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RE: Just a thought - 5/21/2006 2:47:22 PM

NakedOnMyChain

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My weight has never been regular. As a young child, I was very skinny. As an older child I was very heavy. As a teenager, I worked my ass off and was entirely too skinny. After high school I balanced out at a healthy weight. When I got married, I gained a bit, and became a bit chubby. (Size fourteen, as opposed to a size six in high school.)

I'm seven months pregnant, and watching myself balloon was depressing at first. Then it hit me: I don't give a shit. Like LaTigresse said, it doesn't matter what size jeans my ass fits in. I'd like to add this to it, though: It doesn't matter what size jeans my ass fits in, as long I feel and look good in them. Now, despite being a size sixteen (sometimes eighteen), I feel good about myself and comfortable where I'm at for the first time in my entire life. I feel beautiful and sexy, and it radiates from me. That shows true beauty (inner and outer) more than a tag size.

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RE: Just a thought - 5/21/2006 3:29:19 PM

MoonGoddessIsis

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From: Indiana
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Thank you again everyone for writing. I would have to agree wholehearted that it is how you feel. I model for Lane Bryant and at times they tell Me to quick losing weight! Gotta love that. I suppose it hit Me funny on a "judgement or idea" level then a personal one. I was not upset in the slightest in the comment, but more that he felt all plus size women are that way.

I too do not understand why it was moved. I thought general BDSM was where it should be. But okay!

Thanks again everyone
Lady Moon

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RE: Just a thought - 5/21/2006 3:46:19 PM

Emperor1956

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quote:

Having been on both sides of the spectrum now (though I certainly can alway stand to lose more weight), fat is one of the few prejudices left in our society which is not only tolerated, but abetted.

Puella has it just right (as does the O.P.) Had he said "You are very beautiful for a [Black] [Muslim] [Polish] etc. woman, and you don't usually find that" would there be any discussion that the guy was a jerk? I'm not saying everyone has to find everyone else attractive -- but that statement shows, at the least, insensitivity. The implication is that it is permissible to make negative comments to the "fat girl", while ostensibly complimenting her. Again, try that phrase substituting your ethnicity, race or religion, and tell Me its an appropriate statement?

That said, I am a large man. I have been very overweight most of my adult life. I've "swung" over the past 30 years from about 190 lbs to over 375 on my 5'9" frame. I'm down quite a bit from that unfortunate high, and trying to go further. Why? Not because I don't like Myself (I do -- Like most Dominants, I have way too healthy an ego.) But as I approach 50, the health effects are clearly negative, and undeniable. So I find Myself struggling with My weight because I want to be around a lot longer.

-E.

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RE: Just a thought - 5/21/2006 4:12:04 PM

forluvofmaria

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From: mountains of MD
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Beauty is in the eye of the beholder...I have Never been thin, thinner yes, but never thin. I am who I am and want to be nothing more than best at that. He probably thought, however misguided, that what he said was a compliment. Pity the uneducated as they are to be found everywhere...From your picture how he determined you were a BBW I do not know...But I think you have a very reflective picture...Bet you couldn't guess my weight...No one can till I lift about half my body weight, asking, "You wanted that where?" Muscle will always weigh more than true fat...An axiom I live by.

M.

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RE: Just a thought - 1/5/2007 8:55:22 PM

sunfalcon

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I've read this thread with much interest several times over the past couple of months. I'm a heavy man myself. Much of what you all have thought and described I've also felt from the other side of the table.

Much like Lady Moon, I take great pride in who I am and how I look. I'm not "proud" that I'm heavy, but I've accepted WHO I am all around as a person. Are there times when I get frustrated because I AM heavy? yes and no Are there times when I don't care? Yes and no

But, what bothers me more than anything else is much like prejudice against skin color or what religion you believe or don't believe in is intolerance ... plain and simple. Someone's intolerance to me whether it's because I'm a male sub or because I'm white or heavy, etc. only underlines their belitting attitude, selfishness and "mightier than thou" attitude that I just don't care for.

Anyway, been reading and thinking about this thread and thought I'd put in my two cents worth from a heavy man's perspective.

Hope all had a good and safe New Year. Play safe and be safe.

sun

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RE: Just a thought - 1/7/2007 1:27:59 PM

NaiveTempest

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Joined: 11/20/2006
From: North Carolina
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quote:

ORIGINAL: MoonGoddessIsis

"You are very beautiful for a plus size woman. You do not find that very often"

I simply leaned forward, sipping My coffee and thought.... "huh?"

Any idea why it hit Me so funny? Any thoughts? Cause I sure can not wrap My head around it this morning.
Have a great sunday everyone!
In love, light and true Dominance,
Lady Moon

I rather imagine you were feeling/laughing at the same wierd feeling I get when someone tells me I'm beautiful for a black woman. I never really know how to feel about such a statement, was the person being rude or are they just obtuse? It's easier to just laugh, pass said person over, tell a few friends the joke, and go about your day.

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RE: Just a thought - 1/7/2007 1:43:43 PM

slavejali

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Just a thought..

After looking over your profile..I noticed this journal entry:

quote:

Although I am thankful when someone is not interested and they say so.. the things that sort of crawls under My skin is that I write a profile, put thought into it and still have some be turned off by My being a woman of substance. I am not a stick figure boys. If a woman with curves and meat is something you are not looking for please save us both the time and do not write. I will not be offended. Some men like their Dominants poles just like I like My submissives older. It is just a preference in life.

Maybe he looked over your profile and addressed this issue because of what you have said here? Sometimes guys don't have a great way with words..but maybe he was trying his best to show you he didn't care about your size? Just a thought...

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RE: Just a thought - 1/7/2007 4:10:25 PM

MasDom

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errrr?
Just laughs....

What is every ones problem with bbw?
I mean what past the person inside matters?

But yeah maybe he's just confused.
However I think socially we should all speak more forwardly.

If he meant it in a bad way.
then what does it matter past the silence received.
And if not then he learns from his mistake and life go's on.

< Message edited by MasDom -- 1/7/2007 4:14:48 PM >

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