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RE: Subs made to lose weight - 3/2/2007 3:17:36 PM   
juliaoceania


Posts: 21383
Joined: 4/19/2006
From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
Status: offline
quote:

 have never had a Dom who "made" me diet or lose weight. I have had a few that tried to help me along the way, which I appreciated.

To be honest, I am not sure if I would begin to resent someone who "forced" me to diet because it was what they wanted.

I would like the help of being kept motivated, but not the fear that if I failed at lossing the weight that I wouldn't be good enough to keep as the persons submissive.



I gained weight after I hooked up with my Daddy. He was concerned about this because he saw some of his patterns in my eating. I was craving carbs, I would get tired easily, I needed sugar to boost my blood sugar levels... in other words, he saw me heading toward a bad place and he kept talking to me about it. He wants me to be healthy. He would not mind a few extra pounds as long as I can keep up with him.

I weigh less than when we first met because I went on South Beach and stabilized my blood sugar. He did help me realize it was about that, not about being skinny. I am losing weight without really trying, and I do not crave sugar anymore the way I used to... and I think that if a dominant wants a submissive to change something for her health that she should at least be able to stand back and try to look at the dom's points. If diet and exercise are not something a sub wants altered, then she should be upfront in the beginning that she has no intention of being guided and directed this way. I did not put that limit on him... and I am grateful and thankful he cared enough to recognize I may have been headed for diabetes because it runs in my family

_____________________________

Once you label me, you negate me ~ Soren Kierkegaard

Reality has a well known Liberal Bias ~ Stephen Colbert

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(in reply to swtrayn)
Profile   Post #: 21
RE: Subs made to lose weight - 3/2/2007 3:50:04 PM   
Hime


Posts: 149
Joined: 10/31/2006
From: Vegas
Status: offline 		Moki1984  I sent you a PM.

(in reply to moki1984)
Profile   Post #: 22
RE: Subs made to lose weight - 3/2/2007 4:32:39 PM   
lighthearted


Posts: 1165
Joined: 11/26/2006
Status: offline 		Moki, I don't know how long you've been toting the post-partum weight, but that whole "one year up and one year down" crapola never worked for me...it was more like a year and a half down, the 2nd time around.  my point is, don't try and conform to someone else's ideal of how long it should take to lose the weight.

BUT...taking care of your body is always important, as you know.  what worked for me was asking Master to hold me accountable for the behaviors I engage in that I know are triggers/bad:  alchohol and sweets.  it's more difficult than I thought, and honestly, at first I wasn't taking it seriously.  I always had some sort of excuse, but the ultimate was, one night I was out and all of a sudden, the next thing ya know, I'd had two drinks and 5 shots, lol...

it was only when he pointed out that I wasn't being respectful of him by not taking our agreement seriously did it become easier, because he was correct.  my punishment, btw, for my transgression, was...sushi.  I HATE sushi.  and yet, that night, I ate it.  I nearly projectiled in the restaurant , but, lesson learned...

_____________________________

"Thou art to me a delicious torment." - Ralph Waldo Emerson

(in reply to moki1984)
Profile   Post #: 23
RE: Subs made to lose weight - 3/2/2007 4:53:00 PM   
sharainks


Posts: 499
Joined: 12/13/2004
Status: offline 		Here's what I have seen.  It is only a select few whose bodies return to the pre-pregancy state.  People can talk all they want about post baby tummies.  People can talk about exercise, diet etc but the honest truth is that a baby pushes the tummy. muscles out  to such a point that few women can totally get back where they were.  Then there is the fact that the skin is also never quite as tight there as it was pre-pregancy.  Combine the pushed out muscles and the looser skin and most women are never really taut there again short of surgery.


(in reply to lighthearted)
Profile   Post #: 24
RE: Subs made to lose weight - 3/2/2007 5:00:11 PM   
Devilslilsister


Posts: 1262
Joined: 8/3/2006
Status: offline 		Odd, i had no problem with the post partum tummy.  Of course i was younger with my first pregnancy.  Might have an effect with the body being able to bounce back in shape.  It did take me about a year to drop the last 10 lbs. 

Master used to have me do crunches about a year ago.  Except i'm abit of a freak about my weight as it is.  Being pregnant is driving me nuts.  I can not jump on my trampoline, i can not go running, i dont even want to go for a walk in the woods, i'm too lazy/tired to do small exercises, and going and doing all out aerobic exercises is beyond me. 

