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RE: No one really knows themselves.... - 3/20/2010 11:33:12 AM   
MichiganHeadmast


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I won't truly know myself until I've read my autobiography.

That is, if I can stomach the tedium.

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RE: No one really knows themselves.... - 3/20/2010 1:21:48 PM   
juliaoceania


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quote:

ORIGINAL: NorthernGent


quote:

ORIGINAL: juliaoceania

How I might react to an extreme situation is not a predetermined thing.



Agreed - anything less suggests we would all act in the same manner - which isn't the case. And we always have a choice - even when someone holds a gun to your head.


The question is how much of how we react is determined by the culture we live in rather than by some personal mechanism of decision making internal to the individual... in other words, how many of us are just reproducing culture and cultural expectations... even when we are under extreme circumstances? How much of what we do has anything to do with individual choice?


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RE: No one really knows themselves.... - 3/20/2010 1:47:45 PM   
LadyAngelika


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Julia, I refered earlier in this thread to cognitive mapping of the decision making process in the field of management sciences. In this case, they aren't so concerned with how someone came to making decisions the way they do but rather when they make a decision, how closely is that decision aligned with what is expected of them and how much of it is based in inherit morals and ethics. It's not as simple as that, but that is one of the core ideas.

We can nature/nurture debate it till we are blue in the face and while origins of who we are and how we have come to be are fascinating, I think a great deal of what we have become, what we know of ourselves and where are we headed is equally if not more compelling.

That said, I'll also add the dimension that even if I'm very self-aware, I am looking at myself through a very subjective lens. Great feedback is that people in my immediate environment tend to see me much the way I do from the feedback I get. But then again, I tend to hang out with people who's view of the world resemble mine. To someone who is more objective and looking at me through a different lens, I might seem like a very different person. They are also bringing in their subjectivity and their perceptions. That is why even though psychometric tests to understand someone's personality are grand, very few are able to be administered without the inherent subjectivity of the one formulating the questions.

- LA


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RE: No one really knows themselves.... - 3/20/2010 3:35:07 PM   
kittinSol


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quote:

ORIGINAL: NorthernGent

An interesting aside is that on the Titanic - by all accounts - it genuinely was a case of 'women and children first' while in other shipping disasters the number of men in relation to women and children who have survived suggests there was no sense of 'women and children' first [...].



The fact that the Titanic sank so fast made people react quickly, and it gave them less time to reflect on their sacrifice, hence why men gallantly made way for women and children. This is why they think so many women and children survived the disaster. On the Lusitania, on the other hand, the fact that the ship sank so slowly gave way to a generalised panic (people had that much more time to reflect on the inevitability of death): that opened the doors to shoving and pushing the weakest out of the way. And noble ideals got stamped on by those that wished to live...

And the sharks ate the women and the children first.

The Guardian - Science - March 2010 .

quote:


I wonder how much your cultural traditions can trump personal instinct when push comes to shove?


Quite ...

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RE: No one really knows themselves.... - 3/20/2010 3:41:38 PM   
NorthernGent


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quote:

ORIGINAL: kittinSol

The fact that the Titanic sank so fast made people react quickly, and it gave them less time to reflect on their sacrifice, hence why men gallantly made way for women and children. This is why they think so many women and children survived the disaster. On the Lusitania, on the other hand, the fact that the ship sank so slowly gave way to a generalised panic (people had that much more time to reflect on the inevitability of death): that opened the doors to shoving and pushing the weakest out of the way. And noble ideals got stamped on by those that wished to live...

quote:



I'd imagine a sinking ship would bring you to your senses pretty quickly. Who are 'they'?

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RE: No one really knows themselves.... - 3/20/2010 3:53:36 PM   
SL4V3M4YB3


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Perhaps everyone on the Titanic thought they would get into a lifeboat at some stage but by the time the reality set in that this wasn't true the women and children had already left.

On the Lusitania however, which occurred after the Titanic sinking, people were mindful of the previous tragedy and did not just wait for their turn.

Lusitania is either a disease or a porn star.


< Message edited by SL4V3M4YB3 -- 3/20/2010 3:54:14 PM >


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RE: No one really knows themselves.... - 3/20/2010 3:55:42 PM   
kittinSol


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quote:

ORIGINAL: NorthernGent
I'd imagine a sinking ship would bring you to your senses pretty quickly. Who are 'they'?


