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Dominator/Dominatrix - 6/27/2008 4:35:55 AM   
Isolation


Posts: 14
Joined: 6/22/2008
Status: offline 		Reading through the profiles I have seen references to women seeking a "dominate" or a "dominant".

"Dominate" is a verb. "Dominant" is an adjective.

The masculine form of the noun is "Dominator".

The feminine form is "Dominatrix".

Thus the proper usage is to seek a "Dominator" and/or "Dominatrix".

Not that this has any earth-shaking consequences, but I thought some might find this useful.

Peace.
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RE: Dominator/Dominatrix - 6/27/2008 4:40:56 AM   
camille65


Posts: 5746
Joined: 7/11/2007
From: Austin Texas
Status: offline 		Unfortunately those that would find that information useful tend not to be the same ones that read the forums.

It is a pet peeve of many many people here.

Oh, and welcome to the forums.


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RE: Dominator/Dominatrix - 6/27/2008 4:43:28 AM   
crouchingtigress


Posts: 4387
Joined: 3/19/2006
From: Maui
Status: offline 		this is a fairly large pet peeve of many, to be honest i dont get it, but i commend you for handling it in a mature way and not ranting.
 
just as an aside though....in this lifestyle many folks use dominant as a noun and a verb.
 
ie "she is my dominant", is perfectly normal usage....dominate however, your observation was spot on.

i cant comment on dominator, i have never heard that word in circulation.

*looks at camilles post.....and askes where are my manners*......welcome to the forums
 
 
 
 
 
namaste.

< Message edited by crouchingtigress -- 6/27/2008 4:47:31 AM >

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RE: Dominator/Dominatrix - 6/27/2008 5:14:21 AM   
DominantJenny


Posts: 645
Joined: 4/6/2008
Status: offline 		Linguistically, the "person" after "dominant" being implied is acceptable, imo, there are many similar cases in casual speech (as opposed to formal writing.) Verb as noun, not so much. The problem with using dominatrix is that the term has developed a common connotation of "paid dominant female".

(in reply to crouchingtigress)
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RE: Dominator/Dominatrix - 6/27/2008 5:34:41 AM   
RedMagic1


Posts: 6470
Joined: 5/10/2007
Status: offline 		In biology, "dominant" is a noun that refers to a gene or a plant that has more affect on the system than other genes or plants.  It is totally grammatically legit to say "my dominant."

Plus anyone who kept telling me the real word was "dominator" would impress me about as much as someone who told me the correct way to pronounce the year 2000 was "twenty-hundred."  Language is flexible, not rigid, and there's no twue BDSM pronunciation dictionary.

< Message edited by RedMagic1 -- 6/27/2008 5:44:52 AM >

_____________________________

Not with envy, not with a twisted heart, shall you feel superior, or go about boasting. Rather in goodness by action make true your song and your word. Thus you shall be highly regarded, and able to live in peace with all others.
- 15th century Aztec

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RE: Dominator/Dominatrix - 6/27/2008 5:39:37 AM   
Isolation


Posts: 14
Joined: 6/22/2008
Status: offline 		Thank you for the welcome, one and all.

You are right, Jenny, about its use as an adjective implying the noun (male/female/man/woman/Jenny/ etc). But I have seen it used as "male dominant" which is a complete role reversal vis a vis adjective/noun ("male" being a noun used as an adjective to influence the meaning of the adjective "dominant", here being used as a noun).

And you are right, Tigress, about the word not being in current circulation.

That's why I mentioned it. It is concise.

And you have to admit, "Dominator" has a better ring to it that "dominant" or "dominate" when it comes to titles.

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RE: Dominator/Dominatrix - 6/27/2008 5:43:01 AM   
RCdc


Posts: 8674
Status: offline 		Dominator?
Just makes me visualise Arnie.
 
the.dark.

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love isnt gazing into each others eyes - it's looking forward in the same direction

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RE: Dominator/Dominatrix - 6/27/2008 5:44:40 AM   
crouchingtigress


Posts: 4387
Joined: 3/19/2006
From: Maui
Status: offline 		hmmm i cant say for sure because the word dominant has been in my vernacular for so many years now, and i have had so many yummy Pavlovian type experiences on both sides of the word (i am a switch), that i would be biased in my assessment.

