RE: Petitioning (Full Version)

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leadership527 -> RE: Petitioning (6/24/2009 11:07:14 AM)

kubens:

I don't know if this helps or not, but Carol and I were married for quite some time before the collaring. When she brought up the idea, my immediate thought was that she was kidding. So I told her, "If you go buy a collar, IN PERSON, and bring it to me, I'll collar you." Note that she's pretty shy and the act of doing so was going to be difficult for her. All I really wanted to know was that she was serious so I set a speed bump in her path.

ymmv




kubens -> RE: Petitioning (6/24/2009 1:05:02 PM)

MakeMeSmile4U,

Thanks for your response!!

Kubens




kubens -> RE: Petitioning (6/24/2009 1:12:06 PM)

The truth is, that Domina simply wanted me to go through the process of research the topic of Petitioning myself to learn about it on my own.  In other words She doesn't want to "spoon feed" me on this issue.  I admit, now that I look back, that I was too vague in my original post.  Yes, I assumed that the term 'petitioning' is common in the BDSM community, I was wrong--my bad.  But I also feel that some people were reading too much in to my post by assuming we communication issue.  Nevertheless, I learned something here that I believe will help me prepare to 'petition for Her collar.'

Sincerely,
kubens




MstrPBK -> RE: Petitioning (6/24/2009 1:45:49 PM)

(very interesting smile on my face) PLEASE NOTE: My use of the term Dominate infers Master or Mistress, or other title which suggests the person whom would be in control of the relationship after the acquisition process was complete.

From my view the Process of Petitioning is a "formal request" to make oneself available to serve the Dominate person (male or female). Depending on the Dominate it can be as simple as asking and acknowledging that your ready to seriously serve them on a long term basis or it could be full scale document outlining what your wiling to offer the Dominate person; what your experiences has been; a formal statement within it indicating you offer your self for full-time service; and other very specific information detailing WHO you are as a slave. From my view the document ought to answer 90% of the dominates questions about you. Under exceptionally rare cases is this document a first meeting document. In most cases the document is a start of a formal evaluation process for the dominate person to go from. Collaring occurs later.

To turn tables on the Petition Process I, as a Master, developed my own document which I call "the Conventions". This document does almost the something to describe myself as a Master to the interested slave.

NOT to burst bubbles or even balloons ... in the 18 years I have searched "for my next slave" I have only seen two (2) spontaneous submissions of Petitions for Service from slaves. This is a forgotten process that I would welcome the return of within the community as a Master.

MstrPBK
ST. Paul, MN USA




penitentialarts -> RE: Petitioning (6/24/2009 11:07:33 PM)

Ask her to explain what she wants in more detail.

"Petitioning" for a collar generally means that the dominant wants you to make a formal request of some kind.  I haven't heard the term used as much in the last several years as I did in the past. 

Overall, I have seen it used in the gay male Leather community more than other subsections of our kink, and the concept goes back for several decades there.  Some dominants prefer submissives to approach them and ask to play or to petition for collars.  Some prefer to do the opposite.

My personal preference is for potential female submissives to approach me, and to ask for a collar when that time comes (though not in a formal way).  It shows me that they are interested enough in me to buck the general reticence that so many women in the U.S. have towards being up-front about their interests/desires.  That isn't to say that I never take the role of "pursuer."  However, I am extremely impressed by submissive women (or, frankly, women in general) who are gutsy enough to take the risk of rejection, like men do.

- Jesse




ElectraGlide -> RE: Petitioning (6/24/2009 11:26:50 PM)

Petitioning could simply mean Negotiation. Its time to lay it on the line, she wants to hear how you will serve her. I hope you negotiate what you want out of the relationship. I believe all Submissives should have a say in what they are seeking in the relationship, weather the Dominant likes it or not.




ZenDragoness -> RE: Petitioning (6/24/2009 11:57:02 PM)

I am not sure that she really meant petition. A petition as far as i know would be something public. The essence of a petition is to raise awareness to a topic to get something changed.

For me a petition would have be to me to her in public, maybe a club the two of you visit? and would include begging, but mostly the reasons why you are want to be collared by her, what makes she special and your relationship.


Maybe she just used a wrong word, wanted to overspecial the occasion and choose petition.




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