People have alot of self destructive behaviors.. over eating... not taking care of self.......  channel those "self abuse" behaviors into working out so hard at the gym that you just want to fall over.  Feels great - good for you!

LOL


_____________________________

My ability to cope with BS is at an all time low - me

i may look like i'm doing nothing, but i'm very busy at a cellular level

(in reply to sharainks)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: Subs made to lose weight - 3/2/2007 7:43:22 PM   
swtrayn


Posts: 222
Joined: 2/21/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: juliaoceania

quote:

 have never had a Dom who "made" me diet or lose weight. I have had a few that tried to help me along the way, which I appreciated.

To be honest, I am not sure if I would begin to resent someone who "forced" me to diet because it was what they wanted.

I would like the help of being kept motivated, but not the fear that if I failed at lossing the weight that I wouldn't be good enough to keep as the persons submissive.



I gained weight after I hooked up with my Daddy. He was concerned about this because he saw some of his patterns in my eating. I was craving carbs, I would get tired easily, I needed sugar to boost my blood sugar levels... in other words, he saw me heading toward a bad place and he kept talking to me about it. He wants me to be healthy. He would not mind a few extra pounds as long as I can keep up with him.

I weigh less than when we first met because I went on South Beach and stabilized my blood sugar. He did help me realize it was about that, not about being skinny. I am losing weight without really trying, and I do not crave sugar anymore the way I used to... and I think that if a dominant wants a submissive to change something for her health that she should at least be able to stand back and try to look at the dom's points. If diet and exercise are not something a sub wants altered, then she should be upfront in the beginning that she has no intention of being guided and directed this way. I did not put that limit on him... and I am grateful and thankful he cared enough to recognize I may have been headed for diabetes because it runs in my family



With reading what you wrote, I see that He did it to help you be more healthy. I didn't see that He 'forced' you, which is what I was trying to get at. I think it is wonderful that He talked to you about it and helped you along the way. To me that shows alot in a person.

My issue is not about a Dom who wants to help and even encourage a sub to become healthier.

My issue is with a Dom pretty much "ordering" someone to drop weight.

I know for me personally, I am not going to drop weight until I am ready to. But, I also know, that having someone there to encourage me and help me along the way will only make my chances of success sooooo much better :)

So, to me there is a difference between helping and encouraging and out and out ordering someone to drop weight.


rayn



_____________________________

"I tried to contain myself -- I escaped..."

"Make sure brain is engaged before SEND key is released"

"Once in his life, every man is entitled to fall madly in love with a gorgeous redhead."--Lucille Ball


(in reply to juliaoceania)
Profile   Post #: 26
RE: Subs made to lose weight - 3/2/2007 7:50:20 PM   
behindmirrors


Posts: 340
Joined: 8/5/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: moki1984

odd question here..or maybe not so odd. i know some doms make their subs maintain a healthier lifestyle thru eating better, working out...i have read some posts here regarding this. so i was wondering...i am seperated from my husband for 5 months but i do feel in my quest to please him in all aspects I should take good care of my body even while he is away. I have what you may refer to as post partum weight still.......im sure some of you know that. Have you ever had a dom who made you do certian things exercise wise or eating wise that helped you tone your abdomen and possibly shed that hehe. I eat healthy but still,being preg. that does something to your body. So any suggestions lol, I will take them. Thanks


I agree with all that has been said about eating lots of fresh veggies and healthy foods, and drinking water- and also making sure you do something to stay active every day. The key is to be doing things that motivate you, and keep you happy- not things that feel like "punishment" to do for exercise. For me, running or going to the gym is akin to "punishment" for me- I can't stand being on a treadmill, or the fact that the local gym here seems like a meat-market.
Why not try something like belly dancing? It's a great ab workout, it's sexy, it's a new, pleasing skill to learn (and you can surprise him with a nice dance when he comes back!), and even if you don't loose the little tummy, you will have new respect for how beautiful it is when dancing. Classes are also becoming pretty common, so you might be able to find one nearby- otherwise, a tape in the privacy of your own home can work, too. Or, since it's winter, you could try an ice skating class- another good full-body sort of thing that can be really fun.
I dunno- personally, no matter who is doing the ordering (and it's not my Dom, haha- I'm actually trying to help him get into better shape *grins*), I can't find the motivation to work out because I "should"- but doing something fun and getting exercise at the same time is key.

