Collarspace Discussion Forums


Home  Login  Search 

Should I wear a buttplug or use numbing cream?


View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest
 
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> Should I wear a buttplug or use numbing cream? Page: [1] 2   next >   >>
Login
Message << Older Topic   Newer Topic >>
Should I wear a buttplug or use numbing cream? - 4/30/2008 2:32:22 AM   
Labia


Posts: 3
Joined: 4/30/2008
Status: offline 		My Master loves to have anal sex with me. Up until recently I didn't find it an issue. Something had triggred me into not relaxing as of late and I find it terribly painful when he pushes himself into my sphincter and starts the pistion action. It has become so much of an issue that I don't want to sleep in the same bed and he is fraustrated that I don't want it cause it hurts. He has tried a bit to sooth me. From massaging my back, squeezing my breasts. To hurting me in other ways to take my mind of the internal pain of his penis inside my sphincter. Like grabbing a fistful of my hair and twisting it from my sclap to spanking me.
It is getting so bad that the last time I told him to stop he got the shitz and muttered he was about to come and he had to stop.
I want to relax like I used to so it can be enjoyable for me and him.
I have been considering on getting a buttplug just a small one to wear for a short period during the day. Hopefully to get used to it. Is this a good idea? Or is there a good numbing cream to put around the sphincter?
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: Should I wear a buttplug or use numbing cream? - 4/30/2008 3:29:01 AM   
JonasW


Posts: 22
Joined: 4/21/2008
Status: offline 		I'd be careful about numbing cream...if applied, you possibly don't feel, if something gets injured.

I have made good experiences with long periods of massages around your anal region, widening with fingers or toys (start with smaller diameters) and a lot of lubricant. Try to relax and ask him not to force everything to end with penetration. Perhaps, if you don't have the pressure to be taken anal...perhaps that might help.

I had a gf that loved to finger herself in that region, she even masturbated that way and I never met such a relaxed asshole again in my life till now ;)
Play around with yourself, explore that region. Then I think you'll might feel, that the good feelings dominate.

Don't forget lubricant...

(in reply to Labia)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: Should I wear a buttplug or use numbing cream? - 4/30/2008 5:26:28 AM   
Madame4a


Posts: 2045
Joined: 2/4/2008
From: Washington, DC area
Status: offline 		Get Tristan's guide to anal sex...

(in reply to Labia)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: Should I wear a buttplug or use numbing cream? - 4/30/2008 5:53:33 AM   
thetammyjo


Posts: 6322
Joined: 9/8/2005
Status: offline 		If it used to be ok with you and now it hurts, I'd suggest seeing a doctor.

You may also want to review together the steps you used to take before and compare them now -- do you use the same amount of lube, has your diet changed, etc.

_____________________________

Love, Peace, Hugs, Kisses, Whips & Chains,

TammyJo

Check out my website at http://www.thetammyjo.com Or www.tammyjoeckhart.com

And my LJ where I post fiction in progress if you "friend" me at http://thetammyjo.livejournal.com/

(in reply to Labia)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: Should I wear a buttplug or use numbing cream? - 4/30/2008 7:49:00 AM   
abcbsex


Posts: 478
Joined: 3/29/2008
Status: offline 		the same thing happened to me for a while, it's like my ass just said, "nope! show's over!" and wouldn't budge. I eventually was able to relax it again by masturbating and stimulating my anus at the same time. That way, good feelings were associated with it instead of the pain that would come from any attempt at anal sex. Then after a while of just teasing the outside, I pushed a little further in while masturbating, and over time was able to move up to a butt plug with minimal pain. So, I'd recommend the buttplug but only after you work on it a little bit with just your fingers, and make sure to get yourself horny before you put it in. Another thing he can help with is loosening your anus with his finger while you're having sex, he might not be so discouraged if he's part of the solution!

Best of Luck!

(in reply to thetammyjo)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: Should I wear a buttplug or use numbing cream? - 4/30/2008 7:56:08 AM   
ResidentSadist


Posts: 12580
Joined: 2/11/2007
From: a mean old Daddy, but I like you - Joni Mitchell
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Labia
I have been considering on getting a buttplug just a small one to wear for a short period during the day. Hopefully to get used to it. Is this a good idea? Or is there a good numbing cream to put around the sphincter?
Using a buttplug for anal training is a tried and true path to success.  If you use the cream or other drugs the anesthetic can mask the pain from damage being done.  ou may get yourself some hemorrhoids in the deal.  In fact, if you now have pain and didn’t uses to, perhaps you should take the advice of thetammyjo and go see a doctor.

