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RE: Fighting back. - 12/30/2008 4:37:20 PM   
DarkSteven


Posts: 28072
Joined: 5/2/2008
Status: offline 		miss, you may want to look into martial arts training.  you learn how to fight and how to throw a punch/kick and stop JUST short of physical contact.  In other words, you learn control.

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Profile   Post #: 21
RE: Fighting back. - 12/30/2008 4:46:17 PM   
Lynnxz


Posts: 4813
Joined: 10/3/2006
From: Atlanta
Status: offline 		Hrm. I suppose I can be a bit more free with myself because of C's build, and the simple fact that I just *don't* get upset about anything when we are just screwing around. I suppose if the sub has control and boundary issues, it might be something to be avoided.

-Lynn, who looked out the shop window and saw C pushing a firetruck with 4 flats across the gravel.

****NOM NOM NOM SEXY M-FKER*****


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RE: Fighting back. - 12/30/2008 4:55:12 PM   
ThundersCry


Posts: 892
Status: offline 		ey...
 
Nothin` wrong with a girl thats got a li1 spunk in her...at times...
 
You being defiant at times.... noooooo, it can`t be so...

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Profile   Post #: 23
RE: Fighting back. - 12/30/2008 5:06:16 PM   
kallisto


Posts: 1185
Status: offline 		I love the wrestling around (I usually wind up getting tickled and giggling and that's the end of that)   and trying to get out of restraints at times.  But to seriously think about "fighting back", that's just not something I want to do.  

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RE: Fighting back. - 12/30/2008 8:52:17 PM   
Focus50


Posts: 3962
Joined: 12/28/2004
From: Newcastle, Australia
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: IvyMorgan

The first thing I do when tied up is untie myself.  It takes a lot for me to sit still through that urge and relax into the rope.  And I *love* rope.  My head goes fuzzy when rope comes near me, but, I untie myself.

WHAT???  You can untie yourself???  *gasp*
 
Elaborating on my earlier post, if my girl were physically able to untie herself then the lesson of who controls whom would be one depressing "crash n burn" for yours truly.  lol
 
Sure, I could order her to do or not do this or that but ropes (to me) are about actually demonstrating what she can't do, dammit...!  :-)
 
Focus.

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Never underestimate the persuasive power of stupid people in large groups. <unknown>

Your food is for eating, not torturing. <my mum> (Errm, when I was a kid)

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Profile   Post #: 25
RE: Fighting back. - 12/31/2008 12:06:24 AM   
BondageBarbieX


Posts: 495
Joined: 4/1/2008
Status: offline 		This is something I would not do as I would feel very awkward and uncomfortable ever doing that but if it is something you and your Dom enjoy than go for it.

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Profile   Post #: 26
RE: Fighting back. - 12/31/2008 6:19:10 AM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Focus50

quote:

ORIGINAL: IvyMorgan

The first thing I do when tied up is untie myself.  It takes a lot for me to sit still through that urge and relax into the rope.  And I *love* rope.  My head goes fuzzy when rope comes near me, but, I untie myself.

WHAT???  You can untie yourself???  *gasp*
 
Elaborating on my earlier post, if my girl were physically able to untie herself then the lesson of who controls whom would be one depressing "crash n burn" for yours truly.  lol
 
Sure, I could order her to do or not do this or that but ropes (to me) are about actually demonstrating what she can't do, dammit...!  :-)
 
Focus.


Solution is bondage mittens or tape a pair of socks into her fists. Only those who can fold their hands to be smaller than their wrists can undo themselves. Make their hands bigger than their wrists and it isn't a problem.

