LadyHugs
Posts: 2299
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline
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Dear FelinePersuasion, Owned1, Ladies and Gentlemen;
I recently had a chap from North Carolina identifying himself as a 40 something dominant male. Profile was made one day prior. Now, this chap writes me, says if interested in talking I have his permission to approach. Well-- I am a polite person, so I advised him that if he read the profile, I am very much a dominant lady, to which giving me permission to approach was as if I was his slave. So, I kindly told the chap that I didn't switch and to take me off his solicitation list. So, his response was ok fatty.
Unfortunately, CM doesn't have a box to click off for just being an idiot and rude. Certainly, this chap was looking for fantasy sex and probably never met a strong dominant woman.
No matter if on the Internet, in social groups like munches and gatherings, fakes are all around behind the screen and rubbing elbows with you at some munch. Everybody has their own individual 'spirit of intent,' to which we must be responsible for our own choices. Certainly, we have a duty to seek out any information about the individual and we also have a duty, to validate information. Unfortunately, some people get their jollies off ruining a reputation of another, without evidence, without meeting a person, without looking at creditials. I'm sure people certainly remember the dressing down I continue to receive from a male to which, in normal circumstances wouldn't be tolerated. I was even called a fake.
I know I am not a fake, those who have met me in person, know I am not a fake and I do have many talents, skills, knowledge and information to share.
However, being face to face does not mean that you'll be absent of dealing with fakes. I've seen so many individuals dedicate their energy to 'selling' how real they were but, when it came to that time to prove it--they failed miserably. And, it must be taken into account that those just beginning often are unjustly measured by the 'yard stick' of those with many years under there belt, and label the beginners as "fake" or "wanna-bes." It is risky to besmirch individuals, as they may turn the tables and call their accusers into account and challenge their authenticity as well.
In addition, people have used black lists or black ball individuals to whom do not fit into the clique or have enough power as not to need a group to exist in a D/s dynamic. I do know what it feels like to be excluded from such groups. Not so much for ill behavior but, due to intimidated individuals that shut more seasoned dominants out, as to remain the 'star' of the show.
In dealing with human nature, I am of the belief that we all must follow our gut instincts and rely on our own experiences to govern our choices, as well as judging another.
Respectfully submitted for consideration,
Lady Hugs
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RE: How to expose fakes? thoughts - 
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