so im softcore huh? (Full Version)

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MrTieNtease -> so im softcore huh? (8/18/2006 1:52:18 PM)

I talked to a girl recently(she knows who she is) it seems im not hardcore which is something im not too worried about, at first she was happy to chat with me but i began to realise she wanted more than i was prepared to give.I explained im not into causing pain or extremes i only enjoy playing fantasy roles(pretend kidnapping scenes etc) & though i tried to be more viscious it seems its not in my nature. so to this girl i say "sorry even pretending to beat you does nothing for me & i hope you find what it is you are looking for"  




Tikkiee -> RE: so im softcore huh? (8/18/2006 1:56:47 PM)

I will admit to being a bit confused as to the reason for this post. All that aside though, the best advice is to always be yourself. Everyone seeks something different; trying to change that accomplishes nothing.




LuckyAlbatross -> RE: so im softcore huh? (8/18/2006 1:57:49 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Tikkiee
I will admit to being a bit confused as to the reason for this post. All that aside though, the best advice is to always be yourself. Everyone seeks something different; trying to change that accomplishes nothing.

Ditto




beenwhipped -> RE: so im softcore huh? (8/18/2006 2:16:28 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross

quote:

ORIGINAL: Tikkiee
I will admit to being a bit confused as to the reason for this post. All that aside though, the best advice is to always be yourself. Everyone seeks something different; trying to change that accomplishes nothing.

Ditto

no need to rephrase when said so well




Slipstreme -> RE: so im softcore huh? (8/18/2006 2:47:11 PM)

There are plenty of people out there who have no interest for pain or who's interest in pain is small at best. In fact, I think they might be the majority. Just keep looking.




NastyDaddy -> RE: so im softcore huh? (8/18/2006 2:53:05 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: MrTieNtease

I talked to a girl recently(she knows who she is)...



This is good, she knows who she IS....

You seem to know who you are NOT....

ummm... isn't that a perfect match?

So what's the prob, did she block you already? 

Is that why you're airing out your laundry here?






Vancouver_cinful -> RE: so im softcore huh? (8/18/2006 2:57:48 PM)

Some people are just into bondage, others are just into spanking...Some just like role-play, some just like D/s with no pain, and others like pain with no D/s... There's something, and someone, for everybody.

There's nothing soft-core or hard-core about it. Sounds like you aren't a sadist, and why try to be what you aren't?

Welcome to the forums.




gingersnap -> RE: so im softcore huh? (8/18/2006 3:25:21 PM)

The candy store is HUGE keep on looking.

Don't worry, Be happy.

gin




beenwhipped -> RE: so im softcore huh? (8/18/2006 3:35:54 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: Vancouver_cinful

and others like pain with no D/s...

Noooooooooo..... she ratted me out!!!! [:D]

enjoy what you enjoy, dont try something you dont want and dont FORCE you ideas on someone esle.




Vancouver_cinful -> RE: so im softcore huh? (8/18/2006 3:46:13 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: beenwhipped


quote:

ORIGINAL: Vancouver_cinful

and others like pain with no D/s...

Noooooooooo..... she ratted me out!!!! [:D]


Pure masochist huh? You people freak me out! [sm=hewah.gif]

(Nah, I'm actually just jealous cause I'm a wimp!)




beenwhipped -> RE: so im softcore huh? (8/18/2006 3:51:19 PM)

didnt say pure, have found a limit or two...




jamesthehumanrug -> RE: so im softcore huh? (8/18/2006 7:04:16 PM)

[:o]why rub it in......you sadist you




diamonddreamlove -> RE: so im softcore huh? (8/18/2006 11:36:10 PM)

I have a Friend who has told me that He has been considered to be too soft also.  But He isn't just is different that all the Others, which is about right since no cookie cutter used on any of us here.




SusanofO -> RE: so im softcore huh? (8/19/2006 1:57:33 AM)

I have read posts from other people here, on occasion, who are into just role playing and the gentle side of D/s also. In fact, I remember, there was a couple who had been together for years, that used to write into this site, that had pretty much what you describe as liking as almost exclusively what they seemed to do for bdsm activity.

I don't think it's strange. My gosh, how could anyone on this site profess to know what, exactly, constitutes weird, anyway? I mean this whole bdsm world is just so diverse - the entire world of human behavior is, too. I wouldn't be too concerned
about it. Good luck.

- Susan  




vield -> RE: so im softcore huh? (8/19/2006 2:11:17 AM)

LOL, this is such a matter of definition and consent, it really shows the importance of talking things through and negotiating that which everyone involved consents to and needs.

We all have the right to chose the degree of kink we get into with any given partner. In fact if you play with a number of poeple, your limits and needs could be very different with some of them than with others. The chemistry will be often different with different partners.

A person seeking soft sensual play as dom or sub is entitled to their limits, as is a person seeking heavy duty hard play as dom or as sub. 

What one dom or sub thinks is soft core and not very intense may be a LOT more than is acceptable for another dom or sub.

vield




ScooterTrash -> RE: so im softcore huh? (8/19/2006 4:27:07 AM)

Sounds like you were honest about what you desired/didn't desire...that's about all you can do.




mstrjx -> RE: so im softcore huh? (8/19/2006 6:17:55 AM)

I'm not quite sure how new you are to WIITWD, but we all start somewhere.  And, we all have ideas of what interest us in the beginning.  But as we become exposed to other people/ideas/partners, we find our horizons expanding.

Everybody knows that subs have limits that get negotiated, but it is not always considered that doms and tops 'might' have limits as well.  This person seems to have rubbed up against yours fairly quickly.  It seems, however, that you had just met this person, so it is true that your current views and her desires do not make you a good match.

But one day, you'll meet someone and develop a solid relationship.  And you will grow (or not) and she will grow (or not) in your fantasies and desires.  What happens if she grows outside of your interests?

My personal take on things has always been to be able to always stay one step ahead of my partner.  If she wants to be beaten to within an inch of her life, I need to be able to get within 1/2 an inch.  Why?  It's not because I necessarily enjoy dishing out heavy pain, or because I'm a natural sadist.

It's because I want to please my partner.  I want to stay with my partner.  I want my partner to stay with me.  I don't want my partner to be bored with me because I can't fulfill her needs.  So I learn to fulfill her needs.

So, 15 years later, I can do just about anything.  Play at just about any level.  I let my limits be dictated by whomever those of whomever my partner is, and safety.  My horizons have broadened.

Will yours?

Jeff




popeye1250 -> RE: so im softcore huh? (8/19/2006 11:06:18 AM)

It's no big whoop, different people like different things is all.




MrTieNtease -> RE: so im softcore huh? (8/19/2006 12:03:49 PM)

wow thanks for the replies suddenly i dont feel like im such a freak after all. i was baginnig to think i was in the wrong place...maybe im not again thank you all 




beenwhipped -> RE: so im softcore huh? (8/19/2006 12:05:10 PM)

as long as you have an open mind, you are in the right place.




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