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RE: Demanding Jobs - 11/13/2009 5:52:36 PM   
CherokeeRose2


Posts: 36
Joined: 11/29/2008
Status: offline 		One of the important things in my "family" is the financial security of the household.   It doesn't do much good to have plenty of playtime if we're struggling to keep a roof over our heads and don't have things like good health insurance, a solid savings account, and a retirement fund. 

So we both work, and everything else works around that.  

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Profile   Post #: 21
RE: Demanding Jobs - 11/13/2009 7:04:29 PM   
MagiksSlave


Posts: 2768
Joined: 9/11/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Level


quote:

ORIGINAL: MagiksSlave

quote:

ORIGINAL: antipode

quote:

What are your thoughts?


Applies to any kind of relationship, not specifically to BDSM. Why do you ask? I don't mind answering questions, but I do like two way traffic.



I ask because, well I have a highly demanding, stressfull and draining job that I happen to love and am unwilling to give up but I know that it has the propencity to OFTEN take me out of commission as I am too tired to do anything but snuggle up and I often come home sore or injured and need of care myself!!

Thats not even figuring in all the hours I put in and the work that often gets brought home with me.

Magik


Sore and injured....... hmmmmm........bull rider? Kung Fu fighter?? Hmmm......

Yes, I'd have someone with a demanding job, as long as they could meet basic requirements.


Everybody was kung fu fighting...

LOL Level

Magik

_____________________________

If you’re going through hell keep on moving
don't slow down
if you’re scared dont show it
you might get out
before the devil even knows your there.


-Rodney Atkins-



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Profile   Post #: 22
RE: Demanding Jobs - 11/13/2009 9:13:22 PM   
Toppingfrmbottom


Posts: 6528
Joined: 6/7/2009
Status: offline 		If I was looking for a submissive, I would not no.

I understand people have to work but if you have very little time for me because your job takes up 99.9 percent of your time then sorry not interested.

Same as a sub looking for a dom, but even more so.

quote:

ORIGINAL: MagiksSlave


Okay, I have a question to ask.

Doms would you take on a sub with a demanding job knowing that it most likely means they have less time and energy to serve you?

Subs same question in reverse, would you consider a Dom with a demanding job knowing that it meant he would be taking and not really giving?

Submissives with demanding jobs may not be able to serve whenever wanted and Doms with demanding jobs will want more service, since their job is demanding they may want and demand more of their sub yet be, in some cases, unable to do all the Domly things. I could see this becoming a problem in any relationship really.

What are your thoughts?

Magik

(in reply to MagiksSlave)
Profile   Post #: 23
RE: Demanding Jobs - 11/13/2009 10:28:46 PM   
AlexandraLynch


Posts: 778
Joined: 3/24/2008
Status: offline 		I don't need to be my sub's first priority in every waking moment. But I do want to see him and spend time with him on a regular basis, time to get to know each other and to learn each other's subtle signals in play situations that lead to such beautiful synergy and transcendence.  That naturally rules out certain jobs for him, but I'm reasonably up front about that, and if I fell in love with someone in the military, well, you know, I had a trucker husband for fifteen years, I know how to cope. I'd just rather not if I don't have to.


_____________________________

I use fastreply. Don't take offence where none is meant.

Just because I'm not a bitch doesn't mean I'm not perfectly capable of making sure you'll be very sorry if you disobey.

(in reply to Toppingfrmbottom)
Profile   Post #: 24
RE: Demanding Jobs - 11/13/2009 11:02:48 PM   
masterlink65


Posts: 683
Joined: 11/3/2007
Status: offline 		my slaves work schedule is heavy and hectic. one day off here, another there. sometimes days off come in a row. a long lay over in between routes makes for more than enough time for a lunch break, but not enough time to come home.

the slaves work schedule, along with mine, has nothing to do with my domination or my slaves submission.

(in reply to MagiksSlave)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: Demanding Jobs - 11/14/2009 1:43:17 AM   
lally2


Posts: 2621
Joined: 4/16/2009
Status: offline 		demanding jobs/demanding lives its all the same and it can get in the way, badly - throw in miles separating you and there has to be a strong sense of okayness holding it all together.

the moment you get the feeling that youre life is getting in the way of harmony, speaking as a sub whose been there, the bad feelings of letting youre M down and feeling helpless about ever making it any better and that youre world is leading the relationship and by proxy you (the sub) are undermining it, it gets far too heavy - which is where the strong sense of okayness comes in.

if youre both aware of the difficulties, realities and vagaries and know deep down that youre both really trying hard to work toward some level of compromise then it depends on the people involved and how they handle obsticles and how much theyre into you and how good it all feels the rest of the time, so much dictates.

_____________________________

So all I have to do in order to serve him, is to work out exactly how improbable he is, feed that figure into the finite improbability generator, give him a fresh cup of really hot tea ... and turn him on!

