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RE: Perception of risk - 4/10/2008 5:43:47 PM   
gypsygrl


Posts: 1471
Joined: 10/8/2005
From: new york state
Status: offline
quote:

Does anyone even care that that's all I did???


I hear you.  Its a good conversation but I'd really hate to be in your position right now. 

*hugs*

_____________________________

“To be happy is to be able to become aware of oneself without fright.” ~Walter Benjamin


(in reply to Adelphus)
Profile   Post #: 41
RE: Perception of risk - 4/10/2008 8:48:09 PM   
TemptingNviceSub


Posts: 3054
Joined: 10/1/2005
Status: offline
That risk is assessed, accomidated, reduced, constantly watched for and adjusted to avoid... by anyone with even a modicum of experience. With a bit of common sense nobody enters into much seriously risky unless they trust the other person, at least trusting their competance.

So WHY do folks default to 'panic' and assumptions of "oh thats dangerous" in a negative way?

The risk has been assessed,accomodated,reduced by many experienced Dominant..however..(you had to know there was a however..:0)..as with many who I am sure have stated..one always thinks of the worse case scenerio..why?..because simply there are way to many uninformed,ignorant people in the world...and frankly, being a "Mom" type female, I have been trained to see the possible worse case scenerio...Such a thing can only be looked at with an appreciative eye on a case by case viewing..so hence..if done by say Ravenmuse who has shown his experience in such..appreciative eye and puddles form..if done by Johnny Bravo Dominant who saw a really "cool" picture of such and had to give it a go..shock,dismay,and angst would abound....Tempting

_____________________________

I have greatly enjoyed the second blooming...suddenly you find at the age of 50, that a whole new life has opened before you.........Agatha Christie.

You must make tracks into the unknown~~Thoreau

(in reply to RavenMuse)
Profile   Post #: 42
RE: Perception of risk - 4/10/2008 9:14:23 PM   
Adelphus


Posts: 87
Joined: 2/3/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: gypsygrl

quote:

Does anyone even care that that's all I did???


I hear you.  Its a good conversation but I'd really hate to be in your position right now. 

*hugs*


Yep. Thanks, love.;-)
Though I guess if someone's going to get beat, it might as wll be me.:-)

(in reply to gypsygrl)
Profile   Post #: 43
RE: Perception of risk - 4/10/2008 11:11:05 PM   
Guilty1974


Posts: 467
Joined: 11/2/2005
From: Den Haag
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: TemptingNviceSub
The risk has been assessed,accomodated,reduced by many experienced Dominant..however..(you had to know there was a however..:0)..as with many who I am sure have stated..one always thinks of the worse case scenerio..why?..because simply there are way to many uninformed,ignorant people in the world...and frankly, being a "Mom" type female, I have been trained to see the possible worse case scenerio...


Although I wasn't shocked by the image that Adelphus posted, I have seen a number of play situations that did scare the shit out of me, mostly concerning (suspension) rope bondage. I've seen people with not enough material knowledge hanging people from two strands of 6mm cotton, as well as people who had no clue whatsoever how to bring up the girl and people that I have a strong feeling that they wouldn't be able to handle an emergency. On occassion I've walked away from such public play because watching it and not commenting on it gave me the feeling to be sort of responsible in case of accidents. Point is, I just happen to know a fair bit about suspension bondage, so on occassion I feel quite confident that my risk assessment is better than that of the play partners. With other play forms I would less sure and more prone to give the players the benefit of the doubt.

< Message edited by Guilty1974 -- 4/10/2008 11:14:13 PM >

(in reply to TemptingNviceSub)
Profile   Post #: 44
RE: Perception of risk - 4/11/2008 5:14:59 AM   
robertolapiedra


Posts: 520
Joined: 5/3/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Adelphus

quote:

ORIGINAL: gypsygrl

quote:

Does anyone even care that that's all I did???


I hear you.  Its a good conversation but I'd really hate to be in your position right now. 

*hugs*


Yep. Thanks, love.;-)
Though I guess if someone's going to get beat, it might as wll be me.:-)



Hello Adelphus. I was responding to this : '' So WHY do folks default to 'panic' and assumptions of "oh thats dangerous" in a negative way?'' RM. I was not responding to your original thread, in fact, I did not respond at all to your thread.

When one wants to comment any kink as maybe being ''fantasy'', ''true'', ''uber'', ''RACK managed'', ''SSC managed'', ''dangerous'' or ''immoral'', one better be thick skinned on this forum.

I do not want to beat up on you unless properly invited. Just remember you may not be the target, just move away a little from the bull's eye of ''this'' thread which is meant (in my opinion) for the more judgmental part of the community. RL.


(in reply to Adelphus)
Profile   Post #: 45
RE: Perception of risk - 4/11/2008 10:21:54 AM   
BlackPhx


Posts: 3432
Joined: 11/8/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: hopelessfool

If others can do It why cant I. Many dont base what they see on reality but on fantasy. And I think thats why she reacted. I understand you cant police people. But You also have to look out for the people new in the life so that they get in situations you claim stupid.



