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RE: Sacrificial lambs? - 2/24/2008 5:15:18 PM   
SailingBum


Posts: 3225
Joined: 12/10/2007
From: Sailin the stormy sea
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Missokyst

Well clearly the women who make those choices don't share it.  But when the majority do, then sometimes hot IS hot.  Not just perception.
Kyst
quote:

ORIGINAL: SailingBum
It's pretty obvious not everyone shares your view!  Maybe it's your view that's off.  Something to ponder.

BadOne



Somehow you missed my point.  Perhaps I wasn't clear.  Who are you to put your value system into someone elses relationship???  You act as if being popular is some sort of guideing light to make a relationship choice.  It looks like obama is the dems majority choice... Does that make him the correct choice???  According to you it does.

BadOne


< Message edited by SailingBum -- 2/24/2008 5:17:10 PM >

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Profile   Post #: 21
RE: Sacrificial lambs? - 2/24/2008 5:30:37 PM   
slaveluci


Posts: 4294
Joined: 3/2/2007
From: Little Rock, AR
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Missokyst
But what would make someone consistantly find themselves with this type of partner over and over?
What is the draw?

Why, to "fix" them, of course.  That was always the draw for me, I would have to admit.  Time and experience has taught me that it is impossible to "fix" another.  But those "bad boys" always drew me like a magnet until I spent almost 12 years trying to fix the baddest one I'd ever encountered and found myself down in the gutter for my efforts.  Long story short, I got up off of rock bottom, realized the only person I could fix was me, and set about doing it.  Then Master came along, took control of the proverbial reins, and the rest is sweet history.  He is the furthest thing from an a-hole that I can imagine and I honestly think most people would agree. 
quote:

What is the payoff?

There never was much of one.  The "draw" was their "badness" and I guess I also honestly didn't feel I deserved better than what I usually settled for.  Those days are long gone.  No draw or payoff there anymore.............luci

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RE: Sacrificial lambs? - 2/24/2008 5:33:53 PM   
Missokyst


Posts: 6041
Joined: 9/9/2006
Status: offline 		LMAO.. I made that observation 20 yrs ago!  The woman can't go two months without some new guy in her life.
Kyst
quote:

ORIGINAL: domiguy

Trust me...The problem is with your neice. She needs to put down the dick.


_____________________________

pain is the breaking of the shell that encloses your understanding ~Gibran, Kahlil

“The truth is, everyone is going to hurt you. You just got to find the ones worth suffering for.”
― Bob Marley


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Profile   Post #: 23
RE: Sacrificial lambs? - 2/24/2008 5:38:30 PM   
Missokyst


Posts: 6041
Joined: 9/9/2006
Status: offline 		Actually, I don't get involved with them or their choices. I am not naturally sympathetic, I tend more toward blunt realism.  But are you unfamilar with idle curiousity when you see something happen again and again?  Or is it that you missed that point?
Kyst
quote:

ORIGINAL: SailingBum

quote:

ORIGINAL: Missokyst

Well clearly the women who make those choices don't share it.  But when the majority do, then sometimes hot IS hot.  Not just perception.
Kyst
quote:

ORIGINAL: SailingBum
It's pretty obvious not everyone shares your view!  Maybe it's your view that's off.  Something to ponder.

BadOne



Somehow you missed my point.  Perhaps I wasn't clear.  Who are you to put your value system into someone elses relationship???  You act as if being popular is some sort of guideing light to make a relationship choice.  It looks like obama is the dems majority choice... Does that make him the correct choice???  According to you it does.

BadOne



_____________________________

pain is the breaking of the shell that encloses your understanding ~Gibran, Kahlil

“The truth is, everyone is going to hurt you. You just got to find the ones worth suffering for.”
― Bob Marley


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Profile   Post #: 24
RE: Sacrificial lambs? - 2/24/2008 5:43:49 PM   
LadyRainfire


Posts: 6040
Joined: 2/20/2008
Status: offline 		roflol... Then I'd be a freak of nature to her, Kyst. I joke that the more I know men, the more I like my cat. I prefer simply one ex-husband and waiting for an appropriate partner rather than chalking up a string of divorces or who knows what.   There is no payoff worth the heartache, hassle, legal fees or other BS. I've learned over the years that I don't need a man to complete myself. It's nice to have a partner, would be even nicer if he were in the lifestyle and understood it, but not a necessity. Sheesh, I feel old. But hey, at least I can appreciate it now!

_____________________________

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~ one half of "L&L"~

My current state of mind

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Profile   Post #: 25
RE: Sacrificial lambs? - 2/24/2008 5:48:00 PM   
MadRabbit


Posts: 3460
Joined: 8/9/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Missokyst

People who are sarcastic, argumentative, sometimes threatening, and never understand any opinion that does not fit with their own.