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Service slut, durable plaything, and ponypenquincatdogpig, to Lee Harrington

This is him

"Its none of my buisness what other people think of me."




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RE: Dominator/Dominatrix - 6/27/2008 5:45:59 AM   
Isolation


Posts: 14
Joined: 6/22/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: RedMagic1

In biology, "dominant" is a noun that refers to a gene or a plant that has more effect on the system than other genes or plants.  It is totally grammatically legit to say "my dominant."


True, when speaking of genetics.

quote:


Plus anyone who kept telling me the real word was "dominator" would impress me about as much as someone who told me the correct way to pronounce the year 2000 was "twenty-hundred."  Language is flexible, not rigid, and there's no twue BDSM pronunciation dictionary.


Well, as I said, I don't expect this to produce any earth-shaking consequences.

Justy a minor diversion on a Friday morning and who knows. Perhaps over time the word will catch up to "dominatrix" someday.

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RE: Dominator/Dominatrix - 6/27/2008 5:49:40 AM   
RCdc


Posts: 8674
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: DominantJenny

Linguistically, the "person" after "dominant" being implied is acceptable, imo, there are many similar cases in casual speech (as opposed to formal writing.) Verb as noun, not so much. The problem with using dominatrix is that the term has developed a common connotation of "paid dominant female".


I find the word 'dominia' attractive.  It is a word in it's own right it's usage from old english for women who hold thier own title.  Or it can mean universe.  Either way, it pretty much rocks.
 
the.dark.

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RC&dc


love isnt gazing into each others eyes - it's looking forward in the same direction

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RE: Dominator/Dominatrix - 6/27/2008 5:57:52 AM   
brat4fun


Posts: 47
Joined: 4/27/2008
Status: offline 		I love language.  Words have meaning, and it's one of the most common mind-f***s we have to shade or twist meanings to suit ourselves.

My personal preference to "Dominant" over "Dominator" is as simple as the general feeling of the word.  "Dominator" strikes a feeling of what someone does.  "Dominant" strikes a feeling of what someone is.  The law of primacy comes into play there as well.  "Dominant" is what I heard first, so that's the one that sticks.

I would agree, however, that anyone looking for a "Dominate" should first look for their grade school grammar book.  Then again, I'm one of those snobby types who knows and respects the difference between "your" and "you're" and doesn't even want to contemplate what "ur" is.  *grin*

Anne

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RE: Dominator/Dominatrix - 6/27/2008 5:57:59 AM   
RedMagic1


Posts: 6470
Joined: 5/10/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Isolation
True, when speaking of genetics.

And ecology.  There have been several examples on the news over the last couple years.  A species gets transported to a new area, and takes over that area.  There's lots of ecology metaphors in BDSM terms already.  Example: "alpha slave."  You are criticising people for doing something that is not incorrect, even from the grammar-nazi perspective. 

The ladies are being nice.  I'll be direct.  Sometimes people invent a rule just so they can convict others of breaking it.  They post on the forums and get their One True Way shot down by people with practical life experience.  I've found it more helpful to be friendly and open to the wide variety ways people have of expressing themselves.


_____________________________

Not with envy, not with a twisted heart, shall you feel superior, or go about boasting. Rather in goodness by action make true your song and your word. Thus you shall be highly regarded, and able to live in peace with all others.
- 15th century Aztec

(in reply to Isolation)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: Dominator/Dominatrix - 6/27/2008 6:19:35 AM   
Isolation


Posts: 14
Joined: 6/22/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: RedMagic1

I've found it more helpful to be friendly and open to the wide variety ways people have of expressing themselves.



Except when it comes to my way of expressing myself, it seems.

I'm still waiting for the "friendly" part.



Relax, RedMagic. I'm not trying to take over the bdsm world. Just introducing a word that rarely is ever used yet actually applies to BDSM just as well as "dominatrix".

No harm done.

As an aside, I suppose we'd also have to change "submissive" to "submittor", to match "Dominator".

Now I've given something for everyone to say "Hey wait a minute ... !"