_____________________________

-=BDSM Book List=- Reading is Fundamental !!!
I give good thread.

(in reply to Labia)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: Should I wear a buttplug or use numbing cream? - 4/30/2008 9:21:16 AM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline 		Go to the doctor stat. If this is suddenly turning painful there must be a reason. I'm guessing internal hemorrhoids. Colonorectal specialist, ask your primary for a referral.

_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!


(in reply to ResidentSadist)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: Should I wear a buttplug or use numbing cream? - 4/30/2008 9:40:00 AM   
kiwisub12


Posts: 4742
Joined: 1/11/2006
Status: offline 		Is the pain generalised or in one specific spot that doesn't vary.  Does it hurt when you have a bowel movement? If the answer is yes, then you may have an anal tear or fissure, and should see a doctor. Don't use numbing cream - if there is damaged tissue it could get worse if you can't feel pain.

If the answer to the above questions is no, then try the butt plug. It should help loosen the anal muscle.

(in reply to DesFIP)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: Should I wear a buttplug or use numbing cream? - 4/30/2008 9:52:52 AM   
MladyHathor


Posts: 510
Joined: 4/6/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP

Go to the doctor stat. If this is suddenly turning painful there must be a reason. I'm guessing internal hemorrhoids. Colonorectal specialist, ask your primary for a referral.


I recommend what Des has said here, as those pesky hemos can reside inside--however, anal relaxation takes mental work as well---sometimes the mind isn't in gear ( like labor pains)---so if you check out ok, check out a lamaze tape on breathing and relaxation--the first few times Master needs to realize its an effort but after that you should be back in groove.

_____________________________

The Mistress Hathor, always and forever, much to the disdain and discomfort of others.

(in reply to DesFIP)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: Should I wear a buttplug or use numbing cream? - 4/30/2008 10:01:41 AM   
SteelofUtah


Posts: 5307
Joined: 10/2/2007
From: St George Utah
Status: offline 		You may be experincing a structural tear of the Outer Sphinxter It is like chapped lips the tears will be there untill you let them heal however you want them to heal and still be able to have anal sex and so the best advise is to do what has already be suggested.

Masturbate your Ass, Use Toys however a Butt Plug is NOT advised because it won't help stretch out the Structrual tears.

It will be a little painful and uncomfortable at first but USE LOTS OF LUBE or if you really wanna help it along Use Unscented Lotion. If you got this once so you know you can get it again. If it is important to you to keep up with this you should mausturbate your ass regularly.

My andi is currently going through a bout with this if you do nothing it will keep hurting if you want to enjoy it you will have to start to fix it and so that you know it will also be painful however I wouold suggest masturbating with something smaller than his penis and possible getting into Enema Cleaning as well as Keeping it clean will help in the healing process.

As Always

Steel

_____________________________

Just Steel
Resident Therapeutic Metallurgist
The Steel Warm-Up © ™
For the Uber Posters
Thanks for the Grammatical support : ) ~ Term

(in reply to kiwisub12)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: Should I wear a buttplug or use numbing cream? - 4/30/2008 10:08:48 AM   
OmegaG


Posts: 1474
Joined: 10/23/2007
Status: offline 		another thing that hasn't been considered, which admittedly is improbable at your age is a tumor.  I'm in the go see a doctor camp.

_____________________________


Regret for the things we did can be tempered by time; it is regret for the things we did not do that is inconsolable. Sydney J. Harris

Sex without pain is like food without taste.
- de Sade

(in reply to SteelofUtah)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: Should I wear a buttplug or use numbing cream? - 4/30/2008 10:10:04 AM   
cjan


Posts: 3513
Joined: 2/21/2008
Status: offline 		OP, you have gotten some good advice here, so far, and I suggest you follow it. However, once you've done so, perhaps you might consider donning a strapon and pegging your , ummm, Dom. That way, whether he is ready to cum or not, he may develop an appreciation and a li'l empathy, even, for the discomfort that it has caused you. I know, it's sooo unsubbly, yada, yada, but, it seems to me, what's good for the goose, etc....



_____________________________

"I never saw a wild thing sorry for itself. A bird will fall ,frozen , dead, from a bough without ever having felt sorry for itself."- D.H. L

" When you look into the abyss, the abyss also looks in to you"- Frank Nitti



(in reply to SteelofUtah)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: Should I wear a buttplug or use numbing cream? - 4/30/2008 10:21:02 AM   
ResidentSadist


Posts: 12580
Joined: 2/11/2007
From: a mean old Daddy, but I like you - Joni Mitchell
Status: offline 		Now that a 1,000 lbs of sensible advice has been dispensed, lets get to the silly and sarcastic stuff.  Try this to loosed your ass up:

Use Bengay as lube, it says it loosens tight muscles..  LOL

_____________________________

-=BDSM Book List=- Reading is Fundamental !!!
I give good thread.