I wasn't aware your friends knew my roommate!

We need to have dinner sometime

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Profile   Post #: 26
RE: Sacrificial lambs? - 2/24/2008 5:55:40 PM   
Leatherist


Posts: 5149
Joined: 12/11/2007
Status: offline 		Some women like men who won't kiss every ass in sight just to be popular. It's called having a spine.

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I'm not taking custom orders.

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Profile   Post #: 27
RE: Sacrificial lambs? - 2/24/2008 6:16:19 PM   
CalifChick


Posts: 10717
Joined: 10/28/2007
From: California
Status: offline 		I was having a vaguely similar conversation with someone here whose picture has a distinctly dangerous, bad boy look to it. He was musing that women seem attracted to the bad boy look, but not the pic of him in the Italian 3 piece suit.  He said, basically, if you're going to go with stereotypes, the bad boy would be less successful, less secure, less able to provide for a submissive than someone who appeared more successful (the suit).

Well, the pic of him in the suit looks decidely sweet, in that innocent boy way, nothing that gets my girly parts, uh, moist. But the bad boy pic of him, yowrrrrrrrrrr.  It's dangerous and exciting and uhhh, okay, I'll stop there.

Does it make sense? Wouldn't women want the security and not the bad boy?  Ummm, I guess not in the short term, no.  Can I explain it?  LOL!  NO! So what does the sweet boy need to do to grab the girl? Fuck if I know!

Cali
(temporary Queen of the land of Stereotypica)


_____________________________

AKA "The Undisputed Goddess of Sarcasm", "Big Bad Cali" and "Yum Bum". Advisor to the Subbie Mafia, founding member of the W.A.C. and the Judgmental Bitches Brigade, member of the Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair-a's and Team Troll

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Profile   Post #: 28
RE: Sacrificial lambs? - 2/24/2008 7:12:18 PM   
marieToo


Posts: 3595
Joined: 5/21/2006
From: Jersey
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Missokyst

People who are sarcastic, argumentative, sometimes threatening, and never understand any opinion that does not fit with their own.
I know that many of us will find that rare as*hole in our lives.  But what would make someone consistantly find themselves with this type of partner over and over?
What is the draw?  What is the payoff?
Kyst


I'm not a sacrificial lamb and don't care about my 'status' or someone else's.  But I ask myself this question all the time, because I have an 8-year pattern behind me of exclusively choosing obnoxious, difficult and arrogant men.  It's very difficult to be submissive to them, and they can be downright oppressive in their dominance.  But it's almost like I love to hate it.  The only semi-solid explanation that I've come up with so far is that obnoxious motherfuckers are my particular kink. 



_____________________________

marie.


I give good agita.









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Profile   Post #: 29
RE: Sacrificial lambs? - 2/24/2008 7:51:00 PM   
KatyLied


Posts: 13029
Joined: 2/24/2005
From: Pennsylvania
Status: offline
quote:

She has been married 5 times so far.


Ouch.  I think she should seriously consider giving up the entire marriage thing.


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- Albert Einstein

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Profile   Post #: 30
RE: Sacrificial lambs? - 2/24/2008 7:53:40 PM   
TracyTaken


Posts: 615
Joined: 2/1/2008
Status: offline
quote:

Ouch. I think she should seriously consider giving up the entire marriage thing.


Maybe she likes having weddings, just not having husbands.

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Profile   Post #: 31
RE: Sacrificial lambs? - 2/24/2008 8:52:46 PM   
Missokyst


Posts: 6041
Joined: 9/9/2006
Status: offline 		LOL yeah, I agree.  But it does lend a reasonable chance of child support for her 6 offspring.  Thankfully this time around at least the tubes were tied.
Kyst

quote:

ORIGINAL: KatyLied

quote:

She has been married 5 times so far.


Ouch.  I think she should seriously consider giving up the entire marriage thing.



_____________________________

pain is the breaking of the shell that encloses your understanding ~Gibran, Kahlil

“The truth is, everyone is going to hurt you. You just got to find the ones worth suffering for.”
― Bob Marley


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Profile   Post #: 32
RE: Sacrificial lambs? - 2/24/2008 9:36:32 PM   
swtnsparkling


Posts: 1738
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline
quote:

It's pretty obvious not everyone shares your view!  Maybe it's your view that's off.

Rasies her hand.......I Share her view. I know people just like that.

