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SimplyMichael -> RE: Humilation (3/2/2007 8:10:47 AM)
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Humiliation is perhaps the most distorted and fucked up thing that is played with commonly in BDSM.
Humiliating someone to keep them small, to permanently undermine their self esteem is wrong. In this case I think I am on common ground with most in saying there is one true way...
Don't get me wrong, I LOVE humiliation and it is very fucking hot for me. It took me years to learn how to do it so that it stayed hot, didn't undermine my girls self confidence, and when we were done she felt better than she did going in. There are two important tricks that many of us use. One is to learn where the triggers are, both good and bad. The second is to remember to bring them back from being a cheap whore to your cherished partner physically, mentally, and emotionally.
I think of humiliation as sort of an emotional basement with a big door off the living room. Often times it is quite hot to just mention the door is there, not quite as a threat but as one of those things you whisper in someone's ear. "Next time we go to PE, I am going to tie you up and let the towel boys cum all over you" as she nears climax can really make some women explode. How exactly you play that as always is pretty unique.
If you decide to go into that basement and do something real, even if it is just to have her talk about being your cumslut and sucking your cum up off the floor or whatever triggers you are playing with, have some idea of how you are going to bring her back.
I would type more but others can continue this better than I
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