RE: Knowing you're moving to a place with no bdsm (or hidden bdsm)

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RE: Knowing you're moving to a place with no bdsm (or h... - 8/13/2008 1:37:17 PM

KnightofMists

Posts: 7149
Joined: 7/29/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: akisha

I travel 5 hours or 8 hours to attend community functions when I can.

Obviously your a slow driver... it shouldn't take you any more than 4 hrs 30 mins to get to Edmonton............. are you stopping for kinky breaks???

You might have to take a drive to the Peace for a visit... Rob is suppose to come up before Christmas.. maybe a two for one visit.

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An Optimal relationship is achieved when the individuals do what is best for themselves and their relationship.

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Post #: 21

RE: Knowing you're moving to a place with no bdsm (or h... - 8/13/2008 1:44:13 PM

akisha

Posts: 2071
Joined: 6/25/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: KnightofMists

quote:

ORIGINAL: akisha

I travel 5 hours or 8 hours to attend community functions when I can.

Obviously your a slow driver... it shouldn't take you any more than 4 hrs 30 mins to get to Edmonton............. are you stopping for kinky breaks???

You might have to take a drive to the Peace for a visit... Rob is suppose to come up before Christmas.. maybe a two for one visit.

Shhhh I don't talk about the breaks

hehe But ya it's about 4.5 hours to the city.

Travel time depends on whether we are travelling with the midget or with out to be honest.

Hey that would be cool if Rob comes up this way. I was supposed to come up to PR a couple times this summer just haven't gotten there, story of my life.

We're heading back to his place in a few weeks to finish the roof and then to COPE in Sept for Allen's birthday *S* Should be fun.

< Message edited by akisha -- 8/13/2008 2:14:47 PM >

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Post #: 22

RE: Knowing you're moving to a place with no bdsm (or h... - 8/13/2008 1:50:31 PM

MamaDomme1

Posts: 377
Joined: 1/12/2008
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I tend to create a scene wherever I go. hhhmmm... let me rephrase that, If there is no BDSM community where I am located, I tend to find one, or create one.

I lived in Missouri for quite a number of years, and was never without a willing victim... erm... friend. Lots of activity in St Louis and Kansas City..... and also even in Springfield and other parts of the rural areas.

When I moved to this unknown location out in the middle of nowhere in Tennessee, it didn't take long for the community to open up. I am now training 2 Dominas that were born to be Dommes, and there is no lacking of willing subs! True, they usually have to travel a couple of hours, but it is certainly worth their time.

The very best of luck to you in your new adventure, littlesarbonn!

(in reply to littlesarbonn)

Post #: 23

RE: Knowing you're moving to a place with no bdsm (or h... - 8/13/2008 1:53:41 PM

LaTigresse

Posts: 26123
Joined: 1/15/2006
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quote:

ORIGINAL: littlesarbonn

Well, I graduated from graduate school, and of my choices where I might teach for the next year, I ended up with offers from South Korea and a university in Missouri. Yes, both are obvious hotspots of bdsm activity, known around the world. :)

So, if you discovered you were about to move to some place where the bdsm community does not exist, or is so underground that even the people participating in it don't know they're participating in it, what do you think you would do?

(this is a question more for fun than anything else...don't treat it as a complaint or a desire for sympathy or anything like that...there are enough threads of that nature)

I live in rural Iowa............ a real happening BDSM place. I don't really care because I can do my thing without worrying about impressing the masses.

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Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

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Post #: 24

RE: Knowing you're moving to a place with no bdsm (or h... - 8/13/2008 1:59:52 PM

LadyHibiscus

Posts: 27124
Joined: 8/15/2005
From: Island Of Misfit Toys
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quote:

ORIGINAL: SylvereApLeanan

quote:

ORIGINAL: littlesarbonn

I ended up with offers from South Korea and a university in Missouri. Yes, both are obvious hotspots of bdsm activity, known around the world. :)

Take the MO job. I live in MO. We're freaks.

Srsly.

MO is looking WAYYY better!

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[page 23 girl]

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Post #: 25

RE: Knowing you're moving to a place with no bdsm (or h... - 8/13/2008 2:07:26 PM

subtee

Posts: 5133
Joined: 7/26/2007
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quote:

ORIGINAL: LaTigresse

I live in rural Iowa............ a real happening BDSM place. I don't really care because I can do my thing without worrying about impressing the masses.

Thank god you didn't let on what a FREAKATHON we have going on here...our idyllic little patch of kink would be overrun with RVs and truck-loads full of the country's M/s-ers and D/s-ers, unloading their dungeons and then power-exchanging all over the countryside...

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Post #: 26

RE: Knowing you're moving to a place with no bdsm (or h... - 8/13/2008 2:31:03 PM

LaTigresse

Posts: 26123
Joined: 1/15/2006
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We can't have that. They'd flatten the corn.

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My twisted, self deprecating, sense of humour, finds alot to laugh about, in your lack of one!

Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

(in reply to subtee)

Post #: 27

RE: Knowing you're moving to a place with no bdsm (or h... - 8/13/2008 2:36:31 PM

akisha

Posts: 2071
Joined: 6/25/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LaTigresse

We can't have that. They'd flatten the corn.

