RE: how do you tame a wild sub? (Full Version)

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Dustyn -> RE: how do you tame a wild sub? (5/7/2006 5:34:20 PM)

And that is the key difference...  if you didn't want to, you wouldn't, pure and simple... and nothing will convince you to do otherwise if you don't want to...

- Dustyn

quote:

...i don't submit because i have to, i submit because i want to...




CrappyDom -> RE: how do you tame a wild sub? (5/7/2006 5:52:25 PM)

As long as the dominate is at least a class 7 or higher or has purple level master's belt, he should be able to tame even a wild class 12 submissives.

Either that or you have to evaluate why the person is being wild.  If you get off on saying "I have yet to meet the man who can tame me" as a way of shitting on all men and playing passive aggressive, then yes, you are not going to be "tamed" . 

By playing this game you get four bonus points

  • You are a "better" submissive than all others
  • No woman has a better man than you because you wouldn't take any of them
  • Your future partner will be perfect, great, etc
  • No hassle of actually having to do anything


If someone has the skills and experience to get under that persons skin and into their mind so they could "subdue" them why the hell would you bother.  I love strong women, but I like strong women who are true to themselves and who's actions come from a place of self knowledge that those who play the "I am too wild" game have yet to possess.  They may have high standards, they may require I work hard, they may not tolerate many mistakes, but they come from a place of integrity not BS emotional drama.

Of course, it could be the two people lack the skills to make things work, and that comes through experience watching others struggle to make things work, trying and failing yourself, and working hard at achieving self clarity.  One of the many reasons I believe "time in the scene" is invaluable.




UtopianRanger -> RE: how do you tame a wild sub? (5/7/2006 6:01:43 PM)

quote:

In business, there's something called a "cost-benefit analysis".   Originating with French engineer Jules Dupuit in the mid-1800's, a cost-benefit analysis requires taking a really close look at a project or object to see if the benefits of acquiring it (building it, developing it, etc) are going to outweigh what it's going to cost and the work involved in acquiring (building/developing) it.


Excellent post and a very prudent approach. The only thing I can say that differs, is when I see something that I truly find appealing in a potential partner, it often supercedes/outweighs a few little trouble spots that could potentially come down the road.

To Michael : There's absolutely nothing wrong with being opinionated! In fact, if women were all meek, wall flowers who only spoke when spoken to, I wouldn't want to live in this world. Now take that and reverse it - I have no doubt they feel the same way. As long as you can project your outspoken opinion in a demeanor which is both friendly and articulate, you're gonna be alright. Trust me.  Mike... sometimes I think you worry about trivial nonsense way too much.




 - R




TemptingNviceSub -> RE: how do you tame a wild sub? (5/7/2006 6:05:30 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Dustyn

And that is the key difference...  if you didn't want to, you wouldn't, pure and simple... and nothing will convince you to do otherwise if you don't want to...

- Dustyn   I agree with Dustyn..you have to want to in order for it to work.If the want is not there then it is a wrong fit.So to answer the question can a submissive be untameable then no...she/he just needs to want it to work..For every hand there is a glove....be well...Tempting

quote:

...i don't submit because i have to, i submit because i want to...





juliaoceania -> RE: how do you tame a wild sub? (5/7/2006 6:22:12 PM)

I agree with lady hugs, what is untameable to one is already domesticated to another. It really is all in how you view it. There are some that post here that are dominant that I know view me as a wannabe sub, or an uppity sub, they have more or less said so in different ways. It is not for anyone to judge but yourself. As far as having opinions and being outspoken, I am sure there are many Dommes that would see this as an attribute and not a deficit in your submissiveness to them.

I know the dominant men that I find myself most attracted to are the ones that will not intimidated by my opinions or my outspoken ways. Of course I would be different in my manner among others in the lifestyle (unless he told me not to change my ways), but I need a dom that values all of what I am. The more power I possess the more I can give to him after all. It takes quite a dominant person to shape someone that has well developed concepts about the world they live in. That is the way I see it anyways.




michaelGA2 -> RE: how do you tame a wild sub? (5/7/2006 6:24:30 PM)

i have come to the conclusion that i may be unabtainable, especially on this site, due to my outspokeness. or, in the least, unwanted or undesirable, to say the least. what Mistress wants a sub they have to "break in"?