"They" are the scientists who published the study in the journal of the Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences: "Interaction of natural survival instincts and internalized social norms exploring the Titanic and Lusitania disasters." . It's quite fascinating.

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RE: No one really knows themselves.... - 3/20/2010 3:59:16 PM   
kittinSol


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When I wrote "fast", I meant "slowly" - I completely misunderstood the gist of the study , because I have a blonde brain.

The results remain .

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RE: No one really knows themselves.... - 3/20/2010 8:53:31 PM   
juliaoceania


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quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyAngelika

Julia, I refered earlier in this thread to cognitive mapping of the decision making process in the field of management sciences. In this case, they aren't so concerned with how someone came to making decisions the way they do but rather when they make a decision, how closely is that decision aligned with what is expected of them and how much of it is based in inherit morals and ethics. It's not as simple as that, but that is one of the core ideas.

We can nature/nurture debate it till we are blue in the face and while origins of who we are and how we have come to be are fascinating, I think a great deal of what we have become, what we know of ourselves and where are we headed is equally if not more compelling.

That said, I'll also add the dimension that even if I'm very self-aware, I am looking at myself through a very subjective lens. Great feedback is that people in my immediate environment tend to see me much the way I do from the feedback I get. But then again, I tend to hang out with people who's view of the world resemble mine. To someone who is more objective and looking at me through a different lens, I might seem like a very different person. They are also bringing in their subjectivity and their perceptions. That is why even though psychometric tests to understand someone's personality are grand, very few are able to be administered without the inherent subjectivity of the one formulating the questions.

- LA



I think the problem with psych tests is that they are ethnocentric and they claim some objectivity when they truly are subjective...

I also think that above someone spoke about when the boats sank whether men stayed on board, or fought for a space in the lifeboat... well that would be a culturally specific value, letting women and children off first. In some cultures saving wee ones would seem wasteful when adults old enough to provide food for the group take a priority. This makes rational sense in terms of the world that both groups hale from... In one there is honor associated with giving up one's life for others.. in the other group it is saving one's life because you know the group counts on you. It is a painful choice that mothers in famine drenched regions face... do they eat and deprive their kids of a portion of food, or do they give up the food and starve... if they starve who looks out for the children?

Culture provides a framework with which to answer such dilemmas, and to be honest, while our desire to survive will often overcome culture because it is a basic instinct, what we find morally and ethically correct is often a function of nurture as opposed to nature... we may go against and resist what we were taught, but even then we are operating in resistance...in other words we are operating in rebellion to what we were raised...

Very few people completely go against the taboos in their culture. An example: most of us are not cannibals, and will only go against this taboo when there is no way else to survive... and then our culture temporarily suspends the prohibition against eating human flesh so that a person can survive... those who have to go against this taboo as a function of survival often are scarred from it emotionally, but society does not hold them at fault for going against this taboo. On the other hand, a person who chooses cannibalism is considered the lowest of the low in our society... this is one of our strongest taboo, and it is a cultural taboo which other cultures do not universally share (most but not all adhere to this taboo). My point is that some of our ethics are indeed nurture, not nature... in fact most of them are culturally determined from who it is acceptable to date to what station in society that we should aspire to. If we go against those cultural prescriptions we can be ostracized, punished, shunned... What we are capable of under distress may be different, but most of us will not go against the most powerful of taboos unless there is no choice. I think most people are willing to give themselves up for their social group out of loyalty and love, although how far that altruism should go is also culturally determined....




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RE: No one really knows themselves.... - 3/20/2010 9:14:01 PM   
TheHeretic


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quote:

ORIGINAL: NorthernGent
what are you capable of in extreme circumstances?



That's a funny thing, North.  I'm both the guy who has stolen food when hungry without a thought to anything but not geting caught, and the fucking moron who runs into a burning house and put out the fire before the fire dept arrived.  A woman with a lifetime hiostory of mental illness and suicide attempts once accused me of having a hero complex, when I wouldn't get out of her house when she told me to.  I was very grateful that same night, that when the cops arrived, they never asked me for ID because there were at least three warrants for my arrest at the time.

Perhaps I know I'm capable of some very stupid shit?

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RE: No one really knows themselves.... - 3/20/2010 9:19:25 PM   
LadyAngelika


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quote:


I think the problem with psych tests is that they are ethnocentric and they claim some objectivity when they truly are subjective.


I've seen some that are actually pretty successful at taking a lot of that out.