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Profile   Post #: 26
RE: Demanding Jobs - 11/14/2009 8:56:59 AM   
breatheasone


Posts: 4004
Joined: 7/14/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: littlewonder

Master has a demanding life. While it's definitely not something I was looking for, it did happen and I've learned to accept it and we find ways to deal with it.

When you really want to be with someone you learn that life isn't always how you plan it. You weither learn to accept or move on.


What do you BOTH do to help stay connected?


_____________________________

Romans 10:13,For whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved.
Mike posts in black font
candy posts in pink font

(in reply to littlewonder)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: Demanding Jobs - 11/14/2009 9:10:11 AM   
littlewonder


Posts: 15659
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: breatheasone

quote:

ORIGINAL: littlewonder

Master has a demanding life. While it's definitely not something I was looking for, it did happen and I've learned to accept it and we find ways to deal with it.

When you really want to be with someone you learn that life isn't always how you plan it. You weither learn to accept or move on.


What do you BOTH do to help stay connected?



We try to see each other when we can, call and text each other when we have a moment to breathe. We let each other know we're still here and still thinking of each other. For now that's the best we can do.

(in reply to breatheasone)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: Demanding Jobs - 11/14/2009 10:42:54 AM   
Elisabella


Posts: 3939
Status: offline 		-FR-

It would depend on our relationship. If we had just met, a demanding job might very likely make it harder for us to get to know each other. If we were already in a serious relationship and planning marriage, then it would be easier to deal with because I would know he was working that demanding job *for us* and that being a provider was an inherent part of his dominance.

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Profile   Post #: 29
RE: Demanding Jobs - 11/14/2009 12:46:13 PM   
breatheasone


Posts: 4004
Joined: 7/14/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: littlewonder

quote:

ORIGINAL: breatheasone

quote:

ORIGINAL: littlewonder

Master has a demanding life. While it's definitely not something I was looking for, it did happen and I've learned to accept it and we find ways to deal with it.

When you really want to be with someone you learn that life isn't always how you plan it. You weither learn to accept or move on.


What do you BOTH do to help stay connected?



We try to see each other when we can, call and text each other when we have a moment to breathe. We let each other know we're still here and still thinking of each other. For now that's the best we can do.

Ok cool, thank you very much for responding. And i wish you continued success


_____________________________

Romans 10:13,For whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved.
Mike posts in black font
candy posts in pink font

(in reply to littlewonder)
Profile   Post #: 30
RE: Demanding Jobs - 11/14/2009 3:39:21 PM   
GYPSYMAMBO


Posts: 660
Joined: 9/26/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MagiksSlave



Doms would you take on a sub with a demanding job knowing that it most likely means they have less time and energy to serve you?

Magik


OP:
in our POLY Home "husband" #2 was a baker-chef and had to be at work at 3:30 in the am..I drove him.
He also was in school..

HE came home very tired and needed sleep at odd hours and was not  available when I would have liked.
I however weighed this out in terms of love..other skills sets he bought when available..such as the abliity to meditate with me..our TAI CHI classes..his gardening and general calming affect on the household.
so yes ...He was welcomed IN and stayed even though his job was demanding


GM

_____________________________

"Better served women will better serve the world"

** ** **

"A turd is still a turd even if it is shellaced!"

(in reply to MagiksSlave)
Profile   Post #: 31
RE: Demanding Jobs - 11/14/2009 3:40:35 PM   
subtlebutterfly


Posts: 2230
Joined: 6/15/2008
From: Not your hood
Status: offline 		I'd not give up a demanding job if it fulfilled me.
I would also not expect my partner to get a new job just because he/she got involved with me. That's just selfish.


_____________________________

~Ms. Awesomeness to YOU!~

(in reply to breatheasone)
Profile   Post #: 32
RE: Demanding Jobs - 11/14/2009 10:45:33 PM   
JoannaMaguire


Posts: 5
Joined: 5/4/2009
Status: offline 		Many of the subs I have met do have demanding jobs. I did too till I retired to become my Mistress/wifes full time sub > All of my money and property were signed over to her I trust,love and have committed my self to her fully Working hard and long times is another form of submission. So I think thats why we can submit ourself in full when the time becomes available

(in reply to MagiksSlave)
Profile   Post #: 33
RE: Demanding Jobs - 11/15/2009 1:27:13 PM   
MagiksSlave


Posts: 2768
Joined: 9/11/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: subtlebutterfly

I'd not give up a demanding job if it fulfilled me.
I would also not expect my partner to get a new job just because he/she got involved with me. That's just selfish.



This is how I feel as well. I refuse give my job up, even if the Dom was a millionare and wanted to support me, I still wouldnt. I love my job it gives me meaning but at the same time it take a lot of what I have to give so service is a bit harder.

