RE: I've decided I'm going to whore myself... (Full Version)

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TNDommeK -> RE: I've decided I'm going to whore myself... (3/2/2013 6:09:07 AM)

What I wanna know is, if I hire you...will you stir my drink with your penis? That's what gets you paid !




BlkTallFullfig -> RE: I've decided I'm going to whore myself... (3/3/2013 12:10:36 AM)

Look, I dont know how good you are, but if you're going to charge that much, you better add some nookie to the deal. :). M




ShaharThorne -> RE: I've decided I'm going to whore myself... (3/3/2013 4:56:16 AM)

Lookie, you are underselling yourself...

Besides, I only got 300 in the sterling account...guess I am out of the picture.




LookieNoNookie -> RE: I've decided I'm going to whore myself... (3/3/2013 5:15:17 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: ShaharThorne

Lookie, you are underselling yourself...

Besides, I only got 300 in the sterling account...guess I am out of the picture.



She's right.

$2,000,000.00.




MrRodgers -> RE: I've decided I'm going to whore myself... (3/3/2013 5:49:19 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: TNDommeK

What I wanna know is, if I hire you...will you stir my drink with your penis? That's what gets you paid !

No iced drinks or hot coffee, ok ? Otherwise...you got it. Also, only after the f_act. You realize, I have a reputation to protect...I think.




Duskypearls -> RE: I've decided I'm going to whore myself... (3/3/2013 7:52:31 AM)

Sweetie pie, you are the Head Whore of Humor in my book, which is of incalculable value. I see you as priceless, as humor is one of my greatest turn-on's. You do make me laugh.




theRose4U -> RE: I've decided I'm going to whore myself... (3/3/2013 9:25:09 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: Duskypearls

Sweetie pie, you are the Head Whore of Humor in my book, which is of incalculable value. I see you as priceless, as humor is one of my greatest turn-on's. You do make me laugh.

Where is alpha when you need her? Think you found his tagline!! He's much more the head whore of humor than deranged!!




DomMeinCT -> RE: I've decided I'm going to whore myself... (3/3/2013 10:04:05 AM)

For $1,000,000.00, do you guarantee satisfaction?

What about position(s)....does she get to pick?




LookieNoNookie -> RE: I've decided I'm going to whore myself... (3/3/2013 10:18:21 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: MrRodgers


quote:

ORIGINAL: TNDommeK

What I wanna know is, if I hire you...will you stir my drink with your penis? That's what gets you paid !

No iced drinks or hot coffee, ok ? Otherwise...you got it. Also, only after the f_act. You realize, I have a reputation to protect...I think.


(As you may know...being a Mr.....stirring cold drinks with my rather large {device} does in fact create issues......shrinkage).

(Not that there's anything wrong with that).




LookieNoNookie -> RE: I've decided I'm going to whore myself... (3/3/2013 10:20:48 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: Duskypearls

Sweetie pie, you are the Head Whore of Humor in my book, which is of incalculable value. I see you as priceless, as humor is one of my greatest turn-on's. You do make me laugh.


It's a gift....I've taken drugs to quell this but...I cayn't he'p m'sef.




LookieNoNookie -> RE: I've decided I'm going to whore myself... (3/3/2013 10:27:01 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: DomMeinCT

For $1,000,000.00, do you guarantee satisfaction?

What about position(s)....does she get to pick?


The price is now $2,000,000.00. For a million I guarantee I'll show up (well...actually, for a million, I'll send a Hallmark card and get both of us on channel 7). For 2 million....guarantee's.

I've been informed that my price was too low.

(I am willing to negotiate....I'm flexible. Actually, that's the wrong term....at 54, that's actually no longer true...."pliable"....much better term).

Okay...maybe pliable isn't the right term....maybe more like desperate....

Okay...pliable, and flexible (that's a lie) and desperate....yeah...that's more like it.

Pliable and desperate.

Yeah, that's it.

Wait....maybe desperate is more honest.

Yeah...that's it.




