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losing sub urges when jacking off - 6/16/2011 5:16:53 PM

playwithcouples

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i hate to jack off, becaus eeverytime i do, i lose my desire to submit. i want to be a slave but i dont want to ever cumm again. does anyone else feel this way? does anyone else hate to make themselves cumm for this reason?

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RE: losing sub urges when jacking off - 6/16/2011 5:26:22 PM

poise

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While I won't ever say that I hate to cum, regardless of the means of doing so,
I would imagine you may be feeling a little guilt in your selfish pleasuring?
Are you breaking some agreed upon rule to not be jacking off?

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RE: losing sub urges when jacking off - 6/16/2011 5:29:45 PM

juliaoceania

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I never felt my masturbating was a sign of a lack of submission on my part.

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RE: losing sub urges when jacking off - 6/16/2011 5:55:25 PM

LillyBoPeep

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well i think orgasm affects men and women differently; most of the men i've dealt with don't want to do ANYTHING after an orgasm, but fall asleep, or watch TV. some of them will cuddle, but as a prelude to falling asleep (i really do not mind this about men, i think it's adorable actually).
also, most of the men i've met who are submissive are heavily motivated by sex. everything ties back into sex for most of them, even cleaning the house is a sexual turn-on. so once the orgasm comes along, the desire to do anything involving sex, including submission for some, goes away.

i don't think there's anything wrong with being a sex-motivated sub at all. i think this is just one of the ways the differences between men and women express themselves. a lot of females are sex-motivated, too, but orgasm doesn't tend to totally deplete us.

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RE: losing sub urges when jacking off - 6/16/2011 5:58:33 PM

anniezz338

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FR
Not me. my "jacking off" involves submissive fantasies

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RE: losing sub urges when jacking off - 6/16/2011 6:16:26 PM

Back2theFuture

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I have this problem too. Doing it yourself leaves you with feeling for "screw it".

But I am opposed to chastity(out side from the teasing and torturing when you can't get it up) as a enforcement for submission. I find that a dominated orgasm doesn't leave me with a diminished capacity for submission. Because masturbation is done for myself and my pleasure while dominated and forced orgasms are done for your dommes amusement and pleasure.

As far as chastity as as a method of control/motivation. I say I feel more submissive to a Domme who doesn't need to use it because since I am getting what I crave(Submissivly and sexually) I have no desires to disobey, wander or masturbate.

< Message edited by Back2theFuture -- 6/16/2011 6:17:37 PM >

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RE: losing sub urges when jacking off - 6/16/2011 6:17:27 PM

juliaoceania

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quote:

ORIGINAL: LillyBoPeep

well i think orgasm affects men and women differently; most of the men i've dealt with don't want to do ANYTHING after an orgasm, but fall asleep, or watch TV. some of them will cuddle, but as a prelude to falling asleep (i really do not mind this about men, i think it's adorable actually).
also, most of the men i've met who are submissive are heavily motivated by sex. everything ties back into sex for most of them, even cleaning the house is a sexual turn-on. so once the orgasm comes along, the desire to do anything involving sex, including submission for some, goes away.

i don't think there's anything wrong with being a sex-motivated sub at all. i think this is just one of the ways the differences between men and women express themselves. a lot of females are sex-motivated, too, but orgasm doesn't tend to totally deplete us.

I never said anything disparaging to him, I just simply stated my personal experience

edited to add, perhaps you were fast replying, in which case ignore this post...lol

< Message edited by juliaoceania -- 6/16/2011 6:18:02 PM >

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RE: losing sub urges when jacking off - 6/16/2011 6:20:13 PM

LillyBoPeep

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90% of the time, i'm fast-replying, i just don't remember to designate that.

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RE: losing sub urges when jacking off - 6/16/2011 6:23:26 PM

juliaoceania

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I realized after I posted that you probably were....

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RE: losing sub urges when jacking off - 6/16/2011 6:28:09 PM

Lucylastic

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Ive found many many males dont want to cum for that specific reason. being kept in chastity or denied orgasm is often a very submissive excitement , ejaculation can ruin it for some time.
JMNSHO

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RE: losing sub urges when jacking off - 6/16/2011 6:31:16 PM

LillyBoPeep

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Lucylastic

Ive found many many males dont want to cum for that specific reason. being kept in chastity or denied orgasm is often a very submissive excitement , ejaculation can ruin it for some time.
JMNSHO

that's really interesting, and i guess essentially what the OP is getting at.
it's so interesting how different people are.

