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RE: The Dirtiest Word - 2/2/2011 8:10:58 PM   
Aynne88


Posts: 3873
Joined: 8/29/2008
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quote:

ORIGINAL: laurell3


quote:

ORIGINAL: Tantriqu

Romance is required, love is desired. Otherwise, he's just a 6-foot walking Hitachi.



LOL. I agree don't settle for less than you need to make a relationship fit your needs. We aren't any different than anyone else in any other relationship in the world and don't let anyone convince otherwise.




Well well...look who sauntered in . Missed you...*mwah*


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As long as people will shed the blood of innocent creatures there can be no peace, no liberty, no harmony between people. Slaughter and justice cannot dwell together.
—Isaac Bashevis Singer, writer and Nobel laureate (1902–1991)



(in reply to laurell3)
Profile   Post #: 21
RE: The Dirtiest Word - 2/2/2011 8:21:27 PM   
BurntKitty


Posts: 3340
Joined: 9/7/2010
From: Here To Eternity.
Status: offline 		Yes. Receiving roses, and lighting candles can very well lead to a night of romance & passion....after sensation play, of course.



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(in reply to Aynne88)
Profile   Post #: 22
RE: The Dirtiest Word - 2/2/2011 8:33:36 PM   
pittbunny


Posts: 8
Joined: 1/17/2011
Status: offline 		"In this lifestyle... is there room for real love and real romance?"

Ohhhh Yes! Real Love for and from my Master transformed me from a submissive to a slave.  The more i love Him, the more my submission and obedience grow and the deeper my need to serve Him.  The deeper my submission and obedience to Him, the more He loves me and the more romantic W/we become together. The lifestyle has made passion a substantial part of O/our life together.  Because of O/our M/s lifestyle, i am privileged to know real romance, true love and the deepest bonds of ownership.

(in reply to laurell3)
Profile   Post #: 23
RE: The Dirtiest Word - 2/2/2011 8:45:56 PM   
oceanwynds2


Posts: 66
Joined: 1/8/2011
Status: offline 		I am a romantic by heart. Many of the things I do from cooking/cleaning to sharing in a relationship has some element of romance. I love romantic notions. I love to write about it too. If this part is not accepted in me, i wither. I also believe some day I will find one who will and can embrace this part of me as well. In the meantime, when I get back to St Augustine, i will put my artist beanie on and sit sipping coffee in an outdoor cafe, dreaming romantic tales of a 'possible' dom for me.

(in reply to pittbunny)
Profile   Post #: 24
RE: The Dirtiest Word - 2/2/2011 10:49:48 PM   
SexyBossyBBW


Posts: 1693
Joined: 2/25/2010
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: puella
Is there room for romance in this (hate this term) lifestyle?
Absolutely!   Or I'm screwed.    I have imagined playing/enjoying the moment, without an emotional connection, but it makes me feel undervalued, or an undervalued object.   So, an emotional connection is a must, for me to be into my someone.

quote:

Honestly the term is getting more and more laughable even in vanilla circle
Well, it is sickening, the way cliques go out of their way to be different, by being more like the group at times.    Sure, there has to be some definition, but if one isn't into all of it, it's easy to feel like a misfit within this alternative lifestyle thing.

quote:

I cannot tell you how many have scoffed and laughed at such notions
Many people do this for their own reasons, not all of which are healthy, close to sane, or virtuous.   Love is kind of a subjective matter, so I cannot know the reason anyone would scoff at it.   For myself, there is what I feel for humanity, and  what I need to feel for a person who feeds whatever it is in me, that makes me physically and emotionally excited for/toward him.

quote:

If you think there is room and rightness for it, why, how?
The why?   I feel more alive, energetic, excited, optimistic about existing on this planet, when in love, or feeling it's possibility.   How?  It's the only way I can fathom a relationship; when there is a possibility I will fall in love with him.   How to be dominant, and love someone?   is just about being me, and being with one who inspires an open heart/soul in me.   Or how does one find and marry the lifestyle with love?   Don't know this answer yet, since it currently elludes me.   I have done it before, but it found me, not the other way around.    M

(in reply to puella)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: The Dirtiest Word - 2/2/2011 11:11:16 PM   
Arpig


Posts: 9930
Joined: 1/3/2006
From: Increasingly further from reality
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: weird123m


quote:

ORIGINAL: DarkSteven

Um, D/s is nothing more than a flavor for a relationship.  Romance is not excluded.



