Sub/Dom?

Collarspace Discussion Forums

Home Login Search

Sub/Dom?

View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> Sub/Dom?

Page: [1] 2 3 next > >>

Login

Message

<< Older Topic Newer Topic >>

Sub/Dom? - 9/30/2009 1:04:03 AM

ShaunG

Posts: 10
Joined: 9/28/2009
Status: offline

I have an interesting taste when it comes to BDSM women, and I wanted to know if anyone else shares this.

I'm a switch leaning dom, but I really like my subs to be on the dom side. Meaning, my fantasy is the Dominatrix bound and gagged. Like she resists it or something... I'm not really into the overly submissive women that serve you (no offense to anyone that is). It's just I like my women to be challenging, and confident... yet in the bedroom I take that away forcefully I suppose.

I think thats why I'm a switch, because I like strong dominant women, yet I also like taking that power away by force.

Does anyone relate?

Post #: 1

RE: Sub/Dom? - 9/30/2009 1:07:25 AM

RCdc

Posts: 8674
Status: offline

I would like to hope you don't get inundated with the usual 'but submissives are strong and dominant women too!' standard responses....

the.dark.

_____________________________

RC&dc

love isnt gazing into each others eyes - it's looking forward in the same direction

(in reply to ShaunG)

Post #: 2

RE: Sub/Dom? - 9/30/2009 1:11:38 AM

fadedshadow

Posts: 751
Joined: 4/27/2009
From: a place
Status: offline

i'm more of a submissive =D

_____________________________

your living nightmare

(in reply to ShaunG)

Post #: 3

RE: Sub/Dom? - 9/30/2009 1:11:56 AM

ShaunG

Posts: 10
Joined: 9/28/2009
Status: offline

I hope people don't misconstrue what I was trying to say...

I meant strong and dominant in the bedroom. I have no doubt subs can be just as confident and strong as doms.... however, in the bedroom different people play different rolls.

Let me rephrase the thesis...

Does anyone else like Doming the Dominatrix?

(in reply to RCdc)

Post #: 4

RE: Sub/Dom? - 9/30/2009 1:23:08 AM

TurboJugend

Posts: 481
Joined: 6/15/2009
Status: offline

just wondering if overly submissive excists. I know what you mean.,,but you are either submissive or not to your Owner.
Towards other you might have degrees/levels of submissiveness, but to your Owner there should be only total submission.

Perhaps you should find a female switch, that might lead to what you look for.

_____________________________

Justme696 on the otherside
- D stands for Damian....not dude

(in reply to ShaunG)

Post #: 5

RE: Sub/Dom? - 9/30/2009 2:10:35 AM

MasterFireMaam

Posts: 5587
Joined: 3/1/2006
From: Charleston, WV
Status: offline

Totally get it. I bottom for sex. My boyfriend Tops me (just the way I tell him LOL) for sex. We switch roles for straight SM. Our favorite scene is for me to flog him until he turns on me. The flogger goes flying and he grabs me and...

*sigh*

I need to buy more crappy t-shirts to have cut off of me.

Probably the funnest scene was when we grappled for the flogger. Whomever had it got to hit the other one. I managed to hang on to it 90% of the time. *chuckle*

Master Fire

PS I consider Top/bottom to be physical acts and totally different from D/s mental roles (and M/s spiritual roles). They can mix and match.

_____________________________

The power of who we are can be intoxicating. The power of who we could be is humbling.
-----
Ms Relationship Books
-----
BDSM How-To Books

(in reply to ShaunG)

Post #: 6

RE: Sub/Dom? - 9/30/2009 4:00:04 AM

DesFIP

Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline

There are dyed in the wool subs who like this too.
You're confusing passivity with power, that's a mistake.

What you are looking for is usually referred to as primal play, force play, resistance, fighting.

It's not something I can do, I'm one of those stereotypical melts when he puts his hands on me types, but a lot of people love this.
Just be prepared that if she fights back, she might just hurt you.

Edited to ask: Doesn't this get tiring? Don't you sometimes just want to go to bed, have some sex and crash?

< Message edited by DesFIP -- 9/30/2009 4:01:29 AM >

_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!

(in reply to MasterFireMaam)

Post #: 7

RE: Sub/Dom? - 9/30/2009 4:07:37 AM

ranja

Posts: 2111
Joined: 11/1/2007
Status: offline

So you switch quickly when the strong powerful woman wins the fight?

(in reply to ShaunG)

Post #: 8

RE: Sub/Dom? - 9/30/2009 4:09:04 AM

RCdc

Posts: 8674
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: ShaunG

I hope people don't misconstrue what I was trying to say...

I meant strong and dominant in the bedroom. I have no doubt subs can be just as confident and strong as doms.... however, in the bedroom different people play different rolls.

