Trashiness?

Trashiness? (Full Version)

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SomethingCatchy -> Trashiness? (5/4/2009 7:53:40 PM)
Story - You meet a person online, maybe from our dear ole' CM. You agree to meet in a public place, things go well, and you both agree to meet again. After a few 'dates' you both feel comfortable enough to visit each others homes. You go over to theirs one night, maybe for dinner and a movie, but when you walk through the door BAM. Trash everywhere. You may or may not smell questionable cat substances and the couch isn't something you'd like to sit on without a rubber sheet. What would you do? How important is it to you that someone you're interested in has a clean house? Could you overlook clutter? What about trash but without the stink? What sort of 'limits' do you have on the way a person keeps his or her house? I met someone like this from a local group. We're still friends (good friends actually) but he knows I refuse to visit his apartment. He has since learned to clean up after himself, but until he moves somewhere where cat isn't permeated into the carpet, I'm keeping it to public venues (not to mention we live in different states now). note - this is brought up after seeing a picture on the main page of a submissive male with trash piled up behind him and what looks to be a pile of dirty white underwear.

breatheasone -> RE: Trashiness? (5/4/2009 7:58:43 PM)
*MUST BITE TONGUE, CAN'T COMMENT ON THIS THREAD EVEN THOUGH I R-E-A-L-L-Y WANT TO!!*[X(][X(][X(]

SailingBum -> RE: Trashiness? (5/4/2009 8:08:21 PM)
ehhh I aint hanging out with someone whos house smells like a barn.. And I damn sure aint doing the deed with some barn yard creature. BadOne

dreamerdreaming -> RE: Trashiness? (5/4/2009 8:14:08 PM)
[sm=hellno.gif][sm=hardlimit.gif][sm=afraid.gif]

TaoWoman -> RE: Trashiness? (5/4/2009 8:41:51 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: SomethingCatchy What would you do? *Leave* How important is it to you that someone you're interested in has a clean house? *Very, particularly if they are on the Dominant side of the kneel* Could you overlook clutter? *Clutter, yes only for as long as it took to get it organized...Trash, no. Filth, no* What about trash but without the stink? No What sort of 'limits' do you have on the way a person keeps his or her house? *It is a reflection of themselves and their habits. Humble is fine, filthy and trashy - absolutely no excuse* quote: note - this is brought up after seeing a picture on the main page of a submissive male with trash piled up behind him and what looks to be a pile of dirty white underwear. *These type photos save alot of time as they speak a thousand words~*

DavanKael -> RE: Trashiness? (5/4/2009 10:28:33 PM)
I'll proudly admit to having 6 cats who think that the litter pan is highly optional (Okay, I'm proud that the kitties and my other pets are part of my family. The litter pan thing, I tolerate). I will cop, as well, to lots and lots of carpet cleaning. I prefer to keep my house in a pristine fashion. My mindset and motivation have impacts on that. If I am having guests, I believe it's disrespectful not to clean up for them. And, lol, I know the sort of photos that you're speaking of...I always find those as well as the ones where the room looks just sort of spartan and thrown-together where you see electrical cords and such rather off-putting. 'Course, if I care about a person, we can work together on habitat. Davan

sweetnurseBBW -> RE: Trashiness? (5/4/2009 10:39:09 PM)
I don't expect someones home to be immaculate but it should be kept up. If someone cannot take the time to pick up trash and clean up after their animals that just says lazy to me and I don't want to be a part of it. There is a difference between being lived in and just nasty.

AlexandraLynch -> RE: Trashiness? (5/4/2009 10:46:00 PM)
I think there can be reasons, but just as we were discussing that part of what a caring dom might help a sub with would be health issues, part of what a caring dom might help a sub with might be learning how to keep and maintain a clean and uncluttered enviroment. I mean, if you grow up in clutter, then you don't know how not to live in clutter til someone teaches you. I don't think anyone's born knowing that baseboards just have to be scrubbed down with an old toothbrush once a year, or how to work out a cleaning schedule so that everything stays acceptable. I had family that taught me, and though things slacked when I got hurt, once I got some level of recovery back that changed rapidly (Hell is sitting with a broken foot staring at a trash can needing emptied). And even now sometimes I will tell my girl that what we're doing Saturday afternoon is not play; I've got a walk-in closet that needs cleaning out, and if there are two people doing it, we can whip that sucker into shape fast and neither of us will be too exhausted to play that night. Works for me. (grin)

MsDDom -> RE: Trashiness? (5/4/2009 10:48:43 PM)
quote: What would you do? RUN

LyraLaLaurie -> RE: Trashiness? (5/4/2009 10:52:46 PM)
Very very hard limit...after living with someone who left raw chicken out for days and thought it was normal....welllll, no one deserves an experience like that!

