Petitioning

Petitioning (Full Version)

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kubens -> Petitioning (6/23/2009 5:55:49 PM)
Recently my wonderful Domme has purchased a very nice collar for me. She says that if i wish to wear it--which of course i do--i'll have to petition Her for the honor. I've been researching the issue, and haven't had much luck find good information on it. And so i'd like to hear from folks in the CM community on this whole issue. What does it entail? How does it differ from contracts? Etc. Any help would be most appreciated, whether posted here or if you can direct me to other sources--websites, etc. Thanks, kubens

dreamerdreaming -> RE: Petitioning (6/23/2009 6:32:04 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: kubens Recently my wonderful Domme has purchased a very nice collar for me. She says that if i wish to wear it--which of course i do--i'll have to petition Her for the honor. I've been researching the issue, and haven't had much luck find good information on it. And so i'd like to hear from folks in the CM community on this whole issue. What does it entail? How does it differ from contracts? Etc. Any help would be most appreciated, whether posted here or if you can direct me to other sources--websites, etc. Thanks, kubens Sounds like she wants you to beg her for it. But to get a really helpful answer, you'd hafta ask HER exactly what she has in mind. Does she want you to get down on your knees and beg for it? Write a 1,000 page treatise? How the hell are we supposed to know? If you two have such sucky communication to begin with, I wouldn't recommend you ask for her collar at this time.

NihilusZero -> RE: Petitioning (6/23/2009 6:32:30 PM)
It sounds like she just wants you to beg for it. Aside from that I have no idea what she would have meant by "petition" and, if she hasn't divulged that information to you, then that complicates things. She's interested enough to have bought you the collar...yet appears to want one final testament of your devotion. You would know best what that may entail long before the rest of us divine it from mere guessing.

RedMagic1 -> RE: Petitioning (6/23/2009 6:36:57 PM)
Does she want you to ask her to marry you?

sweetsub1957 -> RE: Petitioning (6/23/2009 6:58:31 PM)
Is She wanting you to beg the collar from Her, wanting you to profess your love & devotion to Her? If Sir said that to me, that's what I'd do.

kubens -> RE: Petitioning (6/23/2009 7:05:59 PM)
Dreamerdreaming, I'm simply trying to get some healthy discussion about petitioning, what it is, what it means etc. If you choose to think our communcation is "sucky"-- whatver that means, so be it. If you have any good advice I'd like to hear it, if not, please leave the thread for those who do.

NihilusZero -> RE: Petitioning (6/23/2009 7:14:15 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: kubens Dreamerdreaming, I'm simply trying to get some healthy discussion about petitioning, what it is, what it means etc. If you choose to think our communcation is "sucky"-- whatver that means, so be it. If you have any good advice I'd like to hear it, if not, please leave the thread for those who do. You're working under the presumption that "petitioning" is a hotword for a specific set or protocols in BDSM. It isn't (to my knowledge). And, even if it was, it's likely not universally applicable. Seriously...if I come in here I lay out this detailed list of acts that qualifies as "official petitioning" and you do it...and it's not what she wanted, who's going to be to blame? Does she espouse beliefs relating to spirituality, karma, magic(k) and/or fate?

SmokingGun82 -> RE: Petitioning (6/23/2009 7:19:24 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: kubens If you choose to think our communcation is "sucky"-- whatver that means, so be it. He means it sucks. As in, it is not good. Bad. Inefficient. Unacceptable. Consult a thesaurus for more options. In short, if you don't know, and can't just ask her, then you're starting from a shitty spot. Good luck with that. quote: ORIGINAL: kubens If you have any good advice I'd like to hear it, if not, please leave the thread for those who do. My advice is ask whoever wants the petitioning done to explain. When I hear petition I think of signatures and fruitless attempts to save TV shows. She might have another opinion.

kubens -> RE: Petitioning (6/23/2009 7:25:52 PM)
Ok, apparently I made a mistake trying to get info here. This is supposed to be 'only' about petitioning, not rash judgements about the quality of communication between my Domme and I. The fact is we have a very healthy relationship, and I see know reason for people here to jump to the conclusion that we don't have good comminucation.

SmokingGun82 -> RE: Petitioning (6/23/2009 7:28:58 PM)
You're asking about a term that isn't commonly used, and want to know what one specific person wants it to mean. Ask them. No one else can answer that question. Or, you can try writing her name in every library book in one section. That would certainly prove devotion, and she'd be forced to accept you forever and ever.

dreamerdreaming -> RE: Petitioning (6/23/2009 7:28:59 PM)
Perhaps I'm overly snarky tonight. My bad. I seriously gave you my best advice: 1) Ask her! 2) Hold off on the whole collar thing until you two have better communication. The two of you having such basic trouble with communication doesn't bode well for your future together. If sugar coating would make my post more palatable for you, I'm sorry. I'm just not up for that. Her being so vague in her requirements about something that is presumeably very important to her (again I can only guess- you'd hafta ask her what it means to her).... and you asking us for clarification (about something that is evidently very important to you) instead of asking her- you don't see big trouble on the horizon?

susie -> RE: Petitioning (6/23/2009 7:28:59 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: kubens Ok, apparently I made a mistake trying to get info here. This is supposed to be 'only' about petitioning, not rash judgements about the quality of communication between my Domme and I. The fact is we have a very healthy relationship, and I see know reason for people here to jump to the conclusion that we don't have good comminucation. If you have such good communication why have you not asked her what she means by petitioning. She is the only one that can tell you. It is certainly not a term I have ever come across as a bdsm term.

