The TRUTH?

The TRUTH? (Full Version)

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LotusSong -> The TRUTH? (7/27/2007 2:10:11 PM)
.. you (might not be able to) HANDLE the Truth! Be honest guys.. what drew you to D/s? The promise of a female that would do whatever you want, never say no and multiple sex partners? Were you drawn by a need to teach and nurture another for their self improvement? Ladies- your turn: What drew you? Same questions as above.

LaTigresse -> RE: The TRUTH? (7/27/2007 2:15:53 PM)
The easy answer would be.... a woman. The more complex answer would be......the intensity of this type of relationship and the way it pushes me to be better. In another relationship I feel like I can coast, kinda do it on auto-pilot. Hold alot of myself back. With this, I feel more responsible, stronger and more complete. It makes me feel more like me, if that makes any sense.

beargonewild -> RE: The TRUTH? (7/27/2007 2:16:13 PM)
Neither. To fulfill a need and craving to submit to another and thus gaining a sense of being more "complete."

cumulus -> RE: The TRUTH? (7/27/2007 2:17:08 PM)
I'm not sure I understand the question. I wasn't drawn to D/s. I live it. It's me. It's my life. It's my vanilla. It's my kink. It just is. Coincidentally, there's a microcosm of the world that shares my interests. It happens to have a label or two. One of them is "D/s".

SusanofO -> RE: The TRUTH? (7/27/2007 2:17:35 PM)
About 5-6 years ago (I forget how long ago, exactly) I accidentally found a site on the Internet about BDSM. It was the "DungeonNet" site. I was fascinated by it, and I just kept reading - all night long. It sounded like such a turn-on, I actually ended up doing things I wouldn't normally do to see if I would really appreciate BDSM. Like arranging to meet someone I didn't know that well at all, really, who wanted to "play with me". It felt wonderful to me - I felt totally wonderful "scening" for the first time. It felt like something I'd been missing for years had "clicked" into place, finally. I've been hooked ever since. I am a Switch, so I will first tell why I wanted to be a submissive: I loved the feeling of someone over-powering me, and being in a position to inflict some pain. I am also drawn by certain aspects of Humiliation, and non-sexual service. I dunno why, I really don't. I've felt this way since I was about 10 years old, though. I like taking care of people. It's just who I am, I guess. I actually like cooking, cleaning, and housework-type stuff (am I nuts? hehe). In that context, the idea of doing it as part of a power-exchange, it's a real turn-on for me, for some reason. The way BDSM melds with sex just is so delicious to me, really. It's fantastic. I don't really think I will ever look at "Vanilla" sex tha same way again (although I can occasionally enjoy "Vanilla" sex). I really love the idea of being protected and cared for. I really, truly appreciate that aspect of Mascunility (for me anyway, I am straight), whether it comes from male Doms, or male subs. I have no brothers, only sisters, in my family-of-origin, and while I love my real father dearly, and he's a great guy (he really, truly is), he was never what I'd call "over-protective" - so maybe I missed that while growing up, and I am now "making up for it" somehow, I dunno. I also liked the idea of being able to emotionally lean on someone I know would (supposedly) have my best interests at heart. As far as occasionally being drawn to wanting to act as a FemDom, my reasoning is: What's not to like? I mean Geez - having a guy around who is that into you, and willing and wanting to please you all the time? I also appreciate FemDom because I have "bossy" aspects to my personality that don't seem to get quelled totally, even when I am in "sub" mode. I guess "bossy" isn't the right word. Maybe "decisive" is the right word, because I am not obnoxious about expressing my opinion, really. As a FemDom, I can just let that "side" of me out, and not worry about it, as that aspect of my personality then seems to have an acceptable, even very appreciated, "outlet". - Susan

ownedgirlie -> RE: The TRUTH? (7/27/2007 2:19:29 PM)
I grew up this way.

