quote:

ORIGINAL: TxBlkMistress

Hmmm...I don't understand it, but I'm not going to throw stones at it either.  I could not and do not use service only slaves...but I get a lot of offers for this and tons for cuckolds, so you can't just say it's a Dommes/Doms request.  A lot more people, more than I could ever imagine prefer this....to each his own.

quote:

ORIGINAL: littlesarbonn

I am a service-oriented submissive/slave. I've talked many times of something similar to this, but NOT exactly this. I've come to a personal belief that there's this fantasy that a lot of dominant women have that they can have a "service" oriented slave that wants absolutely nothing else. I believe it's a fantasy that's made pseudo reality because enough men have convinced women that this is what they want, just in hopes of getting in close enough to get whatever else they're really seeking.

The original question put forth the relationship of a dominant woman wanting a male slave to come in, clean and then leave. No other interaction of either a sexual or even psychological nature. I've talked at length about this and how elusive this type of relationship is because it's a fantasy that lasts only as long as the guy is willing to pretend to be only into the relationship because of a service motivation but with NO other interaction. Sure, it can happen. And crazy people can run through the streets naked, too, but that doesn't mean it's going to be anywhere near easy to find.

quote:

ORIGINAL: TeeGO

...all thoughts of my own pleasure are buried under thoughts of pleasing her.  BUT, this submission can only come about from me when I have learned to trust the Domme KNOWING she cares for me and takes her responsibilty for me as seriously as I do for her... 

quote:

ORIGINAL: littlesarbonn

I am a service-oriented submissive/slave. I've talked many times of something similar to this, but NOT exactly this. I've come to a personal belief that there's this fantasy that a lot of dominant women have that they can have a "service" oriented slave that wants absolutely nothing else. I believe it's a fantasy that's made pseudo reality because enough men have convinced women that this is what they want, just in hopes of getting in close enough to get whatever else they're really seeking.

The original question put forth the relationship of a dominant woman wanting a male slave to come in, clean and then leave. No other interaction of either a sexual or even psychological nature. I've talked at length about this and how elusive this type of relationship is because it's a fantasy that lasts only as long as the guy is willing to pretend to be only into the relationship because of a service motivation but with NO other interaction. Sure, it can happen. And crazy people can run through the streets naked, too, but that doesn't mean it's going to be anywhere near easy to find.

As I mentioned at the beginning of this post, I am a service oriented slave. But I do it because I seek something OTHER than direct sexual satisfaction. I seek the control and ownership of a dominant/submissive relationship where I put in my every effort to make her satisfaction the sole purpose of what I do. This means I will work hard, put up with a whole ton of crap, just for the sake of making her happy. But this is where the understanding fails.

I can't count the number of times I was approached by a woman seeking me to be her house cleaner/slave, but she was involved with some other guy for the "real" bdsm stuff, so I would only be around for the cleaning process. When I said I wasn't interested, I was always accused of being some "fake" submissive, a lot like women who won't go out with guys that ask them out must somehow be lesbians.

Anyway, I've seen a LOT of this type of request in the past, and almost always it ends badly. It's a great fantasy, but for the most part, it exists within the phantom world that often goes "well, it must exist because I know of this one couple on the east coast that...." or "I'm living that lifestyle, so it's obviously very standard....", which usually is followed by a post two months later of "I don't know why he left. Everything was going so well."

quote:

ORIGINAL: subfever

quote:

ORIGINAL: TeeGO

...all thoughts of my own pleasure are buried under thoughts of pleasing her. BUT, this submission can only come about from me when I have learned to trust the Domme KNOWING she cares for me and takes her responsibility for me as seriously as I do for her...

I couldn't agree more with this excerpt.

It's a masterpiece... (no pun intended)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Archer

Well I certainly wouldn't say house management is an easy job, it was a combination of the lawyer and the mantra that made me choose the response.

Also I certainly wouldn't mean that altruism is the only reason one might choose a service life or that the rewards were limited to "thank you job well done, now go away".

There are rewards for service that come from within however being taken for granted would certainly in time overcome any and all of those rewards. But I didn't specify that no other rewards were forthcomming only that sex wasn't one of them, Directed growth, general appreciation, the opportunity to serve, the opportunity to advance in the service of the person, the chance to learn new skills. All of those things CAN lend themselves to a service oriented person being very happy in a non sexual D/s relationship. Of course if it isn't in you to serve in a non sexual possition if you have to have some form of sexual contact to make it work for you then I'm  not judgeing you many others are in the same boat for sure. I only say that some people can be happy that way.

Also I'll be the first to admit that there are more Dominants willing to take into service that kind of person than there are those kinds of people to be taken into service. And thus there are some who take the service for granted and thus may ruin the person's motivation to serve for a long time.

In Leather

Archer

quote:

ORIGINAL: Wickad

Non-sexual D/s dynamics do not equate straight across to 'service only'.  There is always a give and take in any relationship. 

Owning a person is not an easy task.  I've heard many people joke about wanting a service slave because they need their laundry done or want their house cleaned.  Though these might be some of the benifits to having a service orientated slave (of course the exact benifits need to be discussed during negotition) there are also all of the responsibilities that go with owning a whole person.  That person will always (no matter what they claim) have needs.  They will want to feel needed, cherished, loved, valued, etc.  They will also have all of their physical needs - shelter, food, clothing, etc.  There will be sexual needs that need to be addressed.  As well, I would suggest that down time is also an essential need and thus must be scheduled in. 

Even if the dynamic is not a 24/7 relationship, having a service slave is not simply scheduling a time for them to come and detail your car.  In my opinion it is about balancing their mundane life with the life they lead as your slave.  If your slave is a student, as an example, then it is your responsibility to make sure that his grades are high, that he meets and associates with like minded folks, that he does not neglect his civic duties, that is SM needs are seen to, that he maintains a healthy sexual life, that he does not neglect himself, that he does have the opportunity to serve you himself (this can range from him spending time cleaning your home to serving a dinner party to giving you an afternoon spa treatment).  Like any D/s relationship there are many more facets to it than merely play and sex.

Contrary to some folks opinion on this thread, owning a service slave is not about being lazy.  In my opinion this dynamic is about ownership and devotion.  Sex is a part of the human experience.  Sex, however, does not equate to intimacy for all people.

Wickad

quote:

ORIGINAL: subfever

Service only? No way! Libido and ego are what drives my desires to submit...