I never said culture didn't have an impact. I know it has a huge impact. You asked: "The question is how much of how we react is determined by the culture we live in rather than by some personal mechanism of decision making internal to the individual... " so I was simply offering a way of going about it.

If you are interested, I can give you references via CM mail but unfortunately they are all in French for the moment.

- LA


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RE: No one really knows themselves.... - 3/20/2010 10:58:25 PM   
NeedToUseYou


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I'm probably capable of doing just about anything given the right set of conditions.

Like if you tortured me for years, and the only way to end it was suicide, well, I'm probably capable of killing myself, even.

If you offered me a million dollars to kill a stranger completely free and clear of prosecution or repercussion, I'd have to think about it. I could rationalize that I could save more than one person with a million. Are the lives of two worth more than one? What are the odds I'm killing a saint, versus the criminally insane.

If given the opportunity to rule the world, I'd either become an extreme tyrant or be written up as the most benevolent leader in written history. It depends on how things evolved.  Billions dead is a possibility, or the end of basic wants is another.

If my hand were stuck in a mechanical device, and was pulling me in, I 99% sure I could cut it off.

If you set me in a room and brainwashed me for years, I could probably be an extreme liberal or religious, or a neo-con.

Who knows, today, as I sit, without any extreme conditioning or scenarios. I could kill if threatened, I could steal if I were hungry. I could risk my life to save some one under certain conditions.

I'm probably capable of almost anything good or bad really, but that wouldn't absolve me of blame or punishment either. If that is where this is going.







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RE: No one really knows themselves.... - 3/21/2010 12:32:45 AM   
popeye1250


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I think it was pretty cool that I could learn how to play the violin and read music at age 50.
It's a very difficult instrument to learn but I wouldn't quit. I am tenacious when I want something.

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RE: No one really knows themselves.... - 3/21/2010 3:49:33 AM   
NorthernGent


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quote:

ORIGINAL: TheHeretic

I'm both the guy who has stolen food when hungry without a thought to anything but not geting caught, and the fucking moron who runs into a burning house and put out the fire before the fire dept arrived. 



Rich - the fire thing - my Grandad did something similar. Built a business from scratch - millionaire in his day. Also capable of drinking it all away and womanising/generally not doing the right thing by his family - but also capable of saving the lives of strangers in a burning building and risking his life in the process (at 60 years of age).

And where we arrive at the conclusion that we're capable of good and bad deeds given different circumstances then what political system should fit this conclusion on human nature?

And what does all this mean for libertarian and anarchist politics? Where we acknowledge the inherent frailties in human nature then how can we possibly hope to survive in the law of the jungle - without it descending into chaos and decivilisation?

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RE: No one really knows themselves.... - 3/21/2010 5:42:31 AM   
NeedToUseYou


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quote:

ORIGINAL: NorthernGent


quote:

ORIGINAL: TheHeretic

I'm both the guy who has stolen food when hungry without a thought to anything but not geting caught, and the fucking moron who runs into a burning house and put out the fire before the fire dept arrived. 



Rich - the fire thing - my Grandad did something similar. Built a business from scratch - millionaire in his day. Also capable of drinking it all away and womanising/generally not doing the right thing by his family - but also capable of saving the lives of strangers in a burning building and risking his life in the process (at 60 years of age).

And where we arrive at the conclusion that we're capable of good and bad deeds given different circumstances then what political system should fit this conclusion on human nature?

And what does all this mean for libertarian and anarchist politics? Where we acknowledge the inherent frailties in human nature then how can we possibly hope to survive in the law of the jungle - without it descending into chaos and decivilisation?


Don't mean to but in between you and heretic.

The difference is the conditions. Whereas the conditions that I would steal would be survival, others steal for luxury. The conditions I would kill, would be under circumstances of possible greater good, or necessity of defense, to where others kill for money, prestige, or outright stupidity. The difference is the conditions under which it was done.

So, there is no conclusion to be drawn between the fact that most would steal to eat, compared to my cousin for example that was just arrested for stealing gutters (of all things), off a catholic grade school. He didn't need to do that, he has food, and shelter, but he probably wanted some beer or something.

In conclusion it says little...

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RE: No one really knows themselves.... - 3/21/2010 5:47:40 AM   
lusciouslips19


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As far as knowing onesself and ones emotions, I always enliken emotions and self as an onionwithmany layers.  You can know a layer, but there are many hidden things that dont surface until a trigger brings things to the forefront. So you deal with one layer but then that can be peeled away and there is a fresh new layerto look at.