Dustyn -> RE: how do you tame a wild sub? (5/7/2006 6:31:26 PM)

All of those pesky laws about abuse really ties the hands of those that know how to break a spirit properly... *smirk*

- Dustyn




stef -> RE: how do you tame a wild sub? (5/7/2006 6:32:54 PM)

Michael, you know that being "outspoken" has absolutely nothing to do with why you are unwanted/undesired by prospective Mistresses here.     

~stef




michaelGA2 -> RE: how do you tame a wild sub? (5/7/2006 6:35:43 PM)

perhaps i'm just too hard to handle for people here...LOL




juliaoceania -> RE: how do you tame a wild sub? (5/7/2006 6:41:05 PM)

I may be flamed for saying this, but a certain dom that I am extremely interested in pointed out to me that there are more sub males than dommes.. There are more dom males than sub females. This creates a situation where you are looking for a domme in a saturated market. That is the facts of it.... BUT even though that may be the situation there is also every possibility that who you are in your nature is the perfect fit for the right mistress that you seek. There are MANY things that we can and should change to be pleasing to the One we want to be with, there are other things that are not flaws in us, but just our nature, and I kinda think that people should not try to change the core of who they are. If you have dearly held opinions and are an outspoken person then in my opinion you should wait until you find someone that sees this as a good thing. Someone will.





hmmmmnbird -> RE: how do you tame a wild sub? (5/7/2006 6:45:25 PM)

[sorry , quoted wrong poster] I'm new to this board,,, sorry




michaelGA2 -> RE: how do you tame a wild sub? (5/7/2006 6:48:29 PM)

well, i could build up my profile by putting in everything a Mistress wants to hear, but why lie to improve my chances? i will not live with a lie. too many have already




Wulfchyld -> RE: how do you tame a wild sub? (5/7/2006 6:51:49 PM)

I would have to say at least 1 mile out in international waters.


oops, i said coastal. roflmao!




michaelGA2 -> RE: how do you tame a wild sub? (5/7/2006 6:55:26 PM)

and what does that mean? what does that have to do with anything here? hell, it doesn't even make sense.




CrappyDom -> RE: how do you tame a wild sub? (5/7/2006 7:02:18 PM)

Being an annoying ass and being outspoken only sound the same to an annoying ass, the rest of us can quite easily tell the difference.   

Oh, and Michael I wanted to thank you for making it so clear that my statement nailed this one down rather nattily.




stef -> RE: how do you tame a wild sub? (5/7/2006 7:08:44 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: michaelGA2

perhaps i'm just too hard to handle for people here...LOL

'Hard' isn't really the first word that springs to mind in this situation.

~stef




MsMacComb -> RE: how do you tame a wild sub? (5/7/2006 8:06:28 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: michaelGA2

perhaps i'm just too hard to handle for people here...LOL
 
Or to bright. [:)]




michaelGA2 -> RE: how do you tame a wild sub? (5/7/2006 8:14:01 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: MsMacComb

quote:

ORIGINAL: michaelGA2

perhaps i'm just too hard to handle for people here...LOL
 
Or to bright. [:)]


that could be also...LOL

but i thought that was a good thing [:D]




cloudboy -> RE: how do you tame a wild sub? (5/7/2006 9:37:24 PM)


Nothing like a transactional view of relationships.




MsSonnetMarwood -> RE: how do you tame a wild sub? (5/7/2006 9:47:17 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: cloudboy


Nothing like a transactional view of relationships.


Actually, it's far more about finding balance.  Alternatively, another way to word the age old question - what do you bring to the table in a potential relationship?

"Difficult" aspects of personality need to be balanced out with "positive" aspects in your estimation...if they don't, would you really want that person to be a part of your life if given the choice?




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