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Contact and Compatibility - 9/3/2007 10:29:08 PM   
iammachine


Posts: 1549
Joined: 1/25/2006
Status: offline 		At the request of MisPandora, I'm starting this as a new thread. My very first thread start, woo!

This came from one of the many discussions about transactional, pro, and financial domination, but I think my question has the potential for a wider scope. I've edited my original comment very slightly to encompass a broader relevance.

So here goes!

ORIGINAL: iammachine

What possesses someone to contact someone they know from the get go is not compatible?


Discuss!


_____________________________

I still hear you scream... in every breath, every single motion
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: Contact and Compatibility - 9/3/2007 10:35:05 PM   
breatheasone


Posts: 4004
Joined: 7/14/2007
Status: offline 		Perhaps they just want sex.

_____________________________

Romans 10:13,For whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved.
Mike posts in black font
candy posts in pink font

(in reply to iammachine)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: Contact and Compatibility - 9/3/2007 10:36:27 PM   
came4U


Posts: 3572
Joined: 1/23/2007
From: London, Ontario
Status: offline 		Contact as in a friendly hello or a positive comment on their profile is quite welcomed in my experience.

But, if the actual differences are obvious and they contact in attempt to enduce some sort of connection of a romantic or D/s sense, it is a waste of time and the person who solicited such contact shouldn't be insulted by a negative response.

(in reply to iammachine)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: Contact and Compatibility - 9/3/2007 10:48:56 PM   
BitaTruble


Posts: 9779
Joined: 1/12/2006
From: Texas
Status: offline 		Some people believe they are the 'exception' and don't need to fit the criteria of given profiles. Others are desperate which is often why male submissives will contact female submissives and hope they'll turn dominant for them. Still others are new and don't recognize their incompatibility since we all just a bunch of pervs so we must be into what they're into and as long as one of the kinks is a commonality, that's good enough for a whole relationship. I could probably go on for a very long time, but there are just too many reasons to list them all. ;)

Celeste

_____________________________

"Oh, so it's just like
Rock, paper, scissors."

He laughed. "You are the wisest woman I know."


(in reply to came4U)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: Contact and Compatibility - 9/3/2007 11:23:07 PM   
iammachine


Posts: 1549
Joined: 1/25/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: breatheasone

Perhaps they just want sex.


There's the rub. For example, in my profile, I'm pretty vocal that the likelihood of my hopping in the sack with anyone is pretty abysmal.

So, should someone want a sexual relationship, what would possess someone to contact me with that agenda clearly in mind?

This concept, of course, can apply to a lot of circumstances, not just sex, but that's a damn convenient one! :)


_____________________________

I still hear you scream... in every breath, every single motion

(in reply to breatheasone)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: Contact and Compatibility - 9/3/2007 11:25:44 PM   
adoracat


Posts: 1779
Joined: 2/16/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: iammachine

quote:

ORIGINAL: breatheasone

Perhaps they just want sex.


There's the rub. For example, in my profile, I'm pretty vocal that the likelihood of my hopping in the sack with anyone is pretty abysmal.

So, should someone want a sexual relationship, what would possess someone to contact me with that agenda clearly in mind?

This concept, of course, can apply to a lot of circumstances, not just sex, but that's a damn convenient one! :)



because its the same thing some guys think about lesbian women "oh but that person hasnt me ME yet!  i'll overcome all of those silly 'not gonna fuck you' issues and they'll fall in the sack and be GRATEFUL to me!"

i've heard that sort of thing before, yep!

kitten

(in reply to iammachine)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: Contact and Compatibility - 9/3/2007 11:52:09 PM   
iammachine


Posts: 1549
Joined: 1/25/2006
Status: offline 		<FR>
Thanks for the input so far everyone! I'll be back tomorrow for your posting [dis?]pleasure!