I agree wholeheartedly. Romance is just another part of any relationship.
I disagree, romance is the heart and soul of a relationship, when it goes the relationship is at an end.


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(in reply to weird123m)
Profile   Post #: 26
RE: The Dirtiest Word - 2/3/2011 2:56:36 AM   
SourandSweet


Posts: 66
Joined: 1/22/2011
Status: offline 		Romance is essential to me.  I don't mean the flowers and chocolates type stuff (though that's nice too of course).  I mean the little things which mean so much.

Like if he creeps up behind me and hugs me, or tells me he loves me out of the blue, or phones me just to say hi, or grabs my toes and tickles them.

I believe the honeymoon period only ends if one or both parties stops putting in those lil efforts to make the other person happy.

Re: the lifestyle stuff.  I'm not in a lifestyle.  I'm in a relationship which happens to be d/s.

:-)

Oops - how did that happen?  This was intended for a different thread.  I'm new - don't shout at me! :-)

Oh I didn't get it wrong after all - sigh - back to bed for the day I think.  It's gonna be one of those! :-)


< Message edited by SourandSweet -- 2/3/2011 3:37:15 AM >

(in reply to Arpig)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: The Dirtiest Word - 2/3/2011 3:25:55 AM   
Sundowner


Posts: 2549
Joined: 3/11/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Tantriqu

Romance is required, love is desired. Otherwise, he's just a 6-foot walking Hitachi.


Pssst - Tantriqu - where do I get one of those? I'm good on the romance bit but I could do with some help on the rest and owning one of those might make me attractive to women. Do they work with the UK power supply?


quote:

ORIGINAL: puella

Is there room for romance in this (hate this term) lifestyle?



No puella - not "room for" ; in my book it's an essential element.

Holding a sobbing girl who's just let you tie her up and beat her - the tying and the beating themselves - there's such a closeness and intimacy about that when the relationship has had a romantic content. Without a romantic element what one's indulging in is simply porn. That romantic element doesn't have to be the full orchestra with chocolates and roses - it can be as simple as just a look or a word.

When it's there then kink and depravity are purest joy; without it mere sleazy porn.




<edited for inept grammar>


< Message edited by Sundowner -- 2/3/2011 3:27:10 AM >

(in reply to Tantriqu)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: The Dirtiest Word - 2/3/2011 3:35:07 AM   
GreedyTop


Posts: 52100
Joined: 5/2/2007
From: Savannah, GA
Status: offline 		SunnyD *smooch*  I hate you.

Romance and love, IMO, are not things that are prohibited by this 'lifestyle'..

yet for some, they are nto required.  I know a few folks that WANT the wine and roses to be kept out of their dynamics

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Supreme Goddess of Snark
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Waiting for my madman in a Blue Box.

(in reply to Sundowner)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: The Dirtiest Word - 2/3/2011 4:03:39 AM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline 		For some people it's important, for others it isn't. You get to decide which you are and to insist on compatibility.

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Cynical and proud of it!


(in reply to laurell3)
Profile   Post #: 30
RE: The Dirtiest Word - 2/3/2011 4:03:43 AM   
kiwisub12


Posts: 4742
Joined: 1/11/2006
Status: offline 		Drive by hugs - the epitome of romance!

Love it - and him.

(in reply to GreedyTop)
Profile   Post #: 31
RE: The Dirtiest Word - 2/3/2011 4:20:03 AM   
Tantriqu


Posts: 2026
Joined: 12/29/2006
Status: offline
quote:

Pssst - Tantriqu - where do I get one of those? I'm good on the romance bit but I could do with some help on the rest and owning one of those might make me attractive to women. Do they work with the UK power supply?


I'm sure there are foot-long Hitachis that work with UK DC, but in the meantime:
1. Buy a roll of Polo mints [Lifesavers to Yanks]:
2. Bring each of them to orgasm with your tongue; no biting!

Excellent training for every man and his tongue.
Enjoy!

(in reply to Sundowner)
Profile   Post #: 32
RE: The Dirtiest Word - 2/3/2011 4:22:48 AM   
LillyBoPeep


Posts: 6873
Joined: 12/29/2010
Status: offline 		i totally believe there's room for romance.
totally.

(in reply to laurell3)
Profile   Post #: 33
RE: The Dirtiest Word - 2/3/2011 4:31:25 AM   
0ldhen


Posts: 2221
Joined: 12/27/2010
From: Henhouse in Trolltopia, Harleyville USA
Status: offline 		Without the love part for me there is no M/s.

I do not engage in casual play, never have. There is no point in it for me.

