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RE: Humilation - 3/2/2007 10:58:40 AM

moki1984

Posts: 274
Joined: 2/22/2007
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Their was a post awhile back regarding someone taking pictures off of the collarme site and using them elsewhere. Do you not think posting pictures of her whether her face is in them or not is dangerous? Anyone could run across this and many bad situations could arise from it. Maybe it is something she would let you do and we are all jumping down your throat for something she consents to, but you should definitely talk this over with her and weight the pros/cons of it. Their are many humuliation tactics that could play upon her body insecurities and eventually push her to a lvl where she feels more confident about her body....im not so sure if this would have any affect other than hurt your trust which is very important in a D/s relationship. just my thoughts , take them with a grain of rice

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RE: Humilation - 3/3/2007 7:51:53 AM

OsideGirl

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quote:

ORIGINAL: moki1984

Do you not think posting pictures of her whether her face is in them or not is dangerous? Anyone could run across this and many bad situations could arise from it.

My main issue with this is that I believe the first rule of D/s BDSM is "Do no harm" and there are so many places for harm in this scenario.

The OP said that she does not like anything showing her posted. By doing so, it may not do her harm in the physical realm, but I'd be willing to bet that it would do psychological harm. At the very least, it would change the trust level in her Dominant.

Next, I believe as Michael does, humiliation for punishment is not a good thing. Humiliation as a punishment equals psychological abuse.

Lastly, a story about a Dom I dated several years ago. Someone printed out his AOL profile and mailed it to his employer. He was fired. (This was in LA, the bastian of kinkiness, mind you.) It took him more than a year to get a new job because of that issue. So, if someone in your life says that they don't want their pictures on the internet, respect that wish. Their fears may be well founded.

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RE: Humilation - 3/3/2007 8:02:50 AM

Amaros

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I would not post pics of a sub in an open forum against her wishes - as mentioned by several here, there are potential ramifications that go beyond the objective of humiliation - better, I think, if you are intent on this, to control the audience, i.e., emails to select discrete individuals, perhaps in conjuction with commentary in chat - could get a whole circle going I imagine, with reciporication.

The thing about open board is, you never know if there are haters floating around just looking to make trouble.

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RE: Humilation - 3/18/2007 11:40:21 AM

NYkinksters

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I would type more but others can continue this better than I

No No feel free to type more!!! Grin

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RE: Humilation - 3/18/2007 11:49:07 AM

tempest1961

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Joined: 3/11/2007
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Unless she has already consented to this, it is Waaaaaaay Wrong and a "Bad Idea". The other side of the coin is what would you think if she posted pictures of you someplace, mr. "I don't even have a picture of myself posted."

Humiliating pack members in public is usually a bad idea.

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RE: Humilation - 3/18/2007 3:33:11 PM

Rafters

Posts: 266
Joined: 3/9/2006
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Photography is a kink just like any other, it can be fun, and it can be abused.

Photoshop can turn anyone in Dita von Teese. Skin like porcelain, waist like an hourglass and tits like zeppelins, suspended from the ceiling by a shimmering fairy threads. Or down the other path, three different photos and some cut and pasting will provide a ménage trois visual to the phrase "go fucking flog yourself".

And just like any kink, communication is key, not just from the sub, "I want to be like this photo", "like this sketch", "surprise me", "just not my face/tattoo/identifiable feature"
But also to the sub, things like what encryption it'll be saved under? who has access to the computer? Will she hoard it? Be passing it around her circle (which'll leak)? Or be slapping it against her nick as advertising?
What the facts of life are, regarding computer security!
How the facts of life regarding human security summarise down to Mark Twain’s quote “the only way three people can keep a secret is if two of them are dead"
Photos will ooze around restrictions, you just have to show them to a close friend, your PC will be sent somewhere for repairs, your flattie will feel bored and curious, your SO-de-jour will feel pouty because you lock them out of the big secret in that file.

Photos are really Cool, because they will act as a souvenir of a trip you took off the beaten path the mainstream takes.

Photos are really UnCool, because they will provide proof you go off the beaten path the mainstream takes.

At the end of the day photography is up there with any kink that leaves a mark. You have to decide whether the risk is worth the pleasure, just like Granny did, all those years ago.

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RE: Humilation - 3/18/2007 4:34:05 PM

SilverShadows

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Master Fire I think you hit the head of the nail for me. I think humiliation play is like playing with fire. But heck I love playing with fire and do lots of edge play in other areas so that isn't a negative in my book. But humiliation as punishment is just humiliation. It is intended to make a person feel small, not to build them up in any way. This is probably one sub who has gotten in over her head and will become one of the damaged people who want to find that sub/dom relationship but can never trust a dom again.

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Post #: 27

RE: Humilation - 3/18/2007 5:10:23 PM

LadyPact

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Instead of bashing the OP for what I see as a negative abuse of power and trust, I would rather compliment Michael on his understanding of the subject. Cheers.

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Post #: 28