Let me rephrase the thesis...

Does anyone else like Doming the Dominatrix?

If you are talking doming, no.
However, you are being specific and mentioned the bedroom. What you seem to be describing is a topping action, not a dominant one - but I might be misunderstanding you. So I agree with MasterFireMaam.
And then my answer would be - yes.

the.dark.

_____________________________

RC&dc

love isnt gazing into each others eyes - it's looking forward in the same direction

(in reply to ShaunG)

Post #: 9

RE: Sub/Dom? - 9/30/2009 8:53:14 AM

MarcEsadrian

Posts: 852
Joined: 8/24/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: ShaunG

Let me rephrase the thesis...

Does anyone else like Doming the Dominatrix?

No. And that answer extends to those women who do not necessarily identify with being "dominas", but are willful, arrogant and subversive, nonetheless. As for actualized dominant females, I generally prefer them to be as they are; in purity they are more beautiful (to me). Of course, a girl who is entirely surrendered and actualized in her submission has an equal appeal (to me). I just don't like mixing the two, or confusing the two. For some people, it's the buzz they get out of conquering something that is a willful challenge, and that can be a mental or physical exercise (or both).

I really couldn't be bothered with the Papier-mâché hubris, psychodrama or the skeins of head games that are sure to be involved if dominating the dominant female is really what you're after.

I'm not sure, however; the thesis is still somewhat vague, especially when you use a word like "doming", which makes me think of Saint Andrews crosses and heart-shaped paddles, replete with "pull my hair and give it to me, daddy!" Now don't get me wrong; I don't think there is anything necessarily wrong with that sort of hobby / therapy—I just have a tendency to think that is not dominance, though it may be "doming".

(in reply to ShaunG)

Post #: 10

RE: Sub/Dom? - 9/30/2009 9:07:38 AM

Missokyst

Posts: 6041
Joined: 9/9/2006
Status: offline

MFM.. lol that was hot.... and very much what I enjoy as well. I love rough sex and did not always melt in his hands when he touched me. I am not a dominatrix, I am submissive; however sex becomes boring for me if there is not a change-up in the style of play.

(in reply to MarcEsadrian)

Post #: 11

RE: Sub/Dom? - 9/30/2009 9:14:49 AM

mnottertail

Posts: 60698
Joined: 11/3/2004
Status: offline

OP, you are SO NOT ALONE.

http://www.collarchat.com/m_695989/mpage_3/key_dominatrix%252Clesbian/tm.htm#698998

_____________________________

Have they not divided the prey; to every man a damsel or two? Judges 5:30

(in reply to Missokyst)

Post #: 12

RE: Sub/Dom? - 9/30/2009 9:44:46 AM

sweetsub1957

Posts: 2201
Joined: 4/28/2009
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: ShaunG

I like strong dominant women, yet I also like taking that power away by force.

Does anyone relate?

My ex-husband & I used to have this wrestling scene thing.....we would really wrestle and I would do fairly well resisting but, at the right time, then I would submit totally. We both thought it was really hot.

_____________________________

Member: Lance's Fag Hags.

"That's not just a chip on her shoulder, that's the whole potato!" ~Lady Angelika~

In lowering yourself to talking behind my back, you're perfectly positioned to kiss my ass.

An it harm none, do what ye wilt.

(in reply to ShaunG)

Post #: 13

RE: Sub/Dom? - 9/30/2009 10:12:52 AM

allthatjaz

Posts: 2878
Joined: 8/20/2008
Status: offline

MFM that was soooo hot

To the Op.... Its not at all unusual. When I was a single Domme I got plenty of interest from Doms that wanted to take me down!
Don't let anyone belittle you or make it seem that its all a bit silly and fluffy. Its no more a hobby/therapy than anything else we see on here.

My partner can take me hard but he may get hurt. It takes a bloody good man who knows what he's doing to bring me down to my knees.
Before Stephen I swore that no man would ever succeed in Dominating me. I was a Dominant, a Mistress and I was proud of that and to conquer me as he did took a lot of guts and one hell of a lot of skill.

I am still a Dominant but now I am a thousand other things too. Its a very beautiful place to be and the great thing about it is its all so real.

_____________________________

S&M (Steve and Maria) persona libre de convencionalismos

Fan of edgeplay.co.uk

(in reply to sweetsub1957)

Post #: 14

RE: Sub/Dom? - 9/30/2009 11:00:30 AM

ShaunG

Posts: 10
Joined: 9/28/2009
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP

There are dyed in the wool subs who like this too.
You're confusing passivity with power, that's a mistake.

What you are looking for is usually referred to as primal play, force play, resistance, fighting.

It's not something I can do, I'm one of those stereotypical melts when he puts his hands on me types, but a lot of people love this.
Just be prepared that if she fights back, she might just hurt you.

