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Question for A/all - 9/14/2006 11:53:18 PM   
illuminati1


Posts: 44
Joined: 9/13/2006
Status: offline 		          'Ello E/everyone. i have a question to ask for A/anyone that wished to answer. i am currently owned by my Master though it is online which means i get no R/T training or playtime. So the porblem that i am faceing is not getting atttention from Him. He seems to give it all to His other slave.   Now, i am not a jealous person at all. It's just bugging the living hell out of me that i am getting NO attention from Him. Now, i am a person that NEEDS attention... does A/anyone have any suggestions what i should do?
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: Question for A/all - 9/15/2006 12:50:13 AM   
Hercuckslave


Posts: 103
Joined: 5/21/2006
Status: offline 		W/well A/as F/for M/me, I/i D/don't T/think O/one C/can E/expect M/much A/attention I/in A/an O/online R/relationship.

ok, i'm done playing around with the online capital stuff.  off topic opinion...it has nothing to do with D/s and makes it hard to read.

but seriously...it is an online, long distance, not in person relationship.  what sort of "attention" do you expect.  if it were me, if i saw there was no possibility of it moving towards a real time interaction, i would move on and seek one that has that potential.

M's m

(in reply to illuminati1)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: Question for A/all - 9/15/2006 1:38:27 AM   
mstrjx


Posts: 2045
Joined: 11/27/2005
Status: offline 		The wording of your post says that you are 'owned' by your Master.  If this were truly the case, then he can do with you whatever he wishes, or not, and that it isn't your place to complain about this.

But somehow I think that this ownership process happened over the course of perhaps two or three rounds of emails back and forth?  This is not ownership.

You're not showing enough of the picture, but clearly you aren't happy.  The least you could do was to find someone who will 'own' you by sending emails every day.  How hard would that be for a hardworking 'owner'?

Jeff

_____________________________

Know thyself. It's the best gift you can ever give yourself.

(in reply to illuminati1)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: Question for A/all - 9/15/2006 2:06:04 AM   
Rumtiger


Posts: 2634
Joined: 3/4/2006
From: Vegas
Status: offline 		i'm suddenly reminded of a line from a rather famous movie:

"Dont be jealous Napoleon but i've been chatting online with babes all day"

How someone can actually own or dominate someone online only is just incomprehensible to me, he dosent even email you, and whatever, its still only online.

I mean....damn people.



< Message edited by Rumtiger -- 9/15/2006 2:09:41 AM >

_____________________________

Fuck the Pandas!
-Moi

Mmm, I love me some kickboxers, you know why? Cause ya'll cant take a punch!
- Quentin Tarantino.

If they cant take a joke, fuck em.
-Tucker Max

(in reply to mstrjx)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: Question for A/all - 9/15/2006 3:20:24 AM   
Areflectionofyou


Posts: 258
Joined: 4/4/2006
Status: offline 		If you want R/t either move or find someone offline who lives close by....stop whining and change things...believe me we all have complained about situations in life. But you are the only one that can change yours.
jennifer

(in reply to illuminati1)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: Question for A/all - 9/15/2006 3:45:04 AM   
twicehappy


Posts: 2706
Joined: 2/5/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Rumtiger


How someone can actually own or dominate someone online only is just incomprehensible to me, he dosent even email you, and whatever, its still only online.


Excuse me while i get my flame retardant suit from the closet and put in on....... (Jumps behind firewall).
 
Now...I agree with Rumtiger here, i know there are many who firmly believe in online collars but i just do not get it. No flesh, no blood, no heat, no passion, to me anyway.
 
That being said and addressing the OP's problem (i am about to be blunt and harsh here so those who are easily offended please stop reading here); 
 
GET YOUR HEAD OUT OF THE SAND!
 
If all you want is an online Dom you can find 30 or more a day on any bdsm oriented web site. My best advice is to try looking for a real experience though, find somebody who wants a RT RL relationship, somebody you will get to meet. Join a local munch or support group, meet live people.
 
You are jealous of a face on a computer screen here, think about it for a minute. Jealousy is a useless emotion to begin with and one many (not all) real life Doms do not put up with. Take some time to examine what it is you are really seeking.
 
If you are only seeking some online fun then go find yourself another online romance but if you are seeking a lifestyle partner follow my other suggestions.
 