Hope this helps-
behindmirrors.

<Edited to include that if you are craving salt, you could see if you have a vitamin B6 deficiency. It's pretty common, and it tends to add to abdominal weight or help keep it there longer. I had that happen a few years ago, so it might be something to get checked if you think that might help.>

< Message edited by behindmirrors -- 3/2/2007 7:52:56 PM >

(in reply to moki1984)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: Subs made to lose weight - 3/2/2007 8:30:23 PM   
swtrayn


Posts: 222
Joined: 2/21/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: behindmirrors




Why not try something like belly dancing? It's a great ab workout, it's sexy, it's a new, pleasing skill to learn (and you can surprise him with a nice dance when he comes back!), and even if you don't loose the little tummy, you will have new respect for how beautiful it is when dancing. Classes are also becoming pretty common, so you might be able to find one nearby- otherwise, a tape in the privacy of your own home can work, too. Hope this helps-
behindmirrors.



I am very glad you brought up Belly Dancing, it is in my opinion a very  fun way to get healthier and drop weight.
I have used a few different Belly Dancing DVDs.. and I have to say my favorites are by
Neena & Veena Bidasha -(They have a series out for beginners.) Bellydance Fitness for Beginners.
 They have ones for the abs the arms the butt.. so forth so on.
They are alot of fun, can I stress fun enough?? and they work.

I dropped inches and lbs. (As a matter of fact I think I shall pull them out and start doing them again tomorrow... (smiles)

Just wanted to share a series that I enjoyed.


rayn


_____________________________

"I tried to contain myself -- I escaped..."

"Make sure brain is engaged before SEND key is released"

"Once in his life, every man is entitled to fall madly in love with a gorgeous redhead."--Lucille Ball


(in reply to behindmirrors)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: Subs made to lose weight - 3/2/2007 10:56:59 PM   
JLION


Posts: 25
Joined: 2/21/2007
Status: offline 		I know that if I have a sub, no matter how fit she is I will require that she exercises and eats healthy. Nutrition and exercise is one of my biggest interests, and I believe eating healthy and exercise is something you will eventually become addicted to and crave with enough practice. As a dom, I want to be a personal trainer and dietician, but have more authoritarian power than most trainers and dieticians have. For advice on nutrition, I suggest reading anything from "The Zone" series. In my opinion, and in the opinion of many MDs, the Zone Diet is one of the best "popular" diets out there. I do have to admit, it is somewhat complicated to follow if you are not used to it. The South Beach Diet, The GI Diet, and the Abs Diet are all good too. If you study those books, you will notice that there are many common denominators. As far as exercise goes, I recommend that you find an activity that works well for you. Remember to never try to lose more than 1 or 2 pounds a week, and incorporate weight training. Otherwise you will have "loose skin" problems, and some overall flabbiness. By the way, I think it would be kind of erotic to watch a sub walk on a treadmill naked (with shoes on) for a period of time. I think the thought of a naked sub sweating while walking on a treadmill is very sexy to me for some reason (and probably humiliating for the sub). . 

(in reply to moki1984)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: Subs made to lose weight - 3/5/2007 5:10:58 PM   
servicewithsmile


Posts: 55
Joined: 2/6/2007
Status: offline 		Yah, I'm fat.
No, I'm not happy about it.
and Yes, the couple I'm going to live with soon have vowed to consistently work with me on it.
If I have amazing before and after pics, I promise to post them at the end of the summer. (grin)
And no, I would never go to a Dom that didn't take it seriously and help me daily with the discipline that changing one's eating and exercise habits requires.

(in reply to JLION)
Profile   Post #: 30
RE: Subs made to lose weight - 3/5/2007 5:15:28 PM   
swtrayn


Posts: 222
Joined: 2/21/2007
Status: offline 		I wish you much happiness and good luck.

Look forward to the before and after pictures :)


rayn


_____________________________

"I tried to contain myself -- I escaped..."

"Make sure brain is engaged before SEND key is released"

"Once in his life, every man is entitled to fall madly in love with a gorgeous redhead."--Lucille Ball


(in reply to servicewithsmile)
Profile   Post #: 31
RE: Subs made to lose weight - 3/5/2007 5:22:48 PM   
CrazyC


Posts: 949
Joined: 9/28/2006
Status: offline 		i'd add bellydancing. :) The isolation moves really help to tone.

