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getting to know you - 1/30/2009 2:52:32 PM   
lateralist1


Posts: 886
Joined: 11/22/2006
Status: offline 		For those who are in a D/s relationship. How long did it take you to really get to know your partner?
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RE: getting to know you - 1/30/2009 2:53:06 PM   
T1981


Posts: 557
Joined: 12/6/2008
Status: offline 		I've been with my husband for 10 years and I'm still getting to know him....hope it never ends!

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RE: getting to know you - 1/30/2009 2:55:22 PM   
SteelofUtah


Posts: 5307
Joined: 10/2/2007
From: St George Utah
Status: offline 		In the Biblical Sense? Well our Midget was at the wedding if that tells you anything.
Mentally? Still working on it
Physically? I hope I never run out of places to be excited by on her body
Spiritually? We Share the same.

Steel

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RE: getting to know you - 1/30/2009 2:57:17 PM   
Aileen1968


Posts: 6062
Joined: 12/12/2007
From: I miss Shore, New Jersey
Status: offline 		me...eight months
him...four years

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RE: getting to know you - 1/30/2009 2:57:32 PM   
feydeplume


Posts: 935
Joined: 12/24/2008
Status: offline 		Hmm 15 years here, and there are still new things to learn about him almost everyday. But to get to know the basics of living together and getting the basic dynamic working? About 2 years i think, then a plateau for about 3 years, then a much deeper, more involved relationship grew and we became closer. Now i can finish his sentances and usually guess what he will want to drink or eat or watch to read and I can anticipate most of his whims. 

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Wait! Are those my pants?
If it has testicle or tires, it's gonna give you the fidgets.
Pretend I said something witty and laugh.

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RE: getting to know you - 1/30/2009 3:10:30 PM   
Nikitaa


Posts: 416
Joined: 1/26/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: lateralist1

For those who are in a D/s relationship. How long did it take you to really get to know your partner?


Maybe 4 months total.
When I started here at this University in New York I saw ad in a weekly paper. A guy was looking for dominatrix girlfriend. He said he would do chores and errands and kinky stuff (he did not say stuff, he was specific, but I edit). I thought "why not" so I contact him. I find out he go to my University.

We had role play sessions for 2 months and really get to know each other. He said he wanted me for dominatrix girlfriend. I said I wanted him for submissive play toy. I win debate. He is my play toy. Took about 2 more months before we really get comfortable with each other. He is so good with knowing what I desire he does not make many mistakes. I sometimes pretend he messes up so I have excuse to punish. He protest and then I punish more because he not allowed to protest.

He is my first true submissive. My last boyfriend was a submissive guy but not kinky submissive. He was just my little bitch. LOL<-----My friends called him Nikita's bitch. I did not refer to him such way.

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RE: getting to know you - 1/30/2009 3:14:50 PM   
LaTigresse


Posts: 26123
Joined: 1/15/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Aileen1968

me...eight months
him...four years


Somehow I think this is more common that many people realize.


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Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

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RE: getting to know you - 1/30/2009 3:18:51 PM   
Morniel


Posts: 60
Joined: 11/9/2007
Status: offline 		After six years? Still getting to know one another. It never ends; if it does, that means something's wrong.

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RE: getting to know you - 1/30/2009 3:28:08 PM   
lateralist1


Posts: 886
Joined: 11/22/2006
Status: offline 		Thankyou for your contributions everyone.
We read so many times of relationships that go sour because people go into them too quickly before they know the person well enough.
I have made that mistake in the past and am trying to avoid it in the future.
But maybe it just isn't possible to know someone before we commit to them.
Maybe the act of commitment helps in the getting to know one another process.

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Profile   Post #: 9
RE: getting to know you - 1/30/2009 3:46:15 PM   
feydeplume


Posts: 935
Joined: 12/24/2008
Status: offline 		Did you mean how long did we date and talk and play casually before deciding that yes this was serious? About 6 month seeing each other most days and talking a lot on days when we didn't see each other. 

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Wait! Are those my pants?
If it has testicle or tires, it's gonna give you the fidgets.
Pretend I said something witty and laugh.

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RE: getting to know you - 1/30/2009 3:47:58 PM   
sparkyRBF


Posts: 157
Joined: 2/23/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: lateralist1

Thankyou for your contributions everyone.
We read so many times of relationships that go sour because people go into them too quickly before they know the person well enough.
I have made that mistake in the past and am trying to avoid it in the future.
But maybe it just isn't possible to know someone before we commit to them.
Maybe the act of commitment helps in the getting to know one another process.