CarrieO -> RE: Trashiness? (5/4/2009 11:28:35 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: SomethingCatchy Story - You meet a person online, maybe from our dear ole' CM. You agree to meet in a public place, things go well, and you both agree to meet again. After a few 'dates' you both feel comfortable enough to visit each others homes. You go over to theirs one night, maybe for dinner and a movie, but when you walk through the door BAM. Trash everywhere. You may or may not smell questionable cat substances and the couch isn't something you'd like to sit on without a rubber sheet. What would you do? Say thank you but no thank you. How important is it to you that someone you're interested in has a clean house? Very important. Could you overlook clutter? If you aren't willing to clean up, I have a very hard time overlooking it. If you have a clutter issue, ie pack rat, get help. What about trash but without the stink? See above answers. What sort of 'limits' do you have on the way a person keeps his or her house? This is a hard limit for me. I understand there can be extenuating circumstances behind every situation but please understand, in my opinion, piles of trash and clutter are a reflection of who you are and where your priorities lie. I met someone like this from a local group. We're still friends (good friends actually) but he knows I refuse to visit his apartment. He has since learned to clean up after himself, but until he moves somewhere where cat isn't permeated into the carpet, I'm keeping it to public venues (not to mention we live in different states now). Been there, done that. note - this is brought up after seeing a picture on the main page of a submissive male with trash piled up behind him and what looks to be a pile of dirty white underwear. I would ask them what was in the background of their photo if I was to be contacted by such a person. I grew up with parents that were pack rats, not in a serious illness sort of way but enough to make me a very neat person. I've been with men who just need a bit of help in the organizing department( which I'm very good at and have no problem helping them with), and I've known those who, in my opinion, are beyond help, surrounded by mounds of garbage and cans. Piles of trash and filth are as hard a limit for me as any bdsm limit. I have 3 cats in a very small cottage, I make the time to keep my living space clean and "smelly cat" odor-free...I expect the same from anyone I'm involved with. Does this make me judgemental...damn right it does, in regards to person space...chaos breeds chaos.

Scheherazade -> RE: Trashiness? (5/5/2009 12:21:47 AM)
Saw this post and it made me think of the first time I met daddy and then another time, went to his place. His 15 yr old car was pristine, his house is beautiful, totally organized and immaculate. I was so impressed as I couldn't even tell there was a cat living there. If I am going to move in and serve daddy when I am out of school and taking care of our place and our lives, it will be a breeze.

GYPZYQUEEN -> RE: Trashiness? (5/5/2009 12:48:35 AM)
It sounded like he knew you were coming but there was still filth and stench.. so not only daily..monthly...maybe yearly but also a " don't give a shit" ........wait maybe there was shit clutter and dust maybe stench..filth NO WAY... see below.. UNACCEPTABLE..my first thought would be what is in his pants.?.underwear?..ass crack?..on is hands?...in the food?..his mouth?.. on his toys?...bedding?ewwwwwwwwwww ..........ON ME filthy home = UNCARING..disorganized person... (barring illness...depression...disabilty etc and still there is help here) *I had 15 cats in my house yep and hired a cleaner to come 2+ times a week just for cat cleanup..hair removal...deoderization so that everyone could have a quality life..* I had a friend whose house was so filthy we had to stop visiting..MY husband refused to go to the washroom there and had to hold it making visits short. When you go in a bathroom and there is bloody tampons on the floor being used by cats to play and kid shit all over;;;welllllll and when she came to our house the filth came along... she left shit stains on my couch.....had to cut the friendship off. ..........it was too shitty.......[X(] GQ