_____________________________

Never make anyone a priority who treats you as an option 2003

Walk in Peace
A "No" uttered from deepest conviction is better than a "Yes" uttered merely to please



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Profile   Post #: 33
RE: Sacrificial lambs? - 2/24/2008 9:58:29 PM   
PrizedPosession


Posts: 1209
Joined: 11/2/2007
Status: offline 		Master and i are like that. He had a rough upbringing out of the slums and He doesn't tolerate BS and never has and He is the few that calls me on mine. He is also the one of two people who have stuck by me through hard times and through a lot of moves. i really do see a side of Him that many see because to Him it's no ones business who He is while being intimate or showing His soft side because He has been hurt alot.
And i love Him a lot. He is a good guy when He wants and people have judged Him so many times that it is how He is. Sometimes yea i wish He was a bit more sensitive but He wouldn't be who He is if He was. i really do see a side of Him most don't and when it happens i enjoy it.
-bobcat
But that's just me.

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Profile   Post #: 34
RE: Sacrificial lambs? - 2/25/2008 3:59:24 AM   
StormsSlave


Posts: 629
Joined: 2/6/2008
Status: offline 		So, when your mate calls himself an asshole, well, I'm telling you, he's an asshole, all right.  But I can only explain it like this.  We once bought a book together (don't remember the name; anyone know?) which asked if you would rather have one thing over another.  The first question I opened to was, "Would rather have a relationship with a person who was rude to the world, but wonderful to you, or would you rather have a relationship with a person who's kind to the world, but indifferent toward  you."

I'll take the first guy.  I did.  How he may be perceived by others, not my problem.  How My Lord makes me feel loved, cherished, and adored...priceless.

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Congratulate me...I'm a missus!!

--nobody's resident anything.

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Profile   Post #: 35
RE: Sacrificial lambs? - 2/25/2008 4:55:58 AM   
AtlantaMistress


Posts: 276
Joined: 6/14/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Missokyst

I don't want to hijack a thread but this occured to me over in ask submissive/slaves, and I thought it was better to ask this here.
I have met/chatted with a few submissives who always seem to choose partners that are, shall we say, not liked by the majority. 
The odd thing is that these women are generally liked by the group at large. 
They are popular, funny, show that they are caring and sensible.. and yet, most I have known have chosen to get involved with dominant partners that are most despised. 
Dominants who if you sit and chat with them a while you have to slap yourself to keep your sanity.  People who are sarcastic, argumentative, sometimes threatening, and never understand any opinion that does not fit with their own.
I know that many of us will find that rare as*hole in our lives.  But what would make someone consistantly find themselves with this type of partner over and over?
What is the draw?  What is the payoff?
Kyst


Perhaps it is as simple as the good girls like bad boys thing, and I have often found nice guys like evil bitches! Not always true of course, and when you get 2 good people together, especially in D/s - you usually have a GREAT relationship.


_____________________________

Mistress Sandy

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I'd rather be hated for something I am than loved for something I am not.


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Profile   Post #: 36
RE: Sacrificial lambs? - 2/25/2008 4:56:07 AM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline 		They can be all sweetness and light while he expresses all the ugly things she thinks of but doesn't say.

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Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!


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Profile   Post #: 37
RE: Sacrificial lambs? - 2/25/2008 5:12:04 AM   
Dnomyar


Posts: 7933
Joined: 6/27/2005
Status: offline 		Damm Im cursed. Im a nice guy. I cant grow a beard. Dosent pay to tear open my shirt. I have no chest hair.  

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Profile   Post #: 38
RE: Sacrificial lambs? - 2/25/2008 5:14:47 AM   
StormsSlave


Posts: 629
Joined: 2/6/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP

They can be all sweetness and light while he expresses all the ugly things she thinks of but doesn't say.


Fair enough.  I like it.

_____________________________

Congratulate me...I'm a missus!!

--nobody's resident anything.

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Profile   Post #: 39
RE: Sacrificial lambs? - 2/25/2008 8:55:41 AM   
BlackPhx


Posts: 3432
Joined: 11/8/2006
Status: offline 		Master grew up in a family of debaters, Lawyer, Legal Secretary/Paralegal,  a sister who has her degree in Sociology and another who is an Artist. He can be abrasive, pedantic, stubborn, and lacking at times in the social niceties that keep people from being rubbed the wrong way at first meeting. A friend who was always at loggerheads with him (they agreed to disagreed more often than agreed), hosted our wedding at which Masters parents were present. Afterwards she said having met his parents, she could better understand why he "is as abrasive and stubborn in getting his points across." That family if you can't stand in a tornado of debate, your blown away like chaff in the wind, and you had better be able to back up your points either in reference books, internet or papers.

The person I love however is far more than what you see here and apparently he sees something in me..despite my stubborn, opinionated, rebellious self.

poenkitten (who can hold her own with his family)

(in reply to Missokyst)
Profile   Post #: 40
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