Fetish trends (Full Version)

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MstrTiger -> Fetish trends (3/2/2009 4:43:07 PM)


Do people follow trends when it comes to fetishes? and if so how have you seen them evolve and develop? I guess these questions are better suited to older people who have been around long enough to watch things change. Though having said that even recently in the gay community there was a bareback sex fetish which at one point reached quite a height though it now seams to have taken a dramatic downturn. I also remember there was a lot of interest in vacuum beds several years ago and people do not seam to mention them much anymore. What do you think motivates these changes? the media, technology, social tolerance, the desire to explore new sensations? To what extent do you think they have played a part in the development and exploration of your own sexuality?



DavanKael -> RE: Fetish trends (3/2/2009 5:07:35 PM)

A fetish is a psychological diagnosis. 
  Davan



DesFIP -> RE: Fetish trends (3/2/2009 5:15:35 PM)

Come on Davan. How many times do you see it used to mean kink? All the time.

I would imagine that if something gets a big hype, lots of people want to try it. Like vac beds. But they're pricy and in this economy nobody's going to spend that for something they don't know they love.



LATEXBABY64 -> RE: Fetish trends (3/2/2009 5:18:27 PM)

there are trends people get in the lifestyle because it is the in thing  they do not last though  and often leave alot of hurt people behind gots to love tourist



Esstee -> RE: Fetish trends (3/2/2009 8:21:45 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: MstrTiger


Do people follow trends when it comes to fetishes? and if so how have you seen them evolve and develop?..... To what extent do you think they have played a part in the development and exploration of your own sexuality?


I've been around in this lifestyle for more than a couple of decades and I have a sort of anthropological interest in trends - so I have some social observations to make, rather than personal ones.

For many people, I think that BDSM, itself, is a passing trend, rather than a lifestyle choice.

Some of us recognize inclinations in ourselves and find ways of expressing them and then find that other people do this too and that we are part of something larger.  Others of us hear about new activities and/or ways to dress (and to get dates) and try them out. (No value judgement here; just description.) I think that people who try out something because they read about it or saw something about it on television are more likely to try out the new trends in that thing than are people who are driven to it by some sort of internal need.

I think that marginalized lifestyles go through phases: first we're invisible and no-one hears about us at all. Then we're sensationalized, and are heard about when someone is assaulted or in some way injured. Then we become merchandizing opportunities - which is the phase BDSM is at. [Kinky activities are depicted in liquor ads. A person can buy leather pants at the Gap. Fetishwear is available as Hallowe'en costumes.] Successful merchandizing means that new audiences are buying the merchandise.  People respond to clever advertising by buying things to be cool (and/or popular and/or to get laid.)

That is, merchandizing creates trends amongst people who are looking for something outside of themselves to helpl define them. Some of us find that trends help us figure out who we are. Others of us find that trends help us figure out who we're not. Others don't much notice.

I'm in that third category, I think. I don't generally hear about the trends until they've been mainstreamed. But I'm over 55, and I think trends work better on a younger demographic. 

I responded because you mentioned people who've been around a while. Is this the kind of thing you meant?





DavanKael -> RE: Fetish trends (3/2/2009 8:30:22 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP

Come on Davan. How many times do you see it used to mean kink? All the time.



Just because a word is used incorrectly doesn't mean I have to feed into it, nor will I. 
  Davan



VanessaChaland -> RE: Fetish trends (3/3/2009 12:26:32 AM)

I'm not sure if one would call the following a 'fetish' but I am sick of tattoos, tramp stamps, piercings and shaved pussies. I mean there is nothing unique, indivdual, outlandish, shocking or whatever with any of it anymore. Hasn't been for about a decade. Still every day I see someone flaunting a new tat or some sort of "body art" (lol) like its a novel thing. Whats wrong with nice clean skin, unblemished with ink, scars, metal and with a little God given hair? :)



GabrielleSlave -> RE: Fetish trends (3/3/2009 1:23:20 AM)

IMO trend setters in any way of life are the original thinkers, the trend followers lack in imagination and free thought.  This applies to everyone, in every thing, not just BDSM whether we realise it or not.  It is very difficult to be original, as most of the time, someone somewhere will have done it before. 

In this lifestyle, if what you are doing makes you happy, feels right, and feeds your soul...then even if it appears to be following a trend, it doesn't matter.  If you hear about something you have not done before and want to try it, then try it.  Feeling guilty about being seen as a sheep could prevent you from the next phase of your development and ultimately enjoyment. 

