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Malkinius -> RE: Stockholm to Lima (12/8/2009 11:53:29 PM)
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Greetings CaringandReal....
quote:
ORIGINAL: CaringandReal
But are the "things which are/can be used to cause SS" actually abuse? And is abuse an essential ingredient required for SS?
I am going to define a couple of terms first so that you understand me. They are mostly my own definitions that I use to describe what I have found and how it can be implemented. The main two are engine or mechanism and tool.
The engine is what drives a process. It is how it actually happens. The engine of sunlight to sugar is, in a short form, photosynthesis. That is the mechanism by which something happens. How you take a memory and store it long term involves neurotransmitters and hormonal and chemical reactions. They are the biological engine of memory.
A tool is something that is used to achieve a result. A hammer achieves the result of a nail holding two boards together. A look is a tool that achieves the transmission of a warning message. A whip is a tool that achieves the activation of pain receptors via striking someone.
These terms are descriptive and value neutral. What you use a tool for and how you use it is what imparts value and meaning to the result. A hammer can build something or destroy something. It is still the same hammer.
Now I can answer your question a bit easier. Some of the tools that are common to SS, abuse, enslavement include separation from others, restrictions of movement and speech, denial of something normally allowed, lack of privacy, punishment for disobedience and domination by force of personality and violence.
quote:
The second statement is what I hear other posters saying. I agree with you about domestic abuse situations. And of course abuse can be a part of bad bdsm relationships (ones in which one partner is not fulfilled or essentially satisfied in some way). But I think LovingPet is talking about either consensual relationships (or ones that start out that way) and also possibly bdsm relationships, whatever their consensuality status, that are "positive" in some manner for both partners. Are you saying that abuse, which I define as something someone truly at their core hates, so much that they would try to escape from it permanently if they could, is not an essential ingredient to producing SS?
When you have a consensual relationship for the usage of, for example, the tools listed above, you do not have abuse. You will also not produce SS. The latter is because you have a level of self-reinforcement that is mostly absent in SS but common in IE. You do get it somewhat in abuse situations. That is an odd hybrid between the two.
There are many cases where a SS victim is allowed to move freely and even trusted to not run or fight back after time. Patty Hurst for example. In many of the kidnap and hold for years cases, the victim has at times been allowed to do things on their own without supervision and they could have run but did not. In a consensual IE situation, the slave self-reinforces that she wants to be where she is because she chose to be there and barring an otherwise abusive situation will stay. They often will stay even if it turns abusive which in BDSM can and sometimes does happen as it does in marriages and mundane relationships. You will just have to trust me that a person's mind can be changed to the point where they don't want to leave the situation they are in even tho they don't want to be there.
Does this help?
Be well....
Malkinius
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