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My weird double standard lol - 10/3/2010 9:58:38 AM

odysseyIndeed

Posts: 121
Joined: 9/30/2009
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I am female. I am submissive. I'm a little masochistic. I recently discovered the 'browse photos' link on the other side. I have been looking through some of the photos today and have begun to wonder ...

Is it wrong that when I see images of male genitalia being manipulated, bound, locked, or otherwise used in what looks like very painful ways, I have this overwhelming urge to go and "rescue" them? I realize on an intellectual level that they enjoy what is being done to them and they wouldn't want to be 'rescued' but I still very much feel that way.

I don't feel the same way when I view similar things being done to women though. I may or may not care to experience what some of the women are going through, but I have no desire to stop it from happening to them. I'm trying to figure out why.

Does anyone else feel this way? Does anyone know why someone would? I'd like to know what Y'all think please.
(I hope I put this in the right forum. I've not started a topic before.)

Post #: 1

RE: My weird double standard lol - 10/3/2010 10:05:11 AM

DarkSteven

Posts: 28072
Joined: 5/2/2008
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That's funny. I have the same thing! I love seeing women tied up, breasts clamped, and spanked, but when I see the same thing done to a man, I just think that that looks wrong!

_____________________________

"You women....

The small-breasted ones want larger breasts. The large-breasted ones want smaller ones. The straight-haired ones curl their hair, and the curly-haired ones straighten theirs...

Quit fretting. We men love you."

(in reply to odysseyIndeed)

Post #: 2

RE: My weird double standard lol - 10/3/2010 10:17:18 AM

odysseyIndeed

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Joined: 9/30/2009
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To me it looks like it would be just too painful to bear. Maybe I'm too gentle lol

(in reply to DarkSteven)

Post #: 3

RE: My weird double standard lol - 10/3/2010 10:20:02 AM

Lockit

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Joined: 5/7/2007
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I think it is because we are taught to love the cock, pet it, kiss it, be nice to the cock! Pretty lil cock, oh you like that don't you? Kiss, kiss, pet, pet, num, num, num... Don't hurt the little cock! You be good to the pretty little cock and it will be good to you. We grew up knowing just where to take a man down... his balls... so bad boy, kick and it's all done. Love the cock or hate it, you knew what to do and the power of each.

The thing is, that cock isn't as fragile as we often think it is and some of them really like that mean stuff! lol I still cringe at certain things... but I'm getting over it! lol

I cringe at some pictures I've seen of women too... especially breast torture. OMG! lol

< Message edited by Lockit -- 10/3/2010 10:21:43 AM >

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Post #: 4

RE: My weird double standard lol - 10/3/2010 10:22:46 AM

KatyLied

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From: Pennsylvania
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I don't understand it, but I also have no need to rescue a man who is obviously enjoying a good time!

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(in reply to Lockit)

Post #: 5

RE: My weird double standard lol - 10/3/2010 10:23:44 AM

LadyRian

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Joined: 9/5/2010
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I get an overwhelming urge to flog them. But then, that's just me...

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"Dodging bullets since 2010"

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Post #: 6

RE: My weird double standard lol - 10/3/2010 12:42:37 PM

LadyPact

Posts: 32566
Status: offline

Ha! I don't feel that way at all. Not to make light of your post, OP. You just have to look at it from another way.

You say that you are a little masochistic. When you are enjoying your play time, do you really want to be rescued? Guess what? They feel the same way. Why would you want to relieve them of their delicious torments?

The reason that you might feel that you want to rescue them is that the only possible reaction that you can have is empathy. You have no real way to know how it felt to be in those pictures because you don't have the right equipment to make a comparison. In your mind, you have only imagined the situation as you think it must be, rather than the way it really is for them. There's no way for you to transpose it in your mind because it revolves around a penis, which is foreign to your personal experience of your own body.

_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

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Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

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(in reply to LadyRian)

Post #: 7

RE: My weird double standard lol - 10/3/2010 2:47:36 PM

Zevar

Posts: 801
Status: offline

quote:

Does anyone else feel this way? Does anyone know why someone would? I'd like to know what Y'all think please.

As far as sadistic acts toward any human being they are not acts which are stimulating to any degree from my perceptive. But then I am not a sadist. Obviously there are those who are masochistic thus do bond with sadism. Much like if someone is mutually involved in acts of sadism then of course this is what iwould be appealing and pleasurable.