It appears to me this guy had his fun with you and has moved on to another for his entertainment, give back the Velcro collar and move on yourself.  
 
 

_____________________________

Infinite Diversity in Infinite Combinations.

The human heart is not a finite container but an ever expanding universe with all the stars contained there in.

(in reply to Rumtiger)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: Question for A/all - 9/15/2006 4:10:02 AM   
swtnsparkling


Posts: 1738
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline 		Did you ask him breforehand how much time he has or is willing to give to you and the relationship?

If you did ask and he answered  but is not living up to that answer- then move on an find some one else.

If you never asked the question, well then you have only yourself to blame for not enough time


< Message edited by swtnsparkling -- 9/15/2006 4:12:00 AM >

_____________________________

Never make anyone a priority who treats you as an option 2003

Walk in Peace
A "No" uttered from deepest conviction is better than a "Yes" uttered merely to please



(in reply to illuminati1)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: Question for A/all - 9/15/2006 4:38:54 AM   
midnyt


Posts: 40
Joined: 8/27/2006
Status: offline 		i was going to add my 5 cents how ever i dont really need to becouse twicehappy took all the words out of my mouth. if i could figure out how to use this damn quote thing i would....so im quoting twicehappy here...lol!
if you dont like how things are going communicate to your master other wise get off your online knees and do something about it. only you have the power to find what makes you happy.
best wishes to you
~midnyt~

(in reply to twicehappy)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: Question for A/all - 9/15/2006 4:53:55 AM   
LadyJulieAnn


Posts: 979
Joined: 6/29/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: illuminati1

         'Ello E/everyone. i have a question to ask for A/anyone that wished to answer. i am currently owned by my Master though it is online which means i get no R/T training or playtime. So the porblem that i am faceing is not getting atttention from Him. He seems to give it all to His other slave.   Now, i am not a jealous person at all. It's just bugging the living hell out of me that i am getting NO attention from Him. Now, i am a person that NEEDS attention... does A/anyone have any suggestions what i should do?


If you look at the statements you made, I think the answer will come to you.  I'm not going to bash online D/s because I had some very strong D/s relationships online in my early days, but it sounds like you simply need to find someone who can give you that time.  Unfortunately, online needs can tend to take over real life, so I would be cautious about that.

Be well,
Julie

(in reply to illuminati1)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: Question for A/all - 9/15/2006 5:06:09 AM   
MasterRobert1


Posts: 225
Joined: 7/18/2005
Status: offline 		Seems pretty obvious to me. Why not quit online and go real time. Best way to get real attention and affection. Not to mention other things.

(in reply to illuminati1)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: Question for A/all - 9/15/2006 5:22:20 AM   
Focus50


Posts: 3962
Joined: 12/28/2004
From: Newcastle, Australia
Status: offline 		You are getting attention - you're getting used! 
 
Assuming this other slave is his r/l partner (pleaseeeee don't let this be *two* online M/s relationships), he's using you to help spice up their D/s love life! 
 
I'm tempted to tell you to grow up and find something r/l as it seems something *you* want, but that'd be premature as you are indeed (predictably) young.  My honest opinion is to write him off to experience and not get suckered into online collars again.
 
Good luck....
 
PS.  Do it *after* you resolve your nilla b/f issue as it'll only get just as messy and unfulfilling....
 
Focus.

(in reply to illuminati1)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: Question for A/all - 9/15/2006 6:04:13 AM   
Sirandlittle1


Posts: 538
Joined: 12/22/2005
Status: offline 		Your needs are not being met. Move on.

(in reply to Focus50)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: Question for A/all - 9/15/2006 6:20:25 AM   
Littlepita


Posts: 1430
Joined: 10/6/2005
Status: offline 		It always amazes me that someone will let themselves be owned when the owner clearly doesn't have their property's best interest in mind.

I started out online. He didn't "Own" me until we moved in together. Online was a time to make sure we were what the other wanted. Not playing at D/s but discussing D/s in great detail over and over again. If I had been ignored during this time he wouldn't have become my Dom.

Move on and do better.

