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Passive synonym for submissive - 10/27/2007 4:55:59 PM   
Prinsexx


Posts: 4584
Joined: 8/27/2007
Status: offline 		Someone just categorically posted in response to me that passive and submissive have the same meaning.

I don't consider I am being passive when I am being submissive.

What do subs here feel about this? Do the dom(me)s here think they want passivity or submission?

If you feel there is a difference then what is the diference between passivity and submission? I know the difference for me but I am, well, quite spechless at The Chauvanist's original resonse.
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RE: Passive synonym for submissive - 10/27/2007 5:00:14 PM   
OsideGirl


Posts: 14449
Joined: 7/1/2005
From: United States
Status: offline 		I agree with you. I'm far from passive when I'm submissive. Unless, his definition of submissive is someone that just lies there and takes it.

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The Accelerated Velocity of Terminological Inexactitude

(in reply to Prinsexx)
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RE: Passive synonym for submissive - 10/27/2007 5:02:42 PM   
writergirl


Posts: 29
Joined: 7/24/2005
Status: offline 		I believe in some cases a submissive must be passive, but I don't think passivity is necessarily a trait of submission. Sometimes a girl (or boy) needs to know when to hold her tongue, or bend with the wind, so to speak. However, I don't believe the act of being submissive must mean being passive as a person.

I am a very indepent, free-thinking woman. I am as aggressive as my Master will allow. Occasionally, it is very, usually it is moderate and sometimes it is not at all. It's according to what He wishes. And perhaps that's the crux... perhaps there's a semantics issue at work. It may be that what the other response was referring to was that a submissive must be malleable. But that doesn't always mean passive.

My .02,
wg

(in reply to Prinsexx)
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RE: Passive synonym for submissive - 10/27/2007 5:02:56 PM   
DiurnalVampire


Posts: 8125
Joined: 1/19/2006
From: Nashville, TN
Status: offline 		If someone wants to deal strictly with the language... they are similiar.
In action and in life, though, there is  ahuge different. Dominants can be passive. Submissives can be passive. Vanillas can be passive.

To submit, you do not always have to be actively makeing efforts, but someone who si consistanly passive gets boring. I want someone who is actively making an effort to make me happy, not simply sitting back and letting me run things and riding the wave that follows. Some dominants might like that, I dont.

My 2 cents
DV


_____________________________

I will be your Dominate if you will be my submit - Fox

Snarko Ergo Sum
If you cannot change your mind, how are you so sure you still have one? -proverb

*Owner of Fox - collared 10/13/07*
VampiresLair

(in reply to Prinsexx)
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RE: Passive synonym for submissive - 10/27/2007 5:04:17 PM   
LuckyAlbatross


Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline 		Most people associate submissive with passive/follower/weaker/waiter while they associate dominant with active/leader/stronger/go-getter.

Obviously those are all just false associations.  While I understand how the associations are made and propogated, they are still false and always will be.

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Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to DiurnalVampire)
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RE: Passive synonym for submissive - 10/27/2007 5:05:10 PM   
Estring


Posts: 3314
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline 		Hmm, slow day huh?

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Boycott Whales!

(in reply to Prinsexx)
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RE: Passive synonym for submissive - 10/27/2007 5:05:22 PM   
ownedgirlie


Posts: 9184
Joined: 2/5/2006
Status: offline 		I did not see the post you are referring to so I will simply reply to your OP.

I can passively submit to my Master, and I can actively submit to my Master.  I am required to do both.

Passive submission:  When he tells me to do ABC and I do ABC.  Or when he wants me to remain in a certian position while he does XYZ to me (it's an alphabetical day).

Active submission:  When I actively go out of my way to do things he will like - offering to run errands and then running them, or to massage him, or recently I went TV shopping for him and gave him a comprehensive comparative list of all the models that fit into the parameters he was looking for in a plasma TV, along with where they were sold and their list prices.

I have heard it said that "Submitting is easy - you just lay there and take what's given to you."  This is a rather ignorant view in my opinion.  Then again, that may be all that some require of their submissives, in which case it is a very accurate view.  It does not define my own slavery, however.

(in reply to Prinsexx)
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RE: Passive synonym for submissive - 10/27/2007 5:06:55 PM   
TheChauvinist


Posts: 76
Joined: 10/14/2006
Status: offline 		Maybe you should seek clarification on the actual context that was being presented. Obviously, Prinexx is easily offended and like to misrepresent how things actually transpired.

Here

(in reply to OsideGirl)
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RE: Passive synonym for submissive - 10/27/2007 5:07:22 PM   
LuckyAlbatross


Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline 		I hear more often the "I just need a space I can go to let go of all the hard responsibilities I have during the day and be able to let someone else be responsible at home"

Blech, not my idea of a good life partner.

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Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to ownedgirlie)
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RE: Passive synonym for submissive - 10/27/2007 5:09:12 PM   
mnottertail


Posts: 60698
Joined: 11/3/2004
Status: offline 		fuckhole is a reasonable passive synonym



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(in reply to TheChauvinist)
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RE: Passive synonym for submissive - 10/27/2007 5:33:57 PM   
Prinsexx


Posts: 4584
Joined: 8/27/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: DiurnalVampire

Dominants can be passive.


