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Show me the Money - 7/11/2009 9:34:53 AM   
justme1980


Posts: 169
Joined: 6/20/2009
Status: offline 		We all know that the Dominants enjoys all the perks of ownership, however that also means they must take on the responsibilites as well. What is a dominants ethical and moral obligations to their slave/sub with regards to their financial security. what have you done or will you do to meet those obligations?
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: Show me the Money - 7/11/2009 9:41:00 AM   
GeorgiaMaam


Posts: 23
Joined: 5/27/2009
Status: offline 		I work to secure my own finanical future.  I require anyone I'm in a relationship with, submissive or not, to do the same for themselves.

I would not consent to financially supporting anyone fully other than my own child, and I would not consent to anyone else financially supporting me.

< Message edited by GeorgiaMaam -- 7/11/2009 9:42:05 AM >

(in reply to justme1980)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: Show me the Money - 7/11/2009 9:44:25 AM   
kyraofMists


Posts: 3292
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline 		He has put quite a few things in place:

Savings accounts in my name
Retirement account for me
My name is on the title of the house (along with his and Alandra's)
I am the beneficiary of his and Alandra's will
All our names are on the title of the vehicle
Power of Attorney
Medical Power of Attorney


These are not just for financial well-being, but for the well-being of our relationship overall.

Knight's Kyra

_____________________________

"Passion... it lies in all of us. Sleeping, waiting, and though unbidden, it will stir, open its jaws, and howl. It speaks to us, guides us... passion rules us all. And we obey..." ~Angelus

(in reply to justme1980)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: Show me the Money - 7/11/2009 10:14:43 AM   
justme1980


Posts: 169
Joined: 6/20/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: kyraofMists

He has put quite a few things in place:

Savings accounts in my name
Retirement account for me
My name is on the title of the house (along with his and Alandra's)
I am the beneficiary of his and Alandra's will
All our names are on the title of the vehicle
Power of Attorney
Medical Power of Attorney


These are not just for financial well-being, but for the well-being of our relationship overall.

Knight's Kyra


It sounds like you have yourself a very honorable man, a man deserving the title of Master

(in reply to kyraofMists)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: Show me the Money - 7/11/2009 10:29:43 AM   
Drakontos


Posts: 167
Joined: 5/20/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: justme1980

We all know that the Dominants enjoys all the perks of ownership, however that also means they must take on the responsibilites as well. What is a dominants ethical and moral obligations to their slave/sub with regards to their financial security. what have you done or will you do to meet those obligations?

It does not concern zaphira one way or the other whether or not Master has 'arranged' for this slave's future. All that concerns zaphira is the present.

_____________________________

Drakontos
zaphira

Live with honor; serve with grace and beauty

(in reply to justme1980)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: Show me the Money - 7/11/2009 10:39:50 AM   
IrishMist


Posts: 7480
Joined: 11/17/2005
Status: offline
quote:

We all know that the Dominants enjoys all the perks of ownership

Realy? I never knew that a D/s relationship was one sided only.
quote:

however that also means they must take on the responsibilites as well.

It does? Since when?

I can't remember the last time I have come across a more condescending, rude, biased, and passive-aggressive post in my life. Congratulations; you are sure to get the exact response you wanted from this.

_____________________________

If I said something to offend you, please tell me what it was so that I can say it again later.


(in reply to justme1980)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: Show me the Money - 7/11/2009 11:02:49 AM   
agirl


Posts: 4530
Joined: 6/14/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: justme1980

We all know that the Dominants enjoys all the perks of ownership, however that also means they must take on the responsibilites as well. What is a dominants ethical and moral obligations to their slave/sub with regards to their financial security. what have you done or will you do to meet those obligations?


He reminds me to sort my finances out and keep them in an orderly fashion. He fully encourages me to take care of myself financially.

