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I swear I'm not just here for the hot monkey sex - 2/10/2012 10:06:30 PM   
MrMasterMyster


Posts: 16
Joined: 2/5/2012
Status: offline 		I'm not going to say stuff like, "I long walks on the beach." Do you know
anyone who doesn't like the beach? (I especially like sand in my crack.)

I'm not going to tell you, "I like having fun." Who doesn't? (We all know scanning this forum for dirt and crappy stories equals good times.)

I'm not going to say, "I'll pleasure you with loving touch, we'll become one
with the rhythm of the universe." (because I know you want to be spanked.)

I'm not going to tell you I'm looking for a "partner, lover and best
friend," or my favorite, "partner in crime." Would I be posting here is I
wasn't? (I guess if I was bored I might post here.)

I'm definitely not going to mention sex. You should know by now I extremely
into that for the sole reason that I am a man. (Yep, the operation was a
success! JK)

I'm not going to talk about my "dreams, aspirations, and hopes of the
future." That is a conversation that may take hours. (I'm banking everything
on a lotto jackpot.)

I'm not going to candy coat things in order to get you to respond. That's not my point.

I just want someone to talk to (who is hot and sexy as hell).

I just want to be friends (so we can get drunk and have hot monkey sex).

I want to know how you feel (with your naked flesh against mine when we are having hot monkey sex).

I want to get to know you (dogie style).

I want to cherish our time together (You don't have to go home when I finish).

I want to learn about the real you (like what it sounds like when you call me daddy with my cock in your mouth).

I want to meet your friends (so you can watch me fuck them.)

I want to respect your boundaries (the safe word is "monkey sex." That's actually two words in case you are an idiot).

Now suck it!

< Message edited by MrMasterMyster -- 2/10/2012 10:58:31 PM >
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: I swear I'm not just here for the hot monkey sex - 2/10/2012 10:13:18 PM   
LadyHibiscus


Posts: 27124
Joined: 8/15/2005
From: Island Of Misfit Toys
Status: offline 		I have seen monkeys having sex, thanks to the fine efforts of David Attenborough. I am unimpressed. Have you considered leopard sex? Or...capybara sex?

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(in reply to MrMasterMyster)
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RE: I swear I'm not just here for the hot monkey sex - 2/10/2012 10:16:18 PM   
MrMasterMyster


Posts: 16
Joined: 2/5/2012
Status: offline 		Capybara sounds good but monkey sex just plain sounds funnier. Armadillo sex on the other hand is hot and nasty.

(in reply to LadyHibiscus)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: I swear I'm not just here for the hot monkey sex - 2/10/2012 10:17:00 PM   
LadyHibiscus


Posts: 27124
Joined: 8/15/2005
From: Island Of Misfit Toys
Status: offline 		PANGOLIN sex. Yep.

_____________________________

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RE: I swear I'm not just here for the hot monkey sex - 2/10/2012 10:22:59 PM   
JanahX


Posts: 3443
Joined: 8/21/2010
Status: offline 		Here is a monkey loving a frog. He is full of love.

http://youtu.be/PI4xVeRjunk

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The first rule of Fight Club is you do not talk about Fight Club.

The second rule of Fight Club is you do not talk about Fight Club.


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RE: I swear I'm not just here for the hot monkey sex - 2/11/2012 12:20:28 AM   
peppermint


Posts: 5175
Joined: 10/18/2005
From: Montana
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHibiscus

I have seen monkeys having sex, thanks to the fine efforts of David Attenborough. I am unimpressed. Have you considered leopard sex? Or...capybara sex?


I have always wondered about porcupines. 

_____________________________

We are stardust, we are golden, and we got to get ourselves back to the garden.

Yes, I am crazy about feathered creatures. I have a dozen chickens, 3 ducks, 5 geese, and 2 parakeets.

Revise that number. Just got 14 new chicks and 5 turkeys.

(in reply to LadyHibiscus)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: I swear I'm not just here for the hot monkey sex - 2/11/2012 2:22:16 AM   
Focus50


Posts: 3962
Joined: 12/28/2004
From: Newcastle, Australia
Status: offline 		Definition of a HNG was that they don't post.

Was...!

OP, does this mean you might also agree to actually meet a living, breathing girl from here, too?

Strange, strange times....

Focus.

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Never underestimate the persuasive power of stupid people in large groups. <unknown>

Your food is for eating, not torturing. <my mum> (Errm, when I was a kid)

(in reply to peppermint)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: I swear I'm not just here for the hot monkey sex - 2/11/2012 3:40:13 AM   
MissKittyDeVine


Posts: 1054
Joined: 9/24/2011
Status: offline 		I have seen two hedgehogs at it. I am still none the wiser.