Ok wierd thought here *S*

Has anyone ever tried to make a quick throw away flogger with the green corn husks?? They are big enough and the skin kinda has that grippy texture to it.

Could be an interesting sensation

Or I could be losing my mind.

lol ok end hi-jack

_____________________________

I'm confused.... No wait!!! Maybe I'm not

It's not a blonde moment! It's momentary peroxide posioning. ;)

Your pain makes me smile ~ Happy Bunny

532-095-649

(in reply to LaTigresse)

Post #: 28

RE: Knowing you're moving to a place with no bdsm (or h... - 8/13/2008 2:53:06 PM

stella41b

Posts: 4258
Joined: 10/16/2007
From: SW London (UK)
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I wouldn't go to South Korea.. I've done TEFL in Eastern Europe, have considered going further afield, but South Korea was notorious for its generous contract bonuses, e.g. $6,000 to complete a three year contract. Now you have to stop and wonder why any employer would offer you a bonus simply to complete your contract.

Also I wouldn't advise anyone getting involved in any foreign BDSM community without a fluent knowledge of the local language and a few friends.

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(in reply to akisha)

Post #: 29

RE: Knowing you're moving to a place with no bdsm (or h... - 8/13/2008 3:14:42 PM

DelightnDevotion

Posts: 45
Joined: 7/14/2008
Status: offline

--FR--

I have to second what Stella said, on both counts. I have had clients who went to South Korea to teach English and they were treated terribly once there--expected to work long hours under poor conditions and also given very poor living accomodations. They could not rely on their contract to protect them from this poor treatment, either.

Also, I've lived overseas and would never, ever, ever become involved in a BDSM community in a foreign country without being fully versed in not only the language but also the LAW. And even then I'd be very, very cautious.

Missouri is a gorgeous state---and one where I think you'd be able to enjoy the lifestyle and your profession without too much angst.

Good luck!!! Congrats on finishing up grad school.

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then you can be trusted to care for all things."
Tao Te Ching, Chapter 13

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Post #: 30

RE: Knowing you're moving to a place with no bdsm (or h... - 8/13/2008 3:20:32 PM

DesFIP

Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline

Set up a budget that allows you to travel to the nearest big city with a public scene once a month? How far is it to St. Louis or KC if you take the job in Missouri?

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Post #: 31

RE: Knowing you're moving to a place with no bdsm (or h... - 8/13/2008 3:41:26 PM

CruelDesires

Posts: 824
Joined: 11/20/2004
Status: offline

There is a very active scene here in Missouri. Just because we are in the Midwest does not mean we are all wearing bib overalls and tying our subbies to combines in between straw gatherings. Please. In the eastern part of the state by St Louis there are a few active groups as well as munches almost every other weekend and on some weekday eves as well as an active submissive group. STL3 "STL Leather and Lace" has Beat Me in St Louis every year as well as Spanksgiving. The FLOG group "Fetish Lifestyle Open Group" has a party once a month and pulls in over 100 to 150 kinky folk every time. Chicago is 5 hours away and has an excellent scene if you are willing to drive that distance. There are active groups on the west end of the state by Kansas city Mo as well as over the border in KS. The south western part of the state has a few active groups and munchs and mix and intermingle with the Oklahoma BDSM folk. The center of the state has a group in Columbia Mo and can travel west or east as it suits them. From what I've heard, there is a smaller scene even down by the Cape. I highly doubt you will have problems finding kinky folk here in the Midwest as long as you keep an open mind .

Edit> Fixed a mis-print
C-D

< Message edited by CruelDesires -- 8/13/2008 3:57:44 PM >

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(in reply to littlesarbonn)

Post #: 32

RE: Knowing you're moving to a place with no bdsm (or h... - 8/13/2008 3:53:30 PM

bipolarber

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Joined: 9/25/2004
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South Korea... humm... doesn't that ring a bell? Wasn't that the country where some kid had the flesh flayed off his back for having vandalized some cars, or something? I can only imagine what they would do to someone fromt he West who was found to be practicing BDSM...

I could be wrong.

Anyway, I moved to Arkansas from Denver about seven years ago. To say the least, it's been a mixed bag... there is virtually no scene here, and what there is is so worried about "what the neighbors will think" that they have a hard time getting even a much together. Tons of rumor mill, lots and lots of backstabbing. Althought he rest of my life here has been rather nice, I miss the parties with hundreds of like-minded pervs, the chances of finding a compatible partner or two... not a week goes by that I don't think about dropping everything ang going somewhere... anywhere... else. Like other posters, if I want to have any contact with the scene, I'm looking at a 3.5 hour drive to Memphis, or longer to OK City, or even longer to 'Nawlins.

If you are not taking a partner with you, with whom you can depend to get your needs met, I would advise you to run, not walk, away from any job offer that would take you to "Bumfuck."

(in reply to CruelDesires)

Post #: 33

RE: Knowing you're moving to a place with no bdsm (or h... - 8/13/2008 4:20:54 PM

KnightofMists

Posts: 7149
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: akisha

Hey that would be cool if Rob comes up this way. I was supposed to come up to PR a couple times this summer just haven't gotten there, story of my life.