NihilusZero -> RE: Petitioning (6/23/2009 7:34:44 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: kubens Ok, apparently I made a mistake trying to get info here. This is supposed to be 'only' about petitioning, not rash judgements about the quality of communication between my Domme and I. The fact is we have a very healthy relationship, and I see know reason for people here to jump to the conclusion that we don't have good comminucation. Stop for a moment to take in the fact that these comments are not being made as personal attacks. The reason communication is being brought up is because if you knew what "petitioning" meant to her, you wouldn't need to ask the question. The two most likely answers are the following: a) She wants you to beg. A lot. Via the words and actions that you (as a good sub) should know please her most. b) She wants you to guess (and guess right) a semi-specific response that she's looking for, which she hasn't told you about because she's hoping that you magically divining the correct answer will be metaphysical proof that you are the karmic/fateful one worthy of being kept. On the bright side, your ability to make the most of either of these situations will be aided by how attentive you have been to her quirks/likes/dislikes...something I'd hope you've been quite apt at.

danielh -> RE: Petitioning (6/23/2009 7:42:23 PM)
From Wipipedia via Google... not that I'd take it to the bank over the opinions here, but obviously something that's out there, so I wouldn't come down too hard here over the term. "Petition The petition acts in the same manner as a cover letter for a résumé. In a petition a submissive will make their plea to the Dominant and may outline why they are seeking to be in service to the Dominant. Generally not used with a relationship that existed prior to the contract, however, for a submissive who is in search of a Dominant, this feature helps to show professionalism and attention to detail. The petition should go into detail of your request, why you wish to be in service, your goals, and why you've chosen this Dominant specifically." If you need a dictionary, somethings missing here. Just a word... funky... but a word. You want to be there, just go with it, and make her happy dude (or else!).

CatdeMedici -> RE: Petitioning (6/23/2009 7:47:27 PM)
No No No---asking a question like this of strangers here is like petitioning the fans at Yankee stadium on how to propose. Dude, She is Your Mistress, this isn't rocket science, She is a woman in Domina's clothing---this has to be from YOUR heart, YOUR soul, YOUR originality, you know Her, think about it and I guarantee you will know what to say and know what to do. <hint: don't mention your talented tongue, your need for chastity, your acquiescence to a strapon--do mention your desire to serve in the face of the fires of hell and you might get Her attention>

DarkSteven -> RE: Petitioning (6/23/2009 8:02:02 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: CatdeMedici Dude, She is Your Mistress, this isn't rocket science, She is a woman in Domina's clothing---this has to be from YOUR heart, YOUR soul, YOUR originality, you know Her, think about it and I guarantee you will know what to say and know what to do. Bingo. If she cares enough about you to collar you, she knows your soul. She wants you to pour out your soul to her. Go do it!!!

RedMagic1 -> RE: Petitioning (6/23/2009 8:10:59 PM)
For what it's worth, I've heard femdoms use the term "petitioner" to describe a sub male who is requesting a relationship. It might be a term local to the San Francisco Bay Area. My sense of how it was used was in a new-person context, like a first meet or a job interview. I've never heard it used to describe a more serious relationship. A phrase like, "Beg for my Master/Mistress's collar," is one I've heard to request the start of a serious relationship, especially of slavehood. kubens, I strongly agree with dreamerdreaming, and SmokingGun... and everyone else who agrees with the two of them![;)] I also noticed that you took umbrage at the comments you didn't like, but didn't address my own question at all. So yeah. Your communication skills on this message board ain't so great. Maybe they don't completely rock in real life either. How about: "May I ask what you mean by petition, Mistress?"

MasterFireMaam -> RE: Petitioning (6/23/2009 8:42:11 PM)
A petition is usually a request for something. It sometimes includes all the conditions that go along with the request but it doesn't have to. It also sometimes includes all the 'promises' that come with the request, but doesn't have to. Often, a petition is the subs/slaves side of a contract. Master Fire

MakeMeSmile4U -> RE: Petitioning (6/23/2009 9:48:31 PM)
Kubens, My Dominant also requested a petition from me before he would take our relationship out of 'vanilla' mode. I didnt have a clue as to what he wanted and thought about giving him a short note that said "Pick me, pick meeee!!!" but I knew that would fly, so I did some research.... came up with crap, then asked him directly what he wanted. All he really said was he wanted something in writing that told him why I wanted to be his sub. Specifically, what I wanted out of the relationship and what I thought I could bring into the relationship. If you would like, send me a Cmail and I will send you the format I used, but basically I wrote it like a personal history/resume. The first half was very clinical. I started with a brief summary of my childhood (good relationship with both parents and siblings) medical history of things that are pertinent (like my 2 herniated disks..he needs to know about that so I dont end up in any positions to worsen that condition). The second half was more personal... I explained why I thought he was the perfect Dom for me and why I thought I could learn to be a fantastic submissive for him. I told him all my wants and desires, those that were personal and those that included him. He accepted :) I would venture to say your Domme just wants to hear whats in your heart, as mine did. Good Luck!!!

beargonewild -> RE: Petitioning (6/24/2009 10:55:49 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: kubens Ok, apparently I made a mistake trying to get info here. This is supposed to be 'only' about petitioning, not rash judgements about the quality of communication between my Domme and I. The fact is we have a very healthy relationship, and I see know reason for people here to jump to the conclusion that we don't have good comminucation. Ok don't get your undies in a knot, many are just trying to get you to be more clear and specific about what you are asking based on the little blurb you wrote. It is possible she wants to see what lengths you will go to in order to wear her collar, nothing more. The suggestion of going back and specifically asking her "What she means by petition" is sound as you'll know exactly what she requires of you. Another suggestion is to sit down and write 2-3 pages expressing why you so want/need/crave/desire to wear that collar. I am only guessing here but it sounds like she wants to see what lengths you will go to beg for that collar being placed around your neck.

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