The *perks* of ownership aren't even weighed in the same set of scales, for him OR for me.

agirl



(in reply to justme1980)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: Show me the Money - 7/11/2009 11:26:04 AM   
SimplyMichael


Posts: 7229
Joined: 1/7/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: justme1980

We all know that the Dominants enjoys all the perks of ownership, however that also means they must take on the responsibilites as well. What is a dominants ethical and moral obligations to their slave/sub with regards to their financial security. what have you done or will you do to meet those obligations?


Anyone else bored with the pointed  and judgmental questions?

(in reply to justme1980)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: Show me the Money - 7/11/2009 11:29:44 AM   
RedMagic1


Posts: 6470
Joined: 5/10/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: SimplyMichael

quote:

ORIGINAL: justme1980

We all know that the Dominants enjoys all the perks of ownership, however that also means they must take on the responsibilites as well. What is a dominants ethical and moral obligations to their slave/sub with regards to their financial security. what have you done or will you do to meet those obligations?


Anyone else bored with the pointed  and judgmental questions?


I've decided I won't post on the OP's threads unless she pays me tribute.  This is just a teaser, on the house.


_____________________________

Not with envy, not with a twisted heart, shall you feel superior, or go about boasting. Rather in goodness by action make true your song and your word. Thus you shall be highly regarded, and able to live in peace with all others.
- 15th century Aztec

(in reply to SimplyMichael)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: Show me the Money - 7/11/2009 11:36:08 AM   
kiwisub12


Posts: 4742
Joined: 1/11/2006
Status: offline 		As an adult, i work and save for retirement.
As a submissive, i work and save for retirement.
As a dominant, my Sirs responsibility in this endevour?   -  nil.

If he insisted that I quit work, stay at home, and at his feet, then i would enquire - politely - what arrangements were being made for my retirement - as a sensible, older individual would do. I don't want to live under a bridge when i am 80 and my Sir is dead, so i work and save.

Seems to me that if you are submissive, then you need to plan for your own retirement, decide what you need to do and do it.  Good grief - as adults, it is incumbant upon us to take care of our selves, and not put ourselves at the mercy of another (bad marraige talking here).  I'm more of an ant than a grasshopper now - although when i was younger i identified more with the grasshopper - and if i have to explain that analogy, then that is just SAD!

That's the one thing i stress to the students that come through my work place  -  start as soon as you get a job, with a savings plan for retirement. Don't do as i did and assume that your marraige will last forever and what he was saving will support you! Even if it is $10 a payperiod, save something!!!!!!  That way, you won't be a burden on others.

(in reply to agirl)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: Show me the Money - 7/11/2009 11:37:52 AM   
nephandi


Posts: 4470
Joined: 9/23/2005
From: Cold and magickal Norway in a town near Bergen!
Status: offline 		Greetings

quote:

We all know that the Dominants enjoys all the perks of ownership, however that also means they must take on the responsibilites as well. What is a dominants ethical and moral obligations to their slave/sub with regards to their financial security. what have you done or will you do to meet those obligations?


That depend entirely on the relationship in question. Why do so many newbies seam to think BDSM D/s and whatever else you got outside the norm is a club where everyone have the same rules? We are talking about individual relationships here. In some the Dom have no obligation at all, the sub make his or her own money, in others the entire economy of the sub is controlled by the Dom, and in others the Dom provides for the sub and every step in between. This is a thing that each couple, or more, have to discuss at the start of their relationship, for it is differant for everyone with not right or wrong answer.

I wish you well


_____________________________

Whatever you think you can do or believe you can do, begin it. Action has magic, grace and power in it.--Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

Futon torpedoes, make love not war!--Aswad


(in reply to justme1980)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: Show me the Money - 7/11/2009 11:43:49 AM   
agirl


Posts: 4530
Joined: 6/14/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: SimplyMichael

quote:

ORIGINAL: justme1980

We all know that the Dominants enjoys all the perks of ownership, however that also means they must take on the responsibilites as well. What is a dominants ethical and moral obligations to their slave/sub with regards to their financial security. what have you done or will you do to meet those obligations?