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RE: losing sub urges when jacking off - 6/16/2011 6:32:22 PM

MaamJay

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I agree there is considerable difference between males and females with their response to orgasm. I have met a number of male subs whose submission turns off totally once they have cum, so the trick is to get them to do everything You want before You allow that! Have to say though I'd prefer a boy to also be motivated by a desire to serve rather than a purely sex-orientated desire.

To the OP - can understand your frustration for sure. It might be better if your orgasm was controlled by a D rather than jacking off, you may find you feel more submissive afterwards then. Try to also find joy in pleasing a D through service if you can, it may be in you somewhere!

Maam Jay aka violet[A]

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RE: losing sub urges when jacking off - 6/16/2011 6:39:32 PM

HeatherMcLeather

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quote:

does anyone else hate to make themselves cumm for this reason?

Not me. I love orgasms!! They're the best!! The more the merrier, gimme, gimme, gimme!

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RE: losing sub urges when jacking off - 6/16/2011 6:44:17 PM

Lucylastic

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quote:

ORIGINAL: LillyBoPeep

quote:

ORIGINAL: Lucylastic

Ive found many many males dont want to cum for that specific reason. being kept in chastity or denied orgasm is often a very submissive excitement , ejaculation can ruin it for some time.
JMNSHO

that's really interesting, and i guess essentially what the OP is getting at.
it's so interesting how different people are.

Absolutely...Im a orgasm junkie tho, the more the merrier:)

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RE: losing sub urges when jacking off - 6/16/2011 7:19:04 PM

mummyman321

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Lucylastic

Ive found many many males dont want to cum for that specific reason. being kept in chastity or denied orgasm is often a very submissive excitement , ejaculation can ruin it for some time.
JMNSHO

My preference to to stay tied up after I cumm until that wonderful subbie feeling comes back again

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RE: losing sub urges when jacking off - 6/16/2011 7:43:47 PM

juliaoceania

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quote:

ORIGINAL: MaamJay

I agree there is considerable difference between males and females with their response to orgasm. I have met a number of male subs whose submission turns off totally once they have cum, so the trick is to get them to do everything You want before You allow that! Have to say though I'd prefer a boy to also be motivated by a desire to serve rather than a purely sex-orientated desire.

To the OP - can understand your frustration for sure. It might be better if your orgasm was controlled by a D rather than jacking off, you may find you feel more submissive afterwards then. Try to also find joy in pleasing a D through service if you can, it may be in you somewhere!

Maam Jay aka violet[A]

I have to say, I really get a lot out of your posts. You are very kind to submissive men, and it shows in much of what you convey how you understand them. I really admire a dominant that demonstrates these qualities.

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RE: losing sub urges when jacking off - 6/16/2011 8:31:40 PM

sexisubi

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ill just say the hornier i am the better of a girl i am! but the person ill be with will know that and i make it pretty clear. they can decide if they wanna keep me in that state or if its time to move on to a new state. but it depends, i mean the dirtier stuff i might not be so happy to do. but rules and little things like that horny or not i do them cause i care and cause that's what i want.

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RE: losing sub urges when jacking off - 6/16/2011 8:53:59 PM

Lucylastic

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quote:

ORIGINAL: mummyman321

quote:

ORIGINAL: Lucylastic

Ive found many many males dont want to cum for that specific reason. being kept in chastity or denied orgasm is often a very submissive excitement , ejaculation can ruin it for some time.
JMNSHO

My preference to to stay tied up after I cumm until that wonderful subbie feeling comes back again

But of course:) fun to change it up tooo:) keeping you guessing and playing with your minds are the fun part

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RE: losing sub urges when jacking off - 6/16/2011 9:01:20 PM

ThundersCry

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I would rather have someone else whack me off -L-

IF you have been trained NOT to cum unless you have permission, then ya...you probably have some guilt...

SCREW guilt!

OH...the simple answer is....quit whackin` off....

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RE: losing sub urges when jacking off - 6/16/2011 11:16:05 PM

playwithcouples

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thank you all for your comments. i need a D!

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