Magik

_____________________________

If you’re going through hell keep on moving
don't slow down
if you’re scared dont show it
you might get out
before the devil even knows your there.


-Rodney Atkins-



(in reply to subtlebutterfly)
Profile   Post #: 34
RE: Demanding Jobs - 11/15/2009 2:52:02 PM   
LookieNoNookie


Posts: 12216
Joined: 8/9/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MagiksSlave


Okay, I have a question to ask.

Doms would you take on a sub with a demanding job knowing that it most likely means they have less time and energy to serve you?

Subs same question in reverse, would you consider a Dom with a demanding job knowing that it meant he would be taking and not really giving?

Submissives with demanding jobs may not be able to serve whenever wanted and Doms with demanding jobs will want more service, since their job is demanding they may want and demand more of their sub yet be, in some cases, unable to do all the Domly things. I could see this becoming a problem in any relationship really.

What are your thoughts?

Magik


I would be happy to have a Domme who could afford to take care of me in the lifestyle and splendor I've become accustomed to.

(in reply to MagiksSlave)
Profile   Post #: 35
RE: Demanding Jobs - 11/15/2009 3:07:06 PM   
blmtrsne


Posts: 201
Joined: 6/29/2004
Status: offline 		I have a husband/slave who has to work to allow me not to. In our 24/7 relation he has two jobs: to work for a living and to serve me whenever possible. There's just no way we can live without an income. Doing these two jobs is of course very demanding.

_____________________________

-- Owner of slrn733561 --

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Profile   Post #: 36
RE: Demanding Jobs - 11/15/2009 5:44:54 PM   
MagiksSlave


Posts: 2768
Joined: 9/11/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LookieNoNookie

quote:

ORIGINAL: MagiksSlave


Okay, I have a question to ask.

Doms would you take on a sub with a demanding job knowing that it most likely means they have less time and energy to serve you?

Subs same question in reverse, would you consider a Dom with a demanding job knowing that it meant he would be taking and not really giving?

Submissives with demanding jobs may not be able to serve whenever wanted and Doms with demanding jobs will want more service, since their job is demanding they may want and demand more of their sub yet be, in some cases, unable to do all the Domly things. I could see this becoming a problem in any relationship really.

What are your thoughts?

Magik


I would be happy to have a Domme who could afford to take care of me in the lifestyle and splendor I've become accustomed to.



LOL

Magik

_____________________________

If you’re going through hell keep on moving
don't slow down
if you’re scared dont show it
you might get out
before the devil even knows your there.


-Rodney Atkins-



(in reply to LookieNoNookie)
Profile   Post #: 37
RE: Demanding Jobs - 11/16/2009 1:29:55 PM   
MzMinx


Posts: 277
Joined: 12/26/2005
Status: offline 		I think it always depends on the people ,... I work a demanding job with long hours both in the office and at home and would love a submissive who enjoyed creating and sustaining a home environment and had the time and focus to do so.

But the person and our connection is the most important aspect ... I would rather have small amounts of time with a  special connection ... than hundreds of hours a week with someone who I do not resonate with. I have had submissives who where executives and others who where students... It was always their attitude and submission which drew me not their time avaliability.



(in reply to MagiksSlave)
Profile   Post #: 38
RE: Demanding Jobs - 11/16/2009 7:57:22 PM   
MagiksSlave


Posts: 2768
Joined: 9/11/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MzMinx

I think it always depends on the people ,... I work a demanding job with long hours both in the office and at home and would love a submissive who enjoyed creating and sustaining a home environment and had the time and focus to do so.

But the person and our connection is the most important aspect ... I would rather have small amounts of time with a  special connection ... than hundreds of hours a week with someone who I do not resonate with. I have had submissives who where executives and others who where students... It was always their attitude and submission which drew me not their time avaliability.





Yes but my big worry is that if there is not time there can be no relationship, I also feel like it could mess with the dinamic.

Magik

_____________________________

If you’re going through hell keep on moving
don't slow down
if you’re scared dont show it
you might get out
before the devil even knows your there.


-Rodney Atkins-



(in reply to MzMinx)
Profile   Post #: 39
RE: Demanding Jobs - 11/16/2009 8:04:43 PM   
BrokenSaint


Posts: 301
Joined: 10/30/2007
Status: offline 		Work is work. I would be more hesitant to take a sub who didn't work. I expect them to have interests outside of kink. I have a very demanding schedule myself, that rarely affords much time to spend with people. However I make time when I'm with someone. Sure that time might be 4am, and come at the expense of sleep, but if someone is important to me, I do it. I suppose I'm very understanding about demanding schedules as a result of my own.

_____________________________

In the name of progress,
In the name of madness
Drum beats faster
Crowd shouts louder
and chaos replaces order
VnV Nation - Nemesis

(in reply to MagiksSlave)
Profile   Post #: 40
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