_____________________________

"You never lose by loving. You always lose by holding back." Barbara De Angelis

(in reply to moki1984)
Profile   Post #: 32
RE: Subs made to lose weight - 3/5/2007 5:37:24 PM   
misspage


Posts: 14
Joined: 2/4/2007
Status: offline 		I have never had a dominant tell me that i had to loose weight to remain in the relationship and i doubt i would have taken very kindly too it.  I've been big almost all my life but i finally relized that i had to make some changes for my health or i might not be around another ten years to enjoy life.  I still have a long way to go but the progress is astounding and has given me a self confidance i never had.  We can all do more to make ourselves more healthy but in my opinion i think it has to be about self, not someone else or it's doomed to fail from go... or there is the chance for resentment.

(in reply to CrazyC)
Profile   Post #: 33
RE: Subs made to lose weight - 3/5/2007 6:00:14 PM   
FukinTroll


Posts: 6277
Joined: 2/6/2007
From: Under a bridge
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: moki1984

odd question here..or maybe not so odd. i know some doms make their subs maintain a healthier lifestyle thru eating better, working out...i have read some posts here regarding this. so i was wondering...i am seperated from my husband for 5 months but i do feel in my quest to please him in all aspects I should take good care of my body even while he is away. I have what you may refer to as post partum weight still.......im sure some of you know that. Have you ever had a dom who made you do certian things exercise wise or eating wise that helped you tone your abdomen and possibly shed that hehe. I eat healthy but still,being preg. that does something to your body. So any suggestions lol, I will take them. Thanks


She will lose weight do to the lifestyle she will have with me. Hard work makes lean muscle. I'm not saying princess slaves are not welcome, however you are not at the King and Queens castle anymore. You are in the evil despots world. 

_____________________________

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The Mods have me on speed Spank!! Gotta luv'em.

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Profile   Post #: 34
RE: Subs made to lose weight - 3/5/2007 11:32:52 PM   
m1top


Posts: 5
Joined: 9/17/2005
Status: offline 		I have found that some subs really want to lose weight but lack the will power to stick to an exersise regime, I find the motivation to influence their willpower. It doesn't always work but then again it never hurts to try.

(in reply to moki1984)
Profile   Post #: 35
RE: Subs made to lose weight - 3/6/2007 2:12:10 AM   
lucyn


Posts: 5
Joined: 1/18/2007
Status: offline 		I have found that since I stopped smoking and exercising regally I feel so much better.

I did not have weight to loose as such, I wanted to be healthier, and now with a healthy diet I have noticed a lot of difference in how I feel about myself.


(in reply to moki1984)
Profile   Post #: 36
RE: Subs made to lose weight - 3/6/2007 3:02:38 AM   
julietsierra


Posts: 1841
Joined: 9/26/2004
Status: offline 		I'm the kind of person that weight loss people hate. They tell me "You have to do this for yourself" and I cringe. They tell me "no one can make someone else lose weight, they have to want to" and while I see their point, they're not entirely correct.

I used to go to weight watchers. Now that organization is touted as being WONDERFUL and for many, it is. For me, it's a nightmare. There are far far far too many choices and well, that's not a good thing for me.

So, this past June, my Master said "you're going to lose weight this year. You've tried before and well, there's no more dicking around. This year, you're going to do it."

It took me till August to realise something I should have known about myself all along.

I do NOT do things for myself well at all. When I do things for other people though, I am very successful. I don't do well at cleaning my house just because I like it clean (there are other things more important), I don't like cooking dinner if it's just for myself, I don't do well at pretty much anything if the only reason I'm doing it is for myself.

On the other hand, if I do things for others, they get done. Company coming over? House is cleaned in a jiffy. People staying for dinner? I love to cook. So, having him tell me I am going to be doing this because he said so was just the ticket for me.

Then I took care of my issue with too many choices. I looked at myself, who I am and what I revel in, and decided to lose weight in the same manner. I don't do well making my own decisions. I am however, an excellent follower. So, instead of weight watchers who so kindly give me all these choices so I can be in charge of my own eating, I started eating according to the Scarsdale Diet.

The Scarsdale Diet tells me what I'm going to eat at what meal on what day. It's easily adapted to going out to dinner, so my entertainment hasn't suffered. It offers more diversity in food choices than I've ever had before, but according to a strict regimin. Lots of fruits, vegetables, meats and a lower amount of carbohydrates.