I've had lots of first contacts ask me "so, what is your kink". Then they get confused when i explain that i have only one personal kink, his. There is nothing so romantic to me as seeing his heat, his passion. That heat fires my own, because of that love.

Romance is alive an well in this lifestyle for many. What could be more romantic than being snuggled with your head on your One's knee watching a movie or talking quietly about your day.

< Message edited by 0ldhen -- 2/3/2011 4:44:10 AM >

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(in reply to puella)
Profile   Post #: 34
RE: The Dirtiest Word - 2/3/2011 4:40:24 AM   
GreedyTop


Posts: 52100
Joined: 5/2/2007
From: Savannah, GA
Status: offline 		Hen.. I am nopt talking casual.

I had a top locallly.. GREAT guy.. thought the WORLD of him (still do).. but there was never any 'romance' for us.  It was simply a "he needs/she needs' kinda thing.

it was what we both needed at that time.

but I do still think so highly of him that I have referred others to him as he is a talented and experienced top/dom.

*shrug*

_____________________________

polysnortatious
Supreme Goddess of Snark
CHARTER MEMBER: Lance's Fag Hags!
Waiting for my madman in a Blue Box.

(in reply to 0ldhen)
Profile   Post #: 35
RE: The Dirtiest Word - 2/3/2011 4:42:21 AM   
BonesFromAsh


Posts: 1362
Joined: 6/17/2010
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: puella
In this lifestyle... is there room for real love and real romance?


For me, yes.

In the past, I've settled for less and found it to be nothing but empty actions.

I want/need/deserve more.

(in reply to puella)
Profile   Post #: 36
RE: The Dirtiest Word - 2/3/2011 4:53:19 AM   
Sundowner


Posts: 2549
Joined: 3/11/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Tantriqu

quote:

Pssst - Tantriqu - where do I get one of those? I'm good on the romance bit but I could do with some help on the rest and owning one of those might make me attractive to women. Do they work with the UK power supply?


I'm sure there are foot-long Hitachis that work with UK DC, but in the meantime:
1. Buy a roll of Polo mints [Lifesavers to Yanks]:
2. Bring each of them to orgasm with your tongue; no biting!

Excellent training for every man and his tongue.
Enjoy!



<grins at T>

What I learned - and it so works - is to lie there contentedly and to keep spelling out the alphabet (in caps of course) with one's tongue until she screams. This is good fun for the lying-there-breathing-in-pure-pussy person as well as for the recipient and it never fails. I commend it to the House.






(in reply to Tantriqu)
Profile   Post #: 37
RE: The Dirtiest Word - 2/3/2011 5:35:27 AM   
WinsomeDefiance


Posts: 6719
Joined: 8/7/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Sundowner

<grins at T>

What I learned - and it so works - is to lie there contentedly and to keep spelling out the alphabet (in caps of course) with one's tongue until she screams. This is good fun for the lying-there-breathing-in-pure-pussy person as well as for the recipient and it never fails. I commend it to the House.


I suddenly have this urge to invite SD over to "take dictation."

OP - genuine heartfelt romance, is much to be desired. I dislike disingenuous overtures, however.

< Message edited by WinsomeDefiance -- 2/3/2011 5:47:24 AM >

(in reply to Sundowner)
Profile   Post #: 38
RE: The Dirtiest Word - 2/3/2011 7:54:40 AM   
sexyred1


Posts: 8998
Joined: 8/9/2007
Status: offline 		sorry messed up the quotes

< Message edited by sexyred1 -- 2/3/2011 7:55:17 AM >

(in reply to SexyBossyBBW)
Profile   Post #: 39
RE: The Dirtiest Word - 2/3/2011 8:13:06 AM   
CreativeDominant


Posts: 11032
Joined: 3/11/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sexyred1

There is room for love and romance in any relationship, the trick is to maintain it and not give up on it.

I believe that in our world right now, people are very disposable and at the first sign of distraction, or disagreement, they bolt for greener pastures.

I think there is a tremendous amount of cynicism about love these days and how tragic that is.

I have experienced tremendous love in this lifestyle and it is hard to walk away from.

The above speaks to an awful lot of what I feel, especially the part I have made bold.

I sometimes wish I could make My heart harder and/or not feel things as deeply as I do and/or not be as sappy...would mean a lot less pain. But I've tried to do that before and did not like Myself much. ~shrugs~ Perhaps I could learn to though...tis tempting.

(in reply to sexyred1)
Profile   Post #: 40
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