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point of departure - 2/15/2009 3:03:30 PM

InTonguesslave

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theres a point of departure. OWl is feeling it right now, others have and will and in fact throughout a D/Ms relationship there are points along the way as it goes deeper, where the sub/slave steps a little closer to their D and a little further away from their own patterns and structures.

im feeling it right now as i begin a path away from what i perceived to be me, toward another me, a latent me, toward someone elses world where he will impact and impinge changes in how i see myself and conduct myself.

personally i need to be challenged and pushed hard. i thrive absolutely on being stretched beyond my pre-conceived capacity. i take full responsiblity for the responsiblity i hand over to him.

im not a good submissive. im proud, disobedient at times, resistant when im rattled and anxt ridden occasionally. becoming his slave is to pass all of that across to him and slip into a place that only the people in this lifestyle can really understand.

am i weak - no. am i so without a personality that i have nothing to lose - no. am i so empty that i need someone elses life to fulfill me - no.

i am me and i will always be me, but as i slip into his world and his reality i feel a great deal of me slipping away. but its the me ive structured around the world i lived in before him. its the patterns and habits i created for myself to get me through each day. some of it is relevant, some of it redundant.

me - lally, the woman, mother, podiatrist, writer, daughter, sister, friend will stay constant. me - lally the submissive will change as he imposes aspects of control over me.

we change even without realising, but so do They as They respond to the changes Theyve brought about in us.

i think what im trying to say is that this point of departure is just a process alot of people go through. giving up the old for the new is all about carrying over what we've learnt. we shouldnt lose who we are ever, but simply capitilize on what we've become.

i dont know if this will help anyone, but it helped me to think it through and write it down.

Post #: 1

RE: point of departure - 2/15/2009 3:05:30 PM

GreedyTop

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From: Savannah, GA
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Thats beautifully said, Lally! *hugs*

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Post #: 2

RE: point of departure - 2/15/2009 3:08:02 PM

InTonguesslave

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hello toots - you married woman you! have you moved to wales yet, you do realise im going to come and visit dont you!!!

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Post #: 3

RE: point of departure - 2/15/2009 3:09:04 PM

GreedyTop

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From: Savannah, GA
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I certainly hope so!! I havent got moved yet.. not sure when I will.. friggin immigration stuff to sort out. But I will be sure to let you know :)

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Waiting for my madman in a Blue Box.

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Post #: 4

RE: point of departure - 2/15/2009 3:15:17 PM

InTonguesslave

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ill swing along by then - the summer is going to be hot (ive decreed), so pack a bikini. xx

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Post #: 5

RE: point of departure - 2/15/2009 3:27:12 PM

oceanwynds

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Thank you for sharing this part of you, lally. It touched my heart. May i please copy and put into my submissive file?

owl

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Post #: 6

RE: point of departure - 2/15/2009 3:39:43 PM

InTonguesslave

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wow, of course - im kinda honoured that youd want to. xxx

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Post #: 7

RE: point of departure - 2/15/2009 3:49:07 PM

Prinsexx

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Lally: I wish you so well.

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RE: point of departure - 2/15/2009 3:58:07 PM

oceanwynds

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I am honored you will let me copy it into my submissive file. Your heart is there in every word. Thank you again.

blessings
oceanwynds

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Post #: 9

RE: point of departure - 2/15/2009 4:43:04 PM

InTonguesslave

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thanks sexy prinsexx -

this is turning into a chat room .... lol. owl do you keep a journal type thing. i have to start one, its a good idea, you forget so much that at the time you think will always burn a hole in youre brain.

im off to bed - its well past 11 (naughty me...

.... again!!! - god im hopeless at this lark i really am.... mutter mutter mutter

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Post #: 10

RE: point of departure - 2/15/2009 5:31:39 PM

chamberqueen

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From: Kalamazoo, MI
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Lally, you've come so far and I'm very proud of you! I found myself feeling the same way about a year ago and it truly changed my life for the better. I hope you will find exactly the same thing in yours.

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Post #: 11

RE: point of departure - 2/15/2009 6:27:42 PM

oceanwynds

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I am a journal junkie. I have journals for every area of my life written long hand, on my computer, filed on disks, and even have a couple jounal books gifted to me. I started a little journal book today with words of aspirations and encourage regarding submissiveness. It's a cute little bound book with floral design.

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Post #: 12

RE: point of departure - 2/16/2009 1:20:04 AM

CatdeMedici

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This was nicely set forth---its a metamorphysis that occurs with time, patience, commitment. I like to say its weaving a macrame hanger--the various strands of the T/two blend and meld to create one.

I find too often subs think they are the only ones who go through change and Dominants think they aren't supposed too.

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Post #: 13

RE: point of departure - 2/16/2009 1:44:10 AM

InTonguesslave

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thanks guys - im glad i shared it now.

chamberqueen, thanks hun - i never ever really believed id get here, to this, with a man like him - and to be going down the Ms path is a total surprise!! -

thank you CM it is a metamorphysis, absolutely - changing into a butterfly as 'queenie' puts it in her siggie.

the odd thing is how calm i feel now, mind you i get all skittish when he rings

im going to my local newsagent to buy a couple of journals. i noticed some really pretty ones the other day. xx

< Message edited by InTonguesslave -- 2/16/2009 1:46:38 AM >

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Post #: 14

RE: point of departure - 2/16/2009 7:56:21 AM

CreativeDominant

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Very nicely said, InTonguesslave...I like the phrasing of "point of departure"

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Post #: 15

RE: point of departure - 2/16/2009 12:22:50 PM

InTonguesslave

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thanks CD, yes i was quite pleased with that too, it has two meanings i realised after id written it. x

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Post #: 16

RE: point of departure - 2/16/2009 1:27:35 PM

oceanwynds

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I hope you find journaling as rich as an experience like i do. Enjoy!!

oceanwynds

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Post #: 17

RE: point of departure - 2/16/2009 5:02:46 PM

DesFIP

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From: Apple County NY
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I'm curious as to why you have to become someone else, why you chose someone who doesn't like you the way you are now?

Changing me would require a great deal of work for very small changes. I found it better to find someone who enjoys who I am now.

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Post #: 18

RE: point of departure - 2/16/2009 7:59:11 PM

lovingpet

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I will put it this way. Plenty of people love me as is. A rare few love me as is, but love me too much to let me stay that way. There are things to be improved on and hopes and dreams that deserve life and attention. Change is not always a negative.

lally: been wondering where you were hiding yourself... Now we know you lucky girl you!
Greedy: Congrats girl!
chamberqueen: I am so sorry for where things have gone, but I know you will find your way to the next step.
Prinny: Feeling better chick?
Oceanwynds: I know what you mean on the journal thing. Unfortunately my head gets too full of stuff to get it into print!

I think that's everyone!

I think I remember as you were headed this way and you both realized that the time and experiences and all of it was just right for the two of you to enter each other's lives. Sometimes life is that way. Often it is. We are not ready for the good stuff until we have the criteria to base it upon. You really seem thoroughly happy! Congrats love!

lovingpet

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Post #: 19

RE: point of departure - 2/17/2009 2:11:15 AM

ranja

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Joined: 11/1/2007
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Thank you lally
That point of departure and the feeling of acceptance equates to freedom for me...how contradictive this life is as submitting deeply gives me wings.
amanda

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Post #: 20

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