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RE: Fighting back. - 12/31/2008 6:40:47 AM   
KnightofMists


Posts: 7149
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline 		I have to chuckle when people say they are afraid to hurt there Top in fighting back.  Well... I have been tripped and dropped on my ass, kicked and kneed in the groin, punched full force to the chin and other places, elbow full force to the side of the head and ribs.. bit and scratched at... and don't forget the hair pulled.  With all that  the only thing that I have every felt hurt on.. was when my hair was pulled... and it wasn't the head.. my hair.. it's fragile and sensitive hair!!!  lol   It's kinds of the running joke in our house.  I was teasing Kyra with orgasmic activity and she desperately wanted to come but couldn't manage the words.. she headed up getting a hand full of my hair and started to pull. It hurt my hair.. and it still hurts.. that spot has never been the same since!!!

The reality is that it is a risk that someone is going to get hurt.  You either accept that risk or you don't.  If you don't accept that risk.. then fighting back is going to be lame and roleplay.  But... in reality in most cases... people are not as skilled or as capable in hurting people as they think they are.  Sure there might be a bruise here or there that frankly is fuck all.  When I am talking hurt.. your going to the hospital because someone has a broken bone or an eye poked out..... otherwise it just another day of having fun!  Hell.. I have been more sore after a game of no contact hockey than I have ever been from primal play with Alandra or Kyra. 

Oh though I tease Kyra she hits like a girl... but alandra not so much.  Last May when we went to get Kyra's stuff.  Kyra's mom whispered to Kyra to remind her not to piss Alandra off "she could hurt me" as they watch Alandra toss around boxes of books like they were pillows.   My Alandra.. pretty like rose strong like ox!!! 

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RE: Fighting back. - 12/31/2008 9:21:55 AM   
missturbation


Posts: 8290
Joined: 2/12/2006
From: another planet
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quote:

Oh though I tease Kyra she hits like a girl... but alandra not so much.  Last May when we went to get Kyra's stuff.  Kyra's mom whispered to Kyra to remind her not to piss Alandra off "she could hurt me" as they watch Alandra toss around boxes of books like they were pillows.   My Alandra.. pretty like rose strong like ox!!! 


My customers say similar things when they see me moving around 11 and 22 full gallon barrels of beer around on delievery day lol. I have quite good upper body strength, comes form years of working in beer cellars as part of my job. I have twice floored a man twice my size, that is what worries me.
Thing is i'm only little height wise and not particularly big built, im chunky id say and i think i get underestimated when it comes to physical strength. Mind i guess Sir will only under estimate me once.



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RE: Fighting back. - 12/31/2008 2:42:03 PM   
KnightofMists


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Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: missturbation

 Mind i guess Sir will only under estimate me once.


If your Sir doesn't have an appreciation to your strength.. doing some just fun wrestling is a good way to gauge that strength.  I wrestle with both my girls... with Kyra... I can very easily over power her... with Alandra... well.. if I am not careful or get cocky... she would KICK MY ASS! 

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Knight of Mists

An Optimal relationship is achieved when the individuals do what is best for themselves and their relationship.

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Profile   Post #: 30
RE: Fighting back. - 12/31/2008 6:24:05 PM   
Zechriel


Posts: 308
Joined: 11/19/2007
Status: offline 		Good evening!
I too was beaten on quite a bit when I was younger. Then it went to hanging out with gang bangers then onto abusive boyfriends. I know how to fight and will cause damage so in my older years I learned to control my temper. A few times Daddy goes into Master mode and will manhandle me knowing that I will fight back. As in all out fighting, scratching, etc. He considers it a challeneg and a workout. But even afterwards, as I come down from that adrenline high, I know that Daddy will hold me and cuddle me and love me. THAT'S the difference between now and then. We can let off steam yet still know that the feelings are the same.
   It's not often that it happens cause it takes alot of energy but it does sometimes. I can only say I go into "cat mode" snarling and fighting. I guess if you really trust your Dom and know that in the end it will be okay, then start off small or for a short ride. If it still feels too weird, by all means stop. You know what you are capable of and he should know what he is capable of. Ah-ha! There is your limit...maybe. Good luck!
Love,
Zechriel 


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Profile   Post #: 31
RE: Fighting back. - 1/1/2009 5:00:14 AM   
Focus50


Posts: 3962
Joined: 12/28/2004
From: Newcastle, Australia
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP

quote:

ORIGINAL: Focus50

quote:

ORIGINAL: IvyMorgan

The first thing I do when tied up is untie myself.  It takes a lot for me to sit still through that urge and relax into the rope.  And I *love* rope.  My head goes fuzzy when rope comes near me, but, I untie myself.