(in reply to cjan)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: Should I wear a buttplug or use numbing cream? - 4/30/2008 10:21:24 AM   
dawntreader


Posts: 3045
Joined: 11/23/2006
Status: offline 		Seriously, see a doctor~

_____________________________

It is choice - not chance - that determines our destiny~
Jean Nidetch

There is a war going on for your mind...if you are thinking, you are winning~
Flobots

(in reply to cjan)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: Should I wear a buttplug or use numbing cream? - 4/30/2008 10:29:41 AM   
sweetnurseBBW


Posts: 2464
Joined: 1/26/2006
From: North Carolina
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: cjan

OP, you have gotten some good advice here, so far, and I suggest you follow it. However, once you've done so, perhaps you might consider donning a strapon and pegging your , ummm, Dom. That way, whether he is ready to cum or not, he may develop an appreciation and a li'l empathy, even, for the discomfort that it has caused you. I know, it's sooo unsubbly, yada, yada, but, it seems to me, what's good for the goose, etc....




OMG!! That made my day!!

_____________________________

Sir Pain's pain slut

(in reply to cjan)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: Should I wear a buttplug or use numbing cream? - 4/30/2008 10:33:32 AM   
abcbsex


Posts: 478
Joined: 3/29/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: cjan

OP, you have gotten some good advice here, so far, and I suggest you follow it. However, once you've done so, perhaps you might consider donning a strapon and pegging your , ummm, Dom. That way, whether he is ready to cum or not, he may develop an appreciation and a li'l empathy, even, for the discomfort that it has caused you. I know, it's sooo unsubbly, yada, yada, but, it seems to me, what's good for the goose, etc....





This backfired for me... it wasn't a strap on but I had been complaining that our butt plug had a painful bump or imperfection... so once when I was gone all day, Alpha tried it on himself... After that he didn't have much sympathy but we still got a higher quality buttplug. Now I just have the excuse that I have a dainty lady ass and his is tough and manly.

_____________________________

I was trained at MasterLordDarkness' Center for Subs Who Don't Serve Good and Wanna Learn to Do Other Stuff Good Too.....

but it needed to be at least.... four times bigger.


(in reply to cjan)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: Should I wear a buttplug or use numbing cream? - 4/30/2008 12:00:13 PM   
xbutterflyx


Posts: 51
Joined: 7/18/2006
Status: offline 		See a doctor ASAP!

After a clean bill of health is obtained, i would try a small and very pliable plug. It "gives" somewhat and lotsa lube. Also, bearing down helps open and relax those rather tight and strong muscles "there".

Trust me on this: "Not all plugs are the same."


xbx

(in reply to abcbsex)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: Should I wear a buttplug or use numbing cream? - 5/1/2008 12:15:13 AM   
Labia


Posts: 3
Joined: 4/30/2008
Status: offline 		Hey guys Thanks for all your wonderful feedback.  When I do Bowel movements it is just as usual.   I am however going to the doctor on Monday. So I'll just tell you how it goes. :)

(in reply to xbutterflyx)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: Should I wear a buttplug or use numbing cream? - 5/1/2008 11:19:35 PM   
SubJordanTyler


Posts: 268
Joined: 4/16/2007
Status: offline 		I tend to agree - go to the doctor.  I've had tears and such before from some pretty extreme and rough anal play, and I will just go to the doc if it's bad enough.  I would try and train with buttplugs of different sizes.  Stretch your asshole out by working your way up among the different sizes.

(in reply to Labia)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: Should I wear a buttplug or use numbing cream? - 5/2/2008 3:49:58 PM   
babygurl4daddy


Posts: 19
Joined: 8/26/2006
Status: offline 		umm, time for a new dom that will respect you. i love being a babygirl... daddies are so sweet yet very strict and take care of you in every way.

(in reply to SubJordanTyler)
Profile   Post #: 20
Page:   [1] 2   next >   >>
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> Should I wear a buttplug or use numbing cream? Page: [1] 2   next >   >>
Jump to:





New Messages No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages Locked w/o New Messages
 Post New Thread
 Reply to Message
 Post New Poll
 Submit Vote
 Delete My Own Post
 Delete My Own Thread
 Rate Posts




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy

0.078