Politesub53 -> RE: The TRUTH? (7/27/2007 2:20:29 PM)
BDSM fanatasies were the first attraction, more the roleplay type than being whipped. A woman i know, knew i had these thoughts, and taught me all about D/s. My first recollection of anything slightly into BDSM was a girlfriend who bit my tongue if i tried to kiss her, yet we both knew i would keep trying. She enjoyed teasing and i think i enjoyed the pain just a tad. [;)]

AquaticSub -> RE: The TRUTH? (7/27/2007 2:22:28 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LotusSong Ladies- your turn: What drew you? Same questions as above. Sex. Then I realized I liked the lifestyle aspect as well.

LuckyAlbatross -> RE: The TRUTH? (7/27/2007 2:24:27 PM)
Well there's the "I have no idea, I've always been kinky" answer. Then there's the "Looking for cybersex OMG this is so awesome and hot and fun" answer. And then there's the "OMG I can have it ALL? Poly? Kink? Service? Sex? YES!" answer. All are true.

earthycouple -> RE: The TRUTH? (7/27/2007 2:25:29 PM)
Life.

BitaTruble -> RE: The TRUTH? (7/27/2007 2:30:35 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LotusSong .. you (might not be able to) HANDLE the Truth! Be honest guys.. what drew you to D/s? The promise of a female that would do whatever you want, never say no and multiple sex partners? Were you drawn by a need to teach and nurture another for their self improvement? Ladies- your turn: What drew you? Same questions as above. I didn't think I was good enough for normal people.. so the freaks, pervs and deviants where all that I had left and it was better than nothing. It took awhile, but I discovered that freaks, pervs and deviants were a pretty good bunch of people and actually more normal than most of the normals! Well, that and the pirates. I read way too much Rosemary Rogers as a kid. [8D] You know, being forced to do exactly what you want to do but not having to be responsible for wanting it. Back then, that worked really well for me. Celeste

MadRabbit -> RE: The TRUTH? (7/27/2007 2:34:13 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LotusSong The promise of a female that would do whatever you want, never say no? Were you drawn by a need to teach and nurture another for their self improvement? Its a mixture of both of these, minus the multiple sex partners part.

shadevarr -> RE: The TRUTH? (7/27/2007 2:40:06 PM)
My very first sexual experiences were kinky and that just set the tone to it all. Vanilla does nothing more than bore me. It's bad when you start reading a book mid-fuck, but the humiliation aspect did make it enjoyable in that regard :D

slaveish -> RE: The TRUTH? (7/27/2007 2:42:16 PM)
I have been submissive my whole life but learned very early on that I had to take care of myself, cover up that part of me and take charge of my life, Dominate my way through my world and my circumstances so that no one could hurt me. I couldn't figure out what that ache was, that sorrow, that missing piece which I tried to cover up with negative vices. It gnawed at me, constantly. I couldn't drink it away, smoke it away, pill it away, or fuck it away. Then an inadvertant statement from a man I didn't know was a Dom (until that moment) cemented it all. It all fit. I found peace - at last. I am simply submissive, and now I embrace it, celebrate it, ~wallow~ in it because it is so glorious. The kink is a bonus.

MadRabbit -> RE: The TRUTH? (7/27/2007 2:56:32 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: slaveish The kink is a bonus. I feal the same way. Although...only some of it was a bonus. A lot of "being a Top" was almost a chore to me and led to me losing interest in actually practicing and scening. M/S is where my desire has always lied and the kinky sex that revolves around it is the icing on the cake. P.S. I would have given some longer, deeper responses to these questions about how M/S strings cords in my own soul, but I am simply too tired from the gym..

velvetears -> RE: The TRUTH? (7/27/2007 3:36:17 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: BitaTruble I read way too much Rosemary Rogers as a kid. [8D] Celeste LOL... i read all her books as well as Johanna Lindsay.