WHAT???  You can untie yourself???  *gasp*
 
Elaborating on my earlier post, if my girl were physically able to untie herself then the lesson of who controls whom would be one depressing "crash n burn" for yours truly.  lol
 
Sure, I could order her to do or not do this or that but ropes (to me) are about actually demonstrating what she can't do, dammit...!  :-)
 
Focus.


Solution is bondage mittens or tape a pair of socks into her fists. Only those who can fold their hands to be smaller than their wrists can undo themselves. Make their hands bigger than their wrists and it isn't a problem.

Lol, no, that would never do....  Naked and bound female is one highly erotic sight to behold but too much or unnecessary bondage paraphernalia spoils the overall aesthetics for me.  A personal favourite is just two bits of string (or tape for longevity, ie comfort) for thumbs and big toes - you hardly know she was bound at all; she ain't goin' *anywhere* and she certainly can't untie herself.
 
But mostly there's quite a bit of personal pride involved with tying knots.  I have three basic guidelines in reaching an ideal balance.
1. First and foremost, she must be rendered utterly helpless (depending on what I'm aiming to achieve) and incapable of freeing herself, otherwise there's no real point even bothering.
 
2. Is safety & comfort - I generally want her deep in sub-space without annoying distractions from  the bondage itself.
 
3. The overall aesthetics.  I've got a bit of a perfectionist's obsessive/compulsive thing happening and I like the bondage to be functional but still neat, uncluttered and symetrical etc.  Unfortunately that occasionally makes for a pissed off sub when I undo 15-20 minutes worth of ropework and start again....  *groan* - & lol
 
Focus.

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Never underestimate the persuasive power of stupid people in large groups. <unknown>

Your food is for eating, not torturing. <my mum> (Errm, when I was a kid)

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Profile   Post #: 32
RE: Fighting back. - 1/1/2009 9:55:05 AM   
IvyMorgan


Posts: 729
Joined: 7/5/2007
From: Midlands, UK
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Focus50

quote:

ORIGINAL: IvyMorgan

The first thing I do when tied up is untie myself.  It takes a lot for me to sit still through that urge and relax into the rope.  And I *love* rope.  My head goes fuzzy when rope comes near me, but, I untie myself.

WHAT???  You can untie yourself???  *gasp*
 
Elaborating on my earlier post, if my girl were physically able to untie herself then the lesson of who controls whom would be one depressing "crash n burn" for yours truly.  lol
 
Sure, I could order her to do or not do this or that but ropes (to me) are about actually demonstrating what she can't do, dammit...!  :-)
 
Focus.
A lot of the time, I can, yes.  Sometimes it takes a little longer.  I've been left in bondage a few times, and just got up and wandered off to find what on earth was taking them so long to come back.  (plus, creeping up on someone who thinks you're tied up and making them jump is great fun).

This "must untie self, NOW" urge doesn't sit well with the "mmmmmm rope, tied up, so relaxing" urge to snuggle down into being tied someplace.  Tis a touch confusing at times.

(in reply to Focus50)
Profile   Post #: 33
RE: Fighting back. - 1/1/2009 9:57:19 AM   
IvyMorgan


Posts: 729
Joined: 7/5/2007
From: Midlands, UK
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP
Solution is bondage mittens or tape a pair of socks into her fists. Only those who can fold their hands to be smaller than their wrists can undo themselves. Make their hands bigger than their wrists and it isn't a problem.
Unless they unfasten the knots.  Then my hand/wrist size doesn't really matter, it's all about the picky ness of the fingers/teeth and wriggling.