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RE: No one really knows themselves.... - 3/21/2010 6:02:07 AM   
NorthernGent


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quote:

ORIGINAL: NeedToUseYou

Don't mean to but in between you and heretic.

The difference is the conditions. Whereas the conditions that I would steal would be survival, others steal for luxury. The conditions I would kill, would be under circumstances of possible greater good, or necessity of defense, to where others kill for money, prestige, or outright stupidity. The difference is the conditions under which it was done.

So, there is no conclusion to be drawn between the fact that most would steal to eat, compared to my cousin for example that was just arrested for stealing gutters (of all things), off a catholic grade school. He didn't need to do that, he has food, and shelter, but he probably wanted some beer or something.

In conclusion it says little...



I don't think it is a fact that most 'steal to eat'. I would imagine that in the vast majority of burglary and armed robbery cases - it's borne out of your place in the pack and the desire to elevate yourself through foul means (assuming of course you believe stealing is foul means - that's what we consider to be 'civilised' though it's an idea rather than a fact/right).

And where we steal not out of necessity then what does this say about the alternative to protection by the state? The alternative being the state of nature i.e. people having an equal right to everything and the means to take it. Could we possibly co-exist in peace within the state of nature? The evidence suggests we can't - we have been through centuries of religious and civil strife - and the state provided a counter to this - a governing body which everyone must obey in the final analysis - where everyone transfers absolute liberty to a single group. And when we consider what we're capable of withough regulation from a governing body...well.

The evidence suggests we are more civilised under this system than the alternative state of nature. And when considered in the context of D/s - it seems we all agree with this central premise.



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RE: No one really knows themselves.... - 3/21/2010 6:15:19 AM   
Elisabella


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quote:

ORIGINAL: NorthernGent

Discuss.......

P.S. I'm not talking of the time someone went to a supermarket intent on buying cabbage only to have a hideous reawakening of their values and bought cauliflower instead.

As a pointer - what are you capable of in extreme circumstances?


Cold, calculating selfishness. Extreme circumstances teach you to fly or die, and I can't quite say they've made me a better person.

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RE: No one really knows themselves.... - 3/21/2010 6:58:40 AM   
SL4V3M4YB3


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People often blame extreme circumstances for the things they do expecting the rest of us to understand, if they are extreme circumstances then logically we never will understand by virtue of the fact we've not experienced such circumstances. In relation to what NeedsToUseYou said; I can safely say I'll never kill anyone for any amount of money. The simple fact is he is leaving out of the equation the fact that he'll have to live with what he did for the rest of his life; every time you spend that money you'll know where it came from, too much to bear in my view. I don't think the majority could live happily ever after having killed someone for money, you can rationalise it as 'oh he was possibly a bad man' but how do you rationalise the pain you've caused his family and friends?

< Message edited by SL4V3M4YB3 -- 3/21/2010 7:01:39 AM >


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RE: No one really knows themselves.... - 3/21/2010 8:07:04 AM   
LadyEllen


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Environmental nurture must play a part in how we act and react, but in the end it is clear that amongst those exposed to the same background and influences some will behave and react in different ways according to individual personality from what the general cultural expectation might predict. This is observable in day to day life (ie without extreme circumstances applying) - some are leaders and many more are followers, which might be said to be a useful survival mechanism in a social, hierarchical species.

Leaders (who may or may not be actually in a position of leadership) tend to be individual, able to exceed (or subvert) cultural expectation, are possessed of conviction in their own self worth and superior nature (sometimes to the point of psychopathology) and care less than followers about conforming to the group or culture. Followers (who may in some cases achieve positions of actual leadership) tend to be anxious to conform to the group or culture and will rarely exceed or subvert cultural expectation, lacking self belief.

Leaders in leadership can be extremely beneficial for their followers or extremely detrimental to their followers with little middle ground. Followers in leadership are more often than not perceived as weak and prove detrimental to their followers by failing to lead. A leader failing to attract followers often becomes detrimental to his fellows too, declining to conform to the culture of the followers amongst whom he lives. A follower without a leader often becomes detrimental to himself, lacking the vision to progress.

In the context of this discussion, leaders and followers may be equally ignorant of their own self or equally aware of their natures and capacities. When it comes to extreme circumstances though, leaders will always prove to be more capable and effective in their actions and reactions, for good or ill, being more able to deal with things outside normal cultural environment that followers find more difficult.

E

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