The Lazy Sadist, a confession.

The Lazy Sadist, a confession. (Full Version)

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DominantJenny -> The Lazy Sadist, a confession. (6/3/2008 2:05:29 PM)
I admit it; I'm lazy. I watched MasterFireMaam's excellent Florentine flogging video, and I thought, gee, that's nice, but eh, why bother? I can do a basic figure eight type flogging thing and that's as fancy as I get. Most of the time, I lay him down and just flog away in basic ham-handed fashion, sometimes harder, sometimes softer, sometimes more with the tips, sometimes more with the middle. For different effects, I have different floggers. I've used a single bit of rope, too...again, nothing fancy, but it hurt like hell. I use clothespins and nipple clamps and my thick rubber "nightstick" and my crop and a bamboo backscratcher and a pen, and a few other things I'm surely leaving out. I do not wield any of these things in ways that take much effort to learn. They all cause pain, different kinds and intenstities of pain, and I use them for that purpose. I have heard that different styles of flogging, for example, can provide different kinds of pain, but, from what I can tell, the effort involved in acquiring the skill does not equate to the actual variation in sensation that may be provided...if I want to hit from a different angle, I stand in a different position, and I can modify the force I use from light to full strength, and that feels like a pretty decent amount of variation to me...and my current partner, at least, isn't voicing any complaints. Now, maybe I'm missing something, and, if I am, I'm sure this thread will be source of enlightenment, but I suspect this is just a personal thing...some people like the fancy and complicated, some are more into basic and effective. It gets complicated for me in the mind, that's where I DO have technique and skill; psychology and people interest me...floggers are just a means to an end, though not always the same end. (Sometimes I want to cause pain 'cause it turns me on. Sometimes I want to get the submissive to a certain headspace and pain is what will do it. Sometimes I want to demonstrate my power in a brutal and graphic way. Etcetera.) So am I missing something? Are there other lazy sadists out there, perfectly happy to NOT be up on the latest complicated techniques?

Lumus -> RE: The Lazy Sadist, a confession. (6/3/2008 2:17:45 PM)
Hmm, I wouldn't call myself lazy [actually, the opposite, I tend to be work-obsessive]; however, I am an exploratory type that would be more likely to try something for myself rather than take lessons. I wouldn't flat-out ignore the opportunity to learn something new, and if it were something that requires careful skill and judgment then yes, by all means...I'll study before doing anything. In general, though, I'd be inclined like yourself to attempt my own thing, and if it were new to me there would be much talk first between Rain and I, rest assured...

TwoNYCDommes -> RE: The Lazy Sadist, a confession. (6/3/2008 2:38:02 PM)
I share your perspective, to some extent. If I want to hurt someone, for example, it's about hurting them, not playing with some new toy or technique. That said, it can be amusing to explore different toys and techniques from time to time--though it's not my focus--so I have picked various things up over time without really trying to. And I am lucky to have my darling, who tends to have any complicated learning-intensive skills that I lack.

camille65 -> RE: The Lazy Sadist, a confession. (6/3/2008 3:04:56 PM)
I love the idea of different techniques. Of course I'm on the other side of the whip so there is no learning curve for me in that manner but I really think I understand the fascination with pursuing and learning different ways of doing things. Its cool. [:D]

Stusmobile -> RE: The Lazy Sadist, a confession. (6/3/2008 3:09:04 PM)
I think a lot of it has to do with the broad scope of BDSM, nobody is likely to be an expert in all areas, so we each gravitate to those forms which suit us personally. I fall into the pain for an end rather than pain for an art grouping. While I want to be bring that pain around in a safe manner, it's not as important to Me to bring it around in as elaborate manner as somebody else. I like the fact My sub will respond to a few well chosen words while others prefer a verbal assault. Nothing wrong with either approach as far as I'm concerned, both techniques are as valid as each other and will suit different people.