perhaps i am more the exception than the rule.  I picked up Master in a bar for a one night stand and after a day or so of stalking we haven't been apart sense. 
Seriously, i moved in after not even knowing him for a month.  everything just seem to click, and it's been 15 years of wonderful, getting to know each other, constantly courting each other, always doing the little nice things that say "i was just thinking of you and its my favorite thought" 
Sure there have been some rocky moments when i thought of packing the silverware but communication and self awareness brought us back together to decide this was worth working on. 
I have found the most happiness in always looking to please him instead of myself.. its odd how it works that way.. for us anyways.
It's important to say what is and is not your fault and be able to correct the things you can to make a better life for yourself.  
The more honest with him i was, the more honest with me he was which allowed us to open up fully to each other and really let us get to know one another.  If you keep yourself guarded behind those walls you'll be lonely.

best of luck to you and hope this helps


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Happily owned slave
of
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RE: getting to know you - 1/30/2009 3:49:58 PM   
oceanwynds


Posts: 1044
Joined: 8/24/2006
Status: offline 		Sir and I are still getting to know each other, and hope to continue to get to know him. I been in a relationship with myself for 57 years and still learning new things about me..smiles.

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RE: getting to know you - 1/30/2009 4:29:52 PM   
KnightofMists


Posts: 7149
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: lateralist1

For those who are in a D/s relationship. How long did it take you to really get to know your partner?


Since I see notice that my girls are always changing... I believe getting to know my partner is a continual process and not a destination!

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Knight of Mists

An Optimal relationship is achieved when the individuals do what is best for themselves and their relationship.

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RE: getting to know you - 1/30/2009 4:32:51 PM   
KnightofMists


Posts: 7149
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: lateralist1

But maybe it just isn't possible to know someone before we commit to them.
Maybe the act of commitment helps in the getting to know one another process.


I do believe that the act of commitment does further the depth of knowledge we learn of each other.  I also agree that we can not "Know" everything of a person before we commit.  However.. I think we can "know enough"... the question is.. how much is enough?

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Knight of Mists

An Optimal relationship is achieved when the individuals do what is best for themselves and their relationship.

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RE: getting to know you - 1/30/2009 4:34:04 PM   
Vendaval


Posts: 10297
Joined: 1/15/2005
Status: offline 		Getting to know someone deeply and intimately is a long term process as we change throughout the months and years.

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"Beware, the woods at night, beware the lunar light.
So in this gray haze we'll be meating again, and on that
great day, I will tease you all the same."
"WOLF MOON", OCTOBER RUST, TYPE O NEGATIVE


http://KinkMeet.co.uk

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Profile   Post #: 15
RE: getting to know you - 1/30/2009 5:35:33 PM   
whiteslavebitch


Posts: 479
Joined: 9/10/2007
Status: offline 		It took me about 6-8 months to know him well enough to know I wanted a M/s relationship with him. Now almost 4 years in, I am still learning new things about him.

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MasterK's whiteslavebitch

formally collared 1/30/09

"I give to you my everything, you've given me these loving wings." - DMB

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RE: getting to know you - 1/30/2009 6:00:31 PM   
IronBear


Posts: 9008
Joined: 6/19/2005
From: Beenleigh, Qld, Australia
Status: offline 		Getting to know a partnerfor me is an exciting, never ending journey


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Iron Bear

Master of Bruin Cottage

http://www.bruincottage.org

Your attitude, words & actions are yours. Take responsibility for them and the consequences they incur.

D.I.L.L.I.G.A.F.

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RE: getting to know you - 1/30/2009 10:41:27 PM   
LuckyAlbatross


Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline 		I think I got the gist in about 6 months.  It took me some months longer to stop being an idiot and fall in love and make it a serious commitment.  And yes, pile me into the still getting to know and grow together.

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RE: getting to know you - 1/31/2009 12:08:42 AM   
dreamerdreaming


Posts: 2839
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: lateralist1

Thankyou for your contributions everyone.
We read so many times of relationships that go sour because people go into them too quickly before they know the person well enough.
I have made that mistake in the past and am trying to avoid it in the future.
But maybe it just isn't possible to know someone before we commit to them.
Maybe the act of commitment helps in the getting to know one another process.


Very insightful, lateralist1!

_____________________________

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Profile   Post #: 19
RE: getting to know you - 1/31/2009 12:20:58 AM   
MaamJay


Posts: 2101
Joined: 9/2/2005
Status: offline 		It took Me 5 days of being together (after about 6 months of regular talking) to cry when I saw him off at the airport and to know that I wanted to see him again. Then We switched ... and the next 11 days spent together i served Him ... and at that point, We both knew We wanted this to work out. It was nearly a year after the first face to face when He moved to be with me 24/7 ... and it took Him 2 more years to collar me. So i guess that was the time it took to get to know each other well enough to take what for Us, is seen to be a permanent step. It would have been quicker if there hadn't been added complications of My ex-hub-not-really-sub.

However, count Us in to the people still discovering and enjoying the journey!

Maam Jay aka violet[A]
Edited cos it posted without My signature!

< Message edited by MaamJay -- 1/31/2009 12:22:31 AM >

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Life is a song ... and I love singing it! (By me!)

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