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Frenzy - 3/9/2009 7:01:06 AM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline 		I just came from another thread titled "Sub Frenzy."  As I was replying to the thread, a question came to My mind.

Why do we call it "sub" frenzy?  Wouldn't "bottom" frenzy be more appropriate?  Isn't the whole concept based on being driven to bottom during play, rather than to actually submit?

Your thoughts are welcome. 


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RE: Frenzy - 3/9/2009 7:05:07 AM   
Aileen1968


Posts: 6062
Joined: 12/12/2007
From: I miss Shore, New Jersey
Status: offline 		No. For me it's an actual craving for the mental aspects of submitting to him along with all of the physical. It's not just bottoming it's hearing things like "good girl"

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RE: Frenzy - 3/9/2009 7:19:19 AM   
CatdeMedici


Posts: 2257
Joined: 10/20/2008
Status: offline 		I think its called that because "extreme sports endorphin rush and adrenaline overload" doesn't sound too sexy.

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RE: Frenzy - 3/9/2009 7:21:44 AM   
mc1234


Posts: 683
Joined: 10/4/2008
Status: offline 		Could be ... but I also think it's a craving to belong, to be owned, to feel 'his' .. even if the person doesn't know who the 'his' is yet!  

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RE: Frenzy - 3/9/2009 7:30:17 AM   
feydeplume


Posts: 935
Joined: 12/24/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: CatdeMedici
"extreme sports endorphin rush and adrenaline overload" doesn't sound too sexy.


It sounds sexy and accurate to me. I would guess that it is called sub frenzy in a d/s based arena because here we use the labels sub and Dom more than Top and Bottom. HOW people get the endorphin rush, the context of the intensity, can and is an identifying factor in their sexuality.

That said, I think we throw the term around way too much and use it to mean anything from "bored" to actual dangerous risk-taking behaviors that are derailing the person's life. And I firmly believe in D or Top
frenzy' as well and that it can mean anything from bored to desperately acting out to get their mental and physical fix or hit or other term for dose of drug of choice.



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RE: Frenzy - 3/9/2009 7:39:34 AM   
everhope


Posts: 2179
Joined: 8/19/2007
Status: offline 		whenever i felt sub frenzy it was about submitting, feeling owned and a sense of belonging not so much about the play. although in the beginning, i had moments that i felt a frenzy to experience different kinds of play.


may we all find our bliss.

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RE: Frenzy - 3/9/2009 8:20:59 AM   
Andalusite


Posts: 2492
Joined: 1/25/2009
Status: offline 		Umm, I thought that endorphin buzz is commonly referred to as "subspace," though I agree it can be associated with bottoming, or the physical aspects of submitting. "Sub frenzy" is more of a "I want a Dom/me, take me now, I'm going to be completely indiscriminate in my decision making and abandon all common sense." Dom/mes do the equivalent too, for that matter, but that doesn't get discussed here much (except for as complaints about HNGs with spammy e-mails).

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RE: Frenzy - 3/9/2009 8:47:26 AM   
Aileen1968


Posts: 6062
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From: I miss Shore, New Jersey
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Andalusite

Umm, I thought that endorphin buzz is commonly referred to as "subspace,"


Subspace, to me, tends to not be an endorphin rush, but rather a subdued, quiet mental headspace.

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RE: Frenzy - 3/9/2009 11:57:16 AM   
AquaticSub


Posts: 14867
Joined: 12/27/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

I just came from another thread titled "Sub Frenzy."  As I was replying to the thread, a question came to My mind.

Why do we call it "sub" frenzy?  Wouldn't "bottom" frenzy be more appropriate?  Isn't the whole concept based on being driven to bottom during play, rather than to actually submit?

Your thoughts are welcome. 



Not in my experience. The people I've dealt with in sub frenzy very much wanted to serve. Yes they wanted to play to but it was more like watching the stereotypical woman who wants to get married so badly that she doesn't care who she marries.

I'd say it was more fifty-fifty really.