Missokyst -> RE: The Lazy Sadist, a confession. (6/3/2008 3:26:03 PM)
Yeah.. I am a masochist but I am also a sadist and I can see where you are coming from. I find the fancy techniques are effective for show. As a maso it feels no different. As a top, it makes for a nice visual and people say "OOOOOOOOOOO AHHHHHHHH, how did you do that?" Personally I don't need the accolades when I am being sadistic. I just enjoy creating sensation. I am interested in head space only because for me topping involves giving people pleasure. From a headspace angle as a sub, fancy means squat. As a top, I am more interested in the mental aspect, than a visual piece that my bottom can't enjoy viewing from the audience. Give me a job and I will make it happen. Tell me to create an art piece and it better be something I find interesting. Fancy footwork is not my thing. Kyst

LadyHibiscus -> RE: The Lazy Sadist, a confession. (6/3/2008 4:05:25 PM)
Yeah, I like looking at the pretty stuff. I like looking at shibari, too. But, I really just want to immobilize and kick ass. [:D]

Prinsexx -> RE: The Lazy Sadist, a confession. (6/3/2008 4:16:27 PM)
The Lazy sadist; a Confession You are absolved. I usually am blindfold or have my eyes closed...and from behind? across my back? i don't know if it's even a whip or a cane or a slipper until it touches down. [;)]

LuckyAlbatross -> RE: The Lazy Sadist, a confession. (6/3/2008 6:20:27 PM)
Well you could say I'm a lazy dominant because I put all the work in early to train them to make my life easier and do less day to day stuff :) It's all about what pushes your buttons.

DominantJenny -> RE: The Lazy Sadist, a confession. (6/3/2008 6:31:07 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Missokyst snip for highlighting purposes As a maso it feels no different. Oh, good! That was really the thing I wondered about most...

Misstoyou -> RE: The Lazy Sadist, a confession. (6/3/2008 6:38:38 PM)
Talk about lazy, I use Velcro cuffs. lol For me, it's more about effectiveness than image...though I loved MasterFireMaam's video, too!

Skully7000 -> RE: The Lazy Sadist, a confession. (6/3/2008 6:40:18 PM)
Tickling... one of my favorite techniques.... sometimes it requires a little bit of strength if they are a wiggler... let me tell you very few things are as fun as pushing your finger into a rib or armpit and having that person fall to the floor begging you to stop.. I really do consider tickling the ultimate lazy dom tool. Cheers Skully p.s. that is not to say that I don't enjoy getting good and sweaty giving a great beating...or lifting someone up for rope and such... just sometimes its the simplest movements that get some of the most extreme reactions. and I am by far a reaction junky!

Evility -> RE: The Lazy Sadist, a confession. (6/3/2008 6:46:33 PM)
I'm a bit of a lazy sadist, too. I enjoyed watching her video and appreciate the time spent learning that style and also the effort she put forth in sharing it. The technique itself reminds me of juggling. Oddly, I don't find juggling to be terribly erotic, either. Everything I do is a means to an end. Floggers aren't on my short list of favorite things. I have a couple that I like that I made myself. They aren't fabulously finished - you'd never mistake the fact that I made them in my basement. They are extremely functional and I always favor function over fashion. And they are each one of a kind. An ex almost ruined flogging in particular and impact play in general for me. The post flogging critique led me to coin a euphemism called The Goldilocks Syndrome. Almost every hit was either too high, too low, too hard, too soft, too much to the left, to far to the right, too many times in the same spot or too much wrap around. Albert Brooks' character in Defending Your Life had it easy. I went straight from that into where I am now - with someone who understands that I flog (when I do) for me. Not for her. Life is good. I have a few dominant friends who are clearly into technique like this. They play often in public - something else I am not into. As long as they are happy I am happy. Spelling edit.

Leatherist -> RE: The Lazy Sadist, a confession. (6/3/2008 7:42:12 PM)
My hands alone work perfectly well, thank you very much.

Padriag -> RE: The Lazy Sadist, a confession. (6/3/2008 8:46:27 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: DominantJenny Are there other lazy sadists out there, perfectly happy to NOT be up on the latest complicated techniques? Me as well. I'm more about the ends than the means. I don't do public play, so there's no one for me to impress with how well I can crack a whip or swing a flogger or what have you. I'm more interested in the effect what I am doing is having on the intended subject, and whether that effect is what I wanted or not. I'll learn some specific technique, if and only if, it expands my ability to achieve those desired ends. That's just me though, its how I work.