:) 

(in reply to DesFIP)
Profile   Post #: 34
RE: Fighting back. - 1/1/2009 10:01:46 AM   
IvyMorgan


Posts: 729
Joined: 7/5/2007
From: Midlands, UK
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Focus50

3. The overall aesthetics.  I've got a bit of a perfectionist's obsessive/compulsive thing happening and I like the bondage to be functional but still neat, uncluttered and symetrical etc.  Unfortunately that occasionally makes for a pissed off sub when I undo 15-20 minutes worth of ropework and start again....  *groan* - & lol
 
Focus.
As long as you put it back again, I don't mind.  *smiles*

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Profile   Post #: 35
RE: Fighting back. - 1/1/2009 11:03:19 AM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline 		Gag, Ivy, would fix that.
But I agree with you that having him tie me up, then undo it and start it over again is a good thing. Just feeling the ropes sliding over my body is hot. The only problem I have is when he wants me to stand up while he's tying. Then I'm likely to fall over, eyes closed, just totally melted. By now he makes sure I can lean against him, the bed, the door, a post, something to help me keep my balance.

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Profile   Post #: 36
RE: Fighting back. - 1/1/2009 11:06:36 AM   
JustDarkness


Posts: 1461
Joined: 7/25/2008
Status: offline 		The only thing worrying me in a girl fighting ..is their dirty tricks.
(btw..there is no fight..when both don't participate :P ..so go for it..and enjoy it. If he wins..makes him feel victorious)

< Message edited by JustDarkness -- 1/1/2009 11:07:24 AM >

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RE: Fighting back. - 1/1/2009 1:30:01 PM   
IrishMist


Posts: 7480
Joined: 11/17/2005
Status: offline
I have always fought back; but then, this is what was expected of me. Like Mistoferin says though, I know that I can do some serious damage. My training is for one thing and one thing only…to walk away alive, no exceptions. Of course, for me, it was always a bit different in that it was never about ‘playing’ for us. When he started beating on me, it was for real and he expected me to fight back. There were never any restraints of any kind, nor was there ever a feeling of ‘let him do this, he will not hurt me’ because it simply was not true in our case. Both of us lashed out as a way of keeping our more basic feelings of violence in check by using each other as punching bags.

Despite being able to do some serious damage myself, I always knew that he was stronger, more physically able to restrain me, and he had a lot more training than I did. HE could have seriously done some horrible damage to me if he had seriously wanted to, and this I always knew.

Now a days, it is a case of retaining all control because if I let go on someone who can not match me in defensive/offensive skills, I most likely will kill them or put them in the hospital. Unlike some, I choose instead to not ‘play’ with anyone else anymore because it simply is too hard to find someone who wants that kind of intensity in a relationship. I don’t fight back because I am allowed to; I fight back because I have to.

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Profile   Post #: 38
RE: Fighting back. - 1/1/2009 9:25:36 PM   
needlesplease


Posts: 21
Joined: 8/24/2008
From: Sacramento
Status: offline 		Something magical happens when you give up fighting and give in, exhausted and scared. It's an awsome power  exchange.

I suggest getting some wrestling mats. I got mine from the gym when they bought new ones. I was cncerned about hurting my partner too. It all worked out rather nicely.

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Profile   Post #: 39
RE: Fighting back. - 1/3/2009 10:02:27 AM   
Focus50


Posts: 3962
Joined: 12/28/2004
From: Newcastle, Australia
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: IvyMorgan

I've been left in bondage a few times, and just got up and wandered off to find what on earth was taking them so long to come back. 

This is rather an interesting and insightful statement....  :-)
 
And I can certainly relate.  It's pointless to expect a sub to accept and lose herself within her (bound) predicament if she has the knowledge (even "assurance"?) that she can just free herself and wander about.  Kinda makes "bondage" a self-defeating waste of time - and I really wouldn't like that at all; neither of us would...!
 
Focus. 

_____________________________

Never underestimate the persuasive power of stupid people in large groups. <unknown>

Your food is for eating, not torturing. <my mum> (Errm, when I was a kid)

(in reply to IvyMorgan)
Profile   Post #: 40
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