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RE: Dominator/Dominatrix - 6/27/2008 6:21:54 AM   
DominantJenny


Posts: 645
Joined: 4/6/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Darcyandthedark

I find the word 'dominia' attractive.  It is a word in it's own right it's usage from old english for women who hold thier own title.  Or it can mean universe.  Either way, it pretty much rocks.
 
the.dark.

 
I don't like the "mini" in there. :P
I've been liking domina more myself these days, after seeing it used with some frequency by several of the guys here. I'm not as picky about language as I used to be, though. I'm content to accept that "dominant" has evolved to be a noun, at least among those involved in BDSM.

(in reply to RCdc)
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RE: Dominator/Dominatrix - 6/27/2008 6:25:38 AM   
Isolation


Posts: 14
Joined: 6/22/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: brat4fun

"Dominator" strikes a feeling of what someone does.  "Dominant" strikes a feeling of what someone is.



That's a good point, Anne. There is something aggressive about "Dominator", and something passive about "dominant".

Perhaps because the pronunciation of "Dominator" parallels "dominate" and so we draw on our understanding of "dominate" to form a picture of the meaning of "Dominator".

Now I wonder if a person's preference for the word has anything to do with the kind of domination they prefer/admire/practice.

(in reply to brat4fun)
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RE: Dominator/Dominatrix - 6/27/2008 6:29:44 AM   
RCdc


Posts: 8674
Status: offline 		Domina is a marvel character  shes pretty cool too.
I never saw the mini bit.  In Latin, it's the female of 'Dominus' which is far more attractive to me than 'dominator'.  That word just makes me smirk for some reason.  Cannot take it seriously.
 
the.dark.

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love isnt gazing into each others eyes - it's looking forward in the same direction

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RE: Dominator/Dominatrix - 6/27/2008 6:37:48 AM   
brat4fun


Posts: 47
Joined: 4/27/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Darcyandthedark
That word just makes me smirk for some reason.  Cannot take it seriously.


Yeah.  There is that whole giggle factor that needs to be considered. 

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RE: Dominator/Dominatrix - 6/27/2008 6:40:55 AM   
RedMagic1


Posts: 6470
Joined: 5/10/2007
Status: offline 		Isolation, you're 51, not a college sophomore.  If you post that doing something dorky is "proper" and you think "some might find this useful," you shouldn't be surprised if people think you're a dork.  Instead, everyone on this thread is trying to give you perspective and context, including me.

Jeez, who cares what you call yourself?  Not me.  I'm not trying to date you.  I do, however, have little patience for pompous know-it-all-ism.  And to say on the one hand that you are right, and on the other hand I should relax because it doesn't really mean anything, sounds passive-aggressive.  The word "dominator" doesn't matter to me.  Your communication style is sending up red flags, though.

Welcome to the forums.


_____________________________

Not with envy, not with a twisted heart, shall you feel superior, or go about boasting. Rather in goodness by action make true your song and your word. Thus you shall be highly regarded, and able to live in peace with all others.
- 15th century Aztec

(in reply to DominantJenny)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: Dominator/Dominatrix - 6/27/2008 6:43:11 AM   
Leatherist


Posts: 5149
Joined: 12/11/2007
Status: offline 		Worry less about the label-and more about the content.

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I'm not taking custom orders.

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RE: Dominator/Dominatrix - 6/27/2008 6:46:33 AM   
RCdc


Posts: 8674
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Isolation

There is something aggressive about "Dominator", and something passive about "dominant".

Perhaps because the pronunciation of "Dominator" parallels "dominate" and so we draw on our understanding of "dominate" to form a picture of the meaning of "Dominator".

Now I wonder if a person's preference for the word has anything to do with the kind of domination they prefer/admire/practice.


It's all subjective hey.  I don't see the word dominant as passive at all - not when the meaning is so clearly defined.
Dominator indicates falseness.  When used as a noun it is expressing a elevated position, which just isn't there considering all peoples are equally unequal.  To me it screams 'pretense'.  And Arnie.
 
Welcome to the forums btw.
 
the.dark.

_____________________________
RC&dc


love isnt gazing into each others eyes - it's looking forward in the same direction

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