_____________________________

“I, with a deeper instinct, choose a man who compels my strength, who makes enormous demands on me, who does not doubt my courage or my toughness, who does not believe me naive or innocent, who has the courage to treat me like a woman.” – Anais Nin

(in reply to Sirandlittle1)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: Question for A/all - 9/15/2006 6:52:42 AM   
SweetSarijane


Posts: 3788
Joined: 10/7/2005
From: KC area Missouri
Status: offline 		Based on the information given I'd say move on. Online is better used for getting to know one another as people than a full blown D/s, M/s relationship. In many, if not most, cases online D/s tends to be a game and fantasy on one side or the other or both. Online can only go so far. Best to find groups in your area and get involved r/t and gain some experience or understanding of what it's about. Smart to not submit asap but rather watch, listen, learn and ask questions. Rushing into something because you need to submit is generally a recipe for disaster and pain. Read books like The Bottoming Book, SM 101 and others. Be informed before making commitments.

My 2 cents.

_____________________________

Sarah2
Deviant Mind
Wild Side Readers KCSass

(in reply to Littlepita)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: Question for A/all - 9/15/2006 7:13:41 AM   
crouchingtigress


Posts: 4387
Joined: 3/19/2006
From: Maui
Status: offline 		you seem afraid of admitting you are jealous...there is nothing wrong with feeling angry and jealous, these are human emotions...as soon as you allow yourself to feel what you are really feeling, you can do something about it....
 
at this point blaming him is pointless, he is showing quite clearly he is not willing or able to be what you need, so then the next step is to look to yourself for some guidence....become quiet and ask yourself what do you want to do about it...and remember this quote:
 
                                          
                                              "man can fail many times but only becomes a failure when he blames some one else".



_____________________________


Service slut, durable plaything, and ponypenquincatdogpig, to Lee Harrington

This is him

"Its none of my buisness what other people think of me."




(in reply to SweetSarijane)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: Question for A/all - 9/15/2006 7:17:52 AM   
LotusSong


Posts: 6334
Joined: 7/2/2006
From: Domme Emeritus
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Rumtiger


How someone can actually own or dominate someone on line only is just incomprehensible to me, he doesn't even email you, and whatever, its still only on line.

I mean....damn people.




Looooooooong ago in a faraway year.. I had an "on line master".  Oh he was slick.. everyone wanted him.. and the theater of the mind is a powerful place!  I can understand what she is feeling.  I did everything that was asked.. and really gave it my all.  Not thinking for ONE second.. that .. this could be some married guy in a trailer in Paduka!  But he wasn't.. or was he..  

After 9 months we parted ways.. on line.. (I really have to chuckle at myself now).  Talk about DRAMA!

Anyhoo, you can get a "sense" of domination/submission.  It was a good learning tool. But only a TOOL.  Take it all with a grain of , not salt, but REALITY.

Guys see it as a Diversion.  Gals see it as... a Possibility.

Unfortunately it's not a case of  "If you believe hard enough it becomes real".  There are no velveteen subbies.

My advice.. for all 2 cents worth... Keep moving.   Let him come after YOU.  But all in all, take it as an experience. You know a bit more.. you feel a bit more.

I leaned about my emotions.  I learned techniques.  I learned that the Best Dommes are born of a lousy Master. :)  Because, we will not do to a submissive what was done to us.

< Message edited by LotusSong -- 9/15/2006 7:42:35 AM >

_____________________________

Life Lesson #1

I'm not your type.
I'm not inflatable.


(in reply to Rumtiger)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: Question for A/all - 9/15/2006 7:26:42 AM   
Lashra


Posts: 4900
Joined: 2/9/2006
Status: offline 		Get offline and into the real world then you can meet someone who will own and use you.

~Lashra


_____________________________

“We can never judge the lives of others, because each person knows only their own pain and renunciation. It's one thing to feel that you are on the right path, but it's another to think that yours is the only path.”






(in reply to LotusSong)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: Question for A/all - 9/15/2006 7:27:25 AM   
crouchingtigress


Posts: 4387
Joined: 3/19/2006
From: Maui
Status: offline 		PS, dont buy into the idea that on-line is good or bad, real or not real...
 
as with anything it is what you decide it to be, and if it is where you feel the most comfortable exploring there, then dont feel peer-pressured to shift that for yourself. on line can be a great place to learn, explore and grow.
 
any one that does not feel that it is real, has not had the experience of it being real is all, dont read too much into all that.
 
many, myself included have had the experience of it being real, and beautiful, exciting, painful, arousing, intense and the whole compendium of human emotions.
 
i invite you to not make the mistake of not honoring what your own experience, because it leads to things like what you are experiencing with this dom, ie: him not honoring you.
 
see the correlation? when you honor yourself, your feelings of anger and jealousy, your experience of feeling owned on line then you will find others honor it too, and when you dont, they dont.
 
simple but not easy, i wish you well and bid you peace,
 
love
tigress

_____________________________


Service slut, durable plaything, and ponypenquincatdogpig, to Lee Harrington

This is him

"Its none of my buisness what other people think of me."