As to how it has affected Sir and me?  Well, i am still new to this (two years) and Master is alot more experienced than me.  Wwe are in an established and strong relationship and Wwe know what works for Uus so far.  However, as with all who love wiitwd, there are always going to be things that pique Oour interest and therefore want to try.  Does this make Uus sheep?  No, i don't think so.  i am not interested in trends and what 'the world and his wife' is doing; i am just interested in finding out about things that are new to me and therefore to Uus.  Is it something i know He would enjoy the thought of Uus doing?  This way, He knows what i am ready for.  If this means that my attention is caught by something 'the world and his wife' are doing, then so be it.  It will not mean that Wwe will do it just because of that, but simply because Wwe enjoy it.

Just my perspective... [:)]

gabrielle x



ranja -> RE: Fetish trends (3/3/2009 1:24:59 AM)

I second that completely VanessaChaland, i like pubes and clean skin too... but for some to shave it all off or have it doodled all over really is a very shocking and new thing to do...trendy or not...it's just a pain when people get over exited and think they have the hippest coolest way about things and have to show it all of and push it in your face, yuk...all tho i suppose some like that too...
i personally don't need a 'shock' factor at all...i am more for trying new and interesting things because they intrigue me rather than wanting to shock anybody...some new things i try are old and even very tame.



GabrielleSlave -> RE: Fetish trends (3/3/2009 2:48:11 AM)

i am clean shaven and have my Master's mark on my back.  That does not make me any less of a person or slave than someone who has hairy bits and no 'doodling'.  Variety is a wonderful thing.  It would not do if we all liked the same thing now would it?  Then everyone would be complaining about lack of originality...oh wait...that's what you were doing wasn't it?



RainydayNE -> RE: Fetish trends (3/3/2009 2:54:22 AM)

so yeah... not everybody shaves hair off to shock YOU. =p maybe... juuuuust maybe, they do it out of personal preference? =p

as far as "trends" go, some people may not even hear about something until it's caught on with enough people to make it to the remote little place they live in =p
they may form an interest and try it, and hey, they may find that they like it =p

not all trends are based out of an empty-headed need to be "one of the sheep"
some trends are popular because they're actually good =p



sirsholly -> RE: Fetish trends (3/3/2009 2:57:46 AM)

i see this in the same light as a fashion trend. i do not follow fashion trends because i am comfortable and confident with my own personal style. Perhaps a new trendy accessory tossed in here or there, but my basic style works for me and i have no intention of changing it. A fetish trend, imho, works the same. YMMV



GabrielleSlave -> RE: Fetish trends (3/3/2009 3:03:35 AM)

Precisely - do what you do because it is right for you and no one else! 



LATEXBABY64 -> RE: Fetish trends (3/3/2009 7:53:21 AM)

i agree about the tramp stamp thingy that was to funny and tats   you know when you get older it just makes someone more unattractive  it is the truth  sad



Me2009 -> RE: Fetish trends (3/3/2009 11:41:38 AM)

quote:

Still every day I see someone flaunting a new tat or some sort of "body art" (lol) like its a novel thing. Whats wrong with nice clean skin, unblemished with ink, scars, metal and with a little God given hair? :)
quote:

ORIGINAL: VanessaChaland

Well Said...... I So So agree with you.



ELUSIVE1 -> RE: Fetish trends (3/3/2009 1:18:30 PM)

I think trends tend to be geographical too-I play in Atlanta and the big thing is staples, ribbons, corsettes etc--not so much when I play in NYC..



Lynnxz -> RE: Fetish trends (3/3/2009 1:20:09 PM)

There was a slew of classes dealing with staples and such in ATL this past year, maybe that had something to do with it?





LATEXBABY64 -> RE: Fetish trends (3/3/2009 2:12:10 PM)

i thought staples was a store lol ok that was bad



ELUSIVE1 -> RE: Fetish trends (3/3/2009 4:06:29 PM)

latexbaby..i was referring to this
yes that is me



catize -> RE: Fetish trends (3/3/2009 4:31:26 PM)

I think those who have a real fetish will always find that particular object to be arousing.  Trends would indicate to me that there are a number of people who think “oh, sounds like fun, let’s try it!”  If it isn’t fun for them, or when it stops being fun, they move on to the next promoted idea. Those who have always had that fetish will continue to enjoy it and care little if ‘everyone’ is doing it or not.



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