Thank you for reminding me of that.
Yum. I love a Dominant's passivity. The lull before the storm.

(in reply to DiurnalVampire)
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RE: Passive synonym for submissive - 10/27/2007 5:35:13 PM   
Prinsexx


Posts: 4584
Joined: 8/27/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: mnottertail

fuckhole is a reasonable passive synonym




Any hole a fuckhole? Is that reasonably passive enough for you?

(in reply to mnottertail)
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RE: Passive synonym for submissive - 10/27/2007 5:38:27 PM   
Prinsexx


Posts: 4584
Joined: 8/27/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: TheChauvinist

Maybe you should seek clarification on the actual context that was being presented. Obviously, Prinexx is easily offended and like to misrepresent how things actually transpired.

Here



Easily offended? Oh how could I possible be so since according to your defintion I am completely passive.

At least you can mail ME to a profile.

There's nothing moe passive than someone who hides.

(in reply to TheChauvinist)
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RE: Passive synonym for submissive - 10/27/2007 5:41:59 PM   
Dragynsfury


Posts: 79
Joined: 10/14/2007
Status: offline 		*chuckles*  Ron, play nice.  Anyone can be passive.  It isn't unique to submissives.  Just as anyone can be aggressive. 

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The artist formerly known as OnyxGoddess

(in reply to Prinsexx)
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RE: Passive synonym for submissive - 10/27/2007 5:58:25 PM   
Prinsexx


Posts: 4584
Joined: 8/27/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Dragynsfury

*chuckles*  Ron, play nice.  Anyone can be passive.  It isn't unique to submissives.  Just as anyone can be aggressive. 


Yes but I recognise passive aggression when I see it. You obviously know who The Chauvinist truly is. Please pass on this message:
Come Out and Play.

(in reply to Dragynsfury)
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RE: Passive synonym for submissive - 10/27/2007 6:34:22 PM   
chellekitty


Posts: 3923
Joined: 3/27/2005
Status: offline 		many words we use in this lifestyle do not coincide with their dictionary definitions.....or synonyms....

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One thing I know: the only ones among you who will be really happy are those who will have sought and found how to serve. ~Albert Schweitzer

(in reply to Prinsexx)
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RE: Passive synonym for submissive - 10/27/2007 6:34:28 PM   
tricia


Posts: 231
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline 		I'm not sure why you find the term passive so offensive.
 
I am a passive person.
 
Perhaps i am also passive in my submission.  I don't view it as "someone who lies there and just takes it" -- but as someone who obeys without question or resistence.  My Master prefers it that way.
 
I'm more than capable of making a decision and when applicable, i choose not to.
 
I'm also a 'passive' person who happens to be a fully functioning adult.  One who doesn't hide from responsibility.
 
I find the implication that being passive means cowering in the corner while everyone shits all over you  - offensive.

(in reply to Prinsexx)
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RE: Passive synonym for submissive - 10/27/2007 6:35:23 PM   
chellekitty


Posts: 3923
Joined: 3/27/2005
Status: offline 		it is offensive because not all submissives are passive....

edited to add: and furthermore, as pointed out earlier in this post, Dominants can be and are passive as well...it does not negate their Dominance...


< Message edited by chellekitty -- 10/27/2007 6:36:28 PM >

_____________________________

One thing I know: the only ones among you who will be really happy are those who will have sought and found how to serve. ~Albert Schweitzer

(in reply to tricia)
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RE: Passive synonym for submissive - 10/27/2007 6:38:56 PM   
tricia


Posts: 231
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline 		I clicked on "here" before writing my response -- i think what he said was passive and submissive are synonyms of each other -- and they are.  Did i miss where he said all submissives are passive?


(in reply to chellekitty)
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RE: Passive synonym for submissive - 10/27/2007 6:43:05 PM   
RosesHaveThorns


Posts: 312
Joined: 10/14/2007
Status: offline
quote:

Assertive and passive are antonyms.
Dominant and submissive are antonyms.

Dominance != Assertive
Submissive != Passive


This is taken from the other thread, but I didn't really want to derail that one.

The issue with words is that they carry with them connotations, which vary from person to person. Thin is not the same as svelte is not the same as gaunt. Compromise is another good example. You can reach a compromise, and you can compromise someone else's integrity. In the first case, the word is like agreement, in the other, it is more like sully.

In my opinion, passive is a doormat or a sub who falls asleep midway. They're passive, they're not resisting...Or doing much of anything, perhaps other then snoring.

I see submission as a much more active thing, as you choose WHO to submit to, you choose to follow their rules, even when it's awkward or annoying. You try to please the master, and you do react during activities. Your reaction may be dependent on the master/dom, but you are also mentally engaged with the whole process. And some people like subs who fight back!

(in reply to chellekitty)
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