Why you find acts of sadism unappealing and are inclined with urges to relieve a man who is being sadistically acted upon more than likely could be related to your desire to be pleasing to men from a submissive standpoint.

If you are inclined to please men and view this as your primary role in relation to men and then see them in position(s) of being acted upon in ways that appear to not be pleasing from your perspective then naturally you would be inclined to relieve them from what you perceive as unappealing toward men.

I would say, perhaps you might consider understanding that your difference in thinking is none other than what works for you and is perfectly ok as long as your thinking does not infringe on the rights of others personal boundaries then by all means own your thinking and let it be what it is, yours!

Take good care of you!

(in reply to odysseyIndeed)

Post #: 8

RE: My weird double standard lol - 10/3/2010 3:03:12 PM

lally2

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Joined: 4/16/2009
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there was a clip once of a guy being repeatedly kicked in the groin - hard! he was lying on the floor in a sort of foetal position - having never had a pair of balls i cant really imagine that pain but ive been told its crippling and ive seen a guy drop to his knees after a football hit him there. - for me its unimaginable to want that level of agony, if i felt anything atall toward the guy in the clip it would be more along the lines of being curious to know how he could endure that and risk damage. i suppose if id been in the room id have had to leave or i might have been tempted to scream 'Stop!'

and yes breast torture for me is one of those things i look at as a woman and think 'Nope, nope, never' - mine are just way too heavy and tender for that - and when they turn all purple -

- when i see pics like that i get the same feeling of needing to leave the room or ill be tempted to cut the rope and rub them better

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So all I have to do in order to serve him, is to work out exactly how improbable he is, feed that figure into the finite improbability generator, give him a fresh cup of really hot tea ... and turn him on!

(in reply to Zevar)

Post #: 9

RE: My weird double standard lol - 10/3/2010 3:12:51 PM

Lockit

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Joined: 5/7/2007
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lally, I remember that clip well! It was one of my favorites! Not because of what it showed, because that was hard to take and I did wince(!), but because of the responses of men all over the site! ROFL! They even started a thread on that one! Men all over in journals were bitching and wincing and doing all sorts of contortions! It was funnier than anything else at the time! I still laugh thinking about it. I wanted it gone until I saw the response to it! lol

_____________________________

No matter how old a woman gets, some men will think she was born yesterday! ROFL... I love this place!

(in reply to lally2)

Post #: 10

RE: My weird double standard lol - 10/3/2010 3:15:29 PM

LadyRian

Posts: 486
Joined: 9/5/2010
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I can understand, from the Sadistic aspect, why they would desire, actually need sensations like this, and as Lady Pact so eloquently stated, Why would I want to relieve them of their delicious torments? However, such things as kicking, etc, has to be done properly. From what I understand there is technique which minimises permanent damage to the male submissive, but it has to be done right, otherwise disaster ensues. The same goes for breast bondage. (There's proper technique for everything, or had better be...)
A Dominant needs to be scrupulously careful when engaging in potentially harmful acts, but it can be done "right" so to speak.

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"Dodging bullets since 2010"

(in reply to lally2)

Post #: 11

RE: My weird double standard lol - 10/3/2010 4:44:10 PM

poise

Posts: 9509
Joined: 7/3/2010
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I shared a similar feeling of bewilderment, although not for the physical pain they might experience, (ouchies!) but more for what I imagined was the crushing of their self esteem/ego/pride by findommes. It wasn’t so much that I didn’t understand the findommes interest in this, but the way their profiles or threads were worded seemed so insulting and derogatory, that only the most vulnerable or gullible man would fall for it. This conflicted a great deal with the respect and high esteem I hold for men. A very wise poster here made me realize that there are many men from all walks off life that are lining up for this, and their eyes are wide open. I feel slightly better for knowing this, and hope I have learned to be less judgmental of kinks I may not always understand.

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When the path ignites a soul, there’s no remaining in place.

(in reply to odysseyIndeed)

Post #: 12

RE: My weird double standard lol - 10/3/2010 5:01:30 PM

odysseyIndeed

Posts: 121
Joined: 9/30/2009
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact
The reason that you might feel that you want to rescue them is that the only possible reaction that you can have is empathy. You have no real way to know how it felt to be in those pictures because you don't have the right equipment to make a comparison. In your mind, you have only imagined the situation as you think it must be, rather than the way it really is for them. There's no way for you to transpose it in your mind because it revolves around a penis, which is foreign to your personal experience of your own body.

