RE: Frustration? or is it more?

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RE: Frustration? or is it more? - 3/18/2007 7:58:44 PM

slavemaia

Posts: 395
Joined: 8/26/2006
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quote:

ORIGINAL: KnightofMists

Today when I logged on I happen to see a profile of someone I know within the community. I happen to catch a journal entry that caught my attention and I read the profile. It was clear from the journal the person was frustated with all the game playing that comes from the online environment. But... I wondered.. did the words that appeared to be expressed in frustration also expressed a deeper truth of the person's intent and ideals?

The following is what caught my attention.

"If you can't give Me what I want, if you can't take Me wanting/demanding your obedience, devotion, and masochism, then go away. This is for Me, not you"

I can't help but wonder if this person's frustration and attempt to push away these so called game players is also going to push away the quality this person is actually seeking.

So.. what are your thoughts when you see words like this?

i see a red neon light flashing "move on". No relationship and i mean no relationship is just for one person. As a slave, yes, i receive tremendous fulfillment in being owned, in obedience, in surrender. But i am also very loved and cherished and so it's not ALL about Him. Sometimes i wonder where the term "power exchange" was derived because it appears there's a belief prevalent among many doms and dominas that it's all about them. To me that's not power exchange, that's power transference - the sub or slave being expected to transfer all their power over to the dominant in exchange for nothing.

The statement "If you can't give Me what I want, if you can't take Me wanting/demanding your obedience, devotion, and masochism, then go away. This is for Me, not you", expresses an extremely self-centered, self-seeking, arrogant and egotistical person, in my opinion. There's no feeling of exchange or mutual benefit. Sounds to me like they're looking for a doormat, not a sub or slave.

_____________________________

She reaches up, not for the apple, but for what causes it to be there.
slave to love - - Chairman's maia

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RE: Frustration? or is it more? - 3/18/2007 9:30:49 PM

slavegirljoy

Posts: 1207
Joined: 11/6/2006
From: North Carolina, USA
Status: offline

For me, reading what sounds to be a very sincere and straight from the gut sentiment in a Dom's journal would draw me to Him, not push me away. This is exactly the type of Dom that i feel very connected to. It sounds to me as though He knows exactly what He is looking for and He is being very honest about who He is and what He wants. Those are two very important and necessary qualities for the Dom to possess, for me to want to serve Him. For me, it is for Him, not me. And, giving Him what He wants/demands and being obedient, devoted and masochistic is what gives me the warm fuzzy feeling inside that draws me to submission.

slave joy
Owned property of Master David

quote:

ORIGINAL: KnightofMists

"If you can't give Me what I want, if you can't take Me wanting/demanding your obedience, devotion, and masochism, then go away. This is for Me, not you"

I can't help but wonder if this person's frustration and attempt to push away these so called game players is also going to push away the quality this person is actually seeking.

So.. what are your thoughts when you see words like this?

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RE: Frustration? or is it more? - 3/18/2007 9:34:27 PM

cloudboy

Posts: 7306
Joined: 12/14/2005
Status: offline

quote:

"If you can't give Me what I want, if you can't take Me wanting/demanding your obedience, devotion, and masochism, then go away. This is for Me, not you"

O, a phrase like that is like honey before the bees.

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RE: Frustration? or is it more? - 3/18/2007 10:43:09 PM

Vendaval

Posts: 10297
Joined: 1/15/2005
Status: offline

I am fine with the first sentence. It is direct and to the point.
But the "This is for Me, not you," line indicates a certain
bitterness and lack of being approachable or welcoming.

quote:

ORIGINAL: KnightofMists
"If you can't give Me what I want, if you can't take Me wanting/demanding your obedience, devotion, and masochism, then go away. This is for Me, not you"

_____________________________

"Beware, the woods at night, beware the lunar light.
So in this gray haze we'll be meating again, and on that
great day, I will tease you all the same."
"WOLF MOON", OCTOBER RUST, TYPE O NEGATIVE

http://KinkMeet.co.uk

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RE: Frustration? or is it more? - 3/18/2007 11:51:28 PM

KennelDeSade2

Posts: 210
Joined: 9/19/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: KnightofMists
I can't help but wonder if this person's frustration and attempt to push away these so called game players is also going to push away the quality this person is actually seeking.

Without question, yes, it will. Your words are the only thing that somebody looking at you for the first time has to judge you by. If you can't control your emotions and feelings enough to express yourself without bitterness and rancor in an online post or profile, there is not much hope to ask for more in real time when you don't have the backspace key at hand.

_____________________________

Rules? Just one: I say, she does.
Everything else, is just details.

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RE: Frustration? or is it more? - 3/19/2007 7:16:55 AM

Padriag

Posts: 2633
Joined: 3/30/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: KnightofMists

The following is what caught my attention.

"If you can't give Me what I want, if you can't take Me wanting/demanding your obedience, devotion, and masochism, then go away. This is for Me, not you"

I can't help but wonder if this person's frustration and attempt to push away these so called game players is also going to push away the quality this person is actually seeking.

So.. what are your thoughts when you see words like this?

My first thought is that someone was feeling a bit overwhelmed and frustrated with things when they wrote that. You said it was in a journal entry, those are often written as "thoughts of the moment". If it were the profile of someone I were interested in I'd read their overall profile, their other journal entries and see if I could get a better "picture" of them, and also of whether this was a single incident of "having a bad day" or a pattern of negativity. We all have bad days, say things we later regret, I'm not inclined to hold one brief statement against someone. Smart people sometimes do stupid things, wisemen are sometimes foolish, Hank Arron still occasionally struck out... no one is perfect. Maybe that's all it was, someone having one of those days when the silly emails, the spam, the nonsense and all the rest that goes on around here just got to be too much. Being that it was a journal entry, I'd check back later and see if they cheered up. If its been their pattern to be more positive in the past, I very much suspect they return to that in the near future.

As for scaring people off... sometimes that's a bit of a crap shoot. Sometimes people deliberately try to get a bit tough in their profile in order to discourage the wannabe's or at least to make it clear to those who are serious that they are also serious. The problem being it doesn't always come across as intended, and the ones they'd like to scare off often still don't bother reading what they wrote and email them anyway. Block, delete, ignore... has to be the most used feature on the site! LOL Which while true, is kinda sad when you stop and think about it.

_____________________________

Padriag

A stern discipline pervades all nature, which is a little cruel so that it may be very kind - Edmund Spencer

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RE: Frustration? or is it more? - 3/19/2007 7:44:59 AM

CreativeDominant

Posts: 11032
Joined: 3/11/2006
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Given that it is part of a journal entry, I would say that the frustration had been building for awhile and the "cork came out of the bottle".

The line "this is for Me and not you" is extremely negative...I know that were I submissive, I would turn away from any dominant who stated that in his profile; as a journal entry it comes across as just as negative but also as more a temporary explosion of feeling. I would read other journal entries to see whether this was an ongoing feeling or, as felt, a temporary rant.

We all get frustrated at times. I've expressed on these boards before my own frustrations with submissives who seem to want the "ABC proof" of your dominance before they will give a sliver of submission ; there are other submissive types and dominant types that arouse a differing type of frustration. However, if you are going to come to an open forum and be open to communication with all and join in on the message boards, you are going to expose yourself to all kinds of people with all kinds of thought processes and sometimes, you are going to be contacted by others who do not view things the same way you do. In searching for a partner, you are going to deal with those sometimes who, as you come to know them, become frustrating at the worst possible times...just when you are beginning to like everything else about them, along comes a thought process that had not been introduced into the conversation before and all of a sudden, you are dealing with something that does not shade them in the best way for what it is you want.

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Post #: 47