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RE: Frenzy - 3/9/2009 12:03:48 PM   
CallaFirestormBW


Posts: 3651
Joined: 6/29/2008
Status: offline 		The cases of "frenzy" that I've encountered haven't come from bottoms wanting to be played... they've come from people who were looking, usually, for their Knight in Shining Armor or the equivalent. They wanted to be owned so badly... to belong to someone so badly... they were willing to ignore common sense, safety, and even their own gut, just to be in that person's life and give themselves and their lives up to hir.

I've encountered a lot of bottoms who are eager to be played... but most of them are happy to go to a play party and mix it up. Frenzy is, in my experience, on an entirely different level.


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RE: Frenzy - 3/9/2009 12:07:58 PM   
Andalusite


Posts: 2492
Joined: 1/25/2009
Status: offline 		Aileen, I agree there are a lot of different forms of subspace, and how I feel when I am actually submitting to someone is very different from when I am just bottoming and feeling the endorphin rush. That's just how I've usually seen the term used here and on the other site I post at.

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RE: Frenzy - 3/9/2009 12:19:43 PM   
CreativeDominant


Posts: 11032
Joined: 3/11/2006
Status: offline 		Speaking as a dominant, I've too seen sub-frenzy.  I've also seen the Dom/me frenzy, as someone termed it.  I think of it as has been described here...that sense of wanting to belong to/own someone carried to the extreme.  With one submissive friend of mine, it was carried to the point of constantly searching for dominants that she could move into a 24/7 living situation as soon as possible while keeping another dominant on a string (back-up, stroking of the ego?) while searching still further for that more perfect dominant. 

Tlhe state seems to be encouraged by those dominants/submissives who like to rush things.  While I agree that there are variances in the getting to know you stage in terms of length of time, those things you seek can be found in any number of people and it takes time to sift through folks if you are looking for something that might have a chance of lasting rather than just the uplift provided by being able to say "I've got mine" within a week of meeting someone.

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RE: Frenzy - 3/9/2009 1:50:39 PM   
Mercnbeth


Posts: 11766
Status: offline
quote:

...Why do we call it "sub" frenzy?  Wouldn't "bottom" frenzy be more appropriate?  Isn't the whole concept based on being driven to bottom during play, rather than to actually submit?

Your thoughts are welcome... 

 
this slave wonders similar things...although she has never seen sub-frenzy or Dom/me frenzy.
 
this slave believes that folks make choices that are not too bright, behave immaturely and/or enthusiastically...even when they aren't confronted with submissiveness/bottoming/dominance/topping as a new feeling/sensation/concept in their repetoire.
 
why the necessity for a special condition, labelled "sub-frenzy" or "Dom/me-frenzy", that one may or may not become mysteriously affected by, to be created in the first place?

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RE: Frenzy - 3/9/2009 2:44:52 PM   
SassySarijane


Posts: 1558
Joined: 12/20/2007
From: KC Area Missouri
Status: offline 		The frenzy doesn't just hit subs or bottoms. Tops and doms get it too. We hear about sub frenzy all the time, different things they have done when new and wanting to experience it all right now, all the submitting all the playing, all of it. We hear about the new dominants much less, but it happens just the same and probably more than many think. I think it should just be left at frenzy myself rather than sub or bottom or top or dom frenzy.

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RE: Frenzy - 3/9/2009 2:52:40 PM   
TreasureKY


Posts: 3032
Joined: 4/10/2007
From: Kentucky
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: CreativeDominant

... I've also seen the Dom/me frenzy, as someone termed it. 


I once called it "Dom Discombobulation".  It might not be a perfect description, but I've always been a fan of aliteration. 

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RE: Frenzy - 3/9/2009 3:09:58 PM   
Evility


Posts: 915
Joined: 12/19/2007
Status: offline 		I agree with you on the distinction between bottoming and submission but I think I have seen a pretty fair amount of both over the years. There are just as many who get carried away in their own desires to submit to Master as they do in wanting to bottom to someone. And as someone mentioned, this isn't exclusive to the submissive or bottoms communities. Tops and dominants can also show signs of frenzy activity. It seems to me that this is usually more prevalent among folks who are newer to all of this. With some time and experience the situation settles a bit.