To date, I've lost 30 pounds, done so slowly, plateaued, lost some more, etc...but more importantly, I've kept off what I've lost AND I've never felt healthier.

And even MORE importantly, this past weekend, I took two huge bags of clothes size 18 & 20 to the Salvation Army and the size 16s are soon to be going there too. I'm just waiting for a little more time to pass before I get rid of those too. These days, I'm more often than not, in size 14s.

Oh, I do have to say that since June, my Master has never brought up the weight issue again. We have the kind of relationship where he says what will happen and either I submit or not. If not, he'll be on his way. So once he said what he said, he never had to utter another word and I never had to deal  with possible resentment over punishments and things like that.

Just my success story.

juliet

(in reply to lucyn)
Profile   Post #: 37
RE: Subs made to lose weight - 3/6/2007 7:31:31 AM   
SimplyMichael


Posts: 7229
Joined: 1/7/2007
Status: offline 		If you find yourself stuck with one of those big fat porkers, don't worry, it's easy to fix em up.  Add more stress, more anxiety, more pressure, and make them insecure about their body, your interest in them, and the relationship as a whole and believe me, the weight will just fall off!

I mean, the cows are fat because they have never ever tried to diet, everybody is WAY too polite and never mentioned how much prettier they would be if they were thinner, and so you can charge right in there like a bull in a china shop and really make a difference.

Only a sucker would ignore it and concentrate instead on making them feel happy and secure or let them top from the bottom with that whole "why the fuck should I diet, Mr. sparetire Dom?"  Only a tool and a manipulative bastard would go behind their backs and use some kind of reverse phsychology and simply lose weight yourself and simply order and buy better food for both of you.   That sort of slow lazy path would take forever and the bitch would never see how dominant you are without you making a huge deal out of it.

Nope, much better to rub their noses in it every day, perhaps beat them or do some of the creative punishments that everyone is so clever at comming up with.

(in reply to julietsierra)
Profile   Post #: 38
RE: Subs made to lose weight - 3/6/2007 7:34:44 AM   
AquaticSub


Posts: 14867
Joined: 12/27/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: SimplyMichael

If you find yourself stuck with one of those big fat porkers, don't worry, it's easy to fix em up.  Add more stress, more anxiety, more pressure, and make them insecure about their body, your interest in them, and the relationship as a whole and believe me, the weight will just fall off!

I mean, the cows are fat because they have never ever tried to diet, everybody is WAY too polite and never mentioned how much prettier they would be if they were thinner, and so you can charge right in there like a bull in a china shop and really make a difference.

Only a sucker would ignore it and concentrate instead on making them feel happy and secure or let them top from the bottom with that whole "why the fuck should I diet, Mr. sparetire Dom?"  Only a tool and a manipulative bastard would go behind their backs and use some kind of reverse phsychology and simply lose weight yourself and simply order and buy better food for both of you.   That sort of slow lazy path would take forever and the bitch would never see how dominant you are without you making a huge deal out of it.

Nope, much better to rub their noses in it every day, perhaps beat them or do some of the creative punishments that everyone is so clever at comming up with.


Have you been taking lessons from my mother?

_____________________________

Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

Member:Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair

(in reply to SimplyMichael)
Profile   Post #: 39
RE: Subs made to lose weight - 3/6/2007 7:50:39 AM   
ownedgirlie


Posts: 9184
Joined: 2/5/2006
Status: offline 		I related to your post very much, Juliet.  My weight has gone up and down throughout my life, and is so sensitively connected to what I eat.  I can drink a glass of milk tonight, and tomorrow I will be 2 pounds heavier - it is that obvious for me.  My Master gave me his edict in January:  "I have successfully reshaped your mind, now it's time to reshape your body."  I am required to get into shape.  As soon as he required it the struggle was over.  I've lost 20 pounds in 2 months and still going.  We're both enjoying watching my body return to its natural shape and size and I'm just thrilled about it.  It is true that everything I do is for him, so this is no different.  I am grateful for his direction.  And this isn't about just looking better, either.  Diabetes runs in my family; he does not want me to fall into that statistic.

Congratulations on your 30, by the way.  It's awesome to dump those clothes, isn't it?!?

(in reply to julietsierra)
Profile   Post #: 40
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