Zevar
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quote:
ORIGINAL: Missokyst
I have finally gotten to a point where I am considering seeking out a new mate. To that end I have been watching the population on the other side of CM and noticed a huge trend. Expectations seem to be out of whack with reality. Old overweight guys who truly think they can find a 20 something slave to do their bidding. Scrawny men that want someone to obey or face the consequences. Guys with crossed arms, mean looks, standing in front of trailer parks that demand a woman who knows her place. I don't see the logic in what they ask for or expect.
When I was younger I was always able to attract men well over my league. I would not be boasting to say that if I turned it on, I could pretty much locate a target and get him wander over to my table to ask me to dance or offer me a drink without much effort. Being a short, always sort of rounded, bespeckled female who truly enjoys the company of men has always served me well and for that I must have been blessed.
But, now I am in my 50's. Realistically I know those days are behind me and I am cool with that, I have fond memories of younger days. I am not going to lay Brad Pitt, I could not snag Orlando Bloom, or even garner the notice of Drew Cary these days. What I attract now are men of a similar (but usually younger) age, who are average to stocky in build (my preference), men who are my equal or better in intelligence, and guys that have about as much financially as do I. I am still lucky.
No part of me thinks that my 50 yr old frame is going to attract some young stud that will be willing to service my sexual or other needs. In fact, I find that idea repellent... when I think young I think dull. I know that's wrong but in my view not having a similar frame of reference is a huge deal. I like men around my age and see men in their 20's and 30's as kids. I like men who are not particularly fit, but still healthy. I like guys that aren't afraid to know less on somethings because they are comfortable knowing more about others. And I like men who have stuff, because I have stuff, people who are able to pick up and move their life easily make me nervous.
I have grown comfy with who I am and I don't care that the days of actors have passed me by. Still, I am not attracted to the guys who look like they just emerged from a party with Big Foot. Nor do I like men that look like I can pick them up and toss them across the room because truthfully, that would be my thought if they ever did something to piss me off, even if I did not do it. I still have standards but they are more realistic to what is doable at my age and stature. It is not that my standards have changed, the men of my youth fit at the time of my youth, and men I date now fit into my life now. We are similar, just as the men in my youth were similar in all but looks where they surpassed me by a mile.
My expectations now are to hope to find someone like.. me. And if I never find a mate again, I am ok with that.
On other dating sites I don't see a lot of older guys who state they prefer young women, unless they have something about them that is equal. But here on CM and other kink places I see a lot of guys that are clearly fishing in the wrong pond with the wrong bait. And yet.. many of those guys will find a newbie that will bite, otherwise this idea would not be so prevalent. I see this more in men than women and in dominants of either sex but still more men than women.
What do you consider realistic expectations for your age, sex, and life standing?
Greetings Missokyst:
I had to regain my composure after reading the stuff about the unrealistic expectations of some of us men. I laughed myself to tears. (thanks for the humor)
In reading your words I recalled the cable program “ Blue Collar TV” and I still laugh. Funny stuff. No offense toward blue collar guys at all. I just found the humor enjoyable and quite accurately illustrated by the standup comics.
I thought of the trailer park jokes and such. AND then the one where Larry the Cable guy is calling 911 and asking them for the number for 911 and then asks them to wait so he can “fetch a strawberry” so he can jot the number to 911 down on the wall with his strawberry as he yells out “ 911“ AND then he tells 911 about how his grandma is in the bathroom and stuck in her girdle and pantyhose at the same time. Hilarious. I had NO idea that I could laugh so much.
I am usually reserved when it comes to finding humor in comments about others. However I found that your words about your potential prospects funny or rather ironic in that it is realistic. I think you are 100% accurate with your analogy. As we mature be it man or woman I think that our priorities shift. I know mine have over the years. The stuff we do in our 20’s somehow fade without even knowing it fades. I say life is much better as I mature. I have learned some valuable lessons that I would not part with regardless.
Sincerely spoken all humor aside, do know that I wish you the best in your search. Draw on those years of living. I cannot imagine you have failed to learn lessons else you could not have written the words you did with gems of wisdom and reality woven throughout.
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Realistic expectations - 
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Damn, those trailer park girls are hot
and the "Stanley Kowalski" types I've known often lived in trailers. Ooooh, the animal magnetism. Give it a try
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