(in reply to crouchingtigress)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: Question for A/all - 9/15/2006 7:34:09 AM   
juliaoceania


Posts: 21383
Joined: 4/19/2006
From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: illuminati1

         'Ello E/everyone. i have a question to ask for A/anyone that wished to answer. i am currently owned by my Master though it is online which means i get no R/T training or playtime. So the porblem that i am faceing is not getting atttention from Him. He seems to give it all to His other slave.   Now, i am not a jealous person at all. It's just bugging the living hell out of me that i am getting NO attention from Him. Now, i am a person that NEEDS attention... does A/anyone have any suggestions what i should do?

I would release myself and join a real life community and meet a real dominant.  I would set my profile up on sites like CM and I would state I do not do online training. I would ask myself what I am being "trained" for, because if the answer is you just want to experience kinky BDSM sex, you can do that without a "trainer"

I would not consider this person my dom because he is not even doing the minimal amount he should because he has another slave and it is just an internet fun thing to him and it sounds like you take it much more seriously. If  it was a serious thing for him too this post would never have happened..

Just my opinion

_____________________________

Once you label me, you negate me ~ Soren Kierkegaard

Reality has a well known Liberal Bias ~ Stephen Colbert

Great minds discuss ideas; Average minds discuss events; Small minds discuss people. Eleanor Roosevelt

(in reply to illuminati1)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: Question for A/all - 9/15/2006 7:46:13 AM   
raiken


Posts: 868
Joined: 10/18/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: illuminati1

         'Ello E/everyone. i have a question to ask for A/anyone that wished to answer. i am currently owned by my Master though it is online which means i get no R/T training or playtime. So the porblem that i am faceing is not getting atttention from Him. He seems to give it all to His other slave.   Now, i am not a jealous person at all. It's just bugging the living hell out of me that i am getting NO attention from Him. Now, i am a person that NEEDS attention... does A/anyone have any suggestions what i should do?

 
Okay i am just going to ramble here...and share what i feel from reading this...
 
You may be becoming addicted, frustratingly addicted, this is often the beginnings of it.  You can't leave it alone, and yet even though frustrated, you can't resist the lil bit that you get.  You begin to crave it more, and settle for less... than what you truly want and need.
 
That is the beginnings of online addiction, hence your frustrations.  Maybe i am wrong, OR, maybe you will be in denial, but do be careful with this and at lest consider another perspective to aid you in your own.  i tried this once, and only once, so i understand. 
 
There is no connection when there is no contact.  Period.  It only exists in your mind.
 
Feeling desperate only enhances the frustrations.
 
There is really no one to be jealous about, because when the system is off, it is just you, yourself, and...YOU!  You, alone and in secret, inside of your minds fantasy and desires...
 
So instead of letting it bug the hell out of You, if it is online for now that you feel you wish to pursue, there are plenty of others who will be willing to sit at their computer for an hour a night to give You that.  Are you falling in love with this Master';s words?  How did he come to cyber own you anyway?  Are you cyber collared?  Do you even talk on the phone?
 
i understand the excitement and draw of online exchange and the lifestyle fantasies we build in our mind about who is on the other end of the binary...but...remember to keep a balance and put the situation into a proper perspective. Online, if not heading for a real time meet, may be better viewed as a past time hobby or interest...it helps keep a balance.
 
UNLESS, it will become physical, REAL, and you plan to meet, hopefully within a short time frame.  IF NOT, then it is just "play", just "fantasy", just "entertainment" that meets a desire or craving, just a "temp high" to relieve what ever ails ya...it can be nothing more...UNLESS you both wish to make it "physically" real.  Keeping this in a healthy perspective, will allow you to enjoy it for what it is, without it affecting you or frustrating you. 
 
If you really need attention, go out and find some, in what ever way you can, put yourself out there and make friends and meet others.  Good luck

(in reply to illuminati1)
Profile   Post #: 20
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