TemptingNviceSub -> RE: The Lazy Sadist, a confession. (6/3/2008 9:08:08 PM)
I imagine it simply comes down to how interested you wish to be,how creative, how much it captures your imagination..as with anything you may have an interest in..and not necessarily BDSM creations. This can apply to someone who may have a mild interest in golf..how far do you wish to take this interest?..how much effort? how much money? etc....Tempting

Padriag -> RE: The Lazy Sadist, a confession. (6/3/2008 9:30:04 PM)
Yeah... but its a little more than that. Creativity and imagination have more than one form of expression. Take your golf analogy... one golf player may focus on perfect form, the latest clubs, etc. Another golfer may focus on driving range and accuracy. Still another may focus on how best to deal with difficult situations like getting caught in the rough or sand traps, shooting over water hazards. Is any one of those golfers lazy... no, not at all. Is any one of them necessarily superior... not in general, but certainly in the areas they focus on. That's kinda how I see this. Some are going for artistic form, putting on a show. I imagine that's great for someone who does a lot of public play, demonstrations, etc... and/or for someone who likes really impressing a submissive with technique (or has one who really gets off on that, and I'm sure some do). But, someone who focuses on end results and practical techniques isn't less or lazy... just focusing on a different specialty. This thread started off seeming a little defensive, as though not going for fancy techniques needed to be justified. I hope by the end both are seen as simply different paths, and that it isn't a contest or at least doesn't need to be.

fungasm -> RE: The Lazy Sadist, a confession. (6/3/2008 9:36:51 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: DominantJenny from what I can tell, the effort involved in acquiring the skill does not equate to the actual variation in sensation that may be provided...if I want to hit from a different angle, I stand in a different position, and I can modify the force I use from light to full strength, and that feels like a pretty decent amount of variation to me...and my current partner, at least, isn't voicing any complaints. While I think it is fabulous that you have found a partner who loves what you do, I disagree with your assessment. Someone who is skilled at all modulations of flogging can do amazing things. It's not just thwak, thwak, thud. It's the difference between scrambled eggs and an omelette. Take the same ingredients, but a little skill makes a world of difference. There is also something about being flogged by someone who knows what they are doing. Not that you don't know what you are doing- but I've met some amazing women who were simply brilliant at this. There is no hesitation. There is no deliberation. There is simply sensation. The patterns are also deceptive. They lull you. When you are being flogged you get a false sense of security, a sense that you know what will happen to you. You feel like a canvas, a work of art to be used. Even if you are dominant, I highly recommend getting flogged by someone with these skills. It's incredible.

TemptingNviceSub -> RE: The Lazy Sadist, a confession. (6/3/2008 9:41:26 PM)
A simple matter of differing results being sought...makes sense..[sm=meh.gif]...Tempting

Owner4SexSlave -> RE: The Lazy Sadist, a confession. (6/3/2008 11:11:13 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: fungasm quote: ORIGINAL: DominantJenny from what I can tell, the effort involved in acquiring the skill does not equate to the actual variation in sensation that may be provided...if I want to hit from a different angle, I stand in a different position, and I can modify the force I use from light to full strength, and that feels like a pretty decent amount of variation to me...and my current partner, at least, isn't voicing any complaints. While I think it is fabulous that you have found a partner who loves what you do, I disagree with your assessment. Someone who is skilled at all modulations of flogging can do amazing things. It's not just thwak, thwak, thud. It's the difference between scrambled eggs and an omelette. Take the same ingredients, but a little skill makes a world of difference. There is also something about being flogged by someone who knows what they are doing. Not that you don't know what you are doing- but I've met some amazing women who were simply brilliant at this. There is no hesitation. There is no deliberation. There is simply sensation. The patterns are also deceptive. They lull you. When you are being flogged you get a false sense of security, a sense that you know what will happen to you. You feel like a canvas, a work of art to be used. Even if you are dominant, I highly recommend getting flogged by someone with these skills. It's incredible. Ditto right with you 120% on what you just posted! Yes, I love having my back arms and few other places flogged. Hell, I will use a flogger on myself. I'm a flogger whore, love playing with 'em. Hell, probally be the last toy I'd part with if I had to...

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