It is commendable to want to protect people, and everyone should look out for their neighbor. Yes we are our brothers keeper...to SOME degree..but we are not his Sheperd!! Stay with me for a couple of lines adn you will see where I am going.

I agree with George Carlin.."I love this country for the freedoms we used to have". Everyday the Government steps in and takes more and more rights away from us in the name of health, welfare and big brother. We can choose to smoke as long as it is not in our office, our restaurants, our colleges, schools,  in 300 feet of a hospital )poor dad waiting to hear a baby has been born must go across the street and down the road from the PARKING Lot now in Florida), etc. They have tried to stap parents from smoking in their cars but that got shot down.

They are trying to bail out people who got in over their heads on Mortgages buying more house than they could reasonably afford if they had to change jobs. The heck with the rates rising, if they lost their jobs and had to take a lower salary they were screwed out the starting gate.

Don't spank your child it is abuse and they can have you arrested, BUT in some states you can be arrested for what your child does..go figure. This country has tried to regulate our sexuality since it's inception and just about everything we do is against the law.

Ok so where am I going? Someone maybe New to the public scene, but that does not mean they are one to what it is that they do. They are hopefully not a noob when it comes to finding out how to do things, whether it is replacing a washer on the faucet, wiring a lamp or suspending themselves by their arms. Yes they can watch the demo, the movies, read the books, etc. but there is a very strong chance that they have tried this at home long before they stepped out into the public scene, and if they haven't they go to that demo and ask them to show them how to do it safely. We lose 200 people minimum a year to hanging..MOST are alone when they die. We dislocate shoulders in hogties (even when we are experienced accidents happen), break a bone, an ankle, get cut by a whip (usually the first to get cut is the one learning to wield it) and do a lot of injuries to ourselves in the name of sexual pleasure. Guess what? Happens in the vanilla world too. Hardest time I ever had not laughing was listening to a vanilla friend of mine explain how she had dislocated her neck orgasming and falling off the bed. No rough sex just a misjudgement as to where they were on a satin clad bed at a critical moment.

We can tell them over and over again..go to demos, read books, get help but ultimately if they want to strap those ski's on, get out on the Black Diamond Slope and aim themselves nekkid downhill while balancing a pot of scalding water on their head and  piercing their nipples at the same time while having never taken a lesson and conquered the bunny slope... well there will either be a very rich doctor in their future.. or more space for those who stop and learn before doing.

The pictures are out there, the stories as well (the ones I write come with disclaimers and very strong warnings unlike most porn books), TV's and Movies and Jackass make producers rich and there is little we can say or do to stop someone from proving Darwin right. Mother Nature has a way however..if you get hurt, you heal and try to do it safer if you do it at all, if you fuck up bad enough, well Darwin is a harsh Daddy.

poenkitten (who knows even the Boy Scouts practise knots many times BEFORE tieing up the Girl Scouts)

(in reply to hopelessfool)
Profile   Post #: 46
RE: Perception of risk - 4/11/2008 10:24:50 AM   
BlackPhx


Posts: 3432
Joined: 11/8/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Guilty1974

On occassion I've walked away from such public play because watching it and not commenting on it gave me the feeling to be sort of responsible in case of accidents. Point is, I just happen to know a fair bit about suspension bondage, so on occassion I feel quite confident that my risk assessment is better than that of the play partners. With other play forms I would less sure and more prone to give the players the benefit of the doubt.


May I suggest speaking to the DM's in the play space. They can politely let the person know that there is a problem inherent in what they are doing that needs to be corrected for "insurance" reasons.

poenkitten

(in reply to Guilty1974)
Profile   Post #: 47
RE: Perception of risk - 4/11/2008 10:45:31 AM   
Guilty1974


Posts: 467
Joined: 11/2/2005
From: Den Haag
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: BlackPhx

May I suggest speaking to the DM's in the play space. They can politely let the person know that there is a problem inherent in what they are doing that needs to be corrected for "insurance" reasons.


Yes you may (I've was a DM myself for some years, so I know the drill). Unfortunately, around here not many DM's know enough about bondage to judge such situations, while they tend to trust the players knowledge. For instance, one place (now fortunately closed), allowed suspension from a single hook in crumbly medieval brickwork, while previously sling attachment points already had come down before the current DM's time. Even while I have some reputation with regard to bondage - running a site, doing performances occasionaly, teaching workshops - and while I had been a DM at that same location and knew the strength of the ceiling and the hooks therein, they told me they simply trusted this person. Consequently, I don't often inform DM's anymore, unless I think they're knowledgable enough.

Liability is less of an issue in Europe, so insurance reason aren't as convincing as it might be in the US.

(in reply to BlackPhx)
Profile   Post #: 48
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