_____________________________

I still hear you scream... in every breath, every single motion

(in reply to adoracat)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: Contact and Compatibility - 9/3/2007 11:53:48 PM   
Damocles809


Posts: 532
Joined: 7/12/2006
Status: offline 		Hmmmm, maybe conversation?  

I've often said hello or made a friendly comment about someone's profile. 

And I get the knee-jerk reponse of 'hellooo!  I said I'm only looking for friends, that means no guys!'

(in reply to adoracat)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: Contact and Compatibility - 9/4/2007 1:31:31 AM   
HalloweenWhite


Posts: 1028
Joined: 6/20/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: iammachine

At the request of MisPandora, I'm starting this as a new thread. My very first thread start, woo!

This came from one of the many discussions about transactional, pro, and financial domination, but I think my question has the potential for a wider scope. I've edited my original comment very slightly to encompass a broader relevance.

So here goes!

ORIGINAL: iammachine

What possesses someone to contact someone they know from the get go is not compatible?


Discuss!



Lust and wishful thinking, perhaps?.

(in reply to iammachine)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: Contact and Compatibility - 9/4/2007 1:48:49 AM   
e01n


Posts: 1472
Status: offline 		Me, I'm looking for friends. Period.

So chances are I'll make a point of making that clear, mentioning whatever it was that made you seem interesting enough to contact and whatever hoop has been embedded in the profile for me to jump through to prove that I'm sincere and have bothered to read about someone before asking them a question.

Even then, I often am met with charming things like "U R TEH DOMINATE $4 Me" and "Hello my name is blessing,iam tall and sexy looking young girl, after reading your profile,i will like to have a relationship with you, can you write me at..." My favorite: "It is more to me than my beauty my pretty smile my light brown eyes. I am living life according to my standard, I bear no demand on men for materialistic things or other items. I am a God fearing woman who Love God with all of my being...."

Or even better - silence. Then again, no response is a response. Kind of disheartening, but it makes sense in a sick way.

What I'm more confused about are those users who have 1 profile up saying that they're sub and another saying they're ProDom. I'm not against them or capitalism in the least, don't misunderstand. I'm simply curious as to which one is the person I'm talking to. I know which one I emailed, but am I talking to her, or the other her?

<sigh>

(in reply to HalloweenWhite)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: Contact and Compatibility - 9/4/2007 3:36:35 AM   
Bobkgin


Posts: 1335
Joined: 7/28/2007
From: Kawarthas, Ontario, Canada
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: iammachine

What possesses someone to contact someone they know from the get go is not compatible?



Desperation.

Any contact is better than no contact, for some.

_____________________________

When all is said and done, what will you regret?

That you never really lived?

Or there was so much living left to do?

For those interested: pics and poetry have been added to my profile.

(in reply to iammachine)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: Contact and Compatibility - 9/4/2007 4:36:40 AM   
IrishMist


Posts: 7480
Joined: 11/17/2005
Status: offline
quote:

What possesses someone to contact someone they know from the get go is not compatible?

The small possibility that just maybe...just maybe...they may be wrong and the compatibility issue will be overcome.
or
They just want to get laid and could care less about compatibility issues

_____________________________

If I said something to offend you, please tell me what it was so that I can say it again later.


(in reply to iammachine)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: Contact and Compatibility - 9/4/2007 5:03:12 AM   
Satyr6406


Posts: 820
Joined: 3/27/2006
From: New Brunswick, N.J.
Status: offline 		I have had people contact me that seem to have an issue with something on my profile but, instead of assuming that we are on different wave-lengths, they wish to ask/discuss what I meant when I posted my profile regarding whatever issue it is.
 
I'll get specific, here: I have a profile on a BDSM website and I don't really like to indulge in BDSM activities. This draws questions that can be answered but, it starts a dialogue which can sometimes lead to some better understanding or, just a friendship between people of semi-like-minded ideas.
 
 
 
 
 
Peace and comfort,
 
 
 
 
 
Michael

_____________________________

Peace and comfort,


Michael

Former Vice-President Gore didn't invent the internet but, he DID make up global warming!

