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The Dirtiest Word - 2/2/2011 4:14:55 PM   
puella


Posts: 2457
Joined: 12/2/2004
Status: offline 		Is there room for romance in this (hate this term) lifestyle?

Honestly the term is getting more and more laughable even in vanilla circles.

But that is probably best for another space.

In this lifestyle... is there room for real love and real romance?

I cannot tell you how many have scoffed and laughed at such notions.

If you think there is room and rightness for it, why, how?

If not... I suppose the same explanation should be had.

Hopefully, this will be an interesting and enlightening dialogue.


< Message edited by puella -- 2/2/2011 4:16:08 PM >

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We must move forward, not backward, upward, not forward, and always twirling, twirling, twirling towards freedom...... The Simpsons

War is God's way of teaching Americans geography." ...Ambrose Bierce

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RE: The Dirtiest Word - 2/2/2011 4:53:53 PM   
osf


Posts: 3288
Joined: 10/19/2009
Status: offline 		why not?

as long as the D doesn't let it get in the way

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all around nice guy and creative misogynist

i'm not very skilled so i just hit harder

i want a woman to make into the woman she never wanted to become

(in reply to puella)
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RE: The Dirtiest Word - 2/2/2011 4:57:08 PM   
NocturnalStalker


Posts: 3858
Joined: 12/4/2010
Status: offline 		Of course there is.

I love you!


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"The road I walk is paved in gold to glorify my platinum soul."

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RE: The Dirtiest Word - 2/2/2011 5:01:06 PM   
VaguelyCurious


Posts: 5264
Joined: 12/2/2009
From: United Kingdom
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: puella

If you think there is room and rightness for it, why, how?

Why? Because it makes people happy, and things that make people happy are good.

How? Someone brings flowers, or lights candles, or gets out of bed early and makes breakfast. The same things that would be romantic outside of a D/s relationship...

People are still people, even when their relationships are 'lifestyle' ones.

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Sthetic on FetLife.




(in reply to puella)
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RE: The Dirtiest Word - 2/2/2011 5:02:41 PM   
BKSir


Posts: 4037
Joined: 4/8/2008
From: Salt Lake City, UT
Status: offline 		Without a doubt! I wouldn't have someone as a pet whom I didn't love dearly and completely. There are, of course, different types of love, and different ways of showing them, but still, that doesn't mean I can't wish to take my pet out to a nice dinner blah blah blah, or bring him some flowers or some little token, just because it's Tuesday. Why? Because I can, and because he probably does the same for me. :)

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I am the voices in your head.

BiggKatt Studios

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RE: The Dirtiest Word - 2/2/2011 5:07:49 PM   
DarkSteven


Posts: 28072
Joined: 5/2/2008
Status: offline 		Um, D/s is nothing more than a flavor for a relationship.  Romance is not excluded.


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"You women....

The small-breasted ones want larger breasts. The large-breasted ones want smaller ones. The straight-haired ones curl their hair, and the curly-haired ones straighten theirs...

Quit fretting. We men love you."

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RE: The Dirtiest Word - 2/2/2011 5:31:58 PM   
Musicmystery


Posts: 30259
Joined: 3/14/2005
Status: offline
quote:

If you think there is room and rightness for it, why, how?

Well, I'm in a wonderful romance with a wonderful girl.

We make room, and consider it important.

(in reply to puella)
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RE: The Dirtiest Word - 2/2/2011 5:37:34 PM   
weird123m


Posts: 23
Joined: 8/20/2010
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: DarkSteven

Um, D/s is nothing more than a flavor for a relationship.  Romance is not excluded.



I agree wholeheartedly. Romance is just another part of any relationship.

(in reply to DarkSteven)
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RE: The Dirtiest Word - 2/2/2011 5:48:13 PM   
IronBear


Posts: 9008
Joined: 6/19/2005
From: Beenleigh, Qld, Australia
Status: offline 		Romance is always going to be important in a personal relationship and even in an emotionally invested relationship with a special, favorite project. It is what my 2nd wife would complain about, the Grand Passion. Romantics tend to be passionate. 

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Iron Bear

Master of Bruin Cottage

http://www.bruincottage.org

Your attitude, words & actions are yours. Take responsibility for them and the consequences they incur.

D.I.L.L.I.G.A.F.

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RE: The Dirtiest Word - 2/2/2011 6:04:22 PM   
LPslittleclip


Posts: 1163
Joined: 9/29/2007
Status: offline 		yes there most certainly is room for love and romance in the lifestyle. my Mistress and i are very much in love with each other. the lifestyle is no diffrent than any other in that way

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proud to serve the awsome
LadyPact

(in reply to IronBear)
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RE: The Dirtiest Word - 2/2/2011 6:08:01 PM   
KnightofMists


Posts: 7149
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline 		I strongly believe that Love and Romance is very possible for the right individuals within relationships that also happen to have some sort of authority dynamic going on. One doesn't exclude the other... but one doesn't mean the other is necessary either.