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Sanity is overrated. Live la vida loca

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RE: I swear I'm not just here for the hot monkey sex - 2/11/2012 4:35:43 AM   
xssve


Posts: 3589
Joined: 10/10/2009
Status: offline 		http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KagyO9zS_ro

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Walking nightmare...

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RE: I swear I'm not just here for the hot monkey sex - 2/11/2012 4:41:33 AM   
JstAnotherSub


Posts: 6174
Status: offline 		.




Attachment (1)

< Message edited by JstAnotherSub -- 2/11/2012 4:42:02 AM >

_____________________________

yep

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RE: I swear I'm not just here for the hot monkey sex - 2/11/2012 4:46:52 AM   
Yachtie


Posts: 3593
Joined: 1/18/2012
Status: offline 		Dolphin sex. They do it for fun too.

_____________________________

“We all know it’s going to end badly, but in the meantime we can make some money.” - Jim Cramer, CNBC

“Those who ‘abjure’ violence can only do so because others are committing violence on their behalf.” - George Orwell

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Profile   Post #: 11
RE: I swear I'm not just here for the hot monkey sex - 2/11/2012 5:08:30 AM   
LadyHibiscus


Posts: 27124
Joined: 8/15/2005
From: Island Of Misfit Toys
Status: offline 		Dolphins rape for fun, too.

_____________________________

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Profile   Post #: 12
RE: I swear I'm not just here for the hot monkey sex - 2/11/2012 5:20:06 AM   
Yachtie


Posts: 3593
Joined: 1/18/2012
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHibiscus

Dolphins rape for fun, too.


^

Given their physiology I don't see how that's possible.

_____________________________

“We all know it’s going to end badly, but in the meantime we can make some money.” - Jim Cramer, CNBC

“Those who ‘abjure’ violence can only do so because others are committing violence on their behalf.” - George Orwell

(in reply to LadyHibiscus)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: I swear I'm not just here for the hot monkey sex - 2/11/2012 5:21:24 AM   
orimotis69


Posts: 69
Joined: 10/21/2011
Status: offline 		Hey! No one told me there was hot monkey sex here.

_____________________________

-Accepting another's path blinds you to alternatives.
-Every point of view is useful, even those that are wrong - if we can judge why a wrong view was accepted.
-You have not really defeated the enemy if you adopt their methods.

(in reply to LadyHibiscus)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: I swear I'm not just here for the hot monkey sex - 2/11/2012 5:36:34 AM   
poise


Posts: 9509
Joined: 7/3/2010
Status: offline 		My mother always told me.......
Never make eye contact while eating a banana.

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When the path ignites a soul, there’s no remaining in place.

(in reply to MrMasterMyster)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: I swear I'm not just here for the hot monkey sex - 2/11/2012 6:20:38 AM   
ResidentSadist


Posts: 12580
Joined: 2/11/2007
From: a mean old Daddy, but I like you - Joni Mitchell
Status: offline 		What a slut...  that frog will blow anyone!

quote:

ORIGINAL: JanahX
Here is a monkey loving a frog. He is full of love.

http://youtu.be/PI4xVeRjunk



_____________________________

-=BDSM Book List=- Reading is Fundamental !!!
I give good thread.

(in reply to JanahX)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: I swear I'm not just here for the hot monkey sex - 2/11/2012 6:36:27 AM   
LadyHibiscus


Posts: 27124
Joined: 8/15/2005
From: Island Of Misfit Toys
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Yachtie


quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHibiscus

Dolphins rape for fun, too.


^

Given their physiology I don't see how that's possible.



Several of the males gang up on a female and essentially hold her prisoner, to the point of not allowing her to the surface to breathe, while they entertain themselves.



_____________________________

[page 23 girl]



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Profile   Post #: 17
RE: I swear I'm not just here for the hot monkey sex - 2/11/2012 4:23:39 PM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline 		No monkeys but I made banana bread today.

On a more serious note, you do have to say if you want a relationship since so many people here just want a one night stand. Judging by the mail I've gotten.


_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!


(in reply to LadyHibiscus)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: I swear I'm not just here for the hot monkey sex - 2/11/2012 6:34:40 PM   
MasterG2kTR


Posts: 6677
Joined: 8/7/2004
From: Wisconsin
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHibiscus

I have seen monkeys having sex, thanks to the fine efforts of David Attenborough. I am unimpressed. Have you considered leopard sex? Or...capybara sex?


Wait a minute......are you saying Greedy was in a David Attenborough documentary??     

(in reply to LadyHibiscus)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: I swear I'm not just here for the hot monkey sex - 2/11/2012 6:43:55 PM   
LadyHibiscus


Posts: 27124
Joined: 8/15/2005
From: Island Of Misfit Toys
Status: offline 		+1 ^^

_____________________________

[page 23 girl]



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Profile   Post #: 20
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