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RE: does it get better? - 4/24/2007 11:06:36 AM

pattayonacracker

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your so young! dont be so down about life embrace it for what it is, a learning experience, a path that we are set on by a higher being than we are, go with it, dont fight it, look for the positive and change about you what you dont like in yourself, remember you cant change anyone but yourself, stop hoping that people will change and go for the ones who fit you, fit what and who you are looking for, and remember that true beauty lies within, not on the outter skin. Be true to yourself and be happy in your own skin and happiness will have no choice but to find you, the old saying that misery loves company is oh so true. so why give it the company it seeks, be happy and go out there and knock em for a loop!
i just got comfortable in my own skin with who i am and i will be 43 in 2 months,,, tell you anything?
good luck, and have some fun getting there!

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RE: does it get better? - 4/24/2007 11:59:58 AM

CreativeDominant

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quote:

ORIGINAL: kate

maybe it is my youth talking.... but i can't understand why i keep getting disapointed.... it just feels like everyone is the same in the long run.... and everybody is looking for the same things i am....and nobody is finding it.... i guess my question is...does the disapointment go away...or do you just learn to live with it?

Sometimes kate, a person lets romantic optimism get in the way. Iam a romantic and an optimist. I recognize that within myself even as I see the pragmatic health care professional who is also cautious in his personal life in many, many areas...except when meeting people. Then I can sometimes let myself trust people to an extent that ends up costing me in the end. If I were smarter, perhaps I would be more cynical and distrustful. But I just don't want to approach life that way...so I live and learn and am more cautious and wary. I do not trust the way I used to...and probably trust more than I should.

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RE: does it get better? - 4/24/2007 12:19:48 PM

BossyShoeBitch

Posts: 3931
Joined: 1/13/2007
From: South Florida
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quote:

ORIGINAL: kate

i am just let down so often.... everything i attempt i fail at eventually...no matter how well it is going, it always falls through.... i guess i am just at the point o giving up

Kate,
Two small points I'd like to make if I may. First, the words everything, nothing and always are pretty powerful words that people tend to use very casually. There are few things in life that are absolute. Do you give yourself credit for those things you accomplish but won't allow yourself to recognize as something special? That one friend who knows they can always count on you and will always be there for you; Getting a good grade; Helping those less fortunate than yourself; Even keeping your room neat and tidy. These are but few examples of the building blocks to a happier and more fullfilled life.
Second, if you make yourself believe that you will fail, you will fail. And you have created a self fullfilling prophecy. Are you setting yourself up for failure by setting your goals too high? I'll just use the easiest example here: After I had each of my children, I looked at the scale and thought, "I need to lose 50 pounds. I would go on a diet and if I hadn't lost at least 5 or 10 pounds within the first 10 days, I got frustrated and started eating junk again.
It was when I decided to set smaller and more realistic goals for myself (ie:10 pounds in a month) that I began to actually feel like I had accomplished something.

If you think you are alone in feeling this way, you aren't. Even those people you look at and think "Good for them, but why not me?" Are feeling (or have felt) the same thing. Jusy know that you are never alone, there is always someone to talk to.
-BSB

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A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty.

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RE: does it get better? - 4/24/2007 12:23:59 PM

BossyShoeBitch

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From: South Florida
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quote:

ORIGINAL: pattayonacracker

i just got comfortable in my own skin with who i am and i will be 43 in 2 months,,, tell you anything?

pattay,
That just proves the point I made in my previous post to Kate. I just turned 40 and it's only within the last few years that I became comfortable in my own skin and really learned who I am as a person.

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A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty.

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Post #: 24

RE: does it get better? - 4/24/2007 12:40:12 PM

Shylahgirl

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Joined: 8/28/2006
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quote:

ORIGINAL: kate

maybe it is my youth talking.... but i can't understand why i keep getting disapointed.... it just feels like everyone is the same in the long run.... and everybody is looking for the same things i am....and nobody is finding it.... i guess my question is...does the disapointment go away...or do you just learn to live with it?