Anyone else bored with the pointed  and judgmental questions?



They don't seem judgemental, just a bit dopey and myopic. Nothing wrong with the question but the opening statement made me cringe a little.

agirl



(in reply to SimplyMichael)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: Show me the Money - 7/11/2009 12:00:05 PM   
Calandra


Posts: 725
Joined: 11/22/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: justme1980

We all know that the Dominants enjoys all the perks of ownership, however that also means they must take on the responsibilites as well. What is a dominants ethical and moral obligations to their slave/sub with regards to their financial security. what have you done or will you do to meet those obligations?


Unlike some people, I don't see anything rude, judgemental or condescending about your question. I guess each person perceives things from their own perspective. I was in service to a wonderful Man once who died unexpectedly, and I was left to the overwhelming task of picking up the pieces both emotionally AND financially. I have vowed that anyone who serves Me will never have that to look forward to.

All parties in My home work, however I oversee the management of the finances because I'm the Owner. Like Kyra's Master, retirement funds, saving's accounts, insurance, deeds/titles, powers of attorney, and wills are all taken care of. I also have a "diary" of sorts showing how and what I decide to spend so anyone in My home can pick up where I left off.

You mentioned "financial" security, but to give the fullest answer on the subject of providing for My household, I need to include more:
We all know who to contact concerning extended family and legal representatives.
We all know each others' wishes about funeral arrangements, care for the um in the house, and what heirlooms (owned by us all now) should go to whom to help those outside the home to grieve and let go easier.

We love each other, and to remove finances from the relationship considerations is, in MY opinion, shortsighted and wrong.

_____________________________

Lady Kathryn
Athens, Ga.
House of Phoenix

"Nothing is ever final until you're dead - and even then I'm sure God negotiates" Anjelica Huston in Everafter

(in reply to justme1980)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: Show me the Money - 7/11/2009 12:07:54 PM   
CatdeMedici


Posts: 2257
Joined: 10/20/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: justme1980


quote:

ORIGINAL: kyraofMists

He has put quite a few things in place:

Savings accounts in my name
Retirement account for me
My name is on the title of the house (along with his and Alandra's)
I am the beneficiary of his and Alandra's will
All our names are on the title of the vehicle
Power of Attorney
Medical Power of Attorney


These are not just for financial well-being, but for the well-being of our relationship overall.

Knight's Kyra


It sounds like you have yourself a very honorable man, a man deserving the title of Master



Well, though I admire how KoM has handled this, I do not--I have family assets, My assets and a child and her assets that I am not willing to expose to any extended family. While I provide shelter, food and comfort, I do not intend to support someone, they have to have an income, health and car insurance and pay their car note--I also do not take on any one who has extensive debt or bad debt--I hardly think that makes Me less a Master than KoM.
 
And btw I disagree that the perks of ownership are one sided OR that a Dominant has to be soley responsible for the submissive.

_____________________________

I am the Cat, holder of the whip and chair.

"Let's see-whips, dips, chains, chips, yep sounds like a party to Me!"

(in reply to justme1980)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: Show me the Money - 7/11/2009 12:10:43 PM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline 		Your assumption is that the dominant is wealthier than the submissive. That the submissive holds no job and has no assets.

There are submissives who are wealthier than the dominant. What then ought in your view should be put in place.

There are submissives who don't live near the dominant, there are dominants who don't want to take the sub's money. You really do need to lose that closed mind.

_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!


(in reply to CatdeMedici)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: Show me the Money - 7/11/2009 12:37:16 PM   
justme1980


Posts: 169
Joined: 6/20/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: agirl

quote:

ORIGINAL: justme1980

We all know that the Dominants enjoys all the perks of ownership, however that also means they must take on the responsibilites as well. What is a dominants ethical and moral obligations to their slave/sub with regards to their financial security. what have you done or will you do to meet those obligations?