Muttling -> RE: I've decided I'm going to whore myself... (3/4/2013 3:11:25 AM)

I've decided that I will be more practical in the pricing of my manwhore self and go with fair market value. They say that a good man is worth his weight in gold so I will start the bid to buy at 3.3 million and nightly rentals at 1/10th the purchase price.




Lucylastic -> RE: I've decided I'm going to whore myself... (3/4/2013 6:32:30 AM)

I think nightly rentals is the thing to do Muttling, hey Lookie, have ya thought of that???? then you have time to get ....pliable after a rough night:)
thats doable:)




Notsweet -> RE: I've decided I'm going to whore myself... (3/4/2013 7:36:46 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: LookieNoNookie


quote:

ORIGINAL: Duskypearls

Sweetie pie, you are the Head Whore of Humor in my book, which is of incalculable value. I see you as priceless, as humor is one of my greatest turn-on's. You do make me laugh.


It's a gift....I've taken drugs to quell this but...I cayn't he'p m'sef.


Now see, it just goes to show that you can't make a rush to judgment on the boards. I would have bet that you took the drugs to get where you are.




Notsweet -> RE: I've decided I'm going to whore myself... (3/4/2013 7:40:52 AM)

The bidding war is clearly on, but I'm wondering....is Lookie desperate for money, or to please? Wait, am I really asking that?

So now it's all about quality. If you could only afford to buy one, would you rent both, or just buy one you could keep? Decisions, decisions.

It would be helpful if the subjects in question explained why I should choose one or the other.




Duskypearls -> RE: I've decided I'm going to whore myself... (3/4/2013 11:26:56 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: theRose4U


quote:

ORIGINAL: Duskypearls

Sweetie pie, you are the Head Whore of Humor in my book, which is of incalculable value. I see you as priceless, as humor is one of my greatest turn-on's. You do make me laugh.

Where is alpha when you need her? Think you found his tagline!! He's much more the head whore of humor than deranged!!


So, I'm not the only one who thinks this! He cracks me up, regularly.




Muttling -> RE: I've decided I'm going to whore myself... (3/5/2013 4:11:28 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Duskypearls

He cracks me up, regularly.




Sweet!!!!! I love seeing a female who is crack up.




LookieNoNookie -> RE: I've decided I'm going to whore myself... (3/5/2013 5:06:34 PM)

Okay....no more price listed....I'm simply going to make a business card with my name ("LookieNoNookie, Esq."), contact info and a simple statement on the bottom of the card.

"If you have to ask, you can't afford me".

Yep....great marketing ideas here....excellent!




LookieNoNookie -> RE: I've decided I'm going to whore myself... (3/7/2013 3:42:05 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Notsweet

The bidding war is clearly on, but I'm wondering....is Lookie desperate for money, or to please? Wait, am I really asking that?

So now it's all about quality. If you could only afford to buy one, would you rent both, or just buy one you could keep? Decisions, decisions.

It would be helpful if the subjects in question explained why I should choose one or the other.


Don't need no money...the Pinto station wagon is paid for. (And frankly...it's a hot motherfucking ride).

Although, I will say, cash is, and has always been, my favorite color. It goes with everything you know.

Now, let's be clear on what LookieNoNookie is in fact looking for:

A woman who can take care of me in the style I've become accustomed to.

Let's not hate....let's move on to more refined things....let's love and be loved.

Take care of me, love me, bring me treasures.....that's not that much to ask is it?

(I think not).




Notsweet -> RE: I've decided I'm going to whore myself... (3/7/2013 3:53:21 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: LookieNoNookie

Don't need no money...the Pinto station wagon is paid for. (And frankly...it's a hot motherfucking ride).

Although, I will say, cash is, and has always been, my favorite color. It goes with everything you know.

Now, let's be clear on what LookieNoNookie is in fact looking for:

A woman who can take care of me in the style I've become accustomed to.

Let's not hate....let's move on to more refined things....let's love and be loved.

Take care of me, love me, bring me treasures.....that's not that much to ask is it?

(I think not).


Bring you treasures.
I got your treasures right here, babe.




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