offline 		I'm sure he will guide you during the process.  Work on your confidence, and smile - even if he can't see it.  That will help to bolster you.

_____________________________



(in reply to catize)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: Help displaying - 4/19/2009 8:56:05 PM   
DemonKia


Posts: 5521
Joined: 10/13/2007
From: Chico, Nor-Cali
Status: offline 		However it goes, it'll be an educational experience . . . . .

None of this is all that different from more traditional dating -- if you'd feel comfortable doing whatever in-person, & you feel comfortable doing whatever online, then . . .. . *shrugs shoulders*

Speaking from personal experience, I'd rather short-term infatuations end after chatting / camming / cybering than after a brief in-person fling, given a choice between the modes . . . . ..

Have fun . . . . .

_____________________________

Snarko ergo sum.



The Verbossinator

(in reply to ncbabe)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: Help displaying - 4/19/2009 9:05:27 PM   
marysdream


Posts: 126
Joined: 5/31/2008
Status: offline 		obviously if you are having reservations about this then you should not engage, and if he cares for you will understand, also if this is an lol..on line thing you would be a fool to engage! please use common sense with the men on here! and also remember they can tape whatever you send to be shown anywhere on the net!
good luck
ree!

(in reply to ncbabe)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: Help displaying - 4/19/2009 9:17:15 PM   
proudsub


Posts: 6142
Joined: 1/31/2004
From: Washington
Status: offline 		Besides what others have said about capturing your images and posting them, beware that he also could have others there watching with him.

_____________________________

proudsub

"Without goals you become what you were. With goals you become what you wish." .

"You are entitled to your own opinions but not your own facts"--Alan Greenspan


(in reply to marysdream)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: Help displaying - 4/20/2009 4:26:41 AM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline 		Meet him first.

Unless you're fine with him spreading these pictures of you all over the net.

_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!


(in reply to proudsub)
Profile   Post #: 20
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