He reminds me to sort my finances out and keep them in an orderly fashion. He fully encourages me to take care of myself financially.

The *perks* of ownership aren't even weighed in the same set of scales, for him OR for me.

agirl




I am assuming that your Master has allowed you to work and thats great so you can do that, however I would that if he decided he wanted you to stay at home, then he knows there is a trade off

(in reply to agirl)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: Show me the Money - 7/11/2009 12:37:56 PM   
Missokyst


Posts: 6041
Joined: 9/9/2006
Status: offline 		I really agree with this.  Only I will go one step further and suggest that it appears your belief is that submissives are helpless and need a caretaker!  Holy crap.. we are adults, and should be responsible for our own future.  If I was part of a couple and he wanted to buy dinner, toys, ect fine.  But I sure would not give up my job, life, world to have someone support me and expect to be taken care of when it ends.  If they do it that's great but when you enter into a relationship that requires you to be housebound instead of working it would be stupid not to have a back up plan you take care of on your own.
It honestly makes me sick to see so many people acting as if they were children in need of care.
Kyst
quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP

Your assumption is that the dominant is wealthier than the submissive. That the submissive holds no job and has no assets.

There are submissives who are wealthier than the dominant. What then ought in your view should be put in place.

There are submissives who don't live near the dominant, there are dominants who don't want to take the sub's money. You really do need to lose that closed mind.

(in reply to DesFIP)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: Show me the Money - 7/11/2009 12:45:41 PM   
justme1980


Posts: 169
Joined: 6/20/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: nephandi

Greetings

quote:

We all know that the Dominants enjoys all the perks of ownership, however that also means they must take on the responsibilites as well. What is a dominants ethical and moral obligations to their slave/sub with regards to their financial security. what have you done or will you do to meet those obligations?


That depend entirely on the relationship in question. Why do so many newbies seam to think BDSM D/s and whatever else you got outside the norm is a club where everyone have the same rules? We are talking about individual relationships here. In some the Dom have no obligation at all, the sub make his or her own money, in others the entire economy of the sub is controlled by the Dom, and in others the Dom provides for the sub and every step in between. This is a thing that each couple, or more, have to discuss at the start of their relationship, for it is differant for everyone with not right or wrong answer.

I wish you well



Longterm of course, I figured that would have been understood

(in reply to nephandi)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: Show me the Money - 7/11/2009 12:47:32 PM   
justme1980


Posts: 169
Joined: 6/20/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Missokyst

I really agree with this.  Only I will go one step further and suggest that it appears your belief is that submissives are helpless and need a caretaker!  Holy crap.. we are adults, and should be responsible for our own future.  If I was part of a couple and he wanted to buy dinner, toys, ect fine.  But I sure would not give up my job, life, world to have someone support me and expect to be taken care of when it ends.  If they do it that's great but when you enter into a relationship that requires you to be housebound instead of working it would be stupid not to have a back up plan you take care of on your own.
It honestly makes me sick to see so many people acting as if they were children in need of care.
Kyst
quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP

Your assumption is that the dominant is wealthier than the submissive. That the submissive holds no job and has no assets.

There are submissives who are wealthier than the dominant. What then ought in your view should be put in place.

There are submissives who don't live near the dominant, there are dominants who don't want to take the sub's money. You really do need to lose that closed mind.



I am saying that the Master is requiring the sub/slave be a home maker, an does not work


(in reply to Missokyst)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: Show me the Money - 7/11/2009 12:49:54 PM   
justme1980


Posts: 169
Joined: 6/20/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: justme1980

We all know that the Dominants enjoys all the perks of ownership, however that also means they must take on the responsibilites as well. What is a dominants ethical and moral obligations to their slave/sub with regards to their financial security. what have you done or will you do to meet those obligations? This is a longterm relationsip and in this case, the sub stays at home


(in reply to justme1980)
Profile   Post #: 20
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