Edited to ask: Doesn't this get tiring? Don't you sometimes just want to go to bed, have some sex and crash?

I think the point about force play and resistance hit the nail on the head.... although what you said about just going to bed have some sex and crash sounds great. I'm not into wrestling until I bleed, I just like tough sub I guess... I'm not sure how to put it. I don't even need to incorporate BDSM into every sex session either, it's just more fun for me... I guess I need a specific kind of switch.

(in reply to DesFIP)

Post #: 15

RE: Sub/Dom? - 9/30/2009 2:32:11 PM

Acer49

Posts: 1434
Joined: 8/7/2009
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: ShaunG

I have an interesting taste when it comes to BDSM women, and I wanted to know if anyone else shares this.

I'm a switch leaning dom, but I really like my subs to be on the dom side. Meaning, my fantasy is the Dominatrix bound and gagged. Like she resists it or something... I'm not really into the overly submissive women that serve you (no offense to anyone that is). It's just I like my women to be challenging, and confident... yet in the bedroom I take that away forcefully I suppose.

I think thats why I'm a switch, because I like strong dominant women, yet I also like taking that power away by force.

Does anyone relate?

I can't say that I do. The submissives I have spoken to about this have all agreed that they do not wish to see a submissive in a position of power over a dominant, with the exception of a submissive who had lost respect of their dominant and felt it would be poetic justice. I do not see a dominant desiring to be in a submissive state.

_____________________________

Never be bullied into silence. Never allow yourself to be made a victim. Accept no one's definition of your life; define yourself.
Harvey Fierstein

(in reply to ShaunG)

Post #: 16

RE: Sub/Dom? - 9/30/2009 2:36:35 PM

leadership527

Posts: 5026
Joined: 6/2/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: ShaunG
I think thats why I'm a switch, because I like strong dominant women, yet I also like taking that power away by force.
Does anyone relate?

Nope, I can't relate either. I'm guessing because we're not much into bedroom scenes. So for me, if I was "taking a strong, dominant woman's power away by force" it would be a real act, and reprehensible to me. I prefer my submissives to be submissive and my dominants to be dominant under the "square peg/round hole" theory of life.

The closest I can get is that sometimes Carol tops in the bedroom and I bottom. But there are no illusions about who's got what authority. I'm just enjoying having a sexy little mynx pleasure me is all.

_____________________________

~Jeff

I didn't so much "enslave" Carol as I did "enlove" her. - Me
I want a joyous, loving, respectful relationship where the male is in charge and deserves to be. - DavanKael

(in reply to ShaunG)

Post #: 17

RE: Sub/Dom? - 9/30/2009 2:47:10 PM

Hierodule

Posts: 597
Joined: 9/22/2009
Status: offline

What if a dominant ORDERED his submisve to take a dominant role in a scene as a way to take her out of her comfort zone because it was completely out of character for her? Then as soon as she got comfortable with the role took it away from her by force and agessively put her back in her place? I could see this being powerful. I also just want to play devil's advocate for a second

quote:

ORIGINAL: Acer49
I can't say that I do. The submissives I have spoken to about this have all agreed that they do not wish to see a submissive in a position of power over a dominant, with the exception of a submissive who had lost respect of their dominant and felt it would be poetic justice. I do not see a dominant desiring to be in a submissive state.

(in reply to Acer49)

Post #: 18

RE: Sub/Dom? - 9/30/2009 2:47:40 PM

Lashra

Posts: 4900
Joined: 2/9/2006
Status: offline

As long as it is a mutual agreement then no worries. However I would not suggest trying to overpower a Domme in scene without an agreement first. I had a sub that pulled that and he ended up in the hospital and no he wasn't a little wimpy guy, he was quite large actually. He just found out that some women do not melt like in the books when a man tries to over power them physically, some will fight back.

~Lashra

_____________________________

“We can never judge the lives of others, because each person knows only their own pain and renunciation. It's one thing to feel that you are on the right path, but it's another to think that yours is the only path.”

(in reply to ShaunG)

Post #: 19

RE: Sub/Dom? - 9/30/2009 5:20:51 PM

MarcEsadrian

Posts: 852
Joined: 8/24/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: leadership527
I prefer my submissives to be submissive and my dominants to be dominant under the "square peg/round hole" theory of life.

Pshh. How dare you!

(in reply to leadership527)

Post #: 20

Page: [1] 2 3 next > >>

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> Sub/Dom?

Page: [1] 2 3 next > >>

Jump to:

New Messages	No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages	Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages	Locked w/o New Messages

Post New Thread

Reply to Message

Post New Poll

Submit Vote

Delete My Own Post

Delete My Own Thread

Rate Posts

Collarchat.com © 2025

Terms of Service

0.063