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RE: Frenzy - 3/9/2009 4:52:05 PM   
lovingpet


Posts: 4270
Joined: 6/19/2005
Status: offline 		I have to say, at that point, it was really about both.  I wanted to play...well, duh!  LOL  I had received just enough sensations to know I wanted more and heavier.  There wasn't much I wouldn't do to get to play.  Somehow, I still managed to make a careful choice in partners.  It wasn't easy because boy did I ever want to play!

I also wanted so much more than just play.  In all honesty, at least at some level, I could have played without going out looking for someone specific with whom to play.  Any warm body with the proper tools and who was not a nutjob would do.  Actually, bonus points for a well presented nutjob, but still!  LOL  I wanted connection.  I wanted my life and choices in another's hands (more than I have been able to realistically acheive).  I wanted to taste that freedom in bondage thing.  I wanted to serve someone for their pleasure and for that reason alone. 

It was something that was a bit harder to control because play can only happen in certain limited situations.  I could serve most anyone at any time to any level.  It caused problems.  I either was annoying my husband, catering to my kids, or overloading my schedule with various other commitments.  I was serving whether someone was interested in letting me or not.  It was the "natural" part so to speak.  For me, play is an extension of my natural inclination.  It came out whether it was good for me or not.  Within a relationship, I find I am more able to meet a balance in other areas of life because I have my place to serve on that very basic level.  There is an appropriate outlet instead of ones that are so destructive.  I can say no more readily.  I can enforce my personal boundaries and rules with family and friends better.  Do I still naturally care for and serve others in my life?  Yes.  I do it with a bit more direction and less focus on need fulfillment.

I am still very much in that phase of wanting to try anything and everything now now now.  I am.  That is the exciting part of exploring with someone new (I hope anyway).  I think I would try most anything once at this point.  I will narrow down more clearly what I enjoy most at a later date.  Right now, I want to serve someone who understands my need to do so and play with all the fun toys, gadgets and stuff as soon as we can get to them.  I don't see anything particularly wrong with that so long as I am most focused on meeting the desires and needs of my partner without forgetting that I am allowed to decide I don't like something.  I don't think it changes my internal status with regard to the label that best fits me, but it will change over time how it manifests.

As long as a submissive can keep it together, frenzy is fun!

lovingpet   

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RE: Frenzy - 3/9/2009 5:12:49 PM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline 		This has all been very interesting to Me.  I want to thank everyone for the contributions.

Being on the other side of the kneel, I had to wonder.  The times I've encountered this from others has mostly been about the play aspect.  The "Oh Lord, I just really need to play" type.  I've been willing to top others (personal friends) to get them over the hump.  (Bad metaphor.)  It's never been the "I need to be owned" perspective that you've been showing Me here.


_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

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RE: Frenzy - 3/9/2009 8:44:05 PM   
feydeplume


Posts: 935
Joined: 12/24/2008
Status: offline 		I think that we give it a special name inside the sub-culture so that we can acknowledge the behavior pattern and describe it in terms of the priorities and 'rules' of the sub-culture. If we called it 'marriage crazy' or 'baby crazy' we would be speaking of a similar behavior pattern but with a different (potentially) outcome.

I also think it is healthy and good for a sub-culture to define and create words for its own use.

I also hypothesis that Tops and Bottoms, Dom/mes and submissives, Masters and slaves, Switches, Masochists, Sadists, et all experience the sensation of needs unmet differently and seek to meet those needs in both healthy and unhealthy ways. I could bang on about it for hours, but trust me when i say it is a much more interesting pontification in person than in print.



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RE: Frenzy - 3/10/2009 4:42:29 PM   
MaamJay


Posts: 2101
Joined: 9/2/2005
Status: offline 		I think a lot of people go through at least some level of frenzy when they discover this lifestyle, simply because it's so new and exciting! Some, both Tops and bottoms, go after the play, others go after the D/s and ownership aspects. There's also a lot of "collar frenzy" which is why there's talk of "velcro collars" ... on one week and off the next! The key to reining in the urge to rush headlong down the path is to realise it's about the journey, not the destination. But there are some who never quite understand that ...

Maam Jay aka violet[A]

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