Cyntilating -> RE: The TRUTH? (7/27/2007 4:09:03 PM)
My father and mother. The dynamics that I drew up in and was raised by, was watching them and the roles they had in our household..> my Dad was very much a dominant and a patriarch of the family.. He was strong and secure and in control of himself and his surroundings.. a quiet commanding presence . My mother was very much the strong, supportive submissive to his dominance, making his home, take care of the children, have his dinner on the table and slippers at his chair when he got home from work, kind of dynamic....she took care of his needs and he provided for her and his family..... obviously I am not talking about the sex part.. it was the emotional and mental dynamic, it was natural to them ( it was the 50s also LOL days of june and ward clever and wally and the beav households.. ) Interestingly enough> I didnt marry a man like that.....WANTED one like that ...but instead I " found" a wounded bird who needed me..and who I could "take care of"....... sigh... ya years of therapy about that one ..but I finally could understand why I did what I did..and chose what I chose... anyway..I digress.. and in my 30s I worked with a woman, we were friends in the office...close...and she invited me to her home one weekend.....she was married to a wonderful man, and she was a wonderful woman, they had a great relationship> when I spent time with them together I saw " THE DYNAMIC " ...didnt know the term for it...didnt know anything about bdsm... but what I saw was a deep respect for one another, an obvious role dynamic that made me think of my parents love and devotion to one another > and the man ( her husband ) pushed a button in my brain that I didnt even know was there ( and he obviously didnt mean to do it ) .. I couldnt wait to get to work that next week to ask a zillion questions about what I had seen in their household and learn more about her "way" of responding to him...why she did what she did? and why I felt it between my ears as well as my thighs when I watched it taking place... lol I was so glad she didnt get offended..and I am forever in her debt for answering every last one of my silly probing questions.. so I came to " the lifestyle" through the back door I guess.. the mental and emotional dynamic> rather than the whips and chains and sex stuff.. that came later ....grinz. great question...thanks for asking it.. Cyndi

MasterMataeo -> RE: The TRUTH? (7/27/2007 4:15:26 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LotusSong .. you (might not be able to) HANDLE the Truth! Be honest guys.. what drew you to D/s? The promise of a female that would do whatever you want, never say no and multiple sex partners? Were you drawn by a need to teach and nurture another for their self improvement? Ladies- your turn: What drew you? Same questions as above. lets see what drew me in to D/s, well at first i would have to say it was shortly after my first sexual encounter,, for my first one was a bit aggressive, both ways,, and well afterward her and i talked about it and realized that we both liked it rough and continued to experiment from there,, and i found out shortly after hat that I rather enjoyed being Dominate,, and she found out she was a Switch and was Bi but it could have gone back to as far as second grade ,, when there was that cute girl on the playground ,, and she said catch me if you can ,, and when you did she said ,, now what,, who knows,,, I was drawn to it by the experimentation and the open-mindedness with the knowledge of history that most great cultures had some form of BDSM within them and that ours is no different so why not give it a try,, for as the saying goes,,, "Try anything once, Twice if you like it, Three times to make sure, Four makes it a habit, and five...a Fetish" so all in all it was for a mixture of both reasons, for self improvement by teaching one and by learning myself from the teachings that i give and the the teachings even a sub/slave can teach a Master/ess//Dom/me, and that is my opinion and experience and for the mental and sexual stimulation of knowing that the sub/slave is doing it as a gift of pleasure and need as well As I am giving the Gift of Dominance as well as fulfilling that primal need,, but as said, not just for myself,, for I believe as well that for a healthy relationship things are like a Ying to a Yang,, there must be that balance for my interior harmony and the same for my ideal sub/salve, to allow the ability to be in harmony with each other and ones self,, for a Fulfilling relationship hope that makes sense,, MasterMataeo

maledave7 -> RE: The TRUTH? (7/27/2007 4:19:11 PM)
I am soft spoken in nature. I have always thought of a dominant woman as being beautiful and sexy. I enjoy having the woman to lead and for me to follow her.

MistressSassy66 -> RE: The TRUTH? (7/27/2007 4:43:59 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LotusSong .. you (might not be able to) HANDLE the Truth! Be honest guys.. what drew you to D/s? The promise of a female that would do whatever you want, never say no and multiple sex partners? Were you drawn by a need to teach and nurture another for their self improvement? Ladies- your turn: What drew you? Same questions as above. There are a few things,the 1st being the need to teach. I was shown a path (finally) when I read a book called The Good Girls Guide to Female Dominance... It opened My eyes to what and who I am. Not to mention the courage to do it. Then the P/people I met drew Me in further. Now the more I practice My talents the more I want to do them. The better I get at those the more I want to delve deeper. While sometimes I do need the break I mentioned elsewhere.. I cant stay away completely. the more I love it

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