LaTigresse -> RE: Trashiness? (5/5/2009 4:09:50 AM)
I may have been born poor white trash but I don't have to live like it. That being said, I've spent the last week and a half either at work or working here on the farm, outside. The inside of my house reflects that. The spare bedroom aka my closet, has clean clothes and some clean winter bedding piled on the bed, waiting to be put away. The dining table has a scanner and a bunch of photo equipment and unopened mail piled on it. The kitchen sink has yesterday's dishes piled in it that will have to wait until tonight to be washed. Oh, and Generic Dude hasn't dusted in at least a month, though he did clean the floors on Saturday. And the bathroom is right there on the edge of needing a good scrubbing. But certainly not even close to gross. I get kind of weirded out about dirty kitchens and bathrooms. Messy, on a temporary basis, I can handle. Only so many hours in the day and anytime after 8pm is NOT for cleaning house......not for me. I've already been up and outside for an hour this morning and will be off to work in the next. Not home until about 7 tonight and will be immediately changed and outside working with horses. Somehow the dishes will get done because I am weird like that, but anything else can wait. What gets done in the evenings gets done, otherwise it waits until the weekend. If that's too trashy for some potential slave, they are certainly welcome to try and pass my acceptance process to move in and help change things! Another set of hands is always welcome around here.

HalloweenWhite -> RE: Trashiness? (5/5/2009 4:21:58 AM)
To expect a clean home is very normal, so is the absense of smells;other than maybe room fresheners,food or coffee, etc. If you can smell animal then there are bigger issues like health to thibk about-people who have allergies can be ill because of things like dog or cat hair, and asthma can be realy dangerous-here in the U.K an actress named Charlotte Coleman died a few years ago after having an asthma attack. She was only 33.But thats notthe only thing they....ahem.....deposit and that can cause big health problems too. Some people don't tidy up out of laziness, others don't seem capable-I lived below someone like that, now I live below their brother and his girlfriend who didn't notice they hadn't turned off the water properly when they disconnected their washing machine......

CatdeMedici -> RE: Trashiness? (5/5/2009 4:23:10 AM)
If you don't respect your surroundings you won't respect Mine--nope I'm a cleaniness snob--doesn't have to be pristine, but everything has a place and everything should be in its place. Its My eccentricity, if the house is clean and neat, I feel I can go off and do the myriad of other things life holds in store.

RavenMuse -> RE: Trashiness? (5/5/2009 4:46:08 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: sweetnurseBBW I don't expect someones home to be immaculate but it should be kept up. If someone cannot take the time to pick up trash and clean up after their animals that just says lazy to me and I don't want to be a part of it. There is a difference between being lived in and just nasty. Thats a ditto on what she said! At that point... I'm gone, hasta la vista

subtlebutterfly -> RE: Trashiness? (5/5/2009 4:46:22 AM)
I admit it, right now mine's...well..frankly "disgusting" ..it needs a bit of vacuuming..and dusting and there're books papers folders EVERYWHERE literally..but if I would pile a few things up it wouldn't look too bad a person could come in n sit somewhere without being grossed out...so yea I expect..a NEAT house..not polished tip-top from top to bottom but neat..but heck sometimes you just don't have the time. I usually prefer it clean heck shiny is awesome but as long as it's neat and hygienic I'm all good. I don't mind having to move a thing or two..or three out of my way to find a seat or having to use my way-too-awesome gymnastic abilities to get somewhere lol but non-hygienic is a HARD limit! If a persons home's diiiisgusting...I honestly don't expect themselves to be..any..less..disgusting on a daily basis (then I'm not talking about like..when they've had an hour or 2 to get themselves ready on a date)

windchymes -> RE: Trashiness? (5/5/2009 5:00:23 AM)
Don't judge a person too quickly, though, there are exceptions....[8\|] My dog LOVES to get into the trash. And I try to remember to shut the laundry room door, where I keep the kitchen trash until I can take it out. But yesterday, I forgot....and the bag I had put the dirty cat litter and old food from the fridge clean-out into was in there....and I was running late for work and didn't take it out OR shut the door.... [:(] It was ugly. Another time, she got into the bathroom trash, with the proverbial used tampon applicators and maxi-pads. And, my sister and her husband were here helping me install the new tv and he went upstairs to get tools I had left in my bedroom (I had just moved). Good thing he's like family, I would have actually died from mortification, not just thrown up....

slaveluci -> RE: Trashiness? (5/5/2009 5:32:12 AM)
<<<<<<<<"Poor white trash" who knows how keep a nice house[;)] Poor is not a synonym for trashy or dirty. No matter how poor one is, there's no excuse for filth. luci

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