Can you clearify what you are disapointed with?

Is it play? D/s? Life in genural?

Shylah

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RE: does it get better? - 4/24/2007 1:33:09 PM

soultoshare

Posts: 519
Joined: 8/24/2006
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Kate,

take heart...life is constantly changing. As others have said, take stock of your life, try to figure out what patterns in your life cause you to think you fail. You make your own destiny......grab life by the balls, and don't be afraid of changing it. Don't be afraid to be selfish, there is nothing wrong with that. But learn to be happy with yourself, and you've cleared the biggest hurdle.....at 46, i've finally realized that. Learn to appreciate being by yourself, to enjoy your own company. Make a life for yourself before looking to add another to it. Each experience you have is one more lesson learned........sometimes, i've had to learn it more than once!

It was when i actually stopped looking that i found "the One". I too was asking myself "will it ever get better?" The answer to the questions is a resounding, GOD YES!!!!! You have your life ahead of you, make the most of it.

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RE: does it get better? - 4/24/2007 2:58:04 PM

kate

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Joined: 1/10/2004
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thanks everyone....i guess i can't expect to amek something from nothing...if i want things to cange i'll have to change them.....now all i have to do is figure ou how... thanks again

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Post #: 27

RE: does it get better? - 4/24/2007 4:48:43 PM

subfever

Posts: 2895
Joined: 5/22/2004
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quote:

ORIGINAL: kate

maybe it is my youth talking.... but i can't understand why i keep getting disapointed.... it just feels like everyone is the same in the long run.... and everybody is looking for the same things i am....and nobody is finding it.... i guess my question is...does the disapointment go away...or do you just learn to live with it?

What is it that "everyone" is looking for, and "nobody" is finding?

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Post #: 28

RE: does it get better? - 4/24/2007 4:54:45 PM

michaelOfGeorgia

Posts: 4253
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quote:

ORIGINAL: kate

maybe it is my youth talking.... but i can't understand why i keep getting disapointed.... it just feels like everyone is the same in the long run.... and everybody is looking for the same things i am....and nobody is finding it.... i guess my question is...does the disapointment go away...or do you just learn to live with it?

all i can say is we all have to live with it. as far as i've discovered, it doesn't get any better...but i've had so many disappointments, i've become a pessimist

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RE: does it get better? - 4/24/2007 7:48:18 PM

smcontrol

Posts: 33
Joined: 4/9/2007
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It'll totally get better for you kate... For instance one day you'll "GET" why all these people keep on insisting on pointing out how young you are at twenty-one. I guess life would be easier if you knew the answers the moment you had the question but I'm not sure it would be the ride you'd want.

You will keep learning and growing and you'll start to be able to get a feel for what it is you want and need in a Master (assuming that you're submissive that is; sorry but I'm too deep into the post to let the facts get in the way).

For once every thing that everyone has said in response to your question has been worth hearing.

But perfect person who totally gets you sexually and emotionally may take a little more time. And that person will come for you when the time is right. Until then relax and enjoy the ride.

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Michael

"The world breaks everyone and afterward many are strong in the broken places. But those that will not break it kills."

Ernest Hemingway, 1929

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RE: does it get better? - 4/24/2007 11:12:05 PM

WhiplashSmile

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Joined: 6/8/2004
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quote:

ORIGINAL: kate

thanks everyone....i guess i can't expect to amek something from nothing...if i want things to cange i'll have to change them.....now all i have to do is figure ou how... thanks again

First ask yourself is this something you can change or not? You mentioned something in a previous post about people not keeping their word. This sounds more like a problem with the type of people you met or have in your life. Do people every dissapoint others at times, yes. It all depends to what extent and to what level. If it's tripping you up, you either need to change the way you deal with it, or change the type of people you have in your life.

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Post #: 31