(in reply to IrishMist)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: Contact and Compatibility - 9/4/2007 5:04:48 AM   
desiroustoserve


Posts: 17
Joined: 8/18/2007
Status: offline 		I agree with a couple of posters that its possibly desperation.  As with all experiences you live and learn.  Eventually you have to start looking at yourself when those compatibility issues keep arising.  I'm sure we all have gone through a period where you overlook it because its tough to find someone that you have chemistry with and connect with.  I've been fortunate enough to find that but eventually the compatibility issues will rear its ugly head.  Some people will recognize it and most people wont.  Its just easier to have someone. 

Alot of Doms on CM are offended that some subs state on here exactly what they are looking for.  To me that is a sign of a healthy submissive.  Compatibility will at some point become an issue if its not looked hard at from the very beginning. 

(in reply to iammachine)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: Contact and Compatibility - 9/4/2007 5:10:28 AM   
DiurnalVampire


Posts: 8125
Joined: 1/19/2006
From: Nashville, TN
Status: offline 		For me, I get a lot of the "exceptions".
Obviously I am not looking only becasue someone wonderful enough to turn my head hasnt come along yet. Obviously I dont realize that someone better than Angel exists until they present themselves.
There is also the assumption here in this thread that someone actually read the profile before contacting and knows there is mention of incompatibility.   Thats a very big assumption, and quite often really offbase.
Many of the ones I get mail from (male and female, D and s) havent actually taken the time to read the profile and havent a clue what would or wouldnt be copatible or what I might be looking for.  They see a profile, assume I am looking and interested and figure they will find out what for after they offer and I accept.

DV


_____________________________

I will be your Dominate if you will be my submit - Fox

Snarko Ergo Sum
If you cannot change your mind, how are you so sure you still have one? -proverb

*Owner of Fox - collared 10/13/07*
VampiresLair

(in reply to Satyr6406)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: Contact and Compatibility - 9/4/2007 5:14:44 AM   
caught4u


Posts: 132
Joined: 5/25/2007
Status: offline 		they could be emotional masochists

_____________________________

"Be Yourself - Everyone Else is Taken"


~owned by Master of Wind~

(in reply to DiurnalVampire)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: Contact and Compatibility - 9/4/2007 6:02:31 AM   
desiroustoserve


Posts: 17
Joined: 8/18/2007
Status: offline 		lol.. that basically sums it up in a nutshell. 

(in reply to caught4u)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: Contact and Compatibility - 9/4/2007 7:11:54 AM   
missturbation


Posts: 8290
Joined: 2/12/2006
From: another planet
Status: offline 		Opposites attract

_____________________________

What you don't witness with your eyes, don't witness with your mouth. Proverb.

If it fit's in a toaster, i can cook it.

Buying 10 item's or less is not shopping !!

(in reply to desiroustoserve)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: Contact and Compatibility - 9/4/2007 7:14:06 AM   
LATEXBABY64


Posts: 2107
Joined: 4/8/2004
Status: offline 		i treat everyone with open and equal opportunity. Till they give me reason not to then i become the exorcist

(in reply to missturbation)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: Contact and Compatibility - 9/4/2007 10:21:26 AM   
iammachine


Posts: 1549
Joined: 1/25/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: HalloweenWhite

quote:

ORIGINAL: iammachine

At the request of MisPandora, I'm starting this as a new thread. My very first thread start, woo!

This came from one of the many discussions about transactional, pro, and financial domination, but I think my question has the potential for a wider scope. I've edited my original comment very slightly to encompass a broader relevance.

So here goes!

ORIGINAL: iammachine

What possesses someone to contact someone they know from the get go is not compatible?


Discuss!



Lust and wishful thinking, perhaps?.


Blinders, check. :)


_____________________________

I still hear you scream... in every breath, every single motion

(in reply to HalloweenWhite)
Profile   Post #: 20
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