If you get this way... let us know...... Went to COPE last weekend..... the girls are ummmm very sensitive currently.

back to the OP

I think Aakasha asks an important question for some

quote:

Unless your career gives you such fulfillment that it is more important than having romantic relationships and fulfilling friendships with likeminded people, why let it take your life in a direction that will potentially leave you isolated, lonely, unhappy?

End the end.. people are responsible for their choices. We can't always have what we want with every choice. Sometimes the choice can be very difficult because you are giving up something or percieve you giving something to have something else. In the end... a person needs to look at the pros and cons... and decide which way the scale tips. For us the move was not an easy choice for me in the beginning... but it was the right choice. In hindsight... it was actually a great choice and alot better than staying in Edmonton. I will add that sometimes as we make these decisions... there are things that we don't consider or not aware of that can influence our choices. Hopefully those things are not major things... or if they are... it's for the better.

_____________________________

Knight of Mists

An Optimal relationship is achieved when the individuals do what is best for themselves and their relationship.

(in reply to akisha)

Post #: 34

RE: Knowing you're moving to a place with no bdsm (or h... - 8/13/2008 5:38:50 PM

whiteslavebitch

Posts: 479
Joined: 9/10/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: bipolarber

South Korea... humm... doesn't that ring a bell? Wasn't that the country where some kid had the flesh flayed off his back for having vandalized some cars, or something? I can only imagine what they would do to someone fromt he West who was found to be practicing BDSM...

I could be wrong.

Actually, that was in Singapore.

Back to the subject at hand. Since you say you're fluent in Korean, It might be an interesting way to spend one year while you look into other opportunities.

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Post #: 35

RE: Knowing you're moving to a place with no bdsm (or h... - 8/13/2008 8:09:51 PM

midgetmafiosa

Posts: 195
Joined: 3/23/2008
From: Maine, and SLC, UT
Status: offline

ha. salt lake city isn't really a hotbed of inspiration. but that's ok, i think i'm more interested in unlikely and one-on-one connections anyhow.

(in reply to whiteslavebitch)

Post #: 36

RE: Knowing you're moving to a place with no bdsm (or h... - 8/13/2008 8:25:35 PM

djaleksandr

Posts: 203
Joined: 3/10/2008
Status: offline

I just moved from an area that was, on outside appearances, totally devoid of any BDSM at all. But, I found, that the academic arena is where you find the kink, and as an English major, it certainly helped me out.

Not saying I was swimming in playmates, far from it, but I certainly found a good'n here and there.

And besides, everyone loves a teacher!

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the narrowest path is always the holiest.
so walk on barefoot for me,
suffer some misery,
if you want my love.'
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(in reply to littlesarbonn)

Post #: 37

RE: Knowing you're moving to a place with no bdsm (or h... - 8/13/2008 8:34:22 PM

TreasureKY

Posts: 3032
Joined: 4/10/2007
From: Kentucky
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: CruelDesires

... Just because we are in the Midwest does not mean we are all wearing bib overalls and tying our subbies to combines in between straw gatherings ...

lol... Your words created an interesting visual.

I wonder how many here even know what a combine is?

(in reply to CruelDesires)

Post #: 38

RE: Knowing you're moving to a place with no bdsm (or h... - 8/13/2008 8:39:46 PM

impishlilhellcat

Posts: 4379
Joined: 3/26/2006
Status: offline

It'd certainly make for an interesting play session...... :P

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Post #: 39

RE: Knowing you're moving to a place with no bdsm (or h... - 8/14/2008 9:35:55 AM

anam

Posts: 13
Joined: 5/26/2005
Status: offline

quote:

Journalism and Communications majors cannot write or use grammar at all, for the most part. I don't want to come off too harsh and blatantly hypocritical, considering how many errors are in my writing on the Internet (where most of these kids read and write primarily), but when I write for my career, I edit until my eyes bleed. It's common for a recent college graduate to give me materials that are supposed to be "client ready" and have missing periods, sentence fragments, etc.

quote:

ORIGINAL: AAkasha

-----
What an intriguing conversation. Littlesarbonn, I can see why this might be a real dilemma for you. As someone trying to get some experience to weigh the significance of my own submissive yearnings (relative to career, family and geography facts in my current life), I think I understand your tension. I'm certainly in no position to start a group here. On the other hand, I take some consolation and inspiration from opinions suggesting something as fundamental as decent language usage might be so highly sought after. On that note, though, I'll add this disposable insight.

Aakasha, I would venture to say that your journalism and communications majors are not quite guilty as charged. To write without any grammar at all would be extremely hard to do. As I understand it, rules of grammar are what we can't help to use if we speak the language. Their faults, no doubt, lie in their inattention to, or lack of grasp of, usage.

Then again, I have no doubt that many on here are quite capable of eliciting non-grammatical utterances from people in your company!

Good luck in launching your career littlesarbonn and thanks for the interesting perspectives, all.

anam
(edited to remove a mis-placed comma)

< Message edited by anam -- 8/14/2008 9:38:24 AM >

(in reply to AAkasha)

Post #: 40

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