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RE: Difference between M/S and D/s - 4/19/2007 4:06:10 PM   
thetammyjo


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Archer

Personally I draw the line at when the person considers themselves OWNED or is seeking to be in the immediate future.

Ownership is the dividing line.
Submit without being owned submissive
Submit with being owned slave.

One can claim all day long that they are owned but not a slave but the meaning of the word owned contradicts their definition.

Feel free to disagree as I feel free to think you fail to grasp English, LOL.



I actually agree with you, Archer.

I think feeling owned and having someone who feels they are your owner is really about the best definition one can give since we do not live in a society that supports these relationships, all we have are our feelings and definitions that we agree upon.

I think the problem comes when someone has negative reactions to the word "slave" -- Fox went through that about two years into my ownership. It was a change in his opinion of himself and his paying too much attention to what others thought. We worked through it for months but he had to feel comfortable with the identity as a slave and learn to say "bugger off" when anyone gave him a hard time.

Funny thing was that the people in the local bdsm community had far more problems with him identify as a slave than any of our vanilla friends did. Our vanilla friends just saw as another title set like boy/girlfriend or husband/wife; the kinky folks felt the need to try and define it and judge it.

Rather ironic.

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And my LJ where I post fiction in progress if you "friend" me at http://thetammyjo.livejournal.com/

(in reply to Archer)
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RE: Difference between M/S and D/s - 4/19/2007 4:40:28 PM   
MadRabbit


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quote:

ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross

quote:

ORIGINAL: PrincessEllie
I didn't say I was right! It's just the way I've seen it done in the past and the way I've seen the terms translated.

I know, the problem with any definition is that I can always through up some exceptions.


This is why I've stopped trying to define or differentate between the two and am just looking for a partner who is compatible with the things I want out of a relationship. Slave is simply what I call it.

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(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)
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RE: Difference between M/S and D/s - 4/19/2007 4:47:24 PM   
CreativeDominant


Posts: 11032
Joined: 3/11/2006
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quote:

ORIGINAL: PrincessEllie

The way I translate it is this...
D/s - Not 24/7 and the sub can change the contract and decide not to do things

M/s - 24/7 live in relationship and the slave cannot decide not to do things [ie, no safewords]



I have been in a live-in relationship where I was called My Sir and recognized as her master and she as my submissive.  It was 24/7 living.  The submissive could change the contract but only at the agreed upon length of time.  For us, as it was the beginning of the relationship, that was every 3 months.  At the end of 6 months, I sent her home ...as discussed on here before. 


(in reply to PrincessEllie)
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RE: Difference between M/S and D/s - 4/23/2007 5:56:48 PM   
OfHonestValue


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I agree with what Archer said.


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RE: Difference between M/S and D/s - 4/23/2007 6:02:06 PM   
julietsierra


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lol...I actually like that differentiation very much Archer.

So...here's what I am.
I am the ms/s (masochistic submissive/slave) involved in a M/s relationship where in D/s is a HUGE component.

*grin* I get to be it ALL baby!!! (except that Master/Dominant person)

juliet

(in reply to Archer)
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RE: Difference between M/S and D/s - 4/23/2007 7:48:31 PM   
juliaoceania


Posts: 21383
Joined: 4/19/2006
From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
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quote:

ORIGINAL: PrincessEllie

The way I translate it is this...
D/s - Not 24/7 and the sub can change the contract and decide not to do things




Can I show this to my Daddy the next time I do not feel like doing what I am told? Just so he knows I get to pick and choose which orders I follow...

Edited for what could be misunderstood as snarkiness when I was just making a joke...lol 

< Message edited by juliaoceania -- 4/23/2007 7:51:17 PM >


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(in reply to PrincessEllie)
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RE: Difference between M/S and D/s - 4/23/2007 7:58:15 PM   
imthatacheyouhav


Posts: 1259
Joined: 4/16/2007
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"What we have here...is a failure to communicate."  Cool Hand Luke....

(in reply to juliaoceania)
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RE: Difference between M/S and D/s - 4/23/2007 8:35:10 PM   
minnetar


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quote:

ORIGINAL: OfHonestValue

So I read this article that stated that a masochist is not a sub/slave. So is there a difference between having a S/M and a D/s and M/s  relationship? Do the relationships intretwine with each other? 


i believe definitions are the hardest thing in D/s because noone can agree and each is dependant on the dynamic.

minnetar

(in reply to OfHonestValue)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: Difference between M/S and D/s - 4/23/2007 10:32:41 PM   
MistressMelissa


Posts: 226
Joined: 11/21/2004
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quote:

ORIGINAL: PrincessEllie

The way I translate it is this...
D/s - Not 24/7 and the sub can change the contract and decide not to do things

M/s - 24/7 live in relationship and the slave cannot decide not to do things [ie, no safewords]



Interesting but I would disagree.

top/bottom: It's about sex and kink. You might have a steady play partner but you live your life and our partner lives theirs. The only control the top has over the bottom is during play. Someone who is solely a sadist or masochist would most likely fall under this category.

Ds, dominance and submission: 24/7 it's part of our personality, its who you are. You may have a contract and agreed upon limits, you might not. Since any control based relationship is based on a dominant partner controlling a submissive partner, Ms, TPE, APE, Op are just variations upon a Ds relationship dynamic. Everyone has limits. Some are legal, others ethical and some just personal. But everyone has limits. How you pull the plug on the relationship varies, but in the end everyone has limits. The slave can always decide to leave, so in the end the slave "can decide not to do something".


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The person who says it can not be done, should not interrupt the person doing it. - Ancient Wisdom

(in reply to PrincessEllie)
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RE: Difference between M/S and D/s - 4/24/2007 11:32:07 AM   
OfHonestValue


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Joined: 4/19/2007
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interesting point and a good one to.

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Submission is a gift that can not be demanded.

(in reply to MistressMelissa)
Profile   Post #: 30
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