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Knight of Mists

An Optimal relationship is achieved when the individuals do what is best for themselves and their relationship.

(in reply to puella)
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RE: The Dirtiest Word - 2/2/2011 6:10:39 PM   
sexyred1


Posts: 8998
Joined: 8/9/2007
Status: offline 		There is room for love and romance in any relationship, the trick is to maintain it and not give up on it.

I believe that in our world right now, people are very disposable and at the first sign of distraction, or disagreement, they bolt for greener pastures.

I think there is a tremendous amount of cynicism about love these days and how tragic that is.

I have experienced tremendous love in this lifestyle and it is hard to walk away from.

< Message edited by sexyred1 -- 2/2/2011 6:16:23 PM >

(in reply to LPslittleclip)
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RE: The Dirtiest Word - 2/2/2011 6:14:55 PM   
slaveluci


Posts: 4294
Joined: 3/2/2007
From: Little Rock, AR
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: puella

Is there room for romance in this (hate this term) lifestyle?

quote:

If you think there is room and rightness for it, why, how?

Yes there certainly is. Why do I think this? Because I've found it. I KNOW it's possible because I live it.......luci



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(in reply to puella)
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RE: The Dirtiest Word - 2/2/2011 6:27:30 PM   
IronBear


Posts: 9008
Joined: 6/19/2005
From: Beenleigh, Qld, Australia
Status: offline 		The longer I stay her (In CM), the more cynical I become and the more estranged I become from the public aspects of my local BDSM/KINK community. The cynic in me states emphatically that whilst I remain in SE Queensland I shall never find she whom I would have in my collar. The romantic in me states just as emphatically, that she is there waiting for the right circumstances to occure so that the magick can be released and we can  meet, form the desired dynamic with in a M/s relationship. I rather think (my pragmatic self) I need to be in the position to move south to NW Tasmania and commence nut, black truffle and rabbit farming. I'll be so jolly busy that I'll need a hit over the head to recognise the "dream slave" when she appears.


_____________________________

Iron Bear

Master of Bruin Cottage

http://www.bruincottage.org

Your attitude, words & actions are yours. Take responsibility for them and the consequences they incur.

D.I.L.L.I.G.A.F.

(in reply to slaveluci)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: The Dirtiest Word - 2/2/2011 6:37:07 PM   
littlewonder


Posts: 15659
Status: offline 		There is in our relationship. We never seem to have any shortage of it and we both enjoy and like having it that way.

I couldn't imagine having a relationship without it.

(in reply to IronBear)
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RE: The Dirtiest Word - 2/2/2011 7:34:45 PM   
Twoshoes


Posts: 1218
Joined: 7/27/2010
Status: offline 		An estatic yes.

(in reply to littlewonder)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: The Dirtiest Word - 2/2/2011 7:37:55 PM   
Tantriqu


Posts: 2026
Joined: 12/29/2006
Status: offline 		Romance is required, love is desired. Otherwise, he's just a 6-foot walking Hitachi.

(in reply to Twoshoes)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: The Dirtiest Word - 2/2/2011 7:43:11 PM   
puella


Posts: 2457
Joined: 12/2/2004
Status: offline 		Heheh... brava, doll!

I never reply to my own thread! :)

_____________________________

We must move forward, not backward, upward, not forward, and always twirling, twirling, twirling towards freedom...... The Simpsons

War is God's way of teaching Americans geography." ...Ambrose Bierce

"Don't you oppress me!"....Stan/Loretta

(in reply to Tantriqu)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: The Dirtiest Word - 2/2/2011 7:46:12 PM   
Aynne88


Posts: 3873
Joined: 8/29/2008
Status: offline 		God yes. We are madly wildly passionately in love. Even when we are discussing who is changing the oil or picking up coffee. . Love still reigns supreme.


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As long as people will shed the blood of innocent creatures there can be no peace, no liberty, no harmony between people. Slaughter and justice cannot dwell together.
—Isaac Bashevis Singer, writer and Nobel laureate (1902–1991)



(in reply to Tantriqu)
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RE: The Dirtiest Word - 2/2/2011 7:51:57 PM   
laurell3


Posts: 6577
Joined: 5/5/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Tantriqu

Romance is required, love is desired. Otherwise, he's just a 6-foot walking Hitachi.



LOL. I agree don't settle for less than you need to make a relationship fit your needs. We aren't any different than anyone else in any other relationship in the world and don't let anyone convince otherwise.



_____________________________

I cannot be defined by moments in my life, but must be considered for by the entirety of my existence.

When you fail to consider that I am the best judge for what is right for me, all of your opinions become suspect to me.

(in reply to Tantriqu)
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