This makes a lot of sense to me. I guess I've just always been so careful not to cause any pain that it kind of unnerves me to see.

I also remember people talking about the man who was getting kicked hard. Seems like some people were trying to get them to take it off the site at the time, but I may be misremembering.

quote:

ORIGINAL: Zevar
I would say, perhaps you might consider understanding that your difference in thinking is none other than what works for you and is perfectly ok as long as your thinking does not infringe on the rights of others personal boundaries then by all means own your thinking and let it be what it is, yours!

I promise not to slip into my tights and cape and save someone who doesn't wanna be saved :D

(in reply to LadyPact)

Post #: 13

RE: My weird double standard lol - 10/3/2010 5:37:06 PM

DarkSteven

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Joined: 5/2/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: odysseyIndeed

I promise not to slip into my tights and cape and save someone who doesn't wanna be saved :D

But you ARE willing to slip into the tights and cape, right?

_____________________________

"You women....

The small-breasted ones want larger breasts. The large-breasted ones want smaller ones. The straight-haired ones curl their hair, and the curly-haired ones straighten theirs...

Quit fretting. We men love you."

(in reply to odysseyIndeed)

Post #: 14

RE: My weird double standard lol - 10/3/2010 7:10:45 PM

Zevar

Posts: 801
Status: offline

quote:

quote:

ORIGINAL: Zevar
I would say, perhaps you might consider understanding that your difference in thinking is none other than what works for you and is perfectly ok as long as your thinking does not infringe on the rights of others personal boundaries then by all means own your thinking and let it be what it is, yours!

I promise not to slip into my tights and cape and save someone who doesn't wanna be saved :D

You do know that promising to not jump into your tights and cape does not exclude you very slowly pulling them on, inch by inch until of course you have accomplished suiting yourself as required for the occasion. Correct? As far as the cape if you do not fasten it tightly it is bound to fly away, which of course would ruin the whole tights and cape fantasy scenario. However since you promised; Very Well!

Take care!

(in reply to odysseyIndeed)

Post #: 15

RE: My weird double standard lol - 10/3/2010 7:20:42 PM

lovingpet

Posts: 4270
Joined: 6/19/2005
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~FR~

When I see a man in a clearly painful and precarious position, it just makes me wonder how I could do it better or make matters worse. I either get all giddy hoping my partner will do ouchie things to me or imagining playing with the little subly one myself when I see a girl in such a situation. Then again, I am not entirely nice.

lovingpet

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Post #: 16

RE: My weird double standard lol - 10/3/2010 7:57:15 PM

odysseyIndeed

Posts: 121
Joined: 9/30/2009
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: DarkSteven

quote:

ORIGINAL: odysseyIndeed

I promise not to slip into my tights and cape and save someone who doesn't wanna be saved :D

But you ARE willing to slip into the tights and cape, right?

Just as soon as I see the signal

(in reply to DarkSteven)

Post #: 17

RE: My weird double standard lol - 10/3/2010 7:58:35 PM

odysseyIndeed

Posts: 121
Joined: 9/30/2009
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: lovingpet

~FR~

When I see a man in a clearly painful and precarious position, it just makes me wonder how I could do it better or make matters worse. I either get all giddy hoping my partner will do ouchie things to me or imagining playing with the little subly one myself when I see a girl in such a situation. Then again, I am not entirely nice.

lovingpet

Ah, well there's the difference. I'm entirely nice

(in reply to lovingpet)

Post #: 18

RE: My weird double standard lol - 10/3/2010 8:18:11 PM

sexyred1

Posts: 8998
Joined: 8/9/2007
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Interesting thread...I myself could care less what others do as it does not affect me. What annoys me, however, is when I am forced to see men or women in graphic photos upon opening CM or browsing profiles as the first photo. I understand putting whatever image you want after the FIRST photo, but honestly, sometimes I see photos that make me remember my grandfather's butcher shop.

(in reply to odysseyIndeed)

Post #: 19

RE: My weird double standard lol - 10/3/2010 8:35:41 PM

submissivemale22

Posts: 428
Joined: 3/4/2008
From: CinCity
Status: offline

interesting. i posted a similar thread once offering my opinion that male doms represented the pinnacle of creepiness (a position which i defended quite masterfully), and was subsequently banned for